


What She'd Been Missing

by Trillhouse



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Drama, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Incest, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Obsessive-Compulsive, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Parenthood, Rape/Non-con Elements, Teen Pregnancy, sin kids
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-14
Updated: 2019-01-18
Packaged: 2019-04-22 16:15:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 94,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14312466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trillhouse/pseuds/Trillhouse
Summary: Loan wasn't sure exactly what drove her to seek out her Uncle. She needed to get away, yes... but she'd only met the man twice before. And yet, for reasons she couldn't understand... she trusted him. And for reasons HE couldn't understand, he felt an instant bond with the girl. Neither could have imagined the horrible truth that had remained buried for twenty-one years.





	1. Getting Away

**Author's Note:**

> Back again with another brand new fic instead of the shit I was supposed to be doing! For everyone waiting for the next chapter of 'More Than a Sister', I promise it's coming up next... just wanted to get this one started first.
> 
> So, for those not in the know, Loan Loud is one of the fan-made 'sin kids', AKA 'abominations'. For the most part, I am not particularly fond of them... with one exception. Perhaps it's because I enjoy writing troubled characters, I dunno. But either way, Loan struck me as a character with a lot of squandered potential, and I wanted to do her justice and make an interesting story around her. Loan is not my character nor do I claim her to be; to my knowledge her character was brought about through a collaborative effort, with the most notable figure being the artist 'Patanu'.
> 
> This is not a harem fic. This is not a ship fic. There are no other 'sin kids' within the story besides Loan. This will be a story with dark themes including angst, depression, mental illness, suicide, rape, and a whole lot of other shit. But more than anything, this story is about family, and is meant to be uplifting. If you do not like the 'sin kids', I implore you to give it a chance.
> 
> Please enjoy!

 

**Chapter 1 - Getting Away**

* * *

 

 

It was a gray, dreary day in central Michigan. To most that would be a bad thing, but to a certain nervous young woman it was extremely soothing, even as tiny droplets of rain pitter-pattered against the window. It wasn't necessarily that she  _disliked_  sunlight, it just hurt her eyes... though she assumed that was mostly her own doing.

She watched the scenery go by with muted interest, occasionally flicking her eyes towards the rotund man in the driver's seat. She couldn't remember his name. She rarely  _could_  remember people's names when she was off her meds, but she couldn't bring herself to take them today… not when her lucidity had brought her this far. Unfortunately, this also left her extremely anxious; granted, she was  _always_ anxious, but at least the pills made it manageable. Right now, however, all she could think about was how far away from home she was, how unfamiliar her surroundings were, and how she was in a car with a  _stranger._

She flicked her eyes towards the man again. He'd been nice enough thus far, and thankfully had given up on trying to make small talk with her when it became clear she wouldn't say much. She wished she could be a bit friendlier towards him, but she didn't know him… and quite frankly, even among the few people she  _did_  know there were maybe two or three that she trusted. Normally she'd be listening to music right now, but she didn't want to distract herself too much. Besides, between the gentle beating of the rain against the window and the rapid tapping of her finger on the armrest, she could kind of make out a rhythm, a tune that only she could hear.

The man shifted slightly. Had he noticed?

_**Of course he noticed. Could you be any more obvious? Just act normal. For once in your life at least PRETEND to be a normal fucking human being.** _

She forced herself to look out the window again. It's not like he could do anything while driving, right?

_**Who the hell would touch you anyway? You're disgusting.** _

She did her best to shake off the intrusive thoughts. They always came out in full force when she was off her medication.

She knew she had no reason to fear the man, but she did anyway. She feared most things. Still, this was a big step for her… the biggest she'd ever taken. Hiring a driver for such a long drive had been expensive, but it was worth it. Granted, it wasn't technically  _her_  money, but she had to get away. She had to  _leave._

She felt her phone vibrate again, for the fifteenth time in an hour. She didn't need to look at it to know it was  _her._ She wouldn't answer. Maybe someday she would, but not now. Not that there wasn't a part of her that  _wanted_  to, but she couldn't… otherwise, there would be no point to any of this.

As she watched the passing scenery, she found her eyelids growing heavy. She tried to force herself to stay awake, but it was no use… as the dark creases under her eyes would attest to, she rarely got much sleep. Before long, she found herself drifting off into a dreamless slumber.

"…iss... Miss? We've arrived." Someone was speaking to her. She scrunched up her face in annoyance, trying to wave off the intruder; she'd finally been able to get some sleep, after all. "Miss?" The voice said again.

She felt someone touch her shoulder.

Her eyes shot open instantly. The girl shrieked, recoiling in panic and frightening the man, who let out a small yelp as he fell back onto his rear. The young woman's chest heaved rapidly, staring at him with wide, frantic eyes; as the shock began to wear off, she realized that they had stopped, and the car door was open… he'd just been trying to wake her.

"O-oh… oh my God, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" The girl sputtered, but the man just chuckled softly, holding up a hand to reassure her.

"It's alright, it was my fault. I didn't mean to frighten you, Miss." The man said in a polite tone as he got to his feet, dusting himself off. He offered a hand to help the young woman out, but she just stared at it in uncomfortable silence. The man withdrew his hand, using it to stifle a cough. "R-right. Well, we've arrived. Welcome to Hazeltucky."

"O-oh… yes. A-alright." She grabbed her bag and got out, noticeably walking past the driver as quickly as possible. Her face was bright red with embarrassment. "U-um… thank you." She said quietly. "For the drive, I mean."

"No need to thank me, Miss. It's my job, after all." The man replied with a jovial voice. "I do hope the trip was pleasant for you." The girl bit her lip and nodded silently. She supposed it  _had_ been a comfortable drive, despite her nervousness. "Well then, thank you for your patronage, Miss Loud," The man said, tipping his cap to her. "Do feel free to request my services again should the need arise."

"O-oh… I will, um…"

"Kirby, Miss."

"Right... Kirby." She muttered, scratching her cheek nervously. "T-thank you. A-and I'm sorry for the trouble…"

"No trouble at all, I assure you." Kirby said with a gentle laugh. "You have yourself a wonderful day." He started to get into his car, only to stop and turn towards her again. "By the way… do I… know you from somewhere?"

The young woman frowned, thinking a moment before shaking her head. "No… no, I don't think so…"

"…Huh. I see." Kirby shrugged. "My mistake. Well, Goodbye, Miss Loud." With another tip of his hat, the chauffer got back into his car and drove off. The girl gave an awkward wave as he left, and by the time he turned the corner, she had already forgotten his name.

With a small sigh, she turned back towards the house before her. It was a nice, modest suburban home, one of many lining the residential street. The lawn was neatly trimmed, dotted with fallen leaves and a few decorative elements; a pinwheel spun in the Autumn breeze, and off to the side were a few garden gnomes that she could swear were  _staring_ at her. She shook the thought away, knowing fully well how stupid it was. All in all, it was just a suburban neighborhood like any other… or, she  _assumed_  so at least. It was all somewhat foreign to the girl… in her twenty-one years of life, she'd left the city maybe five times total, if not less.

A chilly breeze made the girl shudder slightly. She was glad she'd worn her sweater, but then again, she rarely went without it. The young woman clutched at her sleeve nervously as she stood before her destination; now that she was actually  _here,_ her anxiety was returning in full force. She felt her chest tightening, her breaths growing short and ragged… what was she  _doing_ here? What was she  _thinking?_ Maybe there was still time to call the driver back…

_**That's right. Run back home with your tail between your legs, coward. Same as always.** _

The girl grit her teeth and strode forward. She'd prove herself wrong. She could do this. She was an adult, for crying out loud.

However, as she stood at the door with her hand raised to push the doorbell, she found herself hesitating once again. What if he turned her away? Why  _wouldn't_ he? She was little more than a stranger to the man…

…And he was a stranger to her.

A lump began to form in the girl's throat. That's right… he was a stranger. She'd only met him twice in her life, and one of those times she'd been too young to even remember it. She didn't  _know_ him. So what the hell had brought her here, of all places?

Perhaps it was because he had been so nice to her when they'd last met. They only spoke briefly but, well… she  _spoke_  to him. She wasn't sure why, but something about him had just loosened her up a bit… hell, he'd even managed to get a laugh out of her, though she couldn't for the life of her remember what he had said.

Or perhaps because she knew this was the one place her mother would never look for her.

Still, she couldn't bring herself to ring the bell. She just stood there trembling, beads of sweat forming on her forehead despite the chill in the air. She was far away from home, in a town she'd never been to before, about to ring a stranger's doorbell. About to just… barge into his life. And that's only assuming the address she'd found was  _correct…_ for all she knew, this could be some murderous psychopath.

_**Go ahead. Turn back. Run back home to mommy, like you always do.** _

The young woman clutched her chest, suddenly finding it very hard to breathe.  _No… not here,_  she thought.  _Not_ _now._  She braced herself against the doorframe, hunching over as the panic set in… the other side effect of not taking her medication, unfortunately.  _Stay calm,_ she thought. She counted from one to ten, then back from ten to one.  _Stay lucid. Breathe. You can do this._

_**Don't lie. You can't do anything.** _

" _SHUT UP!_ " The girl screamed at herself. Without further hesitation, she pushed the button… several times in fact, the loud chiming sound cutting itself short with each press. She froze, her breath catching in her throat. Well, she'd done it now. No turning back.

_**Just run. Run now. You know you want to.** _

But the girl did not run. Quite frankly, she wasn't sure if she  _could_  even if she wanted to… her legs were completely frozen in place. So, she waited.

And waited.

_**See? He's not even home. Just go back. Go back n-** _

Then, she heard the telltale  _click_  of someone unlocking the front door. She could have sworn that her heart stopped for a brief moment, time seemingly moving in slow motion as the door opened.

_**Run run run run run run run run run run run run run** _

And then, there he was. Standing before her in an orange collared shirt and beige slacks, his stark white hair unmistakable.

Her Uncle, Lincoln Loud.

In the seven years since she'd seen him last, he hadn't changed much. He had a few more wrinkles under his eyes, and a faint scruff on his chin, his white hair making it almost impossible to notice unless you looked closely. He'd also developed the slightest hint of paunch around his midsection, but even at thirty-three he still looked fairly young.

As he laid eyes on the girl standing before him, whatever greeting he'd been about to give had died on his lips. For a brief moment, he looked as though he'd seen a ghost. "L-Lor-" He began, but then his brow furrowed as he realized that, no… this was not Lori. She was too young, too thin, too…  _disheveled._ With no makeup to speak of, the heavy bags under her eyes were apparent, and her hair, while undeniably similar, was longer and unkempt. But… he  _knew_  her. "Hang on…  _Loan?_ "

Loan gave a small wave, a tiny, nervous smile creeping across her face. "H-hi, Uncle Lincoln…" She mumbled. She could only bear to look him in the eye for a brief moment before staring at the ground, fidgeting awkwardly. "It's, um… it's been a while…"

"Yeah…" Lincoln muttered. He shook his head slightly to clear his mind and put on a warm smile for the girl. "How have you been?"

"I'm… good…" Loan said quietly.

There was a heavy, tense atmosphere between the two; Lincoln averted his eyes for a moment, lightly drumming his fingers against his arm. "Sooo… what brings you here?" He glanced behind her, noticing no car in the driveway, nor bike, nor… anything really. How had she even  _gotten_  here?

"I-I, um…" The nervous girl stuttered, shrinking back a bit. She opened her mouth to speak, then quickly shut it tightly. She hadn't actually thought about what she was going to  _say_  when she got here… conversation did not come easy to Loan. She swallowed. "I… I…"

_**Go on. Tell him. Use your words you idiot.** _

"…I don't know."

_**You're a real fucking piece of work, you know that?** _

For his part, Lincoln could only stare perplexed at his niece. He scanned her body briefly; her ragged appearance, her withdrawn posture, the way she fitfully rolled her forefoot against the ground.

The duffle bag over her shoulder.

Quite frankly, even a casual observer would be able to tell that something was wrong here… the girl's troubled demeanor was anything but subtle, after all. But the bag she carried with her told a deeper story. "Loan…" He began with a gentle voice. "Did you… come here alone?"

Loan let out a quiet whimper. She couldn't look at the man before her… he didn't want her here, she  _knew_ it. This was his home, his life. She didn't  _belong_ here.

_**You don't belong anywhere.** _

Loan could feel her chest tightening up again. She began noticeably trembling in apprehension, and Lincoln's brow furrowed with concern.

"Loan, are you-"

" _I-I'm sorry!_ " She blurted out suddenly, squeezing her eyes shut. "I'll go…!"

"W-wait!" Lincoln said, reaching out and gently grasping her wrist as she turned away.

" _Ah!_ " Loan yelped and quickly yanked her arm free, as though his touch had burned her. Lincoln looked at the frightened girl with a mixture of confusion and sympathy on his face; Loan simply stood trembling, her pupils contracted into tiny pinpricks. She swallowed and took a deep breath to calm herself.

_**Good job. You freaked out again, and now he thinks you're crazy. Of course… you ARE crazy, aren't you…?** _

Loan straightened herself as best as she could, staring at the ground as she clutched her wrist. "…I'm sorry," She said softly.

"N-no… don't apologize." Her Uncle sighed softly, scratching the back of his head. He mentally cursed himself for being so forceful with the girl… she was clearly on edge, after all. "Listen, um… would you like to come inside?" He offered. Loan opened her mouth to speak, but once again nothing came out; she bit her lip and looked off to the side in consideration.

_**Just run. He's just being nice, he doesn't want you here. Run. Your mother will forgive you as long as you turn back now. Run. RUN.** _

"I-I, ah…" Loan forced herself to look up at her Uncle. Her refusal died on her lips as her gaze met his blue eyes… so kind. So accepting. He wasn't telling her to come in… he was inviting her. Loan took a deep breath and forced down her doubts.  _Enough,_ she told herself.  _I'm here. I'm not going back. Not yet._ "Y-yes. Thank you."

A small smile crossed Lincoln's face and he stepped aside to let her in. Loan hesitated a brief moment, taking one last look over her shoulder…

…And then she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket again.

Loan steeled herself and strode past her Uncle into the house.

The first thing that struck Loan was just how spacious the house was. Not that her home was  _small,_ mind you, but even a luxury apartment like the one she shared with her mother would naturally be a bit compact. As she glanced around the living room, wringing her hands, she couldn't help but feel a bit overwhelmed by it all. The high ceiling dwarfed her, and yet… there was something distinctly  _homey_ about the place. The house was well-lit, the walls a pleasant beige color, the furnishings simple yet inviting. It was a far cry from the sterile, dark grey-and-blue modern décor that her mother was so fond of.

The room held a dark brown L-shaped sofa that looked quite soft, compared to the stiff and boxy design of the couch at her apartment. Sitting before that was a glass-topped coffee table, and on the opposite wall was an entertainment center topped with a nicely-sized flatscreen TV. On the right side of the room was an opening that Loan figured must lead to a dining room or kitchen, and about five feet or so past that was a stairway leading up to a balcony overlooking the living room.

"So, uh… welcome." Lincoln said, snapping the girl out of her daze; she jumped slightly, as though she had forgotten he was there. "It's not much, but…"

"N-no… it's really nice." Loan muttered, earning a small smile from her Uncle. "I, um… I'm sorry about just showing up like this..."

"No worries," Lincoln assured her, waving his hand dismissively. "My home's always open to family." Somehow, that settled the girl's nerves slightly.  _That's right,_ she thought.  _He's not a stranger. He's my Uncle. I can trust him, right?_

"Lincoln?" Loan heard a female voice from the adjacent room, and a moment later a tall Hispanic woman entered, sporting an apron. She was somehow both slightly masculine and strikingly pretty, with freckled olive skin and her black hair pulled into a ponytail. "Who was-" The woman's eyes widened in shock as she laid eyes on Loan, and she seemed to freeze in place for a moment. And then, her face contorted in anger… no, pure, blistering  _rage._ " _You…_ " She hissed, making the young woman shrink back in fright.

"I-I, uh…" Loan stammered.

"How  _dare_ you-"

" _Whoa!_ Ronnie, stop!" Lincoln interjected, grabbing her by the arm as she began to take a step towards Loan. "E-excuse us for a second…" He muttered to Loan before dragging the furious woman back into the dining room. Loan just watched in silent confusion, her heart pounding slightly. She was sure she'd never met that woman in her life, and yet… it was unabashedly clear that she  _hated_ her.

_**See? You're not welcome here.** _

_Shut up,_ Loan told herself.

 

* * *

 

"Let  _go_ of me!" Ronnie snapped, pulling her arm free from her husband's grip.

"Ronnie, please, calm-"

"I will  _not_ calm down!" She snarled, pointing toward the living room. "What the  _hell_ is that whore doing in  _my_ home?!"

" _Ronnie!_ " Lincoln said, raising his voice slightly as he grabbed his wife by the shoulders. "That's  _not_ Lori!" Ronnie's brow furrowed slightly.

"What do you-"

"It's not Lori," Lincoln repeated, gently squeezing her shoulders. "She's my niece, Loan." Ronnie blinked in confusion, and then leaned over to peer out from the doorway. Thankfully, the girl was staring down at the floor and didn't notice her; however, taking a closer look, it was indeed not Lori. Ronnie frowned and turned back to her husband.

"She's…"

"Lori's, yeah." Lincoln sighed. Ronnie's scowl returned, though far lesser than before. Given the depth of her hatred for his oldest sister, Lincoln was hardly surprised that she'd be a bit apprehensive about the sudden visitor.

"She looks just like her," Ronnie muttered quietly, a note of sadness in her voice. Lincoln's expression softened and he pulled his wife close.

"I know, honey. But she's  _not_  her." He said softly. Ronnie still looked conflicted, but nonetheless her expression relaxed slightly.

"What's she doing here?" She asked under her breath.

"I… I don't know. I'm going to find out." He assured his wife. "Just… please, be nice to her. She's… a bit on edge." Ronnie raised an eyebrow before taking another glance at the girl. Now, she noticed the tense posture, the awkward shuffling, the occasional twitch of her eye… quite frankly, 'on edge' was a huge understatement.

"Lincoln…" She began, "Is there… something  _wrong_ with her…?" Lincoln opened his mouth to respond, but in truth, he had no idea. Really, he didn't know much about the girl at all.

"…Look, just let me worry about it, okay?" He said, giving Ronnie a reassuring smile. "Now, come on. I'll introduce you." Ronnie sucked her teeth in consideration, then let out a small sigh.

"…Fine. I guess… I should apologize, at least." Lincoln grinned, but Ronnie just shot him a stern look. "But I swear, if you just brought a junkie into the house…"

"Ronnie, she's not a junkie." Her husband groaned.  _At least, I hope not._  Taking her by the hand, he led his reluctant wife back into the living room. "Loan?"

" _IDIDN'TTOUCHANYTHING!_ " The girl yelped, jumping back from the picture she'd been examining, only to back into a tall vase, making it wobble. She discretely grabbed it to steady it before tucking her hands behind her back and giving a sheepish grin.

_**Smooth, Loan. Smooth.** _

Lincoln shared an aside glance with Ronnie before clearing his throat. "R-right… well, I wanted to introduce you to my wife."

"Ronalda," Ronnie said, forcing a smile as she extended her hand in greeting. "Call me Ronnie."

Loan looked at the outstretched hand as though it were some sort of space alien; her eyes flicked from Ronnie's hand to her face, then back to her hand, then to her face once more before finally settling on her hand.

_**For fuck's sake Loan you know how to shake a hand. What's wrong with you?** _

Slowly, awkwardly, Loan raised a trembling hand and lightly grasped the ends of her Aunt's fingers, giving her hand what could only charitably be referred to as a shake. "L-Loan," She mumbled. "Call me, um… Loan." Ronnie cocked an eyebrow and Loan quickly withdrew her hand. "O-or not! Call me whatever you want…!" She said with a nervous, forced laugh.

"Oooookay…" Ronnie murmured under her breath, only for Lincoln to elbow her slightly. "W-well, nice to meet you Loan. And, um…" Ronnie coughed, her cheeks flushing slightly. "…Sorry about earlier. I, uh… I thought you were somebody else."

"It's… it's fine…" Loan muttered, scratching her cheek. "That… happens a lot." Ronnie took a moment to examine the young woman standing before her. It really was uncanny… were she to clean herself up a bit, she would nearly be a dead ringer for a young Lori Loud. She felt the anger boiling up inside her again and took a deep breath to force it down.  _She's not Lori,_ she reminded herself.

"Anyway… I was just about to put on some tea. Would you like some?" Loan seemed to perk up a bit at that; she did like tea, after all. It was one of the few things that could calm her nerves.

"U-um…" The nervous girl stammered. "Do you… have chamomile?"

"Of course," Ronnie replied. "You take honey or sugar?"

"Oh, um… honey, please. Sugar makes me jittery."

"You don't say…" Lincoln shot his wife a mildly annoyed glance, and she simply rolled her eyes. "Alright, I'll be back in a bit. Make yourself at home, Loan." Ronnie said with a smirk before heading back to the kitchen.

"Sorry…" Lincoln said with a small chuckle. "Ronnie can be a bit rough around the edges, but she means well."

"N-no… she's nice." Loan had a tiny, yet genuine smile on her face; clearly, she hadn't picked up on her Aunt's sarcasm.

"So… would you like to sit down?" Lincoln asked, gesturing towards the sofa. Loan looked over at the sofa for several seconds, then back to her Uncle with a somewhat uncertain expression on her face.

"Is… is that alright?" She mumbled as she fiddled with the strap on her duffle bag.

"Well… yeah. Like Ronnie said, make yourself at home." For some reason, her Uncle's kind smile calmed Loan somewhat… she gave a small nod and shuffled around to the front of the sofa.

To her delight, she found that the couch was exactly as soft and comfortable as it looked. The moment her rear end touched the cushion, she couldn't help but give a blissful sigh and settle back against it, sprawling out slightly. She knew it was rude to get so comfortable in a stranger's house, but…

…No… this wasn't a stranger's house, was it? It was her Uncle's.

Lincoln made sure to sit on the opposite end of the couch so as not to disturb her… it was clear that she didn't like to be too close to others, let alone be touched. For some time, neither said anything, and Lincoln took a moment to study the girl… he was absolutely perplexed as to what have possibly brought her  _here,_  of all places. He'd only ever met Loan twice… once when she was four, and again when she was fourteen. They had been the only two times Lori had saw fit to join in the family's annual Christmas get-together.

When he'd first met her, she seemed like a normal girl. A bit shy perhaps, but normal enough. He hadn't really gotten to know her then, however… Lori had kept the girl on a tight leash, and in fact seemed to take issue with Lincoln trying to speak to her.

The second time he met her, however, it became clear that something was  _off_ about the girl. While the rest of the family socialized and celebrated with one another, Loan had sat alone… completely withdrawn. Aside from her mother, only Luna and Sam seemed to be on friendly terms with her. Few bothered to speak to her, and those that  _did_  make the attempt would soon give up trying. But Lincoln was a patient sort, and quite frankly he felt bad for the girl. It took some doing, but once he started talking about video games she'd finally started to open up a bit. She'd proven to be surprisingly easy to talk to after that, and it turned out they shared a lot of interests… games, comics, anime. Quite frankly, he'd enjoyed talking to her.

That is, until Lori suddenly decided that they needed to be going.

Lincoln frowned.  _Lori._  What had happened, there? Once, they had been so close… but as soon as she left for college, everything changed. The first blow had been the sudden news of her pregnancy, barely even a month after she had left. It was something they'd all expected would happen someday, but not so  _soon._ Not at  _eighteen._

And not with someone besides Bobby.

Quite frankly, that had been the biggest shocker of all. That Lori would cheat on the man that had been working his ass off so they could be together, the man she'd said was her  _soul mate,_ it just made no sense. To this day, the details were unclear… all she would say was that she had gotten too drunk at a party and ended up hooking up with some guy. That was it. Just some… random guy.

And even then, Bobby had been willing to forgive her. He'd been willing to chalk the whole incident up to a drunken mistake, a one-time thing that she would have taken back if she could. He'd been willing to  _raise_ Lori's baby as if it had been his own. But no… instead, Lori left him. To this day, Lincoln couldn't imagine  _why…_ there was no other man. As far as Lincoln could tell, she had still loved him. And yet, just like that… she left him.

Poor Bobby was heartbroken, of course.  _Beyond_  heartbroken. It had been easy to forget just how  _devoted_  Bobby was to the girl… every job he'd worked, every sacrifice he'd ever made, it had all been for Lori's sake. For two months, he'd tried to win her back… he did everything he possibly could to show her just how much she meant to him. And again and again, Lori snubbed him, until he just couldn't take the heartache anymore.

Ronnie Anne had been the one to find him.

After that, Lori became a different person. She distanced herself from most of the family, focusing the entirety of her efforts on her education and her child. To Lincoln's understanding, she'd had several boyfriends that had never lasted long… not that he would know. While Lori maintained contact with the others in some capacity, she'd pretty much entirely cut out Lincoln from her life. He'd made several attempts to reconnect with her, but to no avail; even when he'd seen her in person, she was curt and standoffish. It had hurt. It  _still_  hurt, to some extent… though he'd come to except that that was just how things would be from now on. Besides, Ronnie had never forgiven her for what happened to Bobby.

And yet… for some reason, Lori's daughter had come  _here._ Lincoln wasn't even sure how she'd gotten his address at all, let alone what could have driven her to seek him out in the first place. But what troubled him the most was that, as bad as she had been at fourteen… she now seemed to be a complete nervous wreck.

Just what had  _happened_  over there?

"So, Loan…" Lincoln began. "How's your mom…?"

"Oh, she's… she's good..." Lincoln could see the girl's relaxed expression fade slightly as soon as he mentioned her mother. He could see her hand tense up slightly before releasing, her leg beginning to bounce anxiously… little things that most wouldn't take note of. But Lincoln's line of work had made him incredibly perceptive of small details.

"It's been a while since I've talked to her-"

"I know."

Lincoln raised his eyebrows slightly. That had been an incredibly fast response, especially for Loan… and also very enlightening. Clearly, she knew that Lincoln's relationship with her mother was… strained, to say the least. Lincoln let out a small sigh, leaning forward and folding his hands together between his knees. "Loan… Lori doesn't know you're here, does she?" Loan didn't even need to speak for his suspicions to be confirmed… her expression said enough. She looked downcast, biting her lip so hard that Lincoln could swear that she would draw blood. Her hands were balled tightly into fists in her lap, and it looked like her shoulders were trembling.

"Loan, look…" Lincoln said in a quiet, gentle tone. "You don't need to tell me anything you don't want to. But you're family, and I'd like to help you if I can." Loan hesitated for a few moments, running her tongue across her dry lips; she really wished she'd remembered to grab her chapstick.

"I, um…" Loan choked out, barely louder than a whisper. She forced herself to look up, her blue eyes meeting her Uncle's. "I had to get away. At… at least for a little bit." The young woman shut her eyes and took a deep breath. "I'm… I'm sorry I just turned up like this."

_**You're not sorry. You're just a coward.** _

Lincoln pursed his lips, giving a small nod of understanding. "You don't need to apologize. But, if you don't mind me asking… why  _here?_ " Loan tensed up again and looked away, her face scrunching up slightly in regret.

"I-I can go-"

"N-no… I didn't mean it like that," Lincoln sighed. "I don't mind you being here, but… why  _here_ of all places? Aren't you closer with your Aunts?" Loan frowned, nervously rubbing at her arm. He wasn't wrong, of course…

…But.

"I… needed to go somewhere mom wouldn't look for me." She said simply. Before Lincoln could press his niece further, she glanced up at the second floor, raising her eyebrows slightly in surprise. He followed her gaze to see a young boy peeking out from between the balusters. Lincoln smiled warmly.

"Bobby! Come down here for a second, will you?" Lincoln beckoned the child. Bobby gave a small, sheepish nod and slowly made his way down the stairs, before running to his father's side. He seemed to be hiding behind the armrest slightly as he stared at the unfamiliar woman. "Loan, this is my son Robert. We call him Bobby. Bobby, this is Loan… your cousin."

Loan's face seemed to light up slightly. "Hello, Bobby." She greeted the young boy, smiling sweetly. "It's nice to meet you."

"H-hello." Bobby replied quietly, tucking himself a little further behind his father. The resemblance was easy to see… his skin was maybe half a shade darker than Lincoln's, with freckles dotting his cheeks and a small yet noticeable overbite. He shared his father's baby blue eyes, but his nose was smaller like Ronnie's. Topping all that was a messy head of black hair.

"You're very cute." Said Loan; Lincoln was surprised at the complete shift in demeanor. Her nervousness seemed to all but disappear, and the smile on her face was steady and unwavering. Bobby, however, withdrew further, a faint blush spreading across his cheeks.

"…Thank you…" He muttered before turning to his father and tugging his sleeve. "Where's mommy?"

"In the kitchen-" Before Lincoln could finish, the boy had already dashed off. Lincoln could only give a small laugh. "Well, that's Bobby… he's, uh, a bit shy."

"That's okay," Loan giggled. "He's adorable. How, um… how old is he?"

"Seven," Lincoln replied, leaning back into the sofa a bit. "You like kids, huh?"

"I do," Loan admitted. "I always used to want a little brother or sister, but…" Loan trailed off, her expression growing somewhat wistful. "…You know."

Lincoln looked at his niece with a sympathetic expression. "I'm sorry. It… must have been lonely." Loan nodded slowly, fiddling with her sleeve a bit.

"Mom… works a lot…" She mumbled under her breath. "B-but… she tries. She really does…" Loan bit her lip and swallowed. "It's just… I-I don't make it easy for her, you know…?"

"What do you-" Just then, a loud whistling noise rang out from the kitchen; Loan jumped, letting out a small yelp before realizing it was just the tea kettle. With a small groan of shame, she buried her face in her palm.

"…That." She said quietly. "That's what I mean."

A moment later, Ronnie returned with a tray; two steaming cups of tea sat upon it, as well as a small plate of biscotti. Granted, chamomile tea wasn't really the best accompaniment for biscotti, but quite frankly she figured the girl could use something to eat… she looked borderline emaciated. "Here you go," She said as she set the tray down on the coffee table. "Careful… it's still hot."

"T-thank you, Mrs. Loud…"

"I told you, Ronnie's fine." Ronnie corrected her, waving her hand dismissively. "Anyway, I need to get started on dinner… is it safe to say you'll be joining us, Loan?"

"Um…" Loan glanced at her Uncle in uncertainty, and he gave her a warm smile in return.

"She will."

"I-if it's not too much trouble, that is." The girl added, wringing her hands slightly. Ronnie simply nodded, smirking slightly.

"It's not. You okay with chicken cacciatore?" Loan opened her mouth, only for the words to die on her lips; she actually had no idea what that was. Ronnie seemed to pick up on this, and simply chuckled softly. "You'll like it." Loan gave a small nod of approval. "Good. I'll leave you two to it, then." Ronnie exchanged a brief glance with her husband before returning to the kitchen, her expression hard to read even for him.

"Ronnie's an amazing cook," Lincoln explained as he picked up one of the steaming mugs. "It's what she does for a living, actually."

"I-I see…" Loan muttered as she also took one of the cups, blowing on it a few times before taking a small sip. It was good, with just the right amount of honey to not overpower the chamomile. She shut her eyes and let out a small sigh as the warmth spread through her body, comforting her somewhat.

For some time there was silence between the two, though not as tense as it had been before. In fact, Loan felt strangely peaceful, even in such unfamiliar surroundings.

Perhaps more peaceful than her own home.

"Um… Uncle Lincoln?"

"Yeah?"

"I, uh…" Loan stammered. "Thank you. For… for putting up with me, I mean."

Lincoln smiled softly. "You don't need to thank me for anything."

"I do." Loan said with a small shake of her head. "I know I'm kind of… you know. A mess. It's not usually this bad. I uh… I didn't take my medication today."

_**Go on. Tell him you're crazy. Drive him away, just like everyone else.** _

Lincoln frowned slightly before taking a sip of his own tea. "Why not?"

Loan bit her lip slightly and averted her eyes. "It… helps with a lot of things. A  _lot._ " She emphasized. "But it makes me…" She took a moment to find the right words. "I just needed to be in my right mind today."

' _ **Right mind'. That's the funniest fucking thing I've ever heard.**_

" _Stop it,_ " Loan hissed under her breath.

"What was that?" Lincoln asked, cocking an eyebrow slightly. Loan coughed into her hand, her cheeks turning slightly pink.

"N-nothing…" She lied. "Anyway, my meds make me more… compliant. And I needed to  _leave._  So… I didn't take them."

Lincoln drummed his fingers against his knees in thought. He'd been trying not to press the girl too hard, but now she seemed to be more receptive. "Why did you need to leave?" He asked. Loan hesitated a moment, her eyes focused on nothing in particular.

"I… love my mother." Loan sighed. "But sometimes she's just... she…" The young woman trailed off.

"Does she, um…" Lincoln began a bit hesitantly. "Does she  _hit_  you?"

Loan's eyes shot wide open. " _NO!_ " She snapped louder than she intended. "I-I mean… no… no, not any-" Loan caught herself before finishing that thought. She hunkered down slightly, suddenly looking very small. "…She hasn't. She doesn't. She… she's good to me."

_**Better than you deserve.** _

Needless to say, Lincoln was far from convinced. He looked at his niece with a furrowed brow and narrowed eyes, trying to read her expression, but she wouldn't look at him. He remembered when he'd grasped her wrist earlier, the way she'd panicked at even the slightest touch… the look of utter  _fear_  in her eyes. He couldn't be sure, of course, but it was definitely troubling. He may not know the girl well, but she was still family… and nothing was more important to him than family.

Lincoln exhaled through his nose as he set down his mug and got to his feet. "Sit tight, Loan. I… have to take care of something real quick."

"O-oh… um, alright." Loan muttered as her Uncle headed towards the kitchen.

 

* * *

 

"…And were you planning to  _discuss_ this with me at any point?!"

"Ronnie…" Lincoln sighed. "She just needs a place to stay for a few days, at least. We  _have_ a guest room-"

"What do you mean 'at least'?!" Ronnie snapped. "Lincoln, we know nothing about this girl! For God's sake, you still don't even know why she's  _here!_ "

"She's  _family_. That's enough for me." Her husband shot back. Ronnie just clicked her tongue in frustration. "Honey, look… you see how she is. I think something bad has been going on, and I'm not just going to turn my back on her. And she's  _your_  niece too, you know… regardless of who her mother is."

"I know, I know…" Ronnie sighed.

"Besides… I've been talking to her. She's a good person, Ronnie. She's just a little… mixed up right now."

"Alright,  _fine._ " Ronnie groaned. "Fine. She can stay, for now. But you'd better get to the bottom of this soon," She said, poking Lincoln in the chest for emphasis. "Adult or not, she ran away from home."

"I know. Don't worry, I'll take care of it." Lincoln smiled and gave his wife a deep kiss, flustering her somewhat. "Thanks, baby… I knew you'd understand." Ronnie may have retained much of her bluster from when they were kids, but deep down inside she was a sweetheart.

"A-alright…" Ronnie coughed, quickly turning back to the countertop. "Now go on, before I change my mind." But before leaving, a devious smirk crossed Lincoln's face; while his wife was distracted, he reached over and gave her an open-handed slap across the rear. Ronnie yelped in surprise, her face going bright red.

"Seeya later, sweetcheeks~" Lincoln teased before bolting out of the room, narrowly avoiding a saucepan aimed straight for his head. One of these days, he knew she'd actually manage to hit him… but he supposed that fiery nature was one of the things that made him fall for Ronnie in the first place.

"Hey, Lo-" He began as he returned to the living room, only to cut himself short; his niece lay slumped over on the couch, snoring softly with her head resting on her arm. A small chuckle escaped his lips as he took the afghan that lay draped over the back of the sofa and carefully covered the sleeping girl with it. She fidgeted slightly, but thankfully did not wake.

Lincoln couldn't help but linger for a bit, watching Loan sleep peacefully. It was hard to believe this was the same girl that had shown up at his doorstep a nervous wreck. He'd admittedly been a bit uncertain of her at first, but after talking to her for a bit, there was no denying that she was a sweet person.

That said, she was clearly unstable… though he figured that was at least partly due to her not taking her medication. When he'd met her seven years prior she'd been nowhere near this bad, at any rate. Still… something gave him the feeling that, meds or not, she was  _far_  worse off than she had been. In any case, something was  _very_  wrong.

Admittedly, he hadn't so much as thought about her since he'd seen her last. Even then there had unmistakably been something  _off_ about her, and seeing her in this state made him regret not looking into things further. He hoped that his hunch wasn't right, that Lori hadn't been abusing the poor girl. Lori had always been bossy, but  _abusive?_  That wasn't the Lori he knew.

Then again… he supposed he didn't know Lori at all, anymore.

Lincoln's brow furrowed as he looked down at his niece's face. Despite her haggard appearance, she definitely  _was_ a pretty girl… not too surprising, given her resemblance to Lori. The degree to which she looked like her mother was genuinely startling; none of his other nieces or nephews resembled their parents even half as much, but Loan may as well have been a carbon copy of his sister. From the shape of her face, to the color of her hair, to her button nose, to her freckles-

…Wait. Freckles?

Lincoln's eyes narrowed slightly. They were barely noticeable, but they were definitely  _there…_ given her pale skin, he assumed that she didn't get a whole lot of sun, otherwise they might be more apparent. But that wasn't too odd, right? After all, freckles  _did_ run in the family. Lori didn't have them, but whatever gene  _caused_  them was probably in there somewhere. That, or Loan's father had them. Either way, it wasn't particularly unusual.

Lots of people have freckles, after all.

What  _was_ a bit unusual was the strange feeling that she gave him. Something he couldn't quite put his finger on, nor could he explain. It was as though he knew her better than he actually did, or, rather, that he  _should._ What he did understand, however, was that for whatever reason… he wanted to  _protect_  this girl. Lincoln wasn't sure what compelled him to do so, but he found himself reaching out and gently stroking the sleeping girl's hair.

In her sleep, Loan shifted slightly before a faint smile crossed her face.

 

* * *

 

"Ohhh yeah, this room is  _bitchin'!_ " Luna Loud-Sharp exclaimed cheerfully as she and her wife stepped into the luxury suite they'd be sharing for the next several nights. With their torn jeans, t-shirts and leather jackets, the two rockers looked strikingly out of place amongst the lavish décor… but with fame came fortune, and with fortune came excess.

"Yes, well, don't get  _too_ comfortable." A thin, gaudy-looking man with greased-back hair, a bright yellow suit with sunglasses to match, and a money-print tie of all things said as he followed them in. "Quite frankly, we're lucky the Chez Royale was even willing to  _take_  you, given your reputations."

"Comes with the territory, Jerry." Sam grunted to her manager with a shrug before nonchalantly chucking her suitcase into a nearby chair. "We're rockers. We trash shit."

"Sammy, baby, you're beautiful, but you gotta understand that  _I'm_ the guy that has to deal with the fallout." Jerry sighed. "At  _least_ promise me you'll keep the damage to a minimum?  _Under_  five-thousand dollars?"

"Ten." Luna counter-offered.

"The things I do for you two..." The manager groaned. "Alright fine. Now, tomorrow-"

"We know, we know, dude. Don't get your panties in a bunch." Luna said, waving the man off. "Up by ten for tech rehearsal. We got this."

"And no…  _funny business_  either." Jerry made air-quotes as he spoke. "You know what I mean."

"No worries, man. We'll be on our  _best_ behavior, scout's honor." Sam promised with an exaggerated grin, crossing her fingers behind her back. Her manager simply sighed.

"Alright. Rest up, you two. Big day tomorrow… and again,  _best behavior!_ " Jerry reminded them before exiting. Luna and Sam merely exchanged sly grins.

"We're gonna fuck in the pool, aren't we."

"Damn straight." Sam replied before pulling her lover in for a kiss.

As a band fronted by a lesbian couple, it was hardly surprising that they'd managed to draw attention both good and bad… let alone with a name like 'The Velvet Lips'. But it wasn't until their third album that their careers really started to take off. Since then their lives had been a whirlwind of recording, touring, and controversy… but, as Jerry would say, there was no such thing as bad publicity. In any case, through it all they had each other.

"I'm pretty beat," Sam said as they broke the kiss. "Mind if I get the shower first?"

"Go for it, babe." Luna stretched, feeling her back pop in several places. "I need to take a load off anyway." As Sam headed for the bathroom, Luna flopped down on the king-sized bed and let out a long sigh of comfort. As rad as their tour bus was, being cooped up in there for days on end could get pretty exhausting. She kicked off her boots and threw them to the far end of the room, only to hear the telltale shattering of a lamp being knocked over.  _Eh,_ she figured,  _how much could a lamp cost anyway?_

' _TAKE MY ADVICE AND DON'T BE A MOOCH! GRAB LIFE BY THE LIPS AND GIVE IT A SMOOCH!'_

Luna didn't even need to check the caller ID to know who it was; she'd set custom ringtones for everyone on her contact list, even people she barely knew. She answered without hesitation. "Yo, bro! What's the haps?"

' _Hey, Luna. How's it going?'_ Came the voice of Lincoln. Luna couldn't help but notice that he sounded slightly less chipper than usual.

"Can't complain. We're in St. Louis now… just got to our room."

' _Nice. Gonna trash it?'_

"You know it," Luna replied with a smirk. "So what's up with you?"

' _Well…'_ Lincoln began.  _'You're still close with Lori, right?'_

Luna frowned slightly. 'Close' was definitely an overstatement. "…We still keep in touch, if that's what you mean. Why?"

' _It's just… Loan's here.'_

Luna raised an eyebrow in confusion. "What does Luan have to do with anything?"

' _No,_ _Lo_ _an.'_ Lincoln clarified.  _'…Lori's daughter.'_

Luna froze, her eyes going wide. "…What…?" She gasped quietly.

' _Yeah… she just kind of showed up on my doorstep,'_ Lincoln continued.  _'She's sleeping on the couch right now.'_

A cold sweat began to form on Luna's forehead, her brow furrowed in confusion. "U-um…" She stammered. "What… what's she doing there, Lincoln?"

' _Well, I was hoping you might have an idea…'_ Lincoln sighed.  _'I think she had some kind of fight with Lori, but I'm not sure. All she would say was that she needed to_ _leave_ _, and that she figured her mom wouldn't look for her here.'_

"Oh…" Luna murmured. "I-I see."

' _Look… do you know if anything's been going on between her and Lori?'_

"Like… going on how?"

' _I don't know... any problems between them, I guess.'_  Her brother said, the concern in his voice evident.  _'Like… she just seems really nervous and jumpy.'_

"Well, that's kinda how she is, dude." The rocker said with a frown. "She's a bit… out of tune, y'know?"

' _I guess, but I think it might be more than that.'_ Lincoln said softly.  _'I mean, she seems_ _scared_ _of her mother. I just… I'm worried about her.'_

Luna bit her lip and looked off to the side. "L-look, bro… I can give you Lori's number-"

' _No_ _! I… I'd rather not get her involved, yet.'_

"But she's… she's Lori's daughter, Lincoln."

' _Luna, she came here to get away from Lori. I can't just… give her over.'_ Lincoln muttered.  _'Not until I figure out what's going on here. Besides… she's an adult. If she doesn't want to see Lori, nobody can make her.'_

Luna took a deep breath and buried her face in her palm. Why did this have to be happening? Why, of all places, did Loan have to go  _there?_  "I… um…" Luna swallowed. "What do you want from me, Lincoln?"

' _I dunno… I guess nothing, if you don't know anything.'_ Lincoln huffed.  _'Just… please don't tell Lori.'_

Luna opened her mouth to speak, but the words died on her lips. She wanted to tell him the truth. She wanted to confess everything to him, but it wasn't her place to do so.

' _Luna? You there?'_

"U-um… yeah." She croaked. "Yeah… I won't, dude." She could hear her brother sigh in relief; it only made her feel worse.

' _Thanks, Luna. I promise, I'll get this figured out.'_

"Yeah… I know you will." Luna muttered.

' _Well, talk to you later, then. Good luck at the show!'_

"Thanks, Lincoln…" Luna sighed softly. "And… I'm sorry." Lincoln couldn't help but find the way she said that to be slightly off, but before he could question her on it she had already hung up. Luna took a deep breath and held it for several seconds before releasing it. Her mind was swimming with questions… why had Loan run away? How did she  _get_  there? How did she even find out where Lincoln lived?

Whatever the case, Loan had made her way to the one place she was never supposed to be. Maybe it was fate. Maybe it was karma. Maybe it was just dumb, blind chance. As much as part of her wanted to let things play out… she just couldn't. If the truth came out, her brother may never be the same. And Loan… the poor girl was damaged enough as it was. The truth could very well  _destroy_  her.

She had to get Loan out of there.

Luna opened her contacts list. She hesitated briefly, considering her options… could she really betray her brother's trust so easily?

Then again… she'd been betraying her brother for twenty-one years.

Luna squeezed her eyes shut, silently apologizing to Lincoln one more time. And then, she called Lori.

 

* * *

 

Unsurprisingly, dinner was something of an awkward affair that night. Bobby was completely silent, the presence of a stranger clearly making him uncomfortable. Meanwhile, it took Loan over ten minutes to even begin eating… she'd found it necessary to separate every component of the dish into its own corner of the plate. As much as Lincoln would have liked to ask her  _why_ she did that, he had a feeling she wouldn't have much of an answer for him. In any case, her face lit up upon taking the first bite, so she clearly enjoyed it.

"S-so, Loan…" Ronnie began. "Are you in college?"

"Huh…?" Loan looked up from her plate. "O-oh… no. I was, but… not anymore." She muttered, looking slightly downcast.

_**Tell them. Tell them you gave up, just like you always do.** _

"So… what  _do_ you do then?" Ronnie asked, earning her another elbow from her husband. Thankfully, Loan didn't seem offended by the question.

"I… I like games. Older ones, mostly. And… anime, and stuff…" She answered, a small smile on her face. "And… I like to draw..."

"Oh, you're an artist?"

"W-well, I don't know if I'd say that…" Loan stammered, giving a nervous laugh. "I… I just do it for fun…"

_**You'll never be anything.** _

"Everyone starts somewhere," Lincoln said. "I used to just draw for fun too."

"You draw…?" Loan asked, perking up slightly.

"He's a professional illustrator," Ronnie smirked slightly. "For comic books."

Loan simply stared at her Uncle in silence for a few moments. Then, her pupils nearly doubled in size, her eyes sparkling in awe. "That's… that's so cool…"

"W-well… Ronnie gives me too much credit…" Lincoln gave a humble laugh. "I'm just an inker. The pencillers are the ones who-"

"N-no!" Loan gasped, suddenly leaning forward excitedly. "Inkers are really, really important! Th-the pencillers make the groundwork, but the inkers give it life! It's awesome! You're…" Loan suddenly clammed up, her face going bright red as she shrank back in her seat. "S-sorry. I, um… I like comics."

Lincoln and his wife simply exchanged an aside glace. Quite frankly, that was the most animated the girl had been all night; they both chuckled softly. "I can't blame you," Lincoln said. "Comics are awesome."

Loan gave a small, sheepish nod, a tiny smile creeping back along her face. "They are."

"…I'm done." Bobby said suddenly, the first words he had spoken the entire meal. "Can I go back upstairs?" Lincoln looked at his wife, who simply shrugged in response.

"Sure, buddy. You can go." Bobby gave a small nod and hopped down from his chair, silently hurrying out of the room. "Sorry…" Lincoln sighed softly, turning towards his niece. "Like I said… shy."

"It's… it's okay. I am, too." She muttered.

_**Yeah, no shit.** _

"He, um… he looks a lot like you. Both of you, I mean." Loan continued, pushing her thoughts aside.

"Yeah, but he takes more after his father… he's a little dork." Ronnie sighed. "That boy needs to toughen up a bit or he's never gonna survive out there." Lincoln just rolled his eyes; Ronnie may have mellowed out as she got older, but some things would just never change.

"Give him time, Ronnie." Lincoln chastised his wife.

"Just saying, you coddle him too much." Ronnie huffed. "You know how kids are… he's going to get bullied, I'm telling you."

"Well…" Lincoln began with a coy smirk. "Who knows? Maybe he'll end up marrying one of them." That made a faint blush creep along Ronnie's cheeks.

"Oh, stop." She mumbled, giving her husband a playful punch on the arm, and he grabbed his arm and groaned in exaggerated, mock pain.

"Ow! I've been wounded! How will I draw now?" Lincoln whined. "See, Loan? She's downright wicked…" Lincoln trailed off as he noticed Loan was staring at them with a half-lidded, wistful expression. "Uh… Loan?"

"Huh… oh!" Loan suddenly shot up straight and stared down at her lap, her face turning bright red. "S-sorry… I was just thinking, Bobby's a lucky kid." Loan bit her lip slightly. "It… must be nice."

Lincoln's expression grew sympathetic. He opened his mouth to speak, but suddenly the doorbell rang, making Loan jump.

Lincoln sighed, getting to his feet. "I'll get it… be back in a sec." As Lincoln left the room, Ronnie noticed that Loan had begun rapidly tapping her finger against the table, an anxious look crossing her face.

"Loan?" Ronnie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Everything okay…?"

"Y-yeah…" Loan mumbled quietly. "Yeah, I'm fine…"

Lincoln grumbled under his breath as he approached the door. It was 8:30… who would be disrupting them at this hour?  _Probably a late delivery,_  he figured. After all, Ronnie was always ordering God-knows-what off Amazon. Lincoln unlocked the door and swung it open. "Hel-"

" _Hello, Lincoln._ "

Lincoln's heart plummeted into his stomach. There she was, standing before him with her arms crossed over her chest, her lips pursed tightly in irritation, her blue eyes fixed directly on him in a cold glare. Her large perm was long gone, her hair pulled back into a neat ponytail. She was smartly dressed in a white blouse collared with a string tie, a straight black skirt that stopped a few inches above her knees, and black stockings ending in a pair of expensive-looking black heels. Even though she was pushing forty, she was still a very attractive woman… clearly, she took very good care of herself. And yet, all of that was completely negated by the icy, no-nonsense demeanor that seemed to radiate from her very being.

"L-Lori." Lincoln gasped. "Um… what brings you here…?"

"Spare me the bullshit, Lincoln." Lori scoffed, pushing her way past him. "Where is she?"

"How did you-"

"Luna." She answered plainly. Lincoln clicked his tongue in frustration; he couldn't believe Luna had gone behind his back like this, though at some level he couldn't really blame her. "Now, I'm not going to ask again.  _Where is she?_ "

"Long time no see,  _murderer._ " Lincoln buried his face in his palm. Not this. Not  _now._

Ronnie stood in the dining room doorway, glaring at the woman before her with palpable hatred in her eyes.

"…Ronnie." Lori replied with a curt nod. "You look well."

"As do you," Ronnie said, making no attempt to hide the venom in her voice. "I guess you're not losing any sleep, huh?"

Lori noticeably bristled at her sister-in-law's comment, but nonetheless remained stoic. "I'm just here for my daughter, Ronnie."

"It's  _Ronalda_ to you." Ronnie snapped. "You have some nerve-"

"Honey,  _please._ " Lincoln pleaded with his wife. "Not now." Ronnie locked eyes with her husband, before glaring at Lori once more. Finally, she turned away with a huff.

"The only reason you're not picking your fucking teeth off the ground is because your daughter's here,  _puta._ " She hissed, then without another word she stormed off. Lori watched her leave with a look in her eyes that Lincoln couldn't quite place.

"Lori, listen-"

" _Save it,_ Lincoln. Where- ah.  _There_ you are." Lori said as she spotted her daughter in the dining room.

"M-mom…" Loan shrunk back, a low whine escaping her throat. Lori strode into the room, making her daughter back up against the table.

_**I told you to turn back.** _

"I am  _very_  disappointed in you, Loan." Lori spoke in a stern, harsh tone, causing the girl to hunker down even further. It was a far cry from the simple bossiness she had exhibited as a teen… now, she seemed downright domineering. "What on earth were you thinking?! Do you have any idea how  _worried_  I've been?! God, look at you… you haven't even taken your medication, have you?"

"I-I… I, um…" Loan stammered, finding herself unable to look her mother in the eye. Her hands gripped the lip of the table so hard that her knuckles turned white.

"Lori, please-"

"I said  _save it,_ Lincoln!" Lori snapped, before turning back to the frightened girl before her. "Grab your things, Loan. We're  _leaving._ And suffice to say, we are going to have a  _very_  long talk when we get home."

"I… I… um… I…" Loan whimpered; even without looking at her, she could feel her mother's icy glare piercing right through her soul.

_**Do it, Loan. Run to mommy. Beg for forgiveness.** _

_**Give up.** _

Loan swallowed, clenching her teeth. "…No."

Lori's brow furrowed. " _Excuse_ me?"

"N-no." Loan repeated, forcing herself to meet her mother's gaze. "I'm not… I'm not going."

_**Well now… look at you.** _

Lori narrowed her eyes. "…You don't have a choice in the matter."

"I'm not going…!" Loan snapped. "I don't  _want_ to!"

"It doesn't matter if you want to or not, Loan. We are  _leaving._ End of discussion."

" _NO!_ "

"Lori-"

"Stay  _out_ of it, Lincoln!" Lori shouted, striding towards her daughter and grabbing her roughly by the arm. "We. Are.  _Leaving!_ "

Loan froze, her breaths becoming short and ragged. She let out a weak, shuddering whimper as tears began to pool in her eyes. "L-let go…  _LET GO!_ " She shrieked, struggling in vain against her mother's grip. She desperately looked to her Uncle, the panic evident on her face.

Silently begging him to save her.

" _Let her go!_ " Lincoln roared, grabbing his sister by the wrist and pulling her off of Loan. She gasped, whether from shock or pain, he did not know… quite frankly, he didn't  _care._ He glared at Lori with fury in his eyes, his teeth clenched together in anger. Lori returned his glare for a brief moment before shrinking down under his gaze; this was no longer the little boy she had known. He seemed to tower above her now, dominant and unyielding. "If you so much as lay a single finger on her, I swear to  _God_  I will lay you right the fuck out myself."

"…This doesn't concern you, Lincoln." Lori said in as assertive of a tone as she could muster. "Stay out of it."

"I will  _not_ stay out of it. Not anymore." Lincoln spat, his grip on his sister's wrist tightening and making her wince.

"Y-you're hurting me…"

"Like you hurt  _her?!_ "

Any resolve left in Lori seemed to fade away in an instant. Her face fell, her brow furrowing slightly. "I… I don't…"

"U-Uncle Lincoln…" Loan whimpered. "Please…"

"It's okay, Loan." Lincoln assured her, his tone even and gentle. "It's going to be okay. Just… give us a bit, okay…?" Loan opened her mouth to speak, then quickly shut it. She gave a small, almost imperceptible nod before shuffling out of the room. Lincoln fixed his harsh gaze back on Lori before letting go of her wrist. "You and I need to talk."

Lori frowned, rubbing her sore wrist. "…Yes. Yes, I suppose we do."

 

* * *

 

The night air was crisp, yet not uncomfortably so. There was an uncomfortable silence as Lincoln and his estranged sister sat at a table on the back porch, both faced straight ahead; out of the corner of his eye, Lincoln could see that Lori was still rubbing her wrist. He let out a small sigh, mentally cursing himself for his concern… even now, she was still his sister. "…Sorry." He grumbled.

"It's… fine." Lori said curtly. Again, there were several moments of silence before Lori spoke. "…You had no right trying to keep her from me."

"Yes, I did." Lincoln replied in a serious tone.

"She's  _my_  daughter."

"She's an  _adult._ " Lincoln countered. "If she doesn't want to leave, you can't force her."

"Yes, I can." His sister scoffed. "As I'm sure you've noticed, Loan is a very…  _troubled_  girl. She can't make her own decisions."

Lincoln frowned, grasping his hands together between his knees. There was no doubt that Loan was a bit… uneven. But even so… "…Lori." He began. "Why does she flinch?"

A deep frown crossed Lori's face. "As I said… Loan is very troubled-"

"Cut the  _bullshit,_ Lori!" Lincoln shouted, pounding on the table in anger. "Why does she  _flinch?!_ " Lori visibly tensed up, but he pressed on. "If you've been hitting her-"

"I  _haven't!_ " Lori snapped. "Not… not anymore." She added, barely above a whisper.

Lincoln's eyes narrowed as he glared at his sister. "Explain." Lori took a deep breath, shutting her eyes.

"I… I used to drink." His sister admitted. "Sometimes… I would lash out."

"You-"

"I  _stopped._ " She insisted. "That was ages ago. I… haven't had a drop of alcohol in over eight years."

"You think that makes it  _better?!_ " Lincoln hissed. Lori simply bit her lip, shaking her head sadly.

"No… no, of course not." She said quietly. "I can never excuse myself for what I did. But I swear to you… I haven't laid a hand on her since. I  _love_  her, regardless of what you may think."

Lincoln sucked his teeth in thought; he had to admit, she  _did_ sound sincere. She'd been strict and forceful with her daughter, but he wouldn't go so far as to say she'd actively  _hurt_  her. And if she'd stopped drinking eight years ago… that would have been before he'd seen Loan last. Thinking back, he could vaguely recall Lori turning down a drink at the party.

"What  _happened_ to her, then?" He asked. "She wasn't like this before." Lori's face contorted in pain, and she hunched forward, resting her elbows on her knees.

"I…" Lori's voice caught in her throat, and she took a moment to calm herself. "Do you remember Chester?"

"Chester…?" Lincoln wracked his brain for a few moments. He remembered that there had been a man with Lori at the party… a large, barrel-chested man with blonde hair and a booming laugh. They'd only recently started dating, and he seemed nice enough… though Lincoln barely spoke to him beyond a simple introduction. "Yeah… yeah, I think so."

"He... um…" Lori swallowed, glancing off to the side. She shut her eyes, taking a deep breath before continuing. "He would go to Loan's room at night."

Lincoln's blood ran cold. " _…What?_ " He managed to gasp out; Lori bit her lip and gave a small nod.

"I didn't know… I swear to  _God_ I didn't know. To this day, I've never forgiven myself for not noticing how she'd  _changed…_ the way she'd act around him. The way she'd act around  _me._ It had been going on for nearly  _two years_  before I caught him in the act, and even that was just by  _chance._ "

"Oh, God, Lori…"

"We couldn't even have the son of a bitch put away. There was no evidence… it was our word against his. And Loan… Loan wouldn't talk." Lori said quietly. "She was broken. That man  _broke_ my daughter, and he just… he just  _walked._ "

Lincoln clenched his jaw shut, taking in everything Lori had just said. He regretted jumping to conclusions so quickly… talking to her now, it was clear that Lori loved her daughter. "…I'm sorry."

"Since then, I've done all I can to protect her," Lori explained. "I know I can be overbearing, but… she just can't function on her own. I  _tried,_  Lincoln." Lori looked to her brother, and he couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy as he noticed the tears in her eyes. "I  _tried._  I tried to get her help, I tried to bring her out of her shell… I even got her into the best university I could manage. But she… she just couldn't."

Lincoln drummed his fingers against the table in thought. "I've… been talking to her, Lori. I don't think she's broken… I think she can get better. I think she  _wants_  to get better."

"Of  _course_ she  _wants_  to, Lincoln." Lori sighed. "But it's not that easy. Those kinds of scars… they don't go away…" Lori looked at her brother with an expression that he couldn't quite place… as though she were searching his eyes for something. After a moment, she turned away with her hand clenched over her mouth.

Lincoln chewed his lip, averting his eyes. There was still something about all this that wasn't clear. "Why did she run away, then?"

"We had a disagreement." Lori said, wiping the tears from her eyes. "I was offered a… a position overseas. At my company's Tokyo branch."

"Tokyo…  _Japan?!_ "

"…Do you know any others?" Lori asked, shooting her brother an unimpressed glance. Lincoln coughed, sheepishly scratching his cheek.

"I-I guess not…"

"But, as you can imagine, Loan… she's not fond of the idea." Lori muttered. "So we had a bit of an… exchange, as it were."

"Can you  _blame_  her?" Lincoln asked. "Do you really expect her to be okay with just… leaving the  _country?_ "

"Well what am I supposed to  _do,_ Lincoln?!" Lori snapped. "I have to think of my career too! And what more can I do for her here?!" Lincoln opened his mouth to retort, but Lori continued. "She can't be on her own, Lincoln. She  _needs_ to be with me. And she likes all that…  _cartoon_  crap anyway… she could be happy there."

"You  _really_  think that?" Lincoln asked in an accusatory tone.

"Listen… this is a lucrative position.  _Highly_ lucrative," Lori emphasized. "She won't want for anything. She barely even leaves her room as it is… she can only be happier, Lincoln. There's no other option."

Lincoln sighed, resting his face in his palm. "…It's not right." He muttered quietly. "You can't just… force her to leave like that, Lori. She's not a child. She's a  _woman._ "

Lori scoffed, looking away from her brother. "…Stop acting like you know her."

"Well maybe I  _could_ have, if you hadn't shut me out!" Lincoln snapped, making his sister wince slightly. "I just… I don't  _get_ you, Lori! What  _happened_ to us? What the hell did I ever do to make you hate me?!" For some time, Lori didn't answer. She kept her eyes firmly planted on a bird house hanging from a nearby tree, her hands trembling slightly in her lap.

"I… I never hated you, Lincoln."

 

* * *

 

Loan sat on the couch, nervously wringing her hands. Quite frankly, she didn't know what Lincoln hoped to gain from talking to her mom… she knew that no matter what, she would be forced to leave.

_**Not that they wanted you here at all.** _

Still, the way her Uncle had stood up for her… it made her happy. Nobody had ever stood up for her like that except Aunt Luna… and never to  _that_  extent. She was worried that he may attack her mother. She didn't want him to do that, but the fact that he would have been  _willing_  to for her sake… made her feel something she hadn't felt in years.

_Safe._

Loan loved her mother… she really did. She knew that everything her mother did was for her sake. Her mother gave her so much, provided her with a roof over her head, given her everything she ever wanted. Well…  _almost_  everything, anyway.

But leaving her home… moving to another country… that was something Loan couldn't bear. She barely even managed as it was… she could barely even walk to the corner store without psyching herself up for several minutes beforehand. As much as she'd love to visit Japan someday, she couldn't live there.

_**Too fucking bad. You're going to.** _

"You alright?" Loan jumped as Ronnie's voice snapped her from her thoughts; Ronnie wore a sympathetic frown as she looked at the troubled girl before her.

Loan took a deep breath to calm herself down before answering. "As… as well as I could be, I guess…" Ronnie simply nodded in understanding.

"Look… let me tell you something about my husband," Ronnie began, taking a seat beside her niece. Loan shifted over slightly. "There's nothing that matters to him as much as family. I guarantee you that he's doing everything he can to fight for your sake." Loan simply bit her lip and gave a small nod; she believed Ronnie, of course.

_**You know damn well it won't amount to anything.** _

"Hey…" Ronnie said with a mischievous smirk. "You wanna listen in on them?"

"Huh…?" Loan hunkered down slightly, sheepishly twiddling her thumbs. "I-I, uh… I don't think we should…"

"Ah, lighten up," Ronnie said as she gave her niece a light slap on the back. Loan tensed up, but managed to keep from crying out; her Aunt seemed nice enough, after all. "C'mon. There's a window we could hear them through."

Loan chewed her lip and looked off to the side. In truth, she  _was_  curious… and hell, she was already in hot water with her mom. It's not like it could get any worse. "A-alright…" She muttered under her breath.

"C'mon, then," Ronnie said. "Over here." Her Aunt got up and beckoned the girl to follow her, which she did somewhat reluctantly. As she followed Ronnie into the master bedroom, she couldn't help but feel slightly unusual being in someone else's room. Hell, she'd never even been in her  _mother's_ bedroom.

"Over here." Ronnie gestured to a window along the back wall. It looked out onto the patio, and if they stood off to the side they wouldn't be spotted. Loan shuffled to her aunt's side uncomfortably, and Ronnie put a finger in front of her lips to signal her to keep quiet… not that she needed to be told. As quietly as she could, Ronnie slid open the window halfway.

"…ever hated you, Lincoln," They heard Lori say.

 

* * *

 

"Then why?" Lincoln asked quietly. "Why did you just turn your back on me…?" Lori's brow furrowed and she clenched her jaw as she heard the pain in his voice. He'd only been twelve when she'd cut off contact with him… just a child.

…Just a  _child._

"I…" Lori began, her voice cracking slightly. "…I can't say…"

"Why  _not,_ Lori?!"

"I just can't, Lincoln." Lori whispered. "Please… just let me take my daughter and go." Lincoln heard no anger in her voice… no frustration. It sounded as though she were  _begging_  him to drop this.

He wouldn't.

With a small sigh, Lincoln got to his feet and paced a few steps away, his hands jammed into his pockets. "I loved you, you know." He said. "I still do, even now. Even after… you just kicked me aside."

"I wasn't-"

"I came to terms with it. I accepted it. But… it never stopped hurting." Lincoln paused a moment, taking a deep breath through his nose, and then turned around to look at his sister with a serious expression. "I want to know  _why,_ Lori. You owe me that much, at least."

Lori's face scrunched up in turmoil. For over a minute, she didn't say anything… nor did her brother look away from her. Those blue eyes, begging her for an answer. "I…" She began, her voice hitching in her throat. "I love you too. I loved you then, I love you now… more than I could ever say. That's… that's why I had to keep away from you. I… needed to protect you." Her voice was quiet, wavering…  _weak,_  as though merely speaking the words caused her physical pain. "I needed to protect  _both_ of you."

For a moment, the heartache in his sister's voice almost made him consider dropping the subject. He wasn't sure why, but that last bit had pierced right through to his very soul. He was almost  _afraid_  to push forward, but… something pressed him onward. He swallowed the lump in his throat. "What, um…" Lincoln paused, running his tongue across his lips. "What do you mean,  _both_ of you…?"

"Lincoln,  _please-_ "

"What do you _mean,_  Lori?!" Lincoln snapped.

Lori's face twisted up in a mess of fear, sorrow, and regret. Her brother could see the tears welling up in her eyes, her nostril's flaring with heavy breaths, her lower lip trembling as she bit down on it… but he had to know. He  _needed_ to know.

And close nearby… Loan felt she needed to know, too.

"D-do you…" Lori shut her eyes, trying in vain to force back the tears. "Do you remember the night before I went to college…?"

Lincoln frowned slightly as he thought back. "You… went to a party." He realized then that  _that_  must have been the party where she'd cheated on Bobby.

"A-after that."

_After_ that? He'd been asleep. He couldn't have-

…Wait.

 

" _Heeey, Linkyyy~!"_

" _Nnn… Lori… what're you…?"_

 

"You… came into my room…" He muttered. "You were drunk, right?"

Lori's face scrunched up even further, the tears beginning to flow freely from her cheeks. All she could do was give a small nod. Lincoln furrowed his brow, his mouth hanging open slightly as he struggled to remember more. He could vaguely recall her crying to him about something…

 

" _Move overrr Linky…"_

" _Alright, alright… geeze."_

 

Lincoln could feel something squeezing down on his heart. Something was wrong. Something was  _very_ wrong.

 

" _You're literally shooo undershtanding, Linky… why can't aaaalll guys be like you…?"_

" _Lori, knock it off… just go to sleep, okay?"_

_"C'mooon... yer my shpeshul lil' guy..._

 

"L-Lori…" Lincoln wheezed, his throat suddenly feeling very dry.

"I… I didn't mean for it to happen, Lincoln…" She whimpered, half her face hidden in her palm.

 

" _Lori… what're you doing…?"_

" _Sssshhhh… don't woooorry about it, little bro…"_

 

"I swear to  _God_  Lincoln, I don't even remember  _doing_ it…" Lincoln wasn't listening. His breaths were growing short, his heart beating in his chest as it started to come back to him.

"Lori… Lori, t-that was just a dream. It… it didn't  _happen._ "

 

" _Ohhh fuck, Lincoln~!"_

" _L-Lori… Lori,_ _stop...!"_

 

"Lori… that was a  _dream._ It was a fucking  _dream,_ right?!" Lincoln asked, or, rather,  _begged_  his sister. She simply shook her head, her body rattling with sobs.

 

" _There, see~? That's right… that's right, you_ _love_   _it…!"_

" _O-oh my God…"_

 

"I'm sorry… I-I'm  _so_  sorry, Lincoln…"

Lincoln couldn't breathe. He could barely  _think._  It was all returning to him, now… the memory that had been buried within him for so long. He'd chalked it up to a dream at the time… some strange  _fantasy_  that had popped into his mind at the cusp of puberty. But now, he could see it clearly. He could see Lori coming into his room, slurring her speech. He could smell the alcohol on her breath. He could feel her tears on his face, then her warmth as she got into bed beside him.

Her soft, slender fingers tracing their way down his stomach.

His nude sister, writhing in ecstasy above him.

Lincoln clamped a hand over his mouth. He felt like he was going to be sick. That had been right before his sister had left for college… just over twenty-one years ago.

Roughly a month before they'd received the news that she was pregnant.

"O-oh. Oh my God… what the fuck…" He stammered, his eyes wide and full of horror. "What the  _fuck,_ Lori…"

"She's  _yours,_  Lincoln." Lori choked. "Loan… she's  _yours._ "


	2. Sins of the Past, Hope for the Future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this one certainly took a while, and I'm sorry for the wait.
> 
> In a very short amount of time, my fics have received far more attention than I'm used to (on FF.net at least)... I'm immensely grateful to those who have commented, favorited and followed, as well as those who simply read my works without doing any of the above. I hope I can continue to live up to your expectations.
> 
> Also, I'll be answering some of the questions I've gotten at the end of this chapter, which I'll continue to do as long as I get questions I can answer. (NOTE THAT THESE COMMENTS COME FROM FANFICTION.NET)
> 
> Now, a quick WARNING: The first part of this chapter may be a bit... intense for some. If you're easily offended by depictions of sexual assault, you can skip that part without missing a whole lot.
> 
> Please enjoy the continuing tale of Loan Loud!

It was just past one in the morning when Carol Pingrey's car pulled up to 1216 Franklin Avenue. In truth, she was probably just a  _little_ too tipsy to be driving, but she'd managed just fine… besides,  _someone_  needed to take her friend home, and there was no chance in hell she was going to trust any of the boys that had offered. Not when she was in  _this_ state. "Alright, Lori," She sighed. "We're here. Go sleep this off, okay?"

"Fffffuck you, Carol…" Lori slurred as she sat in the passenger's seat, pouting childishly. "Cut  _me_ off? I'll cut  _you_ off… dumb little… blonde!" Carol simply rolled her eyes; as much as Lori pretended to be mature for her age, she knew fully well that tonight was the first time her friend had tasted so much as a  _drop_  of booze. It was absurd how quickly she'd gotten wasted, too… just minutes after her first shot of whisky, she had already begun slurring her words. The five others she'd had after that did nothing to help matters, nor did the two beers she'd had after  _that._ Once she started grabbing random boys by the crotch, Carol knew it was time to get the girl home.

"Yes, I know, I'm a bitch." Carol replied sarcastically as she reached over and released Lori's seatbelt for her. "Go on, now. You've got a long trip in the morning, remember?"

"…Oh yeeeahhh!" Lori giggled for no reason in particular. "I goin'a…  _college! WOO!_ " She threw her hands up in celebration, smacking them against the roof of Carol's car. Carol groaned and put her car in park before getting out and walking around to the passenger side. Normally, Lori was a pretty responsible girl, but Carol could hardly blame her for wanting to celebrate a bit… after all, come tomorrow she would be starting a whole new chapter in life.

Lori practically flopped right out of her seat when her friend opened the door, and Carol needed to hoist her to her feet, using her shoulder to support the drunk girl. "Alright… c'mon, Lori. Let's get you inside." She half-dragged her friend to the door, taking the keys from her purse and unlocking it for her. "You go sleep this off, okay?"

"Don't tell me what to do, Carrrol…" Lori grunted, yanking her purse out of her friend's grasp. "Little fuckin'… goody-two-shhhhoes…" Carol rolled her eyes.

"Love you too, Lori. You take care of yourself, okay?"

"Whateverrr…" Lori huffed, shutting the door; thankfully, even in her inebriated state she knew better than to slam it. The house was dark and quiet, which made sense considering the late hour.

Lori lurched her way up the stairs, nearly falling more than once. Quite frankly, she was too wired to go to sleep, even if she  _did_ have a long drive in the morning… she wanted to stay up. She wanted to keep  _drinking._  She'd never felt so giddy in her life, and she wanted to enjoy it for as long as possible.

She paused at the top of the stairs, teetering back and forth unsteadily. She nearly fell backwards down the staircase, but thankfully managed to catch herself on the banister. "Oopshiesh…" She giggled drunkenly before another hiccup escaped her throat. She shambled her way down the hall, making it all the way to Lincoln's door before realizing she'd gone the wrong way. Although, as long as she was here… she may as well check in on her little brother, right?

"Heeey, Linkyyy~!" Lori drawled cheerfully as she entered, not even bothering to knock. Lincoln groaned, shifting at the sudden intrusion.

"Nnn…" He grunted as he leaned up slightly, blinking the sleep out of his eyes as he glanced at his visitor. "Lori…" He muttered as the blurry shape of his sister came into focus. "What're you…?"

"I wanted to shee you, Linky!" Lori staggered over to her brother's bed and slumped over onto it, dropping her purse along the way. "How're ya doooin'?"

Lincoln sighed, glancing over at his clock. "Lori, do you have any idea what time it is…?" He mumbled, making no attempt to hide the irritation in his voice.

"Psssh…" Lori scoffed, waving her hand dismissively. "Who caresh about that?" Lincoln covered his nose and mouth, letting out a small cough; even he could recognize the overbearing smell of alcohol on her breath.

" _I_ do." Lincoln huffed before turning onto his side. "Go to bed, Lori. You're drunk." Lori frowned at her little brother's indifference.

"But, Linkyyy…" She sniffed. "I'm gonna mish youuu…" Lincoln bristled slightly. It was still hard to believe that come tomorrow, Lori wouldn't be around anymore; she'd quite literally been in his life since he was born. Their relationship had always been a bit unusual… in many ways she was the sister he was closest with, and yet she was also the one he butted heads with the most often. She could be bossy, overbearing, and downright  _mean_  at times, but he knew she meant well. He'd never admit it out loud, but Lori was like a second mother to him… and  _she'd_ never admit it out loud, but Lincoln was like the son she hoped she'd have in the future.

"…I'm gonna miss you too, Lori." Lincoln said quietly.

"No yer noooooot!" Lori whined. "Y'hate me juuuus like erryone elsh…" Lincoln winced as he heard her begin sobbing softly. He knew it was just the alcohol making her emotional… but still, he could never bear to see one of his sisters cry.

"I don't hate you, Lori… I love you. We all do." With a sigh, he rolled over to face her. "C'mere," He said as he held his arms open for a hug. Lori immediately threw herself onto him, awkwardly embracing him and blubbering inelegantly into his chest.

"I'mma jus' mish ya soooo much…!" Lori bawled. Lincoln rolled his eyes, gently patting his big sister's back.

"There, there. It's alright." Lincoln muttered in as soothing of a voice as he could muster, given the late hour. "I'll still call… and you're only gonna be three hours away. We can see each other whenever, right?" Lori sniffled, wiping at her damp eyes.

"I-I guesh…" Lori mumbled, hugging him a bit tighter. "…Y'give th' besht hugs, y'know that…? Yer like…  _hugman._ "

"Uh… good to know, I guess. You alright now?

Lori gave a small nod. She pulled out of the hug, glancing down at her younger brother. It was kind of jarring to the drunken girl just how much he had grown under the years. She'd never really noticed before, but he was getting taller, his features more defined. "Yer growin' too fasht, Linky…" She slurred. "Ushed ta hold ya when y'were jus' a lil' baaaby…"

"Yes, Lori. I know." Lincoln yawned. Lori stared at him with half-lidded eyes, her head teetering back and forth slightly; for some time, neither said anything. "Ssssoooo…" Lincoln coughed, averting his eyes. "You… gonna go to bed?" Lori snapped out of her daze.

"O-oh… yeah…" Lori gave him a little shove. "Move overrr, Linky…" She mumbled.

"Alright, alright… geeze." Lincoln groaned and scooted aside. "As long as you  _sleep_ , okay?" Lori giggled and slid under the covers beside him. She fidgeted around for a moment, before kicking her shoes out to the floor. Lincoln simply sighed, rolling back onto his side. "Goodnight, Lori."

Lori rolled onto her side and wrapped her arm around Lincoln, hugging him tightly against her chest. She gave him a sloppy kiss on the cheek. "You're literally shooo undershtanding, Linky… why can't aaaalll guys be like you…?" Lincoln blushed slightly and squirmed in her grip. He could feel something soft pressing against his back…  _two_ somethings, in fact. He'd shared a bed with Lori in the past, but he was twelve now, and things were starting to get…  _awkward._

"Lori, knock it off… just go to sleep, okay?" He grunted.

"C'mooon…" She cooed. "Yer my shpeshul lil' guy…" Lori only hugged him tighter, nuzzling her face into his hair. "We neverrr talk no more, Linky… what'sh been goin' on? Any giiirlfriends?"

"…No." Lincoln let out a small sigh; clearly, she wasn't going to be a cooperative bedmate tonight. Still, he wasn't about to kick her out, so he figured he may as well play along until she conked out. "So… how was the party?" Lincoln asked.

"Th'  _besht!_ " She exclaimed a little too loudly, making her brother flinch. "Booze ish like,  _literally_  th' besht. Yer gonna love it."

"Y-yeah… I bet." Lincoln muttered. He sincerely hoped he'd never get  _this_ bad, but then again his parents were hardly any different than Lori. Perhaps it just ran in the family.

"Shtupid Carol…" Lori grumbled. "Tellin' me I had enough… s'right I've had enough… enough of lil' missh…  _perfect!_ "

"Pretty sure that's called being a good friend, Lori." Her brother replied. "You're kind of a mess."

"Never been better," Lori scoffed. "Shtoppin' me jus' 'cause I was grabbin' on some dudes…"

Lincoln cocked an eyebrow. "You… what, now?"

"Jus' havin' some fun!" Lori complained. "But noooo, 'pparently that'sh  _such_  a problem…"

"I don't think Bobby would like that, Lori…" Lincoln said quietly. Lori frowned.

"What, y'gonna tell on me?"

"No…" Lincoln muttered. "Just saying… that's kinda messed up, y'know?"

"Oh, come  _on,_ Lincoln… don't mean nuffin'. Jus' a little…" Suddenly, Lori reached down and cupped her little brother's junk, giving it a gentle squeeze. Lincoln yelped, swatting her hand away and scrambling free from her grasp. He backed up against the wall, staring at his sister with wide eyes.

"What the  _hell,_ Lori?!" Lincoln snapped, his face red as a tomato. "Don't  _do_ that!"

"Oh, shtop bein' sucha baby…" Lori giggled. "That was nuffin'."

"I-it wasn't nothing!" Lincoln stammered. "It was something! It was a very big something!"

"Well, I wouldn' shay  _very_  big…" Lori teased. Lincoln just stared at her in horror; nobody had ever touched him there before… let alone one of his  _sisters._ He took a deep breath to calm his nerves.  _She's drunk,_ he reminded himself.  _She doesn't know what she's doing._

"…I think you should go sleep in your own room, Lori." Lincoln huffed. Lori's face fell slightly.

"Noooo, c'mooon…" She whined. "'M shorry, Lincoln… I won't do it again, okay? I jusssht really wanna shtay wif ya t'night…" She bit her lip slightly, looking as though she may cry again. Lincoln groaned, burying his face in his palm. Why,  _why_ did he have to be so caring?

" _Okay…_  okay, fine. But no more of  _that,_ " He said in a serious tone. "I mean it."

"I promishe… thank you, Linky~" She giggled again. Lincoln rolled his eyes and lay back down beside her. Once again, she hugged him close to her chest. He figured it best not to fight her on this… besides, he had to admit that being held like this was kind of comforting; doubly so when Lori began idly stroking his stomach. Soon, he found himself growing drowsy.

Lori, however, wore a mischievous smirk on her face. She knew what she'd felt… the slight  _stiffness_  of her brother's 'little friend'. He really  _had_ grown, hadn't he? It felt like just yesterday that she was changing the boy's diapers. And now, he was already starting to become a man.

Lori hiccupped again. She'd  _wanted_ a man tonight. Lori had always been faithful to Bobby, but, well, she was drunk. On top of that, she was a bit mad at the boy for not making it out to the party. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew this was unfair to him… he had been busy preparing things for her arrival, after all. But, again… drunk.

Lori's smirk only deepened as she ran her fingers across Lincoln's taut stomach; she could feel the faintest hint of developing abs through his skin. In her inebriated state, she stopped seeing him as her brother…

…Instead, she saw him as exactly what she'd been looking for.

Slowly, Lori slid her hand up his pajama top. Lincoln jumped as he felt her cool fingers graze his stomach. He turned his head slightly, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. "Lori… what're you doing…?"

"Sssshhhh… don't woooorry about it, little bro…" Lori cooed. Lincoln shuddered as his sister began tracing her fingers around his abs. It tickled a bit, but definitely felt good. Still… he couldn't deny it was making him a bit uncomfortable.

"Lori, knock it off…" Lincoln grumbled as he tried to pull her hand away, but she simply squeezed him a bit tighter. Lincoln could hear her giggle softly, realizing her mouth was right beside his head… and then, she gently bit his ear. " _Lori?!_ " Lincoln gasped, his cheeks going bright red. " _K-knock it off!_ " But Lori wasn't listening; she simply continued nibbling the young boy's ear, sliding her slender fingers down his belly.

And then, he felt her fingertips push past his waistband.

" _Lor-_ " Lincoln began, only to give a shocked yelp as his sister's hand wrapped around his most private area.

"Well, lookit that…" Lori said with a low chuckle. "Yer a lil' perv, ain'tcha? Gettin' all worked up over yer shishter…" Lincoln let out a strangled cry as she began to move her hand, her soft skin caressing him in a way he never could.

"L-Lori,  _stop…!_ " Lincoln hissed, trying in vain to pull the older girl's hand off of him; puberty or not, she was still far stronger than him.

"Relaaax… s'nice, right…?" Lori murmured in his ear.

"J-just… stop…" Lincoln whimpered. " _Please…_ I-I don't… want this…"

"Shure  _feelsh_ like y'do…" Lori teased. Lincoln squeezed his eyes shut as he began tearing up. It wasn't like he could help it… her hand  _did_ feel amazing. But he didn't want this. Not like  _this._

Not with  _Lori._

For her part, Lori couldn't help but delight in her brother's frightened gasps and moans. It reminded her of her first time with Bobby. The boy had been so nervous, he hadn't even been able to finish. Not that it stopped her… quite frankly, she'd found his reactions to her touch to be downright adorable; Lincoln's no less so.

But she wanted  _more._

Lincoln breathed a small sigh of relief as Lori released him, her hand sliding out of his pajama bottoms as she got out of bed. His heart was racing a mile a minute, his mind a confused mess of fear, disgust, and arousal. He turned around, only to find that Lori was pulling her shirt over her head, exposing her bra and sizable breasts. Lincoln's breath caught in his throat at the sight.

"Not bad, right…?" Lori said with a smirk. "Y'like 'em, don'tcha?" Lincoln swallowed hard, forcing himself to shake his head. "Psh… liar…" His sister scoffed, flicking her eyes down towards the boy's groin. Lincoln backed up against the wall, clasping his legs together to hide himself.

"Lori, please… no more…"

"C'mooon… we ain't even gotten t' the besht part…" Lori slurred as she clumsily unhooked her bra. Lincoln could only watch frozen in place as his sister bared herself for him. He wanted to scream, or run, or  _anything_  to get out of this situation… but he couldn't move.

Nor could he move when she slid down her shorts, followed by her panties.

Nor did he resist when she pulled him onto his back and forcibly pulled down his pajama bottoms.

But when she positioned her nude body above him, straddling his waist, something within him snapped awake; he sat upright and attempted to push her off, but she simply grabbed his wrists and forced him back down to the mattress. She looked down into her brother's desperate, frightened eyes with a hungry gaze.

"Lori,  _please._ " He croaked out in a quiet voice, his eyes beginning to well up with tears. "Y-you can't… for God's sake, I'm your  _brother…_ " For a brief moment, he saw his sister's expression falter slightly, and he pressed on. "Y-you have to stop. I won't tell anyone, I  _promise_ I won't…" Lori's brow furrowed, and for a moment it seemed as though she had come to her senses… only for her to hiccup again, followed by her lips spreading into a goofy, drunken grin.

"Y'need to lighten up, Linky…" And with that, she thrust her hips down. Lincoln's mind exploded. He threw his head back against the mattress, a shocked cry escaping his throat as little more than a dry wheeze.

" _Ohhh fuck, Lincoln~!_ " Lori gasped. Granted, he wasn't packing much yet, but she was too drunk to care. To her, all that mattered was that he was a man… or a  _boy,_ at least. In any case, he was  _enough._

"L-Lori…" Lincoln choked. "Lori,  _stop…!_ Ple-" His protests died in his throat as his big sister began to move, a whole new sensation taking over his body; it was hot, and wet, and  _incredible…_  he'd never felt so good in his life.

And yet, he just wanted it to  _end._

"No…" The young boy sobbed, desperately trying to push her off, but quite frankly he couldn't even muster up the strength to really  _try…_  it was like his body and mind were at war with each other. He was scared. He was excited. He wanted her to stop. He wanted her to keep going. He knew this was wrong. It felt so  _right._ He felt as though he were going mad; finally, he gave up, flopping back against the mattress and giving in to his fate. All he could do was squeeze his eyes shut, tears streaming freely down the side of his face. Then, he felt his sister's warm hand cupping his cheek.

Lincoln forced himself to look up at his sister, her blue eyes meeting his. She wore a gentle, caring smile… the kind he'd only rarely seen from her as she got older. "Don't cry, Lincoln…" Lori cooed softly, using her thumb to wipe away her brother's tears. "S'good, right…? Y'feel good…" The sincerity in her voice made Lincoln sick to his stomach. Even as her larger body undulated on top of his, she was being so gentle, so careful not to force her weight down upon him… so  _loving._ Somehow, that only made it worse.

The heat where his body met Lori's was overwhelming, as though their bodies were melting together. He couldn't help but let a small moan of pleasure escape his throat, much to his sister's delight.

"There, see~? That's right… that's right, you  _love_  it…!" Lori panted heavily as she found herself nearing her limit. Lincoln simply clenched his teeth together, turning his head away from the girl. He felt nothing but disgust and hatred… but not at her. Even now, he could never hate Lori. Rather, he hated  _himself._ He hated himself for letting this happen. He hated himself for not bolting out of the room when he had the chance. He hated himself because at some point, without even realizing it… his hands had come to a rest on his sister's hips.

He hated himself because Lori was  _right._

"O-oh my God…" Lincoln gasped as he felt a growing pressure below his abdomen. He'd touched himself before, but more out of curiosity than anything else… he'd never been able to finish. And yet, the change was so sudden, as though some sort of  _switch_ within his body had been flipped, that even  _he_ could tell what was happening. "L-Lori…!" Lincoln cried in desperation. " _Lori, stop!_ " But she wasn't listening. Even if she  _were,_ it was too late. An intense sensation overtook him, as though his entire body was suddenly hit with a jolt of electricity. His young mind couldn't handle it, and as his body went limp against the mattress, Lincoln passed out.

 

* * *

 

Lori awoke with a groan of pain, finding herself suffering from the worst headache of her life. " _Fffuck…_ " She hissed as she clutched her pounding head. Come to think of it,  _everything_  ached… from her head, to her stomach, to her entire body. She slowly pushed herself up slightly and opened her eyes, realizing that she wasn't in her own room. "Where…?" Lori muttered under her breath, blinking a few times to clear her blurry vision. She quickly recognized it as Lincoln's room.  _What happened last night…?_  She thought.

Lori glanced over at the clock: 5:02 AM. "Ugh…" Lori grunted, letting herself flop back down onto the bed… only to realize there was something solid beneath her. Lori's face scrunched up in confusion and she opened her eyes again, seeing the sleeping face of Lincoln before her; she had fallen asleep partially draped over the boy's torso. Lori couldn't help but chuckle under her breath. She had to admit, the little twerp looked downright adorable when he slept.

She shut her eyes tight, trying to remember what had happened last night. She could vaguely recall Carol driving her home… and she could remember going into Lincoln's room. Lori groaned again; she  _really_ must have been wasted to wake up her brother at such a late hour, let alone  _sleep_ with him. She'd have to remember to apologize later.

Lori shifted slightly, feeling an itchy sensation between her legs. She reached down to scratch herself, only to find that, to her confusion, she wasn't wearing any pants.

"What the  _fuck…?!_ " Lori snapped, bolting upright to a seated position, only to wince as the sudden movement caused another pang of pain in her head. She took a moment to let it die down, then opened her eyes and looked down at herself. Sure enough, she was completely nude. Lori's brow furrowed in confusion. Why the hell was she  _naked?!_

She dipped a hand between her legs, touching the spot that was causing her such discomfort. To her disgust, her fingers brushed against a dry, crusty substance. "Ew…" She muttered with a grimace. "The hell is this…?"  _Whatever_  it was, at least it flaked off easily… in any case, that still didn't answer why she was  _naked._ Lori glanced to her side; with the blanket thrown aside, she noticed that Lincoln's pajama bottoms were missing as well. " _Whoa!_ " She gasped, looking away quickly with a faint blush on her face.  _Well that was awkwa-_

… _Wait._

Lori forced herself to glance back over at her exposed brother. Then, back down at her naked body. She touched the dried spot again, before looking at her brother once more. Looking closely, she could faintly make out some whitish spots spattered across his thighs. Lori stared in silence for a long while, her mind struggling to put the pieces together… or rather,  _refusing_ to. Her heart rate gradually increased andher breaths became shallower and ragged as the reality of the situation began to set in. She desperately wracked her brain to remember what happened, in some vain hope that she might find some alternate explanation, but it was no use. The previous night's events were a blur… save for one horrible image. One brief moment of lucidity amongst the chaos:

Her little brother's tear-stricken face.

Lori threw herself away from the boy, clamping a hand over her mouth to stifle a scream of horror. Her eyes were wide as saucers, her pupils shrunken into tiny pinpricks. There was no denying what had happened, as much as she wanted to… as much as her mind told her that it was impossible, that she would  _never_  do something so awful. But she had. She  _knew_ she had.

She'd had sex with Lincoln. No… she'd  _raped_ him. She'd raped her own brother, barely even twelve years old.

"O-oh… oh my God…" Lori whimpered. Her stomach felt like it was twisting in knots, and her body began to heave as the bile started to rise up her throat. Lori scrambled out of bed and bolted out of the room, not even bothering to get dressed… there was no time. She darted down the hall and burst through the bathroom door, nearly making it to the toilet before her stomach lurched again. The teenager doubled over, splattering vomit across the floor and toilet lid. She barely managed to throw open the lid before the second heave sent her to her knees.

Wave after wave of puke surged from her mouth and nose between choked, anguished wails. The vile mixture of alcohol and half-digested party snacks soon gave way to pure bile that scoured her raw throat on the way out. For over fifteen minutes she knelt there, even long after the heaving had come to an end; her body still quaking with sobs and residual hiccups.

Lori still felt sick to her stomach, but not because she'd just thrown up. She'd done something  _beyond_  unforgivable, and to one of the most important people in her life no less. Part of her still refused to believe it… it was just far too absurd to be true. She couldn't even begin to imagine what would have led to such a scenario in the first place… he was her little brother, and never in her life had she seen him as anything more than that. No matter how drunk she had been, it was simply unfathomable that she could do something so heinous.

And yet, that singular image of Lincoln's face was burnt into her mind… he had looked so hurt, so scared, so  _heartbroken_  that it rocked her to her very core. An expression like that wasn't something she could have dreamed up. Combined with the other evidence, the truth was undeniable.

Lori sniffed, rolling up a wad of toilet paper and wiping her mouth and nose before dropping it into the commode. She'd made a mess of course, one she'd have to take care of before her siblings awoke. But right now, there were more pressing matters to attend to. Lori struggled to her feet, snatching her bathrobe off the hook and slipping it on.

Lori silently prayed that Lincoln hadn't awoken yet as she made her way back down the hall. Sure enough, he hadn't; he was still laying there fully exposed, and Lori mentally cursed herself for not at least pulling the blanket back over him. Usually, he was an incredibly light sleeper… the fact that he was so out of it now spoke volumes.

Lori stared at him in silence for a long while. It took everything she had in her not to start bawling again. He looked so peaceful now, as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened to him, but Lori knew better. She'd ruined him. She'd ruined  _everything…_ once the others found out, that would be it for her. Her life would effectively be over before it even truly began.

The young woman wiped the tears from her eyes and got to work, gathering her things as quietly as possible. Then came the tricky part: slipping Lincoln's pajama bottoms back on without rousing him. She knew all of this was in vain… she had no doubt Lincoln would tell everyone what she'd done. Still, if there was even the slightest chance that she could make it out of this, she had to try.

Before leaving the room, she took one last look at her brother. She loved him so much, even if she rarely admitted it. She bit her lip, her face scrunching up in pain; she knew she didn't deserve to get away with this unscathed. She knew attempting to do so was a selfish act… the most cowardly thing she'd ever done. But she  _was_ a coward. She always had been, she always would be, and deep down inside she  _knew_ this.

"I'm so sorry, Lincoln…" She whispered as she leant down and planted a gentle kiss on his forehead.

 

* * *

 

Lori sat at the kitchen table, a steaming mug of coffee clutched in her trembling hands. She hadn't even bothered to let it cool down a bit… each sip burnt her already-seared throat, but she didn't care. She needed this, not just for the hangover, but to keep herself awake.

"Daaamn, look at  _you._ "

Lori nearly jumped out of her seat. She glanced up to see Luna leaning against the door frame, smirking at her disheveled state. "Party a little too hard, dude?" She asked with obvious amusement in her tone.

"…Yeah." Lori grunted. Luna chuckled under her breath, walking to the coffee pot and pouring herself a cup.

"Yeah, the first one's always a doozy." Lori winced slightly at her sister's comment. She used to be slightly jealous of the younger girl for her partying lifestyle… but now? Not so much. "So…" Luna said as she sat down opposite her big sister. "Today's the big day, huh?" Lori said nothing, merely giving a small nod in response. "You excited?"

"Y-yeah… can't wait…"

Lori was barely listening as the rocker prattled on about how proud she was of her, how she was going to miss her, et cetera. Nor did she pay much attention when Lynn joined them, nor Luan. She did, however, take a moment to console a sobbing Leni… not that she had much choice when the girl had her wrapped in a rib-crushing hug. One by one her siblings joined her, and then their parents… even their pets came to see what all the commotion was.

Everyone but Lincoln.

Lori was vaguely aware of her father scolding her for ending up in such a state, and her mother defending her, claiming that she was no different at that age. At some point Lana and Lola began arguing over some undoubtedly petty bullshit. Shortly after that, Luan told a joke that earned her both laughter and groans in equal measure. It didn't matter to Lori; she wasn't processing any of it. She knew it was only a matter of time before Lincoln awoke and sealed her fate.

"Morning…" A sleepy voice said from the doorway, as if on cue. Lori tensed up, her fingers tightening around her mug. She forced herself to look up. Sure enough, Lincoln walked in stifling a yawn. "Did I miss-"

The moment their eyes met, Lincoln froze, his mouth hanging open slightly. Lori's heart stopped; this was it. This was end. She hung her head, waiting for the inevitable.

And then, Lincoln hugged her.

"Lori! I was worried I'd missed you!" Lincoln said cheerfully. Lori's eyes widened. Did he not remember? She forced herself to return the hug, albeit half-heartedly.

"No… still waiting on Bobby…" Lori muttered. As they broke off their hug, Lori noticed that he was blushing heavily. He scratched his arm, giving a nervous laugh.

"What's got  _you_ all worked up?" Lynn asked. Lincoln just blushed deeper, fidgeting awkwardly.

"Just… had a weird dream, that's all."

"A nightmare?!" Leni gasped. "Do you want to talk about it…?"

" _No!_ " Lincoln blurted out instantly, waving his hands wildly. "N-no, it's fine! Don't worry about it!"

Slowly, a sly smile spread across Luna's face. "Ooohhh… I get it. One of  _those_ kinda dreams, huh? Lil' bro's becoming a man!" Lincoln buried his face in his hands out of embarrassment, letting out a low groan. As the others snickered to themselves, Lori could only gape open-mouthed.

A dream.

He thought it was a  _dream._

Lori swallowed the lump in her throat, forcing a laugh alongside the rest of her family. She was safe. At least for now, she was in the clear.

And yet… she just couldn't feel relieved about that.

 

* * *

 

Lori sighed as she stepped through the door into the small studio apartment she shared with her boyfriend. She tossed her bag to the side, taking a moment to stretch; her spine made a faint  _pop_ she leaned back, much to her relief. She wasn't sure why college was taking such a toll on her as of late… quite frankly, she was enjoying it, though she did wish she could bypass the general education classes. She'd  _just_  finished high school, for crying out loud. Why in God's name did she have to take a science class if she was majoring in business?

Still, she was surprised by just how  _different_  college felt. In many ways it was far more laid-back than high school, yet at the same time it was far more stringent. What more, everyone seemed more mature… in high school, it felt as though the vast majority of students didn't give a shit, and in fact would go out of their way to break the rules whenever possible. Now, there was none of that. No snide comments, no delinquent behavior, nothing. It was a welcome change for the girl.

The first week had been easy enough, but the past two had been keeping Lori busy. So busy, in fact, that it was nearly enough to put Lincoln out of her mind. Hell, she'd even managed to come to terms with it to extent. While she still felt awful about what she'd done, it had been a one-time thing… and thus far, there had been no repercussions. Lincoln had called her just the other day to see how things were going, and he'd sounded downright chipper over the phone. It was as though that night had never happened.

Lori flopped down on the sofa. Just a few feet behind that was the bed; she'd never thought she would be living in a cramped apartment like this, but it had been the best they could afford. Aside from the main room, there were a small kitchen and a bathroom off to the side.  _Very_  small, to be precise… the bathroom was the worst part, with everything crammed into little more than a five-by-five foot space. The toilet, in particular, had an uncomfortable round seat as opposed to the usual oval. She could barely even sit on the damn thing, especially since she'd been putting on a bit of weight lately.

The young woman frowned as she poked at her bloated stomach. She hated it, but Bobby assured her that she was still sexy. If anything he seemed to  _enjoy_  the extra padding, which Lori found a bit odd, but to each their own. That said, she'd been even gassier than usual lately, much to her chagrin. She assumed this was all due to her terrible diet as of late. It wasn't like she'd ever learned to  _cook,_ and Bobby wasn't much better than she was… not to mention, he often worked late at the bodega, leaving Lori to either order out or scrape together something simple out of whatever was in the fridge.

Speaking of which… she was already feeling a bit peckish. Lori let out a grunt as she hoisted herself off the couch. Normally she wouldn't be eating this early, but she was hungry… she'd been hungry a  _lot_  lately, come to think of it. Then again, she figured the long walk home from the university would make anyone work up an appetite. What  _was_ weird was exactly  _what_  she had been eating… strange combinations of food, be it separately or together within a single dish. Although sometimes, there was little choice; right now, for example, the refrigerator was nearly cleared out.

Lori grumbled under her breath as she looked over the paltry offerings. There was peanut butter, regular butter, a nearly-empty carton of eggs that she knew she would overcook if she tried, some cold cuts that she was pretty sure had expired, a jug of milk she  _knew_ had expired, and a jar of sauerkraut.

Lori's eyes settled on the sauerkraut. For some reason, she was in the mood for something a bit sour… but that alone wouldn't be enough. She checked the plastic container of roast beef, and sure enough, it had expired. She briefly considered risking it, but the last thing she wanted was to spend all night on the toilet. With a sigh, she chucked it in the garbage along with the other cold cuts. Lori looked again to see if she had missed anything; to her frustration, she hadn't.

…Although.

Lori paused again, staring at the jar of peanut butter. The combination of the two had always been something that her little brother had sworn by, but she'd always found the mere thought of such a union to be too disgusting for words. But now?

Well, there's a first time for everything.

She snatched it up and set the two jars on the counter. Thankfully, they still had a few loaves of bread in the pantry. She opted to use sourdough, figuring it might be a good match… as good as one  _could_  be, at any rate. She wasn't sure how much of each ingredient she should use, so she simply went with her gut instinct: a healthy smear of peanut butter topped with a tablespoon of sauerkraut. She took her plate back out to the bed/living room and set it down on the coffee table.

Despite her hunger, she simply stared at the thing in silence for several minutes. She was already beginning to regret this decision… she'd been feeling somewhat nauseous lately, and she was certain that this would do little to help matters.

Then again… she couldn't afford to waste food, now could she?

Lori slowly raised the sandwich to her mouth. She hesitated briefly, biting her lip as she looked down at the bizarre concoction in her hand. Finally, she took a deep breath and forced herself to take a bite. To her surprise, it wasn't bad. It was quite good, in fact… the tart vinegar of the sauerkraut was balanced nicely by the smooth creaminess of the peanut butter, and as expected the sourdough bread worked nicely with the flavors. She took another bite, and then another. Lori leant back against the couch, picking up the remote and turning on the TV. There was nothing good on, but she didn't particularly care at the moment; she just needed something to  _do_ until Bobby got back.

The unmistakable  _ding_ of a text message rang out, and Lori set down her sandwich before fishing her phone out of her pocket. Sure enough, she'd received a text from Luna… a somewhat rare occurrence, to be sure.

 

**> hay gurl whatup?**

**Nm just chilling. U? <**

**> same**

**> hey u doin anything tmr?**

 

Lori frowned, thinking for a moment. Once, Saturdays had been her favorite day of the week… but now, not so much. Bobby worked most of the day, and quite frankly Lori still hadn't gotten used to the city life, so she mostly just stayed home bored and alone. And it's not like she could  _call_  Bobby, either… Hector had scolded him for using the phone during work hours.

 

**Not really, y? <**

**> got mystery a gig in the city**

**> *myself**

**> fkn autocorrect lol**

**> anyway was thinkin i could head up a bit early and come see ya?**

 

A small smile crossed Lori's face; she hadn't seen any of her family since she'd moved to the city. She'd considered driving down to visit them herself, before remembering that she still didn't have a car of her own.

 

**Sounds good, what time? <**

**> i guess noon or so idk i'm high**

 

Lori rolled her eyes. It came as little surprise to her that Luna would take advantage of her absence… the rocker had come home reeking of pot more than once, much to her frustration.

 

**Ur gonna get caught one of these days. Stop it <**

**> noh**

**> see u tmr dudette ;)**

 

Lori chuckled and set down her phone. It would be nice to catch up with her younger sister. Come to think of it, she'd never really hung out with Luna too often… they had very little in common, after all. Still, she loved her, and missed her just as much as the rest.

Well, except Leni. She  _really_  missed Leni.

 

* * *

 

"What is  _up,_ sis?!" Luna greeted her sister excitedly before giving her a big hug that Lori returned in kind.

"Hey, Luna… great to see you. C'mon-" Lori paused as a pungent, earthy scent filled her nostrils. She pulled away, and glared at her sister, now noticing the redness in her eyes. "…Seriously, Luna? Don't tell me you  _drove_ here..."

"Chill, dude…" Luna said with a small laugh. "Chunk drove me. He's visitin' some mates o' his while we're here. So what's goin' on?" She strode past Lori and into the apartment, a broad grin crossing her face. "Daaamn, get a load of this place! Nice crib, Lor'."

"It's literally a piece of junk," Lori sighed. "But it's the best we could do."

"Nah, I'm diggin' it. Nice and compact. Got a TV, a bed, and a crapper, what more d'you need?" Luna wasted no time in making herself at home; she flopped down across the couch, putting her feet up on the armrest. "So, how's college been treatin' ya?"

"Pretty good, I guess." Lori replied, taking a seat near her. "Bit stressful, but a hell of a lot better than high school was."

"No kidding?" Luna muttered. "Still, fuck that noise."

"You're not going to college?"

"Nah. Ain't got time for that." Luna said with a small shrug. "Me and Sam been talkin' bout startin' a proper band once we're outta school. Gonna call ourselves 'The Velvet Lips'."

Lori smirked. "Oh yeah? That's a cool na-" Then, she grimaced as the words sunk in. " _...Ew,_ Luna…"

Luna chuckled. "Sex sells, Lori.  _Anyway…_ " Luna swiveled around to a seated position. "How've things been going with Bobby? You two, ah…  _enjoying_  being on your own?" She asked, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively. Lori coughed into her fist, averting her eyes.

"…Do I really need to answer that?" She said quietly, to her sister's amusement. "Anyway, it's great… just wish he could be around more. Between work and classes, I barely get to see him some days."

"That's rough, dude…" Luna said with a small frown. "Still, he's doin' it for you, y'know?"

"I know, I know…" Lori sighed. "I just miss him is all."

"So, what? You pretty much go to class all day, then come home and loaf around 'till your boyfriend gets back?"

Lori raised an eyebrow. "How did you know…?"

"C'mon, Lori… y'don't get  _this_  from bein' active." She grabbed the hem of Lori's shirt and lifted it slightly, exposing her flabby belly. Lori yelped, quickly pulling her shirt back down.

" _Luna!_ " The flustered girl gasped in indignation. "I'm just a little bloated, okay?!"

"Suuuure you are." Luna teased. "And I'm straight."

"Alright,  _fine._ " Lori huffed. "I'm getting a bit fat. I'll deal with it. I've just been… hungry, lately. And tired."

"Hey, it ain't  _all_  bad…" Luna reached over and honked one of her sister's breasts. "Looks like you're puttin' some fat in the right places, too." Lori's face went beet red and she smacked Luna's hand away.

"S-stop that!" Lori pouted, crossing her arms over her chest. "…They're sensitive."

"Ohhh!" Luna exclaimed with a snap of her fingers. "I get it. That time of the month, huh?"

"No, not yet…" Lori grumbled.

"Um… ain't you usually due by now, dude?" Luna asked.

"Why do you know my cycle?"

The young rocker rolled her eyes. "C'mon, dude. We  _all_  know your cycle. Remember that time you tried to set Luan on fire?"

"…  _One_  time." Lori groaned, burying her face in her palm. "Anyway, it's literally just a few days off. It happens sometimes."

"…Uh- _huh._ " Luna glanced over to her side, drumming her fingers against her knee in thought. "Lori… you and Bobby have been using  _protection,_ right…?"

"Of  _course_  we have." Lori scoffed. "Do you think we're stupid?"

"No, of course not. I'm just saying…" Luna scratched her chin. "Are you  _sure?_ "

" _Yes,_ I'm sure!" Her sister shot back. " _Every_  time! What are you getting at, Luna?!"

"Have you taken a pregnancy test recently?"

"I-" Lori froze up; her eyes went wide, her brow furrowing in thought. She  _had_ been using protection with Bobby, yes…

…With  _Bobby._

"…Oh…" Lori croaked, bringing a hand to her mouth. "Oh, no…"

"H-hey… are you okay?" Luna asked softly. "Lori, are you-"

"I-I have to go." Lori said quickly, bolting to her feet.

"Lori?"

"I have to go," She repeated in a panicked tone as she fished her wallet out of her bag. "I need to go to the pharmacy,  _now._ " Without waiting for Luna, she hurried out the door.

"L-Lori! Lori, wait, up!" Luna cried out, scrambling after her sister. "You didn't even lock the door!"

 

* * *

 

Nine.

 _Nine_ pregnancy tests. All positive. Every single one, even the cheap ones. Lori sat on the toilet in a daze, staring aimlessly at nothing in particular. It still hadn't sunk in… it just didn't feel  _real_. She felt as though she were in a dream, trapped in some horrible, inescapable  _nightmare_. Her gaze slowly shifted over to the pile of tests on the counter. She reached out with a trembling hand, picked up one of the tests and looked at it again in some vain hope that it would have changed. But no… the strip still bore two lines, just as before. The young woman set the test down. She hoped against all hope that one of Bobby's condoms had been  _punctured_ somehow, but in her heart she already knew that wasn't the case.

Lori swallowed before shakily getting to her feet. She didn't really  _want_ to get up, but quite frankly the round toilet seat was starting to hurt her rear.

"Well…?" Luna asked as her big sister stepped out of the bathroom. Lori didn't need to say anything… the thousand-yard stare in her eyes spoke volumes. "Oh… oh, Lori…" She gasped. "Oh, Lori, no…"

Lori bit her lip, giving a small nod. "…Yeah." She said in a quiet, wavering voice. "I'm, um… you know... I'm… oh God… oh  _God,_ Luna…" Lori's voice started to crack as tears began to stream down her face. As Luna rushed forward to embrace her sister, Lori practically dove into the younger girl's arms. Tears soaked through Luna's shirt as Lori cried in her arms, wailing so loudly that she was certain the entire  _block_  could hear. She was actually shocked by just how extreme Lori's reaction was… the girl wasn't simply crying, she was  _screaming_  at the top of her lungs.

"H-hey… Lori, it's okay… it's all gonna be okay…" Luna cooed as she rubbed her sister's back.

"It's  _not_  okay!" Lori shrieked, making her little sister wince. "It's  _not_ okay, Luna! No part of this is fucking  _okay!_ "

"Lori… please…" Luna hissed in pain; Lori was squeezing her shoulders so hard that her fingernails nearly broke skin. "Try to calm down, okay…? Breathe. I'm here for you." Lori nodded, doing her best to breathe, but she was sobbing so hard that she could only choke on her own air. She let Luna lead her to the couch, her chest heaving rapidly; Luna had seen this kind of behavior before when one of her friends had tried LSD, much to Luna's disapproval. Lori was having a full-blown  _breakdown._  "You got tissues?"

" _N-n-ni-night-s-stand!_ " Lori managed to gasp out between sobs. Luna snatched the box of tissues off the nightstand and sat down beside her sister.

"Lori, you need to  _breathe,_ " Luna said softly as she dabbed at Lori's eyes; she was crying so hard that the tissues were simply tearing apart against her cheeks. "You're going to pass out."

"I-I can't… breathe…" Lori choked.

"Yes, you  _can._ " Luna insisted. "Come on, Lori… breathe in, breathe out." Lori swallowed before trying once more. She forced herself to inhale, and then exhale; he breaths came out as weak, shuddering gasps, but at least she was breathing. "It's going to be okay, Lori. It's all okay…"

"N-no…" Lori whimpered, hanging her head and pulling at her hair. "No no no no no no…" The distraught girl's tears were beginning to run out, and her throat was sore from all the screaming… but at least she was starting to calm down a bit.

"It's  _okay,_ Lori. This isn't the end of the world." Luna said as gently as she could. Quite frankly, she could hardly blame her sister for being so shaken… she couldn't even begin to imagine how she might feel in this kind of situation.

"Yes… yes it is…" Lori muttered, her voice fragmented and hoarse. "I-it's over, Luna… it's all over. I'm finished." Luna put her arm around the older girl's trembling shoulders.

"Look, Lori…" Luna sighed. "You don't… have to keep it, you know?" She could feel her sister tense up. "And even if you do… you and Bobby were always planning to have kids someday, right? It's a bit earlier than expected-"

" _No,_  Luna…" Lori sniffled. "Y-you don't understand… Bobby and I used protection.  _Every single time._ "

Luna frowned. "These things happen sometimes, Lori. You know that. Condoms can break." Lori bit her lip, shaking her head.

"It's… it's not Bobby's."

Luna's words died on her lips. She looked at Lori with a baffled, horrified expression. "It's… what…?" She murmured in shock; she couldn't believe what she was hearing. "You  _cheated_  on Bobby?!" Lori could only look away in shame, or rather,  _self-loathing._ Luna shook her head in disbelief, leaning back against the sofa. "Holy  _shit,_ Lori… how could… how could you do that?!  _Why_ would you do that?!"

"I-I never meant to…!" Lori cried. "I was drunk, I… I never…" Her words were interrupted by a sudden, intense bout of coughing. Luna rubbed the girl's back as she lurched forward, her body rattling with each wheeze.

"E-easy, Lori… easy." The rocker said in as soothing of a tone as she could muster. She couldn't deny that she felt somewhat angry with her sister, but seeing her in such a distraught state pained her nonetheless. Besides, at some level she could understand. Lord knows she'd done some crazy shit at her first few parties. "Do you, um… do you know who it was?"

Lori's face scrunched up in anguish. Her heart was pounding rapidly and her chest felt tight; all of the guilt she had managed to push aside came rushing back in full force. It was as if there was a massive, crushing weight bearing down on her. She knew how to relieve it… but could she?

"I… I fucked up, Luna." Lori whispered. "I fucked up real bad…"

"…Yeah, I'd say so…"

"No, Luna… I…" Lori swallowed the lump in her throat. Her fingers were digging into her knees, but she couldn't feel any pain… she felt completely numb. "I  _really_  fucked up… more than I could ever say."

Luna opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated. Just from Lori's demeanor, it was clear that there was more to it than a simple one-night stand. "Lori," She began in a serious tone, "Please. I promise you, anything you say stays between us. Swear on me life." Luna cringed slightly as the faux-British accent escaped her throat; she knew fully well that this wasn't the time for that, but quite frankly it was practically a verbal tic at this point.

Lori chewed her lip apprehensively. She knew she could trust Luna… rather, she could  _usually_ trust Luna. But not with this. Not when the truth was so horrible.

And yet… the guilt was just too much to bear.

"Lori-"

" _Lincoln!_ " Lori screamed suddenly, making her little sister jump. "It was  _Lincoln,_ okay?! I fucked him, Luna! I-I came home, and I was drunk, a-and I  _fucked him!_ " Luna froze, her blood running cold. Lori's eyes were wide, her breath escaping in ragged bursts. She'd said it. She'd actually said it, and she knew that in doing so she'd sealed her fate.

"…O-oh." Luna stammered. "L-Lincoln, huh…" She was in complete shock. She almost thought it must be a joke… it was too absurd to even consider. But, she knew Lori would never joke about something so serious. Hell, even  _Luan_ wouldn't joke about something like this. She looked away from her sister, her brow furrowing as the revelation finally set in.

Slowly, Luna got to her feet. Lori thought she was going to leave, but instead she just stood there, facing away from her older sister with her hand clamped over her mouth. Her pupils flicked around slightly as she took all this in, thinking back to the morning after the party. Lori's behavior… it had been more than a simple hangover. Lincoln had gotten flustered after hugging her. The  _dream_ that she'd teased him about... it hadn't been a dream at all.

Lori had raped her little brother.

 _Lori._  Her eldest sister, the one she and all the others would turn to for guidance. She'd  _raped_ Lincoln.

"Lun-" Lori began, but then without warning her sister wheeled around and slapped her across the face with all her strength. Lori cried out in pain as she was thrown against the armrest by the impact.

" _What is wrong with you?_ " Luna hissed. Her entire body was quaking with rage, and Lori shrunk back as much as she could.

"I'm sor-" Lori was cut off with another slap, across her other cheek this time… though not nearly as hard as the first.

"You're  _sorry?!_ You're fucking  _sorry?!_ "

"I didn't  _mean_ to!" Lori cried. "I literally don't even remember  _doing_ it! I was drunk, I-"

"You think that's an  _excuse?!_ " Luna shrieked. "You raped your goddamn  _brother,_ Lori! There's  _nothing_ you can say that excuses that!"

" _I KNOW!_ " Lori shouted back. "I  _know,_ Luna! Do you think I wouldn't take it back if I could?!" Do you think I  _wanted_ this?!"

"Do you think  _he_ wanted this?!"

That did it. The image of Lincoln's tear-stricken face returned to the forefront of Lori's mind. Lori tried to speak, but all that came out was a hoarse wheeze. And then, her body lurched forward. She began to shake with dry heaves, and Luna barely had enough time to step back before the poor girl began throwing up onto the carpet. She vomited once, twice, three times, loudly sobbing all the while. Luna stared at the pathetic sight before her with a mixture of hatred and pity; the thing before her was not the sister she knew. Gone was the bossy, headstrong Lori of the past… all that was left was a broken shell of a girl.

Luna scoffed as she stormed off to the kitchen. She hated herself for still giving a shit about the girl, but she couldn't help it… she was her sister, and she was  _hurting._  She filled a glass with water from the sink before heading back out, slamming the glass down on the coffee table hard enough for some of the water to splash out. "Here.  _Drink._ " She snapped. Lori nodded, spitting onto the floor before gratefully taking the glass, taking several large gulps of water.

Luna sighed, slumping back onto the couch and burying her face in her palm. For a long time, neither spoke. She could still hear her sister sniffling, quiet whimpers escaping her throat. Luna believed the older girl, of course. She had no doubt that Lori would never even consider such an act had she been in her right mind. Still, alcohol or not, there was no forgiving this. There was no going  _back_ from this. Lori was right… she was finished.

…But only if Luna talked.

Luna's eyes narrowed. Just the thought of letting this slide made her feel sick to her stomach. Lori  _deserved_  to go down for this. Lincoln deserved  _justice._

But Lincoln didn't remember.

Luna's fingers tightened against her forehead. She began grinding her teeth as the stress set in; as far as Lincoln knew, the whole thing had been some twisted  _fantasy._  The truth of the situation could very well traumatize the poor boy, not to mention what it would do to the others… besides, Lori was already suffering. Perhaps not suffering  _enough,_ but suffering nonetheless. Luna shut her eyes, taking a deep breath through her nose before exhaling.

"I'm not going to say anything." Luna said scornfully. "And not for  _your_ sake, either… for  _his._ " Lori didn't say anything in response, simply looking down at the vomit-coated floor in silence. "Do you fucking  _understand me,_ Lori?!" Luna shouted. Lori only gave a small nod, her expression not changing in the slightest. Luna growled and kicked the coffee table in frustration. Another uncomfortable silence hung between the two before Luna spoke again. "…You know what you have to do, right?" Luna muttered. "You… have to get rid of it. You can't have that baby, Lori."

"…Heh." To Luna's confusion, Lori simply let out a short laugh. "Hehe…hehehe…!" She began to chuckle softly. Her cackling grew louder and louder until she was howling with mad, humorless laughter. Luna wasn't sure if she should be angry or frightened… it was as though her sister had completely lost her mind; and then, as quickly as it had begun, it stopped. Lori sniffed, giving a small shake of her head. "…No."

Luna's brow furrowed. "What the hell do you mean, 'no'? You  _know_ what could happen, right?!"

"I know." Lori said quietly. She finally looked up, turning her head towards her little sister. Luna couldn't help but feel disturbed by the sight… her face was completely pale, her eyes red and puffy, and she wore a shaky, strained smile on her face. "Do you believe in God, Luna?"

"I-I can't say I do…" Luna stammered. "What does that-"

"I do." Lori continued. "I… thought I could get away with this. I thought I  _had,_ even if…" Lori's voice cracked, but she forced herself to press on. "…Even if I didn't deserve to. But I should have known better. I should have known I could never escape the things I've done." The young woman laid a trembling hand over her stomach, the fake smile slowly fading from her face. " _This_ is my punishment, Luna. If there's something wrong with it… fine. I deserve no less."

Luna frowned. Lori's decision was almost  _noble,_ in a way… stupid, but noble. "But… what are you going to do…?" Luna asked quietly. "What are you going to tell the family? What are you going to tell  _Bobby?_ "

Lori froze for a moment. She hadn't thought about that… poor Bobby was going to be heartbroken. "I-I, um…" Lori whispered. "I don't know."

 

* * *

 

Lincoln slumped back into his chair, a far-off gaze in his eyes. He could remember it clearly now… each moment burnt into his mind in vivid detail. He glanced over at his sister; she was turned slightly away from him, her shoulder shaking as she wept into her hands. "You, ah…" Lincoln swallowed the lump in his throat. "You raped me." He said plainly.

It took a moment for Lori to respond. She sniffed, trying her best to compose herself. "…I did." She said in barely above a whisper. "I'm sorry."

'I'm sorry'. It was an absurd statement, one that Lincoln may have laughed at were it not for the severity of the situation. " _...Why?_ " He asked, knowing fully well that there was no possible answer that would be good enough.

Lori bit her lip, shaking her head sadly. "I don't know. I… don't  _remember_  it, Lincoln."

"A-and Loan…"

"She's… she's your daughter, yes." Lori choked. " _Our_ daughter."

Lincoln looked away from his sister, his finger tapping rapidly against the table. Quite frankly he wasn't sure what the hell he was supposed to do, or say. There were several different things to process here, and none of them  _good_. Mostly, he just felt numb. He wasn't even  _mad_  at Lori, even though he knew he  _should_ be. Whether that was from shock or simply because she was his sister, he didn't know. What he  _did_ know was that he'd never felt so lost in his life.

"Do you understand now…?" Lori muttered under her breath. "Do you understand why I-"

" _YOU BITCH!_ " Before Lori could finish that thought, an enraged Ronnie burst through the door; Lori didn't even have time to react before the furious Latina grabbed her by the ponytail, tipping the chair back and violently throwing her to the ground. The older woman cried out in pain, but Ronnie didn't care… she was upon her in an instant.

The first punch hit her right in the mouth, busting her lip wide open.

The second struck the left side of her temple, knocking her head against the hard wooden deck.

The third barely grazed her nose as Lincoln pulled his wife off of her.

"Ronnie,  _stop!_ " Lincoln cried as he held back his struggling wife… a difficult task to be sure, considering that she was at  _least_  as strong as he was.

"Let  _go_  of me!" Ronnie shrieked. "I'll kill her! I'll fucking  _kill_  her!" Lincoln had to dig his heels against the floor as she began to drag him.

"Honey, please…!" Lincoln hissed. He suddenly regretted not joining his wife for her morning workouts. "It's not worth it!"

But Ronnie wasn't listening. She slipped free from her husband's grasp and began mercilessly kicking at the downed woman. "You  _bitch!_ You fucking backstabbing, evil  _whore!_ " Lori put her arms up to protect her face; she was at least somewhat grateful that Ronnie wasn't wearing shoes right now.

"RONNIE,  _ENOUGH!_ " Lincoln shouted, pushing his wife off of Lori. Ronnie attempted to run at her again, but Lincoln stood between her and his sister. "That's.  _Enough._ " He repeated. Ronnie scowled at him, but seemed to back down. "You okay, Lori?" He asked as he helped his sister to her feet.

"Y-yes… I'll be fine." Lori winced as she touched her bleeding lip. Between that and the bruises Ronnie had just given her, she definitely wasn't going to be feeling too great the next few days. "…I suppose I deserved that."

"You're damn right you deserved that! You deserve to  _die!_ " Ronnie screamed at the woman, in near-hysterics. "And  _you!_ " She added, pointing at her husband. "Why the  _hell_ are you defending her?!"

"Ronnie, please, you need to calm down-"

"I will not  _calm down!_ " Ronnie shot back. "She… she  _forced herself_ on you, Lincoln! Your own  _sister!_ How can you be okay with that?!"

"I'm  _not!_  But freaking out isn't going to… going to…" Lincoln trailed off as he became aware of a sound from inside the house. It sounded like someone was gasping for air, as if they were struggling to breathe. "Is that-"

" _Loan._ " Lori gasped. She darted past Lincoln into the house, following the strained breathing into the master bedroom. Sure enough, Loan was curled up on the floor, clutching her chest. Her eyes were wide open and she didn't even seem to notice that her mother was there; she simply stared straight ahead as her chest heaved rapidly. " _Loan!_ " Lori cried as she rushed to her daughter's side.

"What's going on?!" Lincoln rushed into the room, Ronnie following closely behind.

"She's having a panic attack," Lori replied. "M-my purse… go get it. And a glass of water." Neither Lincoln nor Ronnie made a move, their eyes focused on the hyperventilating girl on the floor. " _Now!_ " She ordered.

"R-right… Ronnie, please."

"…Okay." Ronnie wasn't happy about taking orders from her sister-in-law, but she wasn't about to argue… not when Loan was in such a state. She hurried off.

"Loan… Loan, baby, can you hear me?" Lori cooed gently. "Baby, it's me. I'm here… it's going to be okay." But Loan wasn't listening, or at least couldn't seem to hear her.

Lincoln was no stranger to panic attacks. They had been a fairly regular occurrence with Clyde, particularly during their teenage years. Hell, Lincoln had even had one himself when Ronnie was going into labor. But he'd never seen anything like this… the poor girl looked as though she were going into cardiac arrest. Her entire body was convulsing, spittle flying from her mouth as she desperately fought for air. "L-Lori… what can I do?!"

" _Nothing._ " Lori snapped. "Just… let me handle this." In truth, she'd never seen Loan have an attack  _this_ bad… bad enough that she was debating just calling 911 straight away. "L-Loan… Loan, listen to me." She said, attempting to get through to her daughter. "You need to breathe, honey. You're going to be okay, you just need to  _breathe._ "

Loan could barely hear her. She couldn't even  _see_ her… her pupils had narrowed to the point where her peripheral vision was practically non-existent. Even what she  _could_  see was murky and unfocused. It felt as though there was an immense pressure closing in on her, like there were hundreds of unseen tendrils wrapping around her, crushing the life out of her. She couldn't breathe. Her heart was pounding so hard that she swore it was going to explode. She was dying. She  _knew_ she was dying.

_**Good. You were never meant to exist, anyway.** _

For the first time, Loan couldn't argue.

_**You know what you are.** _

It all made sense, now… why she was the way she was. Why she was so damaged, even from the start. She was a freak. She was an inbred  _freak._

_**They never asked for you.** _

She was a monster.

_**They never WANTED you.** _

Nobody ever would.

_**Except HIM.** _

The pressure on her chest squeezed down harder. It hurt. It hurt so bad… she just wanted it to stop. She just wanted to  _die._

_**Then stop fighting it.** _

"H-here…!" Ronnie rushed back into to room with a glass of water and Lori's purse; Lori immediately snatched it out of her hand and unzipped it. She frantically dug through the purse before pulling out a small plastic pill bottle: Xanax. It was the only one of Loan's drugs that Lori had to regulate herself… the girl had become dependent on it when left to her own devices. Lori opened the bottle and tapped a single white pill out into her palm.

"Loan… sweetie, here." Lori said, offering the pill to her daughter. "Please… it's going to make you feel better… Loan, do you  _hear_ me?!" She gently shook her daughter's shoulder.

Loan tensed up at her touch. Her eyes flicked over to her mother… or rather, the  _creature_  looming over her. Through her blurred vision Lori appeared as a distorted, monstrous figure, with a black sludge seeping from where its eyes should be and blood trickling down its mouth.  **'Loan,'** it said in a voice that seemed both distant and far,  _far_ too close.  **'It's going to be okay, Loan. Take this and it will all be okay.'** Loan recoiled, backing away from the horrible sight… but it only crept closer.  **'Loan!'** It repeated, reaching one of its hands towards her.  **'Take it, Loan!** _ **Take**_ **it!'**

 

" _That's right… just like that. Take it all. That's a good girl…"_

 

Loan couldn't feel her heart beating anymore. It was as though it had simply stopped, or at least that she was no longer aware of it… she could only focus on the demon crawling towards her. The figure only grew more distorted as Loan's eyes began to brim with tears. "No…" She croaked out, her voice finally returning to her. "Stay away…"

' **Loan, let me help you!'** Said the beast in a forceful tone.

 

" _Stop fighting it… you know you love it. You're such a pretty little girl, Loan…"_

 

"N-no…" Loan whimpered as her back hit the wall. She couldn't run… she never could.

 

" _God, you're even tighter than your mother…"_

 

" _Stop_ it…!" Loan spat at the creature. "L-leave me  _alone!_ "

"Lori…" A kind voice rang out from somewhere far away. Who  _was_ that…? "I don't think you should-"

' _ **Let me handle it!**_ **'** The creature roared.  **'Loan, you're going to pass out! Just take it!'**

"Get away from me…!" Loan cried, huddling into a tight ball. She couldn't see the creature anymore, but she could  _feel_ it. It had  _always_  been there, hanging over her head like the sword of Damocles… ready to come plunging down upon her at a moment's notice.

 

" _Don't scream."_

 

Loan could feel the tendrils again, wrapping around her, constricting her, probing every corner of her body they could reach.

 

" _Don't SCREAM."_

 

She didn't even have to look. She knew that the tendrils belonged to that monster, that  _devil_ that tormented her every waking moment. She knew that it was getting closer, bearing down upon her as it always had… it was going to hurt her again. It was going to  _defile_  her again.

' **Loan!** _ **TAKE IT!**_ **'**

 

" _DON'T YOU EVER FUCKING SCREAM!"_

 

" _GET AWAY FROM ME!_ " Loan shrieked at the top of her lungs. She lashed out, kicking the beast directly in the chest. It let out a deep wheeze as it was knocked back, tumbling out of her limited field of vision. Loan's eyes went wide. She'd attacked it… she'd  _hurt_  it.

She'd made it  _mad._

Loan let out a frightened whine, covering her head with her arms. She'd done it now. It wasn't just going to hurt her, now… it was going to  _make_  it hurt, just as it had whenever she'd dared to fight back. She could already feel it approaching again… looming over her. Larger than her.  _Stronger_ than her.

"Loan?"

The terrified girl froze. There was that voice again… not the overbearing, booming voice of that monster. This voice was kind, and gentle. Loan raised her head just enough to peek out at the person kneeling beside her. It was him… her uncle.

No… her  _father._

"Loan," Lincoln said again. "It's going to be okay. There's nothing to be afraid of… nobody here is going to hurt you."

"U-uncle Lincoln…" She gasped. His voice was so soothing, and yet it did little to ease the pressure in her chest. "I-I can't… breathe…"

"Yes you can, Loan. Your heart is fine… your brain's just telling you that it's not." He assured her. "You've been through this before, right…? You know what this is, Loan. You can beat this. Just… focus. Breathe." Loan tried her best to follow his advice… her breaths were ragged and unsteady, but she  _was_  breathing. And as her nerves began to settle, she could feel that her heart was beating too… well,  _pounding_  rather, but it was something at least. "Loan… here." Lincoln held out his palm, offering his daughter the pill. "I'm not going to force you to take it. But… it will help, I think."

Loan stared at the pill for a moment. Xanax wasn't one of her usual medications… it was reserved only for her most severe attacks. But her mother would always  _make_  her take it, going so far as to force it down her throat if she was being uncooperative.

But Lincoln wasn't  _making_ her do anything.

Loan snatched the pill from his hand and gulped it down dry, then took the glass of water he offered her and chugged it down in one go. It helped to ease her aching throat a bit, though it would still be some time before the medicine kicked in. "…Thank you." She said quietly. Lincoln just gave a small nod and a reassuring smile.

"Loan…?" Another voice spoke from behind Lincoln. "Loan, sweetie… are you okay?" Loan peered behind Lincoln, spotting Lori on the floor; she sounded a bit winded, and had her hand pressed against the center of her chest. She realized then that the 'monster' had just been her mother. She'd  _kicked_  her mother.

And, in all honesty… she only felt slightly bad about it.

"…Stay away from me." The young woman said as Lori tried to approach her.

"Loan…"

"Stay  _away._ " She repeated with a noticeable edge to her tone. Lori's eyes widened slightly; this wasn't like before. Loan wasn't panicking anymore… or at the very least, not in the frantic manner she had been. She was  _glaring_  at her…  _ordering_ her to keep back.

Lori frowned. "Loan, I'm sorry… I never meant-"

"I know." Loan muttered coldly. "You… you never meant for any of it. Same as always, right…?" Lori winced slightly at her daughter's words. "You never meant to drink. You never meant to hurt me. You never meant…" Loan swallowed the lump in her throat and pressed on. "You never meant to hurt your brother… you never meant to do  _that_  to him, right?"

"O-of course not…"

"I-it doesn't matter. Whether you meant to or not… you  _did_  do it. You did  _that_ … and now  _I'm_ here." Loan drew her legs in close, looking away from her mother. "You're… you're no better than  _he_  was."

"L-Loan…!" Lori gasped. Her daughter may as well have stabbed her straight through the heart; she searched her brain for some kind of response, but there was nothing she could say. Loan was right. What she'd done to Lincoln was hardly different from what Chester had done to  _her._ "I-I…" She stammered, looking to Lincoln for some kind of guidance… but he couldn't bring himself to look at her. She even glanced at Ronnie, but the woman stared back at her as though she were something disgusting she'd plucked out of the drain. Lori took a deep, shuddering breath, then hurried out of the room.

An uncomfortable silence weighed down on the three remaining Louds. Ronnie stood with a tense posture, the fury in her eyes still evident. Finally, she stormed off after her sister-in-law. " _Ronnie!_ " Lincoln called out after her, but she was already gone. "Dammit…" Lincoln sighed, turning back to his daughter. "Loan, will you be okay here for a bit…?"

"…Yes." Loan said softly. "I'll be fine."

 

* * *

 

Lincoln was relieved to find that his wife hadn't beaten Lori to a bloody pulp… instead she stood with her arms crossed, glaring down at the older woman as she sat on the couch with her face buried in her hands. Lincoln wasn't quite sure what was holding her back… perhaps she felt some measure of pity for his sister's plight.

"I'm sorry." Lori said in a quiet, hoarse voice. "I'm so sorry."

"Yeah, so I've heard." Ronnie huffed.

"Ronnie-"

" _Can it,_  Lincoln." She snapped at her husband. "I've been waiting over twenty years to give this bitch a piece of my mind."

"Mom…?" A tiny voice called out from upstairs. It was Bobby, peeking down to see what all the commotion was. "What's going on?"

"Go back to bed, Bobby."

"But-"

"Go. To.  _Bed._ " Ronnie ordered. Bobby didn't need to be told again; he quickly scurried out of sight, followed by the sound of a door closing. Ronnie turned back towards the morose woman on the couch. She sucked her teeth in silence for a few moments, trying to find the right words.

"…Your son's name is Bobby." It was Lori herself that spoke first, her voice coming out at little more than a strained whisper. Ronnie's scowl deepened.

"That's right."

"I… never meant to hurt him, Ronalda. I loved him. To this day, I  _still_  love him." Lori muttered. "I was trying to  _spare_  him all of this… spare him from bearing the consequences of  _my_  mistakes."

"Well, you spared him a  _hell_  of a lot more than that." Ronnie hissed.

"Ronnie, please-"

"Shut  _up,_ Lincoln!" Ronnie shot back. Lincoln sighed, scratching the back of his head. Clearly, his wife wasn't going to be dissuaded… if nothing else, at least she wasn't being violent. "You know, I thought it was impossible to despise you more than I did," She continued. "But no… you're even more vile than I could have imagined. You are a horrible human being, Lori. I hope you're  _aware_  of that."

"…I know." Lori said quietly. Even now, part of Ronnie just wanted to beat the woman's face in… but she doubted there was anything she could do that would be worse than the hell Lori had created for herself. Ronnie grunted in frustration as she flopped down onto the couch as far away from her sister-in-law as possible. Lincoln joined beside her.

For some time nobody spoke, nor did they look at one another. Ronnie kept her arms crossed over her chest, her furious gaze trained somewhere off to the side, while Lincoln and Lori both stared at the floor in thought, their arms rested across their knees with their fingers folded together. Even now, the two siblings were strikingly alike.

"I, um…" Lori began, wincing as she ran her tongue across her split lip. "I've messed up. A  _lot._  And there's nothing I can do to change that." She sounded as though she were about to cry, but she simply had no tears left to shed. "I've been horrible to you, Lincoln. I've been horrible to  _her._ At times, I must admit… I even  _resented_ her, simply for being a constant reminder of my sins." She swallowed before continuing. "But… I've always tried to do right by her. Even at my worst, I  _tried._ And I failed her. Time and time again… I  _failed_ her. And now, she's terrified of me." Lori sniffed. "…I suppose she should be. God knows I've hurt her… too many times to count."

Lincoln could understand, to an extent; he could only imagine what it was like to be a single parent, especially to a child as…  _unique_  as Loan. But that was no excuse. From the sound of it, nearly every choice she'd made in life was a mistake… a mistake that had damaged not only her, but her daughter as well. "…There's always time to set things right, Lori."

"I know." Lori replied. She fidgeted with her fingers in silence for a moment before continuing. "I already accepted the position, Lincoln. I'm leaving in a little over three weeks."

"Lori…"

"I have to, Lincoln. This job… it's too lucrative not to."

Lincoln frowned deeply. "Money isn't what she needs, Lori."

"…I am aware, yes." Lori sighed. "That's why… I have a proposition." She didn't even need to say anything for the couple to understand what she meant. Lincoln had even been considering bringing it up himself, but he had to admit… the prospect of taking in a stranger so suddenly was downright overwhelming. But it was either that or sending her off with Lori… and regardless of the circumstances, Loan was his daughter. He didn't want to lose her just as she had entered his life.

"No."

It had been Ronnie that spoke. What shocked Lincoln most was the finality of it… she hadn't even  _hesitated._  "Ronnie-"

"I said no." She cut him off curtly. "We can't just…  _take her in,_ Lincoln. She's not our responsibility… she's  _hers._  Because of what  _she_  did to  _you._ "

"So, what? You'd rather Loan just go off to  _Japan?_ "

"That's…" Ronnie's hardened expression faltered slightly. She hadn't heard  _that_  part. "W-well she can't stay  _here!_  I am  _not_  carrying this  _whore's_ burden!"

"My daughter is  _not_ a burden!" Lori snapped. "She's a wonderful girl… she just needs to be  _with_ someone! And I-"

"Girls, enough." Lincoln cut in. "Ronnie… she can stay here if she wants."

Ronnie stared at her husband as though he had just grown an extra head. "Y-you can't just make that choice on your own!" She sputtered. "I get a say too!"

"So does she." Lincoln replied calmly, even as turmoil raged in his heart. "If she wants to stay, she can stay… it's her choice, not yours."

"I am your  _wife!_ " Ronnie shouted. "You don't get to make these choices on your own! We have to  _discuss_ this, at least!"

"She's my  _daughter,_  Ronnie." Lincoln said in a stern tone. "There's nothing to discuss. She can stay if she wants… that's it." Ronnie gaped open-mouthed at her husband before her expression deepened into a scowl; she silently got to her feet before storming off towards the kitchen. Lincoln sighed softly. "…I'll do it, Lori. But she has to choose."

"She's no trouble at all, I promise you…" Lori assured her brother. "Even with her outbursts. A-and I'll send money, she won't-"

" _Lori._ " Lincoln interjected. "She chooses. She's been forced to do enough." Lori chewed her lip, giving a small nod.

"…Yes. She has."

 

* * *

 

 

"Loan?" Lincoln asked as he returned to the bedroom. His daughter remained huddled in the corner with her knees pulled up to her chest. She wasn't panicking anymore, at least… rather, she had a distant, far-off look in her eyes. "Loan, how are you feeling…?"

"…Fine." She muttered. "It's time for me to go now, isn't it?"

"Actually… about that." Lincoln said. "Your mom and I wanted to speak with you… can you come out?"

Loan slowly looked over at Lincoln. He had that same gentle, supportive smile on his face… as much as she wanted to, she couldn't say no. "A-alright." Lincoln's smile broadened slightly, and he offered a hand to help her up.

She accepted it without hesitation.

Lincoln returned to the living room with his daughter in tow, who couldn't help but tense up slightly upon seeing Lori. It wasn't that she  _hated_ her mother… but she couldn't stand being near her right now. Not after she knew the horrible things she had done.

Lori was hardly surprised that Loan opted to sit at the far end of the couch. The girl wouldn't look at her, and she pulled her knees against her chest once again. Normally, she would never put her feet on someone else's furniture without permission… but Loan wasn't thinking about that right now. All she could think about was her mother, and what she had done to uncle Lincoln.

_**And what you ARE.** _

"So…" Lincoln began as he sat down a few feet from his sister. "Lori, do you want to…?"

"Oh… y-yes." Lori cleared her throat. "Loan… I can never express to you just how  _sorry_  I am about this. About  _everything._ " Loan didn't respond. She simply stared at the ground, her eyes glassy and unfocused. She looked downright  _shell-shocked._ "I've… been an awful mother to you. But I want to try to set things right. I want to give you a  _chance._ "

Still, no response. Loan had no idea what her mother was talking about. She didn't have a chance. She'd  _never_ had a chance.

_**You never will.** _

"Look, Loan… I know this is all a shock for you," Lincoln said. "It's… a big shock for me, too. But… you're our daughter.  _Both_  of ours. And you deserve a choice." Loan's eyes flicked up to her uncle.

"A choice…?"

"Yes," Lori said in a quiet, hesitant voice. "Loan… you've meant the world to me since the moment you were born. I know I've hurt you… I know I've made mistakes. But I want you to understand that all I ever wanted was what's best for you." Loan frowned. Of course she knew that… she was grateful to her mother for everything she'd done for her. "This time… I want  _you_  to choose what's best for you."

Loan's head snapped towards her mother in an instant. "What…?"

Lori gave a small nod. It was clear that she was having a hard time keeping it together… her shoulders were trembling, and her lips were pouting slightly. "It's… it's not right. You're an adult… and you deserve to make your own choices. I'm not going to force you anymore. I just want you to be  _happy,_ sweetie." Lori took a deep breath; this was one of the hardest things she'd ever had to say. "E-either… either come to Japan with me, or… stay here. W-with your  _father._ "

Loan's eyes went wide. Time seemed to stop for a moment; there was no way her mom had just said that. "W-what…?"

"You can stay here, or come with me." Lori repeated. She was staring at her lap, wringing the hem of her skirt with one hand. "I understand if you want to stay. Your father is a good man, Loan… I know he would treat you well. Better than I have, at least."

"I-I…" Loan stammered. In all truth, she hadn't come here to get away forever… she knew that was an impossible thing to ask for. But now… she  _could._

_**Is that really what you want?** _

Loan swallowed. Uncle Lincoln was nice to her, yes… but she barely knew him. Her mother had raised her herself from the moment she was born… she loved her, despite her flaws. She  _knew_  her, and she knew that she would do her best to make her happy.

_**You'll never be happy.** _

She could feel her heart rate increasing. Stay or go. Two options. Stay…

_**With a man you don't know.** _

...or go.

_**Why fight it? Go running into mommy's arms. You know you will. You always do.** _

Loan's chest began to tighten up again. Her vision was starting to blur. It was happening  _again._

_**Again? God, even the pills aren't enough for a basket case like you.** _

"I-I, um… I…!" Loan's breaths grew shallow; she had to choose. Stay or go. Stay or go.

_**Go. GO. RUN AWAY. RUN HOME TO MOMMY.** _

"Loan?"

A voice cut through the panic: his. Again… his. Loan turned her head towards her uncle; he was wearing that same benign expression as before.

"I know this is a lot to put on you," He said in a soothing tone. "Whatever you choose, we'll accept it." Why was he so nice to her? He knew what she was. She was an abomination, something that was never meant to exist… born from a terrible crime that  _he_  was the victim of. And yet, he still wanted her here.

_**He doesn't want you here. Who would? You're a freak. The fact that you exist at all has ruined his life.** _

But her mom was… her mom. She'd made mistakes, yes… but she'd always tried her best.

_**She's hurt you before. She'll hurt you again.** _

Her mom loved her. Her uncle didn't… he  _couldn't._ He didn't  _know_ her.

_**He'll hurt you too. Just like HE did.** _

Loan squeezed her eyes shut and grit her teeth, trying her best to shut out the noise in her head.  _Uncle Lincoln would never do that,_ she told herself.  _He's a good person._

_**They always are, aren't they?** _

"Stop it…" She hissed under her breath. She knew the voice in her head was lying to her. It always did.

_**I only say what you're too scared to.** _

"I'm not scared…!"

_**Go with mommy, Loan. Better the devil you know, right?** _

"NO!"

"L-Loan?!" Lincoln leaned forward in concern. "Are you-"

" _I'm STAYING!_ " Loan practically shouted. A heavy silence fell over the room; both Lincoln and his sister wore a look of surprise on their faces, perhaps less due to her choice than the forceful manner in which she had made it. Loan was breathing heavily, as though simply making the choice had been as exhausting as a jog through the park. "I… I want to stay here," She said quietly. "I… want to stay with uncle Lincoln."

Lori had expected this. Quite frankly, she had  _wanted_ this… she knew that she wasn't what Loan needed. She knew that her daughter deserved  _better…_  she deserved her  _father._  And yet, hearing it out loud, directly from her daughter's mouth, made her feel as though a vice was tightening around her heart. "I… I see." Lori stammered. She took a deep, shuddering breath. "Very well, then." She said in as stoic of a voice she could manage. "I-I suppose… I'll be on my way, then."

"Lori-"

"It's fine, Lincoln." Lori said, holding up her hand. "It's fine. This is… this is what she's chosen." Lori unsteadily got to her feet; it was taking all the resolve she had in her to fight back her tears. "I, um… I will call you tomorrow, then. To… sort everything out." Loan didn't respond. Once again, she couldn't bring herself to look at her mother. Lori bit her lip and averted her eyes from the girl in front of her. "Well then… goodnight, Loan." With that, Lori turned and briskly walked to the door.

"Lori, wait!" Lincoln called after his sister, but it was too late… she was gone. Lincoln sighed. "I'll be right back, Loan…" He said. Loan had withdrawn completely, her face buried into her knees… but she gave him a small nod nonetheless. Lincoln got up and hurried after Lori.

 

* * *

 

Thankfully, she hadn't left yet. Lori stood beside her sleek black Corvette, bracing herself against it as she wept. "Lori…" Lincoln muttered as he approached her. "I'm sorry." Lori shook her head, sniffling before wiping her eyes on her sleeve. Her streaking makeup ruined her blouse, but she didn't care… she could afford a new one.

"Don't apologize, Lincoln." Lori whispered. "She… made the right choice. I've done all I can for her." Even now, Lincoln felt nothing but sympathy for his sister. He knew he shouldn't, but he did. She loved Loan, that much was undeniable… and Lincoln was, for all intents and purposes, taking the girl away from her. "S-she…" Lori began. "It's okay if you ask her about her… disorders. She doesn't like when people dance around it."

"Right…" Lincoln said under his breath. "What, er-"

"Anxiety. Depression. PTSD. Mild OCD… that one's not so bad, though. She mostly manages that on her own." Lori explained. "I-I know it sounds bad, but as long as she has her medication she won't give you trouble."

Lincoln nodded. It had been abundantly clear that there was a lot going on with the poor girl, but he'd had no idea just  _how_  extensive her issues were. Still, he'd already made up his mind. He wouldn't reject her for being who she was. "Anything I should know?"

"Just make sure she's taken her medication," Lori said. "She doesn't have panic attacks often, and they're usually not so bad. And sometimes she may seem a bit distracted, but usually she's listening. A-and she loves snack foods, so… it's best she has her own stash. I've seen her tear through fifteen packs of Oreos in a single day..." Lori let out a wistful chuckle. "I'd never seen her so worked up in her life. And yet she never puts on weight, it's the damnedest thing…"

"Lori…"

"A-and sometimes she plays her music too loud, but she doesn't mean to… and if you see her biting her nails, just remind her not to… a-and…" Lori whimpered. She didn't want to do this. She didn't want to let her baby girl go.

But she had to.

Lori looked up, her anguished blue eyes meeting her brother's. "Just… take care of her for me, Lincoln. She's… she's literally all I have." Lincoln couldn't help but smirk slightly as the word left her throat… a small remaining piece of her old self.

"You know I will," Lincoln said. In truth, he was still apprehensive about this whole thing himself… but even in the limited time he'd spent with his daughter, he'd grown attached. He'd grown to care for her almost immediately, as though he were guided by some paternal instinct. He wanted her in his life.

She was his daughter.

"I'll get things sorted out with her psychiatrist," His sister explained. "She mostly has phone appointments, so you won't have to travel to the city… often." Lori sighed. "I assume she'll want to meet you face-to-face. You could find a local one too, but she  _trusts_  Dr. Patel."

"That's fine," Lincoln assured her.

"And she'll need to get the rest of her things. The sooner the better… it will make her feel more at home."

"I can drive her out tomorrow, if she's willing." Lincoln said. He was thankful that he owned an SUV… it may not be the prettiest car in the world, but it had plenty of storage space.

"One…one more thing." Lori unzipped her purse and got out the bottle of Xanax. "Here," She said as she handed it to her brother. "You need to hold onto this one. It's only for when she has bad panic attacks… and I mean  _bad_  ones. Even then, you can't use it too often. It's… not great for her."

Lincoln frowned as he looked down at the bottle. He'd heard that Xanax was some pretty serious stuff. "I'll keep an eye on it."

"Thank you." There was an uneasy silence between the two… neither was quite sure where to leave things, now. For a moment, it looked as though she were about to hug him, but she quickly backed off. Lincoln wasn't even sure if he could have accepted it if she had. She was his sister, yes… but she was also his rapist. She had hidden the truth from him for twenty-one years. She'd hidden his  _daughter_  from him for twenty-one years.

But he still loved her.

"Well… I-I'll talk to you tomorrow, then." Lori muttered. "Goodnight, Lincoln."

"Yeah…" Was all Lincoln could say as his sister got into her car and pulled out of his driveway. He watched as she drove off in silence; this all almost felt like a  _dream_ to him. In barely over two hours, Lori had reentered his life… bringing the revelation that not only had she forced herself upon him as a child, but had given birth to his  _daughter._ And now, that daughter was living with him. Just like  _that._

Lincoln let out a deep sigh. He began to wonder if perhaps he had bitten off more than he could chew… but then again, he had always been one to favor his heart over his brain. He wasn't even sure how he was supposed to  _explain_  this, especially to Bobby. He had already introduced her as the boy's cousin, and he was at least smart enough to realize that her being his half-sister as well was somewhat  _unusual._

Well, he couldn't worry about that right now. Lincoln went back inside to see Loan still in the same position he had left her in. For a moment he thought she had fallen asleep, but then she lifted her head. "Is she gone…?"

"…Yeah."

Loan gave a small nod, looking away from him. She seemed distant in a way different than before… she didn't seem  _nervous_ , just  _confused._  He could hardly blame her; her entire life had just changed in an instant, as had his. "Are you going to be okay?" He asked as he sat down beside her. He couldn't help but notice that she didn't try to move away this time… though he supposed she had nowhere to go anyway. She was already huddled as far into the corner as she could go.

"…I think so." Loan said. She slowly released her legs, sliding back down into a normal seated position. "I, um… the pill is working now. So… I'll be fine." She  _did_ sound a lot more evened-out than before, at least.

"That's good." Lincoln twiddled his thumbs in his lap; this was more awkward than he had anticipated. Just what was he supposed to say to a daughter he never knew he had? "Sooo… I guess you're living here now."

Well, at least he tried.

"Yeah… I guess so." Loan muttered. She glanced around briefly, taking in her surroundings once more. This place was nice, to be sure… she'd never mentioned it to her mother, but the hard edges of their modern-styled apartment always made her a bit uncomfortable. But her uncle's house felt… rounder. Friendlier. It felt like a  _home_.

…But was it hers?

"Um…" Her uncle coughed. "Would you like to see your room…?"

"Y-yeah… alright." Loan replied. She knew fully well that Lincoln was just as lost as she was. She couldn't blame him.

_**You're intruding on his life.** _

Loan ignored her intrusive thoughts. She was already here… she'd already made up her mind. Loan picked up her duffel bag off the floor and turned back to her uncle. "Um… thank you." She mumbled.

"Nothing to thank me for, Loan." Lincoln said with a smile. Loan couldn't help but return a small one herself. "C'mon… it's upstairs."

"O-okay." Loan muttered. She wasn't too fond of stairs… or heights in general, really. That's why her mother had gone out of her way to get an apartment on the ground floor, one of many things Loan felt immensely grateful to her for. Still, dealing with stairs was a necessity of life, and Loan had learned how to manage it. As she followed her father up the stairs, she counted each step in her mind.  _One._   _Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seve- six,_ Loan caught herself as she lost her footing.  _Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten. Eleven. Twelve. Thirteen._ Loan breathed a sigh of relief; if it had been fourteen steps, she might not have been able to manage it.

Although… does the second floor itself count as a step…?

Loan shook the thought aside.  _It's thirteen,_ she told herself.  _Not fourteen._

 

* * *

 

Ronnie sat on her bed with her arms crossed, positively fuming with rage. Never in her life had she been so furious with her husband… they'd had their fights before, of course, like any other couple. But this wasn't a mere squabble; Lincoln had just accepted a strange woman into their home, permanently. Lincoln had accepted that  _whore's_  inbred child without hesitation. She could hardly be surprised… Lincoln had never been particularly rational when it came to family matters.

She immediately got to her feet as she heard the doorknob turn. It was him, of course… Ronnie shot him the fiercest glare he'd ever seen, but surprisingly he was the first one to speak. "We need to talk."

"Oh?  _Now_  we need to talk. Great.  _Wonderful._ " Ronnie snapped. "Here I thought my words counted for  _nothing_  in this house."

"Ronnie-"

"No. You fucking  _listen_  to me, Lincoln." Ronnie snarled, jabbing her finger into her husband's chest. "I have put up with  _enough_ tonight. You completely disregarded me. You made the stupidest decision of your life without even  _consulting me_."

"Stupid decision…?" Lincoln scoffed. "Taking in my own daughter is a stupid decision to you?"

" _Yes!_  This isn't some  _child,_ Lincoln! This is an adult! A  _special needs_ adult, no less!"

"She's not an invalid, Ronnie." Lincoln said. "She's not incapable. You  _talked_ to her, you saw for yourself, didn't you?"

"What I  _saw_  was a grown woman spazzing out like some  _mental case!_ " His wife shot back. "For fuck's sake, she's  _inbred,_  Lincoln! There's something  _wrong_ with her!"

"There's nothing  _wrong_  with her, Ronnie!" Lincoln hissed. "She just needs some help getting on her own two feet!"

"Then let her whore mother deal with it! She  _raped_  you, Lincoln! This…  _thing_ is not your-"

"THAT  _'THING'_ IS MY DAUGHTER!" Lincoln shouted. "MY FUCKING  _DAUGHTER,_ RONNIE!" His wife shrunk back slightly; she'd clearly struck a nerve. "You… you wouldn't do any different in my position… if that girl was yours and Bobby's-"

"Don't you  _dare-_ "

"YOU WOULDN'T DO ANY DIFFERENT!" Her husband roared. "I am  _not_  abandoning Loan! I am  _not_ abandoning my own fucking  _daughter!_ And just because you can't forgive Lori does  _not_ give you the right to take it out on  _her!_  Do you fucking  _understand_ me, Ronnie?!"

"I… I…" Ronnie stammered. She couldn't think of a good response to that… she'd  _never_  heard her husband so angry before. He hadn't even been this mad at  _Lori._ "I… think you should sleep on the couch tonight." She said quietly, turning away from him.

"Yeah," Lincoln huffed. "I was thinking the same thing." With that he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

 

* * *

 

Loan sat on her bed, allowing herself to take in what was now her new home. It was larger than her room at the apartment, but considerably more plain… made sense to her, considering that this was a guest room. She figured she'd feel more at home once she put up her posters. If it was alright with her aunt and uncle, at least… she wasn't about to start sticking thumbtacks into their walls without permission.

All in all the room was very… beige. White, and beige. Loan didn't mind this… the colors were very relaxing to look at. She also had a nice queen-size bed, which felt to be in good shape… she had worn out the springs on her own mattress years ago, and she'd never worked up the nerve to ask her mother for a new one. The blanket was just the way she liked them, too: soft and thick. And it smelled clean too, unlike her own. The whole  _room_  smelled clean, free from the scent of stale cheesy snacks and unwashed clothing. She didn't  _mean_  to let her room get so messy, it just kind of… did. But she'd do her best to keep this one in decent shape.

_**It's not yours, after all.** _

The one thing that  _did_ give her pause was the vanity mirror in the corner. Loan didn't much care for mirrors, but much like stairs, she had forced herself to get used to them. Still… she couldn't help but feel a bit uncomfortable.

Loan sighed. She figured now might be a good time to take her medication. It was late, but she'd been at this for a while… she'd take it tomorrow in the afternoon, the day after  _at_  noon, and the day after  _that_  she would go back to her morning schedule.

Normally she'd put them in the medicine cabinet, but this floor had a shared bathroom… and she liked to keep her meds close by. She opened a large Ziploc bag filled with five pill bottles. One by one she removed them, setting each bottle down on the nightstand. Alphabetic order, labels facing out, neatly arranged in a straight line. She took them alphabetically as well, though she knew fully well that there was no reason to do this. She supposed it was like holding down the B button when catching a Pokémon… did nothing to help, but it sure felt like it did.

She'd gotten used to swallowing them dry over the years, as she often didn't want to bother getting a drink. Of course, the kitchen was only a brief walk from her bedroom, but Loan tended to not do things until she felt she had to. This habit had led to more than one bathroom emergency, but thankfully those had always worked out alright.

So far, at least.

Loan figured she should get changed… she'd been wearing the same clothes for two days straight, after all. She had to pat herself on the back for that one, as she was quite accustomed to going  _longer_ than that.

She slid off her sweater, followed by her Dragon Ball t-shirt, though few would be able to recognize it as such considering how much it had faded over the years. Next, her sweatpants; she rarely wore anything else, as jeans were far too constricting for her to handle. Underneath that, she wore a simple pair of boxers. She knew they were for men, but she liked them. She did, however, regret not wearing a bra today… as well as forgetting to pack any into her bag. She didn't particularly  _like_ wearing them, but like her mother she had a fairly ample bosom.  _Unlike_ her mother, however, she'd much rather be rid of the damn things. All they did was get in the way.

She changed into a plain white t-shirt and a pair of Batman pajama bottoms. She couldn't remember the last time she had gotten new clothes, not that it mattered… it wasn't like she had anyone to impress. As for her dirty clothes, she opted to drape them over the vanity mirror. They didn't completely cover it, but they covered enough for her to feel content.

Loan went about her business almost robotically, unpacking the rest of her belongings in complete silence. She hadn't brought much… just the essentials. Well, essentials for  _her._  This consisted of a few extra clothes, her laptop, a sketchbook, several handhelds including a  _Game Gear_  of all things, and something that looked like a small plastic cube with different components on all sides. Nowhere in this assortment was any sort of toiletry bag… no toothbrush or toothpaste to speak of. The thought of bringing them had never even crossed her mind.

Loan picked up the small cube and flopped down on her new bed. She idly played with the fidgeter in her hand, clicking one of the buttons rapidly, then flicking the switch back and forth as she stared at the ceiling. She wasn't sure what to do now. It was all so surreal to her… she was in a completely different room, in a completely different home, with a completely different set of people. She'd come down here on her own volition, leaving her home on her own, just to have a place to escape to for a few days… and now she was  _living_ here.

Without her mother.

Loan frowned as she stared at the textured ceiling. If she looked closely, she could make out little shapes and figures that she knew fully well weren't really there. Still, it gave her something to focus on for the time being. She couldn't force herself to draw right now, and playing a game seemed unappealing too… she considered firing up her laptop, but without the WiFi password there was little she could do with it. She regretted not asking for the password while her uncle was still up, but she figured she was already being enough of a bother as is. Thanks to her little nap earlier, she wouldn't be able to get to sleep even if she tried. She figured tonight was just going to be one of those nights.

Before long, she felt a familiar pressure in her bladder. Loan sighed as she pushed herself up; as much as she wanted to tune everything out and just  _exist_ for a few hours, she couldn't ignore the call of nature for very long. Loan slid out of bed, her sock-clad feet touching the carpeted floor. She always wore socks… she didn't particularly like feet, hers nor anyone else's. There was just something about the way they looked that was  _off-putting_ to the girl.

Lori tip-toed her way across the room, fairly certain that her room was right above the master bedroom. Unfortunately for her, the bathroom was all the way down at the opposite end of the hall… not a great distance, but a bit more than she could feel happy about. As she made her way down the hall she noticed a soft light and even softer noise coming from downstairs, but she couldn't bring herself to look. She hated heights, after all.

To her dismay, the bathroom had one of those mirrors that stretched along the entire back wall. She couldn't very well cover that one, not that she  _would_ anyway… this wasn't her room, after all. Instead, she just made sure to stare at the floor as she walked to the toilet. Thankfully, there was no mirror on the opposite wall.

It didn't take very long to relieve herself… she hadn't had much to drink in a while, not that she was particularly thirsty. Loan flushed and got up, pulling her pants and underpants back up around her waist. Once again, she was sure to keep her eyes trained on the floor as she walked to the sink; she knew she would get better at dealing with this in time. She always did.

Loan may not have been one for personal hygiene, but she was always sure to wash her hands thoroughly. She could still slightly see her reflection out of her peripheral vision, which she was fine with… still, she took a deep breath and forced herself to look up.

There she was. Same as ever… an absolute wreck of a human being. Slightly  _worse_ than usual in fact, though she could excuse that given the circumstances. She never liked looking at herself, be it through a mirror or through a photograph… though she greatly preferred the latter. A photograph, after all, could be fixed. But her reflection? Nothing could be done about that. She hated the fact that she looked like her mother, but not because she hated  _her._ Rather, she could only feel as though she had no identity of her own. She was nothing more than a flawed, imperfect  _copy_ of her mother, and even with her hair grown out past her shoulders that was all she would ever be.

Loan gingerly touched one of the dark bags under her eyes. It was puffy and soft to the touch; she gently pulled down on it to look at her eye, finding it to be slightly bloodshot. She realized now that, much like her chapstick, she had forgotten to bring her eye drops with her. Still, they weren't particularly uncomfortable.

What  _was_  uncomfortable was her dry lips. Loan glanced over at the medicine cabinet to her left. She didn't like touching other people's things without permission, but she knew that licking her lips would just make them worse. Thankfully, among the various multivitamins and children's cologne was a tube of Neosporin. It wasn't chapstick, but it would do. She dabbed a small amount onto her finger, then smeared it across her lower lip. Then, she rolled her upper lip against it, spreading it evenly across her lips. The effect was instantaneous, and Loan breathed a small sigh of relief.

As she made her way back to her room, Loan once again noticed the faint glow and sounds coming from the living room. This time, she ventured a peek over the banister; down below, Lincoln sat on the couch with the afghan laying across his lap, watching television with the volume turned down low. She couldn't quite see  _what_ he was watching, but it sounded… familiar. Music that she swore she had heard before, overlaid with voices. They sounded Japanese.

Was he watching anime?

Loan's curiosity got the better of her, and she carefully started to descend the stairs. Certainly a quick look wouldn't hurt. But upon reaching the second to last step, the wooden surface creaked beneath her feet. Loan froze. That was  _loud…_  there was no doubt in her mind that her uncle had heard it.

He had.

Lincoln turned his head, his look of surprise fading to a warm smile upon seeing his daughter. "Hey."

"H-hey." She wanted to apologize for disturbing him, but he seemed…  _happy_ to see her. She wasn't used to that. Still she remained in place, unsure of exactly what she was supposed to do.

"You can come down if you like," Lincoln offered. "I could… use the company, honestly."

"O-okay…" Loan muttered. She took her last step and shuffled over to the couch a bit awkwardly. Looking up at the TV, she realized that she knew this anime… quite well, in fact. It was one of her favorites, one she had watched many times before. "…Akira."

"You've seen it?"

Loan nodded, a small smile crossing her face. "I love this movie."

"Do you… want to join me?" He asked. "There's room under the blanket for two."

Loan considered his offer for a moment. Under normal circumstances, sharing a blanket with a man she barely knew would be a terrifying prospect. But she  _knew_ this man would never hurt her. He was far too kind for that. "…Okay." She said. Lincoln smirked; as she circled around to the front of the couch, he held up the afghan for her. "Thank you," Loan muttered as she slid in beside him, closer than even she had expected to.

For some time, the two watched the film in silence. It felt… surprisingly comfortable. Lori had never really taken an interest in her daughter's hobbies… on the rare occasions they  _had_ watched television together, it was always something like Law & Order or House of Cards… quite frankly, their tastes couldn't have been further apart.

"So… are you settling in alright?" Lincoln asked. Loan hesitated briefly, then nodded.

"I think so. I  _will,_ at least. It's kind of… overwhelming, right now."

"I can understand that," Said Lincoln. "This is a big change for you."

"You, too." Loan muttered. "I'm sorry I just… butted into your life like this."

"You have nothing to be sorry for, Loan." Lincoln sighed. "You didn't know either, right?" Loan shook her head sadly.

"I didn't."

Another silence fell over the pair. The whole situation was…  _jarring,_ to say the least. Lincoln glanced at his daughter; it was immediately apparent that she was far more grounded than she had been before. She wasn't trembling in fear, nor was she wringing her hands nervously. He noticed her eye twitch slightly, but figured that was something she couldn't really control. "You seem to be feeling better."

"Yeah… I took my meds." She explained. "They… help a lot, like I said."

"I see." Lincoln said as he tapped his finger against his knee. He remembered what Lori said about her… that she didn't like when people danced around the issue. Besides, he figured that if he was going to be caring for the girl from now on, he should know more about her medications. "So, um… what do you take, if you don't mind me asking?"

"One for my anxiety and depression," Loan replied. "One for my OCD. Another one just to… even me out. The last two are to counteract the side effects of the first three." Loan let out a small sigh. "I'm… a bit of a mess."

"Nah," Her father assured her. "There's nothing wrong with it. I take medication too, y'know?"

"You do…?" Loan looked over to him.

"Nothing major, though. Just to regulate my blood pressure." Lincoln explained. "But… I do need it. So I can understand."

"I see." Loan glanced back towards the TV. It was the scene where Kaori was nearly assaulted by the Clown gang… surprisingly, such scenes never really bothered her. She was able to distinguish between reality and fiction quite well. She didn't like the word itself, though; she could bear it, but whenever she heard it, be it in a movie or in real life, a chill ran up her spine.

While she was distracted, Lincoln couldn't help but take note of her slovenly, unkempt appearance… even after the change of clothes. "Sooo… OCD, huh?"

Loan gave a short laugh under her breath. "I know. People usually think it's weird… but it's not really like how they show it in the movies. Some people feel like they have to keep everything clean… I don't." The young woman scratched her cheek. "I… don't like mirrors. Or stairs. And I need to take my pills a certain way, or I get… antsy. There's a few other things too, but they're minor." Lincoln looked as though he were about to speak, but she continued. "You don't need to worry about that, though. I can cope with it." Lincoln nodded; Lori  _had_ said that she managed her OCD well.

"I'm not too worried," Lincoln said. "But you can tell me if something's bothering you, too. I'm… new to all this, but I'll try my best."

"I know," Loan smiled. "You're… a nice person, uncle Lincoln."

"I try, at least…" Lincoln chuckled. "I just want to do right by you."

The two continued watching the movie in silence for a bit. "I'm… glad you like this kind of stuff," Loan said. "Anime and video games and stuff, I mean… mom never did."

"Well, I dunno 'bout that…" Said her father. "She actually used to be pretty damn good at Turbo Fighter back in the day."

"Really…?  _Mom?_ " Loan asked in disbelief.

"Oh yeah. I only beat her a few times… flukes, mostly." Lincoln scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "I still play, though… even though the new ones aren't so good, anymore."

"I'm terrible at Turbo Fighter," Loan admitted. "I'm really good at Beastborne, though."

"Ugh,  _I'm_ terrible at  _that._ " Lincoln groaned. "I'm still stuck at the cathedral… I've been picking away at it for  _months_  with no progress."

"I could help," Loan offered. "I'd, um… I'd like to play some games with you, sometime… if you want, that is."

"I'd like that," Lincoln said with a smirk. The two went back to watching as Tetsuo escaped from the hospital, slaughtering anyone that got in his way.

"Um…" Loan began, looking down at her lap. "Mom… told you what happened to me, didn't she…"

"…Yeah." Lincoln frowned. "I'm… sorry."

"Don't be," Loan whispered. "You didn't have anything to do with it… besides, the same happened to you, right…?"

"W-well, I guess…" Lincoln muttered. "I… don't think it could compare, though." He figured it was best not to mention the fact that, at some level… he had  _enjoyed_ it. "Loan, look…" He sighed. "I'm sorry I… hadn't been there for you. I know it's not my fault," He cut in as Loan opened her mouth to speak. "But I'm sorry anyway."

"It's okay." Loan folded her hands in her lap, twiddling her thumbs. "Uh… don't take this the wrong way… but I'm still not sure if I… made the right choice. This is… a lot, for me." Rather than taking offense, Lincoln gave his daughter a supportive, understanding smile.

"I wouldn't expect you to." He assured her. "This is a big change. But I won't force you to stay… if you decide you'd rather go with your mother, I'll understand."

"I… I know." Said Loan, barely above a whisper. "But I won't. I made my choice, and if I went back now… there'd be no point to any of this."

Lincoln pursed his lips in thought. "Loan… we may not really know each other, but for what it's worth… I'm proud of you." Loan glanced at him again, wearing a look of surprise upon her face. "You… made a big step today. For better or for worse, I can't say… but regardless of the past, I'm glad to finally have you in my life." Loan seemed stunned by his words… this man didn't even  _know_ her, and yet he accepted her. He  _wanted_  her here, even knowing how damaged she was. A smile spread across the girl's face… shaky, but genuine.

"…Th-thank you, uncle Lincoln…"

"You… don't need to thank me," He replied. "And you don't need to call me that, anymore. You can call me dad… if you want to, anyway."

"O-oh… right... " Loan mumbled sheepishly. "I-I mean… thank you. Dad." Her face scrunched up slightly as the words left her mouth; she bit her lip, looking away from the man. "…Dad…"

"Loan…?" Lincoln frowned, leaning forward as he noticed tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah…" The overwhelmed girl said softly as it began to set in. "I-it's just… you're my dad," She choked. "I… I have a  _dad._ "

Lincoln smiled, feeling his own eyes growing damp. He sniffed, quickly thumbing the side of his nose. "…And I have a daughter."

Loan nodded. She began to gasp in small, short breaths… and then, the dam burst. She threw herself into her father's arms, sobbing openly into his chest. He wrapped his arms around the girl, holding her tightly against him; he wanted to cry as well, but he managed to hold back his tears for her sake. She felt so small in his arms, so fragile… and yet, she was a stronger person than he could ever hope to be. She'd endured so much. She'd  _suffered_ so much.

But he wouldn't let anyone hurt her again.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Q&A
> 
> Q: Is this continuing/is this a one-shot?
> 
> A: This is one I get on a lot of my works. General rule of thumb with me: if it says 'The End' at the bottom, it is complete. If not, it is ongoing. This does not necessarily mean I won't do a sequel at some point, and in fact I might even decide to continue a one-shot if I feel it has somewhere to go. In any case, this rule is in effect here, too... this fic is far from over!
> 
> Q: Will the other siblings be involved?
> 
> A: I use characters as I need them, or at least if I feel I can do something interesting or funny with them. I never want to insert a character just for the sake of doing so, though I do try to at least mention what they're up to if the opportunity presents itself. Admittedly, I'm better at writing some more than others... Luan in particular is a challenge for me, hence why her role in my stories has been fairly limited thus far. Definitely expect to see at least some of Lincoln's sisters appear!
> 
> Q: Will you ever use the other sin kids?
> 
> A: As I mentioned, I am not particularly a fan of most of the sin kids... that said, should I write a fic where Lincoln has a child with one of his sisters, I will use them as that's what is expected; I know fully well that the fandom gets pretty pissy when new kids are created. However, I've recently warmed up to both Lupa and Lemy, so who knows... I can think of one story that might be due for a sequel. ;)


	3. Packin' up

Ronnie was not having a good night's sleep.

She frowned as she glanced over at the empty space beside her. She missed his warmth, his presence, his embrace… she always did when this sort of thing happened. Over the years she'd come to understand the cycle of these arguments: they would fight, even if one of them  _knew_ they were wrong they'd continue to press the issue, they'd fume on their own for a while and then the next morning they'd make up. She'd once asked her mother-in-law if this was normal for a married couple, and she'd been assured that it was. Still… it didn't make her feel much better. She'd never seen Lincoln so  _furious_  before.

Ronnie sighed as she turned onto her side. Quite frankly, she was  _still_ mad with her husband… he had completely disregarded her feelings and made a reckless decision on his own. He had always been one driven more by emotion than logic, but  _this_ was going too far. Yes, Loan was his daughter, but that didn't change the fact that she was mentally ill. To accept such a massive responsibility without hesitation was a stupid choice, one that her husband had no right to make without at least discussing it with her.

However, that wasn't to say  _she_ hadn't been in the wrong as well.

Ronnie knew she had crossed the line. She'd been unfair to the poor girl…  _beyond_ unfair. She'd called her a  _thing._ She hadn't even meant to… it had simply been in the heat of the moment. She didn't  _actually_ think that.

…Right?

Ronnie felt a pit in her stomach. She didn't hate Loan. A small part of her resented the girl perhaps, but that was more due to  _what_  she was rather than  _who_  she was. In truth, she liked Loan well enough… despite her instabilities, she seemed like a sweet girl. To disregard her as a human being just because of the circumstances of her birth was a disgusting act, and Ronnie knew this. Loan had never asked for this… she'd never asked to be born of such a sinful union.

There was one thing Lincoln had said that still weighed heavily on her mind.  _If she had been yours and Bobby's, you'd do no different._ Ronnie couldn't say that she would… nor could she say that she  _wouldn't._ It was such an absurd hypothesis that she couldn't even begin to consider it. But one thing was clear: what bothered Ronnie the most wasn't that Loan existed.

It was who her mother was.

Ronnie grumbled in annoyance as she glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was nearly five A.M… as much as she wanted to get in another hour or two of sleep, she knew she wouldn't be able to. With a grunt, she swiveled herself around to sit on the side of her bed. She rubbed her bleary, tired eyes; she figured as long as she was up, she may as well get an early start on breakfast. Ronnie forced herself to get up, sliding her feet into her slippers before heading out to the living room.

The sight that greeted her stopped her dead in her tracks.

Lincoln and Loan were seated beside one another, fast asleep; they were both leaning against each other, the afghan lying askew across their laps. Ronnie's eyes narrowed. For a moment, all she could see was her husband and that  _bitch_ snuggled up together.

But only for a brief, fleeting moment.

As much as she looked like her, that girl was  _not_ his sister. She was his  _daughter,_ andwhether or not she was Ronnie's did not change that fact. And seeing them like this… seeing that scared, nervous wreck of a girl sleeping peacefully alongside her father… if she were to be completely honest, it was downright adorable.

Ronnie was  _still_ mad, but at some level she could understand. For twenty-one years this girl had been virtually unknown to Lincoln, and now, as if guided by fate, she had entered his life. The same was true for Loan as well: she'd just discovered a father she never knew she had. Whether or not Ronnie approved, Loan was here now and she wasn't about to force the girl to leave… besides, she and Lincoln both deserved a chance to know one another.

Ronnie sighed softly as she headed to the kitchen. She'd have to make a good breakfast today.

 

* * *

 

Lincoln's dream started out pleasant enough. He was making love to his wife… she straddled his waist, bucking her hips against him in ecstasy. Lincoln threw his head back against the pillow, shutting his eyes as he thrust his hips up to meet hers.  _"Fffuck…"_ He hissed.

" _That's right…"_ Ronnie cooed.  _"That's right… feels good, doesn't it…?"_  He was about to respond, but something seemed… off.

That wasn't Ronnie's voice.

Lincoln opened his eyes to find not his wife, but  _Lori_ riding him… not as she was  _then_ , but as she was  _now._ She looked down at him with that same hunger in her eyes she'd had all those years ago. He tried to scream, to throw her off, to do  _something_ to stop this, but he wasn't in control of his own body; in fact, to his horror, he was  _still_ thrusting against her, his hands planted firmly on her waist.

" _Yeah… you love it, don't you?"_ His sister hissed.  _"You LOVE it!"_

" _Yes…"_ He found himself responding, despite his best efforts to say otherwise. Lori let out a low chuckle, stopping her assault long enough to lean over and give him a deep, passionate kiss… one he found himself returning without hesitation.

He could taste the alcohol on her tongue.

The kiss broke.  _"Fuck me, little brother…"_ She whispered into his ear.  _"FUCK me."_

Lincoln awoke with a jolt, his eyes snapping open instantly. His chest heaved with deep, ragged breaths; his heart was racing, and his body was coated in a cold sweat. The shaken man swallowed, then took a deep breath to steady his nerves. To his relief he was back in his living room, the TV idly displaying the GetFlix main menu. He realized he must have fallen asleep during the movie.

As his senses returned to him, he became aware of a light pressure against his side… he glanced over, only to see the sleeping face of Loan inches away from his. Lincoln nearly screamed before realizing that the girl beside him was not his sister, but his  _daughter._ He let out a soft groan, rubbing his tired eyes. This was  _not_ how Lincoln had hoped to start his day.

Carefully as he could manage, Lincoln eased the sleeping girl onto the sofa as he got up. He was sweaty now, and his argument with Ronnie had given him no opportunity to change out of his clothes from the day prior. He figured a shower might ease his rattled nerves.

Lincoln entered his bedroom to find that his wife was nowhere to be seen. He figured she was probably in the kitchen… that, or she'd walked out on him. He shook the thought aside; as bad as their fight had been, he still loved her, and he was sure she still loved him.

Well, he  _hoped,_ at least.

He stripped off his clothes and chucked them in the hamper before stepping into the bathroom. This was one of many welcome changes from his childhood home… it had always baffled him that there had been only  _one_ bathroom for  _six_ bedrooms, let alone that it was  _upstairs_ of all places. It was bad enough for him and his sisters, but he couldn't imagine how frustrating it must have been for his parents to go upstairs every time they needed to take a piss.

Normally Lincoln would wait for the water to get warm before stepping into the shower, but not today: this time, he turned the handle to its coldest setting. The icy water sent a jolt through his body, waking him up instantly. This was what he  _needed_ right now… something to take his mind off the horrible dream he'd just experienced.

Well… if only it had  _worked._

Lincoln rarely had dreams. Or, rather, he  _did,_ but he rarely recalled them. He  _used_ to, and he wasn't sure exactly what had changed that nor when… but he could count the number of dreams he remembered within the last ten years on one hand. But this time? This time, he could remember every detail vividly, as though it were burned directly into his mind.

He hadn't really stopped to consider the reality of the situation at the time… it had been such a jarring revelation that he had barely been able to process it, especially with Loan in the picture. But now that the initial shock had worn off, it was  _really_ starting to sink in. Lori had  _raped_  him.

But only because he  _let_  her.

Lincoln's eyes narrowed. He tried to tell himself that he couldn't have helped it, that he had just been a boy going through puberty, but it did little to ease his troubled mind. He could have run. He didn't. He could have screamed for help. He didn't.

He just… let it happen.

He knew he had fought it at first, but the more he thought about it the worse he felt. He should have kicked Lori out as soon as she touched him… why didn't he? Because he felt sorry for her?

Or was it because he wanted it from the start?

Lincoln felt sick to his stomach. Even if it  _was_ twenty-one years ago, it was still fresh in his mind; he knew it was absurd, but he couldn't help but feel like he cheated on Ronnie.  _Don't think about it,_ he told himself.  _It's in the past. Don't think about it. Don't think about it. Don't think about it._

He hung his head, letting the ice-cold water splash across the back of his neck. Quite frankly, he could barely even feel it anymore. With a small sigh, Lincoln turned off the faucet and stepped out of the shower. He couldn't even remember whether or not he had actually washed himself, but right now he didn't particularly care. He toweled himself off before heading back into the bedroom to get dressed.

Lincoln returned to the living room to find that Loan had woken up… for lack of a better term. She was sitting upright, yes, but she seemed completely out of it; she was squinting to the point that her eyes were nearly shut, and her head was bobbing back and forth slightly. "Uh… mornin', Loan." He greeted his daughter. "You doing alright, there?" She turned her head towards him slightly and a sleepy grin spread across her face.

"Heeeeyyyy uncle… dad…" She mumbled, giving a small wave. Lincoln couldn't help but chuckle under his breath; he supposed 'uncle dad' was a fair enough assessment. Loan yawned and glanced around the room, her brow furrowing in confusion. "This… isn't my room…"

"You're in the living room, remember?" Her father reminded her. Loan rubbed her eyes and then blinked a few times.

"Right…" She said as the previous night's events returned to her. She never thought she'd have fallen asleep watching Akira, especiallywhen she'd just taken her meds… though she supposed it  _had_ been an exhausting day. "What time is it?"

"About six or so, I think…" Lincoln replied.

Loan seemed a bit surprised. "That early…? Usually I wake up at… noon or so." She said with a self-depreciating chuckle.

"Night owl, huh?" Lincoln wasn't particularly surprised… he hadn't been too different himself during his college years. Just as his daughter was about to respond, the  _clank_ of a pan from the kitchen nearly made her jump out of her seat. "…Guess that's Ronnie." Lincoln muttered. He sighed, scratching the back of his head; he supposed he'd have to talk to her. "Hey, Loan…" He began. "How about you go take a shower before breakfast?"

"A shower…?" Loan frowned, sniffing at herself. "Is it that bad?"

"It's… a bit rough, yeah." Lincoln admitted.

"Oh… sorry." Loan mumbled sheepishly; she bathed even less frequently than she changed clothes. She supposed that both she and her mother had simply gotten used to the smell, but now she was living under someone else's roof… the last thing she wanted was to be discourteous. "I'll… do that, then." The young woman said as she got to her feet. She made her way back upstairs, and Lincoln couldn't help but notice that she kept her eyes focused on the steps beneath her as she did so. He could see her mouth moving slightly as well, so he could only assume that this was part of her OCD. He shrugged it off and headed for the kitchen; he figured he should trust her claim that she had it under control.

Ronnie was hard at work mixing her signature waffle batter. It was one of her specialties, and Lincoln wasn't quite sure how she did it… she kept her recipe a secret even from him. What he  _did_ know was that she made the best damn waffles he'd ever eaten.

He hesitated at the door, unsure of how exactly he should start this conversation. Their fight had gotten…  _heated,_ to say the least. But he knew he'd have to confront this  _now,_ before Loan or, God forbid,  _Bobby_  ended up in the midst of it. "Uh… hey." He said. Ronnie stopped mixing for a moment, turning her head towards him slightly… not enough to even see her face.

"…Morning." She replied, before returning to her work. Lincoln took a few moments to consider his words before taking a deep breath.

"Look, Ronnie-"

"No," Ronnie sighed, setting down the bowl. "Me first." She turned around to look at her husband, her expression hard to read… perhaps angry, perhaps remorseful. Maybe a little bit of both. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said such horrible things about Loan. I don't hate her, Lincoln. I hate  _Lori,_ and I let that get the best of me. So… I apologize for that."

Lincoln was about to tell her that he wasn't the one she needed to apologize to, but Loan didn't  _know…_ and quite frankly, it was probably for the best that she didn't find out. Instead, he simply gave a small nod.

"Loan's a good person," Ronnie continued. "But that doesn't change the fact that she's got…  _issues._  Issues that I'm not sure you'll be able to deal with. You had no right to make such a big decision on your own, and I stand by that."

Lincoln frowned. "…She's my daughter, Ronnie."

"I know." Ronnie said softly. "That's why I'm going to give this a chance, at least. She deserves it.  _You_ deserve it. And honestly, I'd rather have her  _here_  than in  _Lori's_ hands."

"…Thank you." Lincoln said with a smile. "And… I'm sorry, too. For screaming at you, I mean." His wife shot him an annoyed look, and he rolled his eyes. " _And_ for not discussing things with you."

"That's better," Ronnie huffed. "Just… I hope you know what you're doing, Lincoln. What happened to her last night was terrifying. I… don't want Bobby to be exposed to something like that." Lincoln had to agree with his wife on that point.

"I don't think that's going to be a problem. She's like a different person when she's on her meds," Lincoln explained. "Anyway… I'll talk to Bobby. I've got a  _lot_  to explain to him, huh…" He added with a chuckle. Ronnie narrowed her eyes.

"Watch what you say, Lincoln. He's too young to know about…  _that._ "

"I know, I know, I'll… dance around it, somehow." Lincoln assured her. He had no idea just  _how_ he was going to 'dance around' Bobby's cousin suddenly being his sister, but he'd figure it out.

…Probably.

"So… forgive me?" Lincoln asked, holding out his arms for a hug. Ronnie pursed her lips, then shrugged.

"Fine… I forgive you, you idiot." Ronnie sighed, embracing her husband.

"I forgive you too," Lincoln said. "Everything's going to be-"

"But no sex for a week."

"Oh, come  _on…_ " Lincoln groaned.

 

* * *

 

Loan grumbled under her breath as she pushed her wet hair away from her eyes. She was not a fan of bathing. She understood it was a necessity, of course… but she hated getting wet, and she hated being naked even more than that. Still, at least the warm water felt nice on her body.

She looked down, noticing the dark streaks of dirt and grime swirling their way down the drain with the rest of the water. Her father had been right... it  _was_  pretty bad. Thinking back, she couldn't actually remember  _when_ she had showered last. She was certain, at least, that it had been within the past week.

Well…  _pretty_ sure.

_**You really ARE fucking disgusting, aren't you?** _

In any case, she'd have to get used to making this a regular habit. Different house, different rules, after all… she didn't want to be more of a bother than she already was.

_**As if that were possible.** _

Loan sighed, taking a moment to clear her mind. Meds or not, the intrusive thoughts would come and go… sometimes it felt as though there were a whole other person in there, trying its best to drag her down to a dark place. She'd learned over the years that it was best to ignore it, though sometimes that could be a difficult thing to do. For now, at least, there was a task at hand to keep her distracted.

Loan picked up the shampoo bottle sitting on the counter. Unsurprisingly, it was children's shampoo. She figured Bobby was probably the only person to use this bathroom. This didn't really matter too much to her… she couldn't imagine that children's shampoo was much different from regular shampoo. Still, it wasn't like she had much of a choice.

She wasn't about to use his bar of soap, though. That'd be weird.

_**God forbid you did something WEIRD, right?** _

Once she was done, she stepped out of the shower and grabbed a dry towel off the rack. She had to admit, she  _did_ feel somewhat refreshed… maybe it was just due to the comfortable environment. Either way, she supposed she could get used to this.

Loan began to towel herself off, starting with her hair; she had a lot of it, of course. It wasn't like she had the courage to go to a barber shop, and her mother just tried to make it look like  _hers,_ which Loan definitely didn't want. So she'd taken the task on herself, which consisted of nothing more than letting it grow until it bothered her and then shearing it off right above her shoulders. Granted, this always resulted in an uneven, sloppy cut, but it hardly mattered… her hair was an unkempt and tangled mess even at the best of times.

Loan tossed her hair back and then moved on to her body. This part always made her feel unusual, for reasons she couldn't explain… particularly around her breasts and nether regions. Trauma or not, she would hope that her  _own_ hands wouldn't be an issue. Besides, it wasn't like she didn't have  _urges_  from time to time, even if she rarely acted on them.

_**You know why you don't.** _

Once she was dry, Loan let out a sigh and ventured a look in the mirror. She definitely looked a bit better… or at least  _cleaner._  Her eyes scanned her nude body; the curves she'd inherited from her mother were completely negated by her borderline malnourished frame. Despite her near-constant consumption of junk food, she was so thin that her ribcage was visible through her pallid skin. Her mother always told her she was beautiful, but as far as she was concerned that couldn't be further from the truth.

_**Maybe you could be, if you gave a shit.** _

She quickly snapped her gaze away from the mirror. She'd seen enough. She had to get dressed.

It was then that Loan realized she had forgotten to grab a change of clothes from her room. She groaned and picked up the clothes she had already been wearing. She felt that this somewhat defeated the purpose of a shower in the first place, but she wasn't about to walk out wearing nothing but a towel. Besides… she'd only been wearing them since last night. How bad could it be? They certainly didn't  _smell_ bad, at least. Loan shrugged and slipped on her boxers, followed by her pajama bottoms.

She had only just pulled her t-shirt over her head when the door opened.

Loan yelped and pulled her shirt the rest of the way down as quickly as possible. Before her stood none other than Bobby, his eyes wide as dinner plates and his face as red as a tomato. Loan was no less embarrassed than he was, and for several moments the two simply stared at each other in silence.

_**Well, good fucking job. You flashed a child.** _

_No,_ she thought.  _I was too fast. He didn't see._

He did.

"U-um…" Loan stammered. "Good morning."

"…Hi," Came the young boy's mumbled response. Bobby averted his gaze from his cousin, grinding his foot against the ground sheepishly. He knew fully well what breasts looked like… he  _had_ a computer, after all. But he'd never seen them in person before, and certainly not so  _sizable._ Quite frankly, he had no idea what the heck he was supposed to say now. Then again, it wasn't like he would have much to say to the strange girl anyway.

Another awkward silence fell over the two. Loan couldn't help but steal short glances in his direction; he was wearing red pajamas patterned with blue and gray rocket ships. Between that and his shy, withdrawn demeanor, it took every ounce of restraint Loan had in her not to scoop him up and hug him right then and there.

_**Sure, go ahead. Make this even more uncomfortable.** _

"Uh… do you know what I'm supposed to do with this…?" Loan asked, raising her used towel.

"Hamper…" Bobby replied in a small voice.

"I, er… I don't have one."

"…You can use the one in my room, then." Bobby muttered. "I, uh… I need to go, so…"

"O-oh… right. Go ahead!" Loan hurried past him, and Bobby quickly shuffled into the bathroom.

"…Sorry." He said before shutting the door. "Should have knocked…" And then, Loan was alone.

"Ugh…" Loan groaned, burying her face in her palm. She'd been so used to having her own bathroom that she completely forgot to lock the door. She  _would_ be slightly relieved that it had been Bobby as opposed to someone else, but she'd probably just traumatized the poor boy.

_**Don't worry… this is only your second day. I'm sure you'll do worse.** _

Loan tried her best to put it out of her mind as she headed into Bobby's room.

It seemed like a pretty standard bedroom for a young boy, at least as far as Loan could tell; she'd never been in one before, after all. The walls were painted a dark blue and decorated with numerous posters, mostly for sci-fi series such as Star Wars, Godzilla and, to her surprise, Star Trek. Not even one of the reboots, but the  _original_ Star Trek. It looked like an old poster too, so either it had been handed down or he'd actually gone out of his way to acquire it.

In fact, even a cursory glance around the room made it readily apparent that the boy loved science fiction. His bedsheets had a rocket ship pattern not too different from his pajamas, there was a model of the Millennium Falcon hanging from the ceiling fan, and lying on the small desk against the back wall was a half-finished model robot… more specifically, a  _Gundam_  model. Loan had tried and failed to assemble a few herself in the past, her shaky hands resulting in far too many broken parts.

Loan spotted the hamper next to a bookcase and walked over, dropping the towel into it. She couldn't help but take a glance at the bookcase; the top shelf mostly held an assortment of toys, figures and completed models. The other shelves, however, held only books… it came as little surprise that they were mainly in the science fiction genre. But what  _was_ surprising was the selection itself: alongside such age-appropriate titles as A Wrinkle in Time and Escape to Witch Mountain were far more advanced novels, several of which Loan herself had read in the past. She spotted Neuromancer, Ender's Game, various collections of short stories from the likes of Ellison and Asimov… too many to count. For a seven-year-old, it was impressive to say the least.

Loan figured she'd snooped around long enough. She exited the room, content that she at least shared some common interests with the boy… perhaps she'd be able to get him to open up to her a bit. He  _was_  her brother, after all.

 _Wait,_ she thought.  _He's my brother. I have a little brother!_ Loan was barely able to suppress a squeal of delight. She'd always wanted a younger sibling, after all. Now she finally had one, and a downright adorable one at that.

_**Yeah, and you already showed him your tits. Off to a great start.** _

_Oh… right._  Loan sighed. She made a mental note to apologize to the boy later, for all the good it would do.

 

* * *

 

As if the previous night's dinner wasn't awkward enough, breakfast managed to  _top_ that. As before, Bobby remained completely silent, his attention focused on his waffles. However, he was still noticeably flustered, and his eyes kept flicking in Loan's direction. The young woman did her best to ignore it as she finished cutting up her waffle; she preferred cutting up everything  _before_ eating, though most people seemed to find this weird. As far as she was concerned, she was just spending a bit more time up front to save herself time later. Of course, this  _did_ sometimes result in her food getting cold, but she didn't particularly mind.

"…Oh my God." Loan exclaimed as she took her first bite. It was delicious… possibly the best thing she'd ever eaten. Lightly crisp on the outside, soft and fluffy on the inside, and perfectly sweet on its own even  _without_ syrup. Lincoln chuckled at her reaction.

"Good, isn't it?" He asked.

"Y-yeah…" Loan muttered. "Are all waffles this good…?"

"No, just mine." Ronnie said proudly. "You've never had waffles?"

"Not really…" Loan sighed. "Just frozen ones. Neither me or mom know how to cook."

"…Huh." Ronnie wasn't particularly surprised by that… Lori hardly seemed like a homemaker, after all. "Well, as long as you're going to be living here, I promise I'll keep you well-fed." She said with a smirk.

Bobby glanced up. Something about what his mother said sounded  _off…_ she said  _living_ here, not  _staying_ here. Bobby knew the difference.

"By the way, Loan…" Lincoln began. "I was thinking we could go get the rest of your stuff today. If you're up to it, I mean."

"Today…?" Loan frowned slightly. She didn't really want to see her mother right now… or any time soon, for that matter. But she  _did_ need to get her things. Heck, she only had two days' worth of clean clothes left. Somewhat reluctantly, she nodded. "…O-okay. Um… it's going to take a while, though. I… have lots of stuff."

"That's fine," Lincoln said with a reassuring smile. "It's Saturday… got all the time in the world." Loan returned his smile. Bobby, however, only grew more perturbed.

"Why would she need to get her things…?"

His parents exchanged a glance. "Er, well…" Lincoln mumbled. For her part, Loan just bit her lip and did her best not to look at the boy. She'd completely forgotten that he had no idea what was going on; as far as he knew Loan was just his cousin, and she'd only be staying for a few days. She was glad she hadn't unknowingly let something slip earlier. He was already wary of her  _now…_ no telling how he'd take a bombshell like  _that._

_**Might as well have. You let two 'bombshells' slip already.** _

"I'll… explain after breakfast," Lincoln told his son. Bobby stared at him in silence for a moment, and then briefly glanced at Loan.

"…Fine." He mumbled, returning to his food.

Once their meal was finished, Bobby quickly scurried out of the dining room as he had the previous night. Loan was about to gather up her plate and glass, but Lincoln stopped her. "I've got it," He said. "You go get ready, okay? And, uh… call your mom to let her know we're coming. I don't have her number."

"Oh… right. Okay. Thank you, unc-" Loan caught herself. "…Dad." She exchanged a grin with her father before heading off herself. It would take a bit for her to get used to, but she had to admit… the word felt good on her tongue.

Lincoln gathered up the remaining tableware and brought them to his wife in the kitchen. Normally, he'd help her wash up, but he figured he should have a talk with Bobby before Loan came back down. "Here you go, honey." He said as he set them down on the counter.

"Thanks." Ronnie replied; she paused from her cleaning for a moment and turned towards her husband. "Lincoln… are you sure it's okay to do this right now?"

"Do what…?"

"Go to the city," She said. "You're already behind on your work, aren't you?" Lincoln winced; she wasn't wrong. He'd messed up  _twice_ the past week, drawing line art on the same layer as the pencils… hours of work, down the drain. Taking a day off meant he had almost no chance of meeting his weekly quota.

"…It's fine," Lincoln said, waving it off. "I'll just pull a few all-nighters this week."

" _Lincoln,_ " Ronnie huffed. "You  _know_ I hate it when you do that…"

"I know, I know…" Lincoln muttered. "Trust me, I'm not crazy about it either. But she's-"

"Your daughter. I know." The Latina sighed. "Just don't push yourself too hard, Lincoln. You're not the young man you used to be." Lincoln raised an eyebrow.

"…We're the same age, honey."

"Yes, but  _I_ take care of myself. Speaking of which…" Ronnie poked her husband's slightly-protruding gut. "You're getting fat, dear. We're going to have to work on that."

Lincoln frowned, giving his paunch a squeeze. "Is it that bad?"

"It will be, if we don't do something about it. Now, go." Ronnie ordered, pointing to the door. "Talk to your son."

"Alright, alright, I'm going…" Lincoln groaned as he headed for the door.

"And watch what you say!" Ronnie called after him. Lincoln just rolled his eyes; sometimes he felt like his wife had no confidence in him.

Not that she didn't have  _reason_  not to, of course.

Lincoln found his son already waiting for him in the living room; he was seated on the couch, twiddling his thumbs in apprehension. Clearly, he wasn't willing to wait any longer for an explanation than he had to… as shy as he was, the boy could be surprisingly persistent when he wanted something.

"So, Bobby…" Lincoln began as he sat down on the couch near his son. Quite frankly, he wasn't really sure where to  _begin._ "Um… what do you think of Loan? Do you like her?"

"…She's… okay, I guess." What more could he say? He'd barely spoken to the girl.

"That's good, that's good." In all honesty 'she's okay' wasn't the answer Lincoln had hoped to hear, but coming from his son he supposed it was good enough. "Loan's… going to be living with us from now on."

Bobby frowned. "For how long…?"

"For… forever, I guess." Lincoln replied. "Or at least until she's ready not to."

" _Forever?_ " Bobby's brow furrowed; that had been exactly what he didn't want to hear. "But… why?"

"Well…" Lincoln sighed, scratching the back of his head. "It… it turns out that she's my daughter. And  _your_  sister."

Silence. Bobby stared at him as though he were speaking another language; he could barely even process what he'd just heard. "That's… I-I don't have a sister…"

"Well… you do."

"But… but she's my  _cousin._ " Bobby said. "And she's too  _old,_ isn't she…?" Lincoln let out a small groan. He should have known this wouldn't be so easy… his son had always been a very inquisitive boy.

"Look… she's your sister. Let's leave it at that." Lincoln knew this wouldn't be enough to satisfy the boy, but he had to put a stop to things here. "Now, listen… I know this is a lot to take in so suddenly. Honestly, it was a shock for me too… but she's here now, and she's going to be staying for as long as she wants." Bobby didn't reply. He simply sat there in silence, his eyes downcast as the reality of the situation hit him. He had a sister… a sister that  _clearly_  wasn't his mom's daughter. She was going to be living with them. Forever.

Right  _next_ to him.

"I… I don't, um…" Bobby stammered. "She's weird."

"Now, Bobby… that's not nice." Lincoln scolded his son.

"But she is," Bobby continued. "She's a grown-up, but she doesn't really act like one. Why is she like that…?"

"Loan's been through a lot," Lincoln explained. "Stuff I can't really talk about until you're older. She's kind of… mixed up right now, but she's a good person. Just give her a chance, okay?" His son just gave a quiet, noncommittal grunt in response. "Bobby, look…." Lincoln sighed. "I know this is a big change for all of us, but it's a big change for her, too. Like I said, she's been through a lot… so try to make her feel welcome, alright?" He squeezed his son's shoulder, offering him a reassuring smile.

Bobby was far from convinced. He didn't doubt that Loan was a good person… but she was still a strange woman that he'd never met before.  _Very_ strange, in fact… quite frankly, he did  _not_  want to live with this girl.

Plus, things were a bit…  _awkward,_  thanks to their earlier encounter.

"…Okay." The troubled boy grumbled. His father smiled and patted his back.

"Good." Lincoln said. "I'm sure you'll get along with her just fine. You have a lot in common." Bobby simply gave a small nod before hopping off the couch. He supposed that whether he liked it or not didn't matter… the girl was here to stay. He'd at least have to get used to it.

Bobby mulled over this as he headed back upstairs. She was weird, but she  _did_ seem nice. And he knew she liked video games and anime… so that was something, at least. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad?

Unless he walked in on her changing again…  _that_  would be pretty bad.

Bobby had just reached his bedroom door when Loan's opened. She shuffled out of her room, looking no less disheveled than before despite a change of clothes. She didn't seem to notice him at first as she was fiddling with her phone. "…Hi." He said.

" _Eep!_ " Loan jumped, nearly dropping her phone. Bobby couldn't help but jump slightly himself. The frightened girl's eyes flicked over to him, and she breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh… Bobby." She said sheepishly. "…S-sorry about that."

"…It's okay. Sorry I scared you." Bobby muttered. He took a moment to look over the girl… she definitely wasn't like any grown-up  _he'd_ met before. Unkempt hair, faded grey sweatpants, socks with  _Crocs_ , ratty old 'Doom' hoodie hiding a very ample-

Bobby averted his eyes, his cheeks reddening slightly. "Is everything okay?" Loan asked, taking notice of the boy's troubled expression. Bobby bit his lip and gave a small nod.

"Are you, um…" He mumbled, glancing back up at the girl. "Are you really my sister…?"

Loan's face brightened slightly and she gave an enthusiastic nod. "Y-yes… I am." She certainly seemed happy about it… Bobby wished he felt the same.

"…Okay." He said quietly before entering his room. "See you…" Loan was about to reply, but he shut the door.

Bobby let out a soft sigh; he knew that was a bit rude of him. It wasn't that Bobby  _tried_ to be rude… he just couldn't help it. He never knew how to talk to people he didn't already know… and even among the people he  _did_ know, there were very few that he felt completely comfortable talking to. In fact, outside of his family he really had no friends to speak of, just 'kids he talked to slightly more than others'.

Quite frankly, he didn't feel comfortable with Loan, and not just because he walked in on her changing. He didn't  _dislike_  her… but her sudden appearance in his life was disconcerting, to say the least. Bobby wasn't stupid… he knew where babies came from. He knew that the age gap between Loan and his father was  _far_ too small. He knew that it made no sense for her to be his cousin one day, and his sister the next.

And he knew that she looked almost _exactly_ like the woman that had been there last night.

Clearly there were things his father wasn't telling him, and he'd get to the bottom of it in time. For now, however, there were more pressing matters at hand…

…His Gunpla model. He wanted to finish the darn thing within the day, after all.

 

* * *

 

Loan sat in the passenger's seat of her father's SUV, watching the passing scenery much as she had the previous day; it was even raining again, though it did little to ease her apprehension. When she ran away from home, she knew it was likely that she would be dragged back before long… though she was glad the circumstances were different than expected.

_**It's a trick. He's going to leave you with her. Why wouldn't he? Nobody wants you.** _

Loan ignored her thoughts. She knew her father wouldn't do that… he seemed to like her, and she liked him. Heck, she might go so far as to say she  _loved_  the man already.

_**He'll never feel the same.** _

What concerned Loan was the prospect of seeing her mother again so soon… Loan still loved her, but she hadn't forgiven her. She wasn't even sure if she  _could;_ what Lori had done hit far too close to home for the girl.

"Loan? Are you alright?" Lincoln asked, taking notice of his daughter's tense expression. "We can turn back if you're not ready yet." Loan shook her head.

"It's alright," She assured him. "Better to… face things head-on, for once." Lincoln gave a small nod and turned his full attention to the road. If he were to be completely honest, even  _he_ wasn't too eager to see his sister again, especially not after that dream he'd had. But he figured there was no use delaying things... besides, he wanted Loan to feel at home.

The two continued their drive in silence. Despite clearly being an older car, Loan found the SUV to be more comfortable than her mother's Corvette… perhaps due to her having more leg room. Normally she preferred to sit in the back, but the rest of the car was filled with empty boxes. She could only hope that everything would fit.

She tapped her finger against the armrest in tune with her father's rock music. It sounded familiar, though she couldn't quite place it. "Um… what band is this?" She asked.

"SMOOCH," Lincoln replied, a small smirk crossing his face. "They're my favorite band… always have been. You like?"

"Yeah… they're pretty good."

"What kind of stuff do you usually listen to?" Her father asked.

"Um… little bit of everything, I guess." Loan muttered. "I don't think there's any genre I really dislike. I… listen to a lot of music from anime and video games and stuff, though."

"Well, I don't mind. Here." He handed his daughter his phone. "Put on whatever you like."

"O-oh… um, okay. Thank you." Loan flicked through his music selection. He had a lot to choose from; though his musical tastes definitely skewed towards rock, he also had various anime, game, and movie soundtracks. She put on the Killer Instinct soundtrack and handed the phone back to her father. She was terrible at the game, but she had to admit that the music was great. "I must get this from you," She said, chuckling softly. "It always drove mom crazy."

"Honestly, Ronnie's not too crazy about it either." Lincoln said. "She plays games sometimes, but for the most part she can't stand all the 'nerdy crap'. Sometimes I wonder what she sees in me at all." He shrugged and let out a sigh. "I mean, nerdy crap's kind of my whole thing… Bobby, too."

"I saw," His daughter said. "He really reads all of those books…?"

"Oh, yeah. He's always been a great reader, better than I was at his age." Lincoln scratched his cheek. "He was a preemie, so we were worried for a while… but he's a smart one, that's for sure."

Loan tilted her head slightly. "Preemie…?"

"Oh, uh… he was born earlier than expected." Lincoln explained. "They tend to have… problems. And at first, we thought he did too. He had a bit of a slow start."

"Oh…"

"He barely even spoke until he was five. He just kind of… babbled, most of the time. Then one day, he started talking normally. Just like  _that._ " Lincoln said with a snap of his fingers. "Full sentences. Proper grammar. It was like something just  _clicked._ Apparently that happens sometimes with preemies, but still… it was something else, alright."

"Wow…" Loan muttered. "He's pretty incredible, isn't he?"

Lincoln smirked and nodded. "He is. By the way…" He glanced over at his daughter. "Have you talked to Bobby at all?" Loan frowned, shaking her head slightly.

"Only… a little. I, uh… I don't think he likes me too much. At least, not yet."

"Give him time… I'm sure he likes you. This is just a lot for him right now." Lincoln assured her. "He'll come around, I promise."

"Um… dad… I don't know about that." Loan mumbled sheepishly. "Something…  _happened_ earlier…"

"Huh?" Lincoln looked over at her, cocking an eyebrow. "What happened…?" Loan immediately regretted saying anything.  _Oh God,_ she thought.  _He's going to hate me. He's going to kick me out. He's going to kick me out of the CAR and I'm going to DIE because I forgot to lock the DOOR and Bobby saw-_

_**Jesus fucking Christ, calm your tits.** _

Loan took a deep breath.  _That's right. Don't be stupid. It was an accident. Just an accident…_

"Loan…?"

" _I'MSORRY!_ " Loan blurted out suddenly, making her father jolt in his seat. "I-I forgot to lock the bathroom door and when I got out of the shower I was changing and Bobby saw me and it was my fault and I'm sorry I didn't mean for him to see me I'm not… I'm not…" To her confusion, her father didn't look angry… rather, he was  _snickering._ "U-um…"

"Oh, man…" Lincoln laughed. "Sheesh, you had me worried there for a second."

"Uh… I… what…?" Loan stammered. "B-but Bobby… he saw my-"

"Luna, Leni," Her father began, counting out each name on his fingers. "Lynn, Lori, Lola… hell, even  _mom._ I've walked in on  _all_ of them at one point or another… some of 'em more than once. And that's not counting the number of times they've walked in on  _me._ " Lincoln explained. "We forget to lock, we forget to knock, it happens. It'll probably happen again."

"…Oh."

"Trust me, he'll forget about it soon enough. You both will." Lincoln assured his daughter. "Bobby's just… well, you know. It always takes some time for him to get used to people. It was the same with the rest of our family, too. Heck… he's  _still_  a bit scared of Lucy." Lincoln paused a moment as he switched lanes to get around a slow car. "Then again… I guess most people are." Loan gave a small nod. Not that she'd actually  _met_  Lucy, but she'd heard things from her mother.

Still, she had to admit she felt better about things now. Putting it in perspective, it really wasn't that big of a deal… he'd only seen her breasts for, what, a fraction of a second? It was nothing. She was overreacting, as usual.

_**Just wait 'til your dad sees them. THAT'LL be the REAL shit-show.** _

Loan groaned, burying her face in her palm. She  _really_ wished she had brought her fidget cube.

 

* * *

 

"I trust you found the place alright?" Lori asked as she led her brother into her apartment.

Lincoln had to admit… his sister had a nice place. Much like her car, the entire apartment was sleek and dark, decked out in modern-styled furniture and art. He knew she made good money, but he could only imagine how much a place like this must have cost… and how much she'd be making at her  _new_ job to leave  _this_ behind.

"Um, yeah… Loan pointed me in the right direction." He muttered. He was finding it hard to look at his sister, and not just because of the dream… her lip was terribly swollen, and apparently the cut had been bad enough to require a few stitches. The bruise on the side of her head was far more apparent, too. He could hardly blame Ronnie for attacking her, but he couldn't help but feel a bit bad about it.

For her part, Loan trailed behind the two, noticeably keeping her distance from her mother. She kept her gaze firmly planted on the floor and her hands jammed deep into her pockets. She didn't want to be here. It felt so… confining. It always had, but even more so  _now._ Between the low ceiling and the presence of her mother, she felt as though she were being smothered. She could swear that the ceiling was coming down on her and it was going to crush her and she couldn't breathe and she-

"Loan?"

Lincoln's voice snapped the girl out of her daze. She glanced up to see that they were standing outside her bedroom door… her father was smiling warmly at her. "Would you like to show me your room?" She couldn't help but smile herself when he asked like that.

"O-ok." Loan muttered as she shuffled past them and gripped the doorknob. "It's, um… it's pretty bad, though."

"I'm sure it's not  _that-_ " Lincoln's words died on his lips as Loan opened the door. 'Pretty bad' was an understatement… her room was absolutely disgusting. The floor was littered with junk, ranging from dirty clothes to empty chip bags to wadded-up, grease-stained paper towels; the corners of the room were especially bad, with trash piled up to knee-height in some spots. The walls were lined with anime and video game posters, as well as shelves so overstuffed with figurines and trinkets that Lincoln was shocked none had fallen over… actually, many  _had_ fallen over, the thick layers of dust blanketing them showing that Loan had just never bothered to pick them up.

Her bed was completely unmade and it looked as though the sheets hadn't been changed in far too long. Her desk was no better than the floor, covered with empty Chinese takeout boxes and soda cans. The room had a stale, musty odor, no doubt a horrible potpourri of old snack food and unwashed clothes. It was the sort of mess Lincoln had always seen  _portrayed_ in film and TV but never thought was actually possible in real life. "Jesus Christ…" He muttered.

"Disgusting, isn't it?" Lori sighed, withdrawing a cigarette case from her breast pocket. "I used to try and keep it clean, but as you can see it was a wasted effort."

"…I'm sorry…" Loan mumbled sheepishly. "It just kept… piling up, and I guess I just got  _used_ to it. U-um… I promise I won't let my new room get this bad!" She assured him. Her father only gave a small nod, coughing into his fist as he stepped into the room. He knew how that could be… procrastination was a slippery slope. He'd let things go to shit himself when he first started living on his own. Still, even at his worst it had never gotten anything like  _this._

"Well, I'll… I'll leave you to it, then." Lori said quietly. Lincoln wasn't particularly bothered by her not offering to help… Loan didn't seem to want to be around her right now, and quite frankly neither did he. Besides, he could detect the sorrow in her voice… no doubt all this was still taking a toll on the woman.

"Sure. We've, uh… we've got this." He said. Lori nodded and walked out of sight. He took a deep breath before turning back to the task at hand. Loan hadn't been joking… this  _was_ going to take a while. "O-okay… I think it'd be best to start with the floor…"

For the next few hours, Lincoln and Loan worked together to sort through and organize her belongings. As she had said earlier, she had a lot… surprisingly, even amongst the mess she seemed to know where everything was.  _Unsurprisingly_ , she seemed content to just shove everything into a box. So they worked out a system: Loan would gather, Lincoln would pack.

"You have a  _Super Nintendo?_ " Lincoln said, looking the old piece of hardware over. It wasn't in the best of shape… the plastic casing had faded to an ugly yellow color, and it was mottled with baked-in dust.

"Yeah… kind of an impulse buy…" Loan chuckled. "It works, but it's  _really_ finicky. These days I mostly just emulate."

" _Thank_ you," Lincoln groaned as he placed the SNES into a box. "I've got this friend that  _swears_ by playing things on the original consoles… all he's doing is wasting time and money. Still, I'm surprised… that's  _way_  before your time, isn't it?" Loan nodded.

"I like old games," His daughter said as she dug out a storage case full of game cartridges from beneath a mountain of trash. She blew across the top, scattering dust into the air. "I like new ones too, but… it's all just the same stuff now. I wish I'd grown up back then, you know?" Loan sighed, setting the case down on the bed.

"Hey, it's not like I was around for it myself…" Lincoln replied with a smirk. "I'm not  _that_  old, you know."

"I-I know!" Loan stammered. "I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"Relax, it's fine." Her father assured her, giving a small laugh. "You've got a pretty nice selection," He said as he skimmed through her cartridges. "Aladdin's better on the Genesis, though."

Loan's demeanor changed in an instant; her eyes narrowed into tiny slits and her hands balled up into tight fists. " _...What._ "

Lincoln shrugged. "I mean, in the Genesis version you get a sword…"

"A-a  _sword_ does not make it a  _better_!" Loan cried, wildly gesturing with her hands. "The SNES version is a better-made game! Period! That's it! That's…" The young woman trailed off as she realized her father was snickering into his palm. She let out a groan and slumped forward, her face growing hot. "Sorry… I got worked up again…"

"N-no, it's…" Lincoln managed to choke out between laughs; he took a moment to compose himself before speaking again. "You're really cute, Loan."

 

* * *

 

Lori stood outside on her patio, cigarette in hand. She'd always wanted an apartment on the top floor with a balcony overlooking the city, but Loan's fear of heights had always gotten in the way of that. Now that the girl was off her hands, perhaps she could finally realize her dream in Tokyo.

At least, that's what she told herself… not that it made her feel much better about things.

Lori took a long drag from her cigarette. It was her fifth since her Lincoln and their daughter had arrived; normally she wouldn't be burning through them like this, but despite her best efforts she was finding it difficult to maintain composure. She'd checked in on them every so often, catching brief snippets of their conversations. Quite frankly, she'd never heard Loan speak so  _freely_  before… in barely even a day the girl had a better rapport with her father than she'd ever had with Lori. On one hand, she was glad… any worries she had about leaving her daughter in Lincoln's hands were easily assuaged by watching the two interact.

On the other hand, it made her feel sick.

"Since when do you smoke?" Lincoln's voice snapped her from her thoughts. Lori glanced over her shoulder to see him stepping out onto the patio, forehead slick with sweat.

"I smoke when I need to, Lincoln." She replied curtly. "Are you two finished already?"

"Nah, just taking a break," Lincoln huffed as he flopped into one of the lounge chairs. Lori grunted under her breath. She was about to tell him off for being so carefree with her furniture, but she supposed it hardly mattered now… it wasn't like she would be bringing any of it with her to Japan. Just like everything else, it would be left behind. "Mind if I bum one of those?" Lincoln asked. Lori raised an eyebrow.

"Since when do  _you_  smoke?"

"I don't, really… not anymore." Lincoln muttered with a shrug. "Still, I figured I may as well ask." Lori frowned slightly. Part of her wanted to scold him, but then again she was hardly one to talk. With a sigh, she withdrew a cigarette from her case and handed it to him along with her lighter.

"Here. Just the one." She grumbled. Lincoln took it and looked it over before placing it in his mouth. It looked a bit different from the kind he was used to… it was slightly longer and slimmer, completely white without the usual orange tip. Instead there were thin silvery stripes marking the filter, and a silver brand logo that was so overly ornate that Lincoln couldn't read it even if he tried. The strong odor of tobacco was even masked somewhat by faint undertones of vanilla. He couldn't help but chuckle under his breath as he placed it between his lips.

"Even your smokes are fancy," Lincoln said, lighting the cigarette and taking a few puffs. Lori scoffed and took back her lighter.

"My apologies for having a taste for the  _finer_ things in life." His sister replied. "What is it you do again? Doodle…  _cartoons?_ " Lincoln cocked an eyebrow and blew out a plume of smoke.

"...I do line-art. For comic books." He corrected her. "Laugh if you want, but I'm doing what I love." Lori didn't really have a comeback for that… rather, it just made her feel bad.

"…I'm sorry." She said quietly, taking a seat in the chair beside her brother's. "I'm just a bit on edge." Lincoln simply nodded. In all honesty, he wasn't particularly offended by her comment… Lori had never really thought too highly of his interests, after all.

"How're you holding up?" He asked. Lori didn't answer right away; she tapped out her ash before taking another long drag, holding it for several seconds and then exhaling.

"I, uh… stopped by the emergency room last night. Obviously." She explained, gesturing towards her stitched-up lip. "They gave me some pills for the pain. Strong stuff, too. But even with that… I couldn't sleep. Not one wink." Lori let out a humorless chuckle and tapped out some ash. "…It's funny, you know. Most of the time, she was so quiet I literally didn't even notice she was here. But now… all I can think about is that she's  _not_."

Neither said anything further for a few moments. Lincoln wasn't sure what he  _could_ say, really. It was not lost on him that Loan entering his life meant that she was effectively leaving her mother's. He couldn't even begin to imagine how he'd feel if someone were to take Bobby away from him, and he was only  _seven…_ Lori had raised her daughter alone for  _twenty-one years._ She'd told him last night that Loan was all she had, and he believed it.

"Lori, look…" Lincoln muttered. "I'm sorry. About… last night, I mean." He took another small puff of his cigarette before continuing. "Accusing you of hurting Loan. I… shouldn't have jumped to conclusions." His sister smirked slightly and shook her head.

"I can't blame you. And it's not like you were  _wrong,_ really… I've laid my hands on her more times than I can count." Lori chewed her lip in thought, her expression growing wistful. "…To this day I can't understand why I went back to the bottle. That night… that night should have been the end of it. But I went back. I went back, and I hurt my baby girl time and time again." She frowned as she glanced down at the cigarette in her hand. "At least  _this_ only hurts  _me._ "

"There's always time to-"

"I know, Lincoln. I know." Lori sighed. "'There's always time to set things right. There's always time to  _fix_  things.' It's a nice sentiment, but it's more complicated than that. I've done my best to patch up the damage I've caused, but in the end that's all I could do… patch it up. The damage still remains." Lori took a drag from her cigarette. "…Sometimes you need to replace the support structure itself."

Lori turned to her brother, a serious look in her eyes. "I had every intention of bringing Loan home with me last night, Lincoln… even  _after_  I told you the truth. But when she had that panic attack, you were able to do what I couldn't. You got  _through_  to her. After seeing that… there's no way I could have dragged her back."

"Lori, I think you're being too hard on yourself…"

"I'm not." Lori stated plainly. Lincoln was about to respond, but his sister continued. "I've been listening in, you know. You're… good with her, Lincoln. She likes you. She  _trusts_ you. You're what she'd been missing… not just a father, but a  _friend._ I've only ever been a mother, and not a very good one, at that."

"That's not true."

"Oh, please." Lori huffed. "You've seen her. You've seen how she acts around me. Chester may have broken her, but I'm the reason she was cracked to begin with. And since then, I've only made things worse." She tapped out a bit more ash. "She deserves better. She deserves the  _best._  And if that means letting her go… so be it."

Lincoln pursed his lips, mulling over his next words, but before he could say anything he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

**) hey uncle lincoln im ready 2 get back 2 work**

**) i mean only if ur ready no rush**

**) *dad lincoln**

**) *dad**

**) sry**

**) anyway ill be waiting**

**) but no rush**

**) sry**

Lincoln snickered and put his phone back in his pocket. He hadn't realized how long he'd been out there with Lori; he took one last drag from his cigarette before reaching over and grinding it out in the ash tray.

"Lori," He said as he got to his feet. "A bad mother wouldn't have tried at all."

 

* * *

 

Loan lingered in her cleared-out bedroom a moment. It was almost surreal seeing it bathed in natural sunlight like this, with the drapes pulled open for the first time since they'd moved in. Between that and the multitude of posters, she had completely forgotten that the walls were a nice periwinkle blue. Or they  _had_ been, at any rate… now they were stained, faded, and baked-in with dust. And that wasn't even mentioning the  _carpet_ ; quite frankly, Loan couldn't even tell what color it  _had_ been. Now it was just a mottled, disgusting mess of splotches and streaks. It looked like a Jackson Pollock painting… a  _bad_ one, at that.

She did a quick once-over to be sure they hadn't missed anything. She knew they hadn't, but she wanted to be sure anyway. Once she was satisfied, she picked up the last box and headed for the door. The girl paused briefly, taking one last look at the room.

For years this place had been her home… or perhaps more appropriately, her self-imposed  _prison_. She'd been happy here, for the most part. Even now, a part of her didn't want to go, but she knew that one way or another she  _had_ to: she could either follow her mother to Japan and live out the remainder of her

_**Hopefully short** _

Life the same way she  _had_ been,or set off towards an unknown future with her father. Well, she'd already made up her mind. Loan had always been one to take the path of least resistance, but not this time… this time, she was determined to see just where this new path may lead her.

_**Probably to a casket. Or the looney bin.** _

With a small sigh, Loan turned away and flicked off the light switch before leaving the room. As she walked down the hallway towards the front door, she felt that same crushing sensation again; she wondered if perhaps she'd always felt this way and just not noticed, or if the high ceilings of her father's house made her mother's apartment feel downright stifling by comparison. Possibly a bit of both. In any case, the only thing keeping her from having another panic attack was the open front door.

Sure enough, as soon as she stepped outside it was as though a great weight had been taken off her chest, and she took a deep breath. Thankfully, her father had pulled his car up as close as he could. "This the last one?" He asked as she handed the box off to him.

"Yeah… that's it." Loan replied. Lincoln somewhat awkwardly wedged the last box between two others before forcing the trunk closed. It was tight, but he'd managed to fit everything.

"Guess that's that, then…" Lincoln muttered. "We did pretty damn good, I'd say." He shot his daughter a grin that she couldn't help but return.

"Thank you for cleaning up the mess, too…"Lori said, making Loan jump; she had completely forgotten that her mother was standing nearby. "You really didn't have to do that."

"It was no problem," Lincoln assured her. "Right, Loan?"

"…Yeah." Loan mumbled under her breath, hugging her arms across her chest. "No problem…" Her eyes were downcast, and it suddenly dawned on Lori that she hadn't seen her daughter so much as  _glance_  in her direction all day. Their relationship had always carried a note of tension even at the best of times, but this was new.

"U-um…" Lori cleared her throat, doing her best to regain her composure. "Loan, sweetie… I need to talk to your father for a-"

"Okay." Loan didn't even wait for her mother to finish; she simply opened the passenger door and got into her seat, shutting it behind her. Lori sighed and turned to her brother. Lincoln couldn't help but feel sympathy for her, though he had to admit he didn't feel entirely comfortable around her either.

"So… what's up?" He asked, leaning against the side of his car.

"I'm going to call Dr. Patel on Monday," Lori said.

"Doctor… oh, you mean Loan's psychologist?" Lincoln asked.

"Psychiatrist," Lori corrected him. "Although I suppose she's a bit of both. Now, I'm sure it goes without saying, but I will not be explaining the… exact circumstances of the situation. As far as she or anyone else knows, I am simply leaving Loan in her uncle's care for the foreseeable future."

"Right…" Lincoln muttered, scratching the back of his head. In truth, he hadn't even  _thought_ about that… let alone how he was supposed to explain this to the  _rest_  of the family. He supposed Lori's version would have to do for now. "Wait… aren't there like… forms and stuff?"

Lori cocked an eyebrow. "…Forms?"

"You know… like 'legal guardian' stuff." Her brother asked. Lori simply shook her head.

"…Loan's not disabled, Lincoln. I never wanted that label hanging over her head," She explained. "Dr. Patel will have paperwork to fill out, but legally speaking Loan is a fully capable adult. I mean, she  _is_ a fully capable adult, but… you know what I mean." Lori sighed, rubbing the side of her brow. "She has her own bank account and everything, and she's more responsible with it than you'd think."

"O-oh… well, alright. Good to know." Lincoln was pleasantly surprised by this, given Lori's somewhat overbearing nature. Then again, he assumed that she of all people would have a good handle on Loan's capabilities.

"Like I said, she mostly takes care of herself. She just… needs someone." Said Lori. "I know you'll-" Just as she placed a hand on her brother's shoulder, he let out a sharp cry and jumped back. Lori remained frozen in place, her hand hovering in mid-air. Lincoln was staring at her with wide, frightened eyes; his breaths were coming out in short, rapid bursts.

Lincoln had  _flinched._

"…Lincoln." Lori gasped. Her brother swallowed, regaining his composure somewhat. His fear was quickly overtaken by a deep sense of shame. He didn't know what had come over him… he was a grown man, for crying out loud. He knew he was safe. He knew Lori wasn't going to hurt him. And yet, as soon as she touched his shoulder that dream came back in vivid detail… all he could see was her lusty face hovering above him.

"…L-Lori…" Lincoln stammered. "I-" Lori raised her hand to hush him.

"It's fine." His sister's voice came out barely higher than a whisper; she sniffed and bit her lip before turning away from him. "I'll, um… I'll talk to you later, Lincoln." It was clear from her tone that she was forcing back tears, and Lincoln could feel the guilt pooling in his stomach. Even now, he hated to see Lori cry… let alone  _make_ her cry. But he couldn't bring himself to console her.

"…Yeah. See you, Lori." Without another word, he walked around his car and got into the driver's seat. "You ready, Loan?" He asked, not waiting for a response before clumsily fastening his own seatbelt. As he adjusted the rearview mirror, he caught a glimpse of Lori standing with her face buried in her palm. Her shoulders were noticeably trembling with sobs.

"Dad…? Are you okay?"

Lincoln snapped out of his daze. His daughter was looking at him with a concerned expression; he took a deep breath to steady his nerves and then forced a smile for her. "Yeah, I'm good. Here," He said, handing his phone to the girl. "Pick some tunes for the ride home."

 

* * *

 

Bobby set down his Gunpla. He wasn't sure how long he'd been at this, but he needed a break. He squeezed his tired eyes shut and massaged them for a few moments, then blinked a few times to clear his vision.

He'd made a lot of progress, that's for sure. For most kids his age building a Gunpla would be far too tedious of a task… but if anything, Bobby enjoyed the tedium. Besides, it helped take his mind off the situation at hand.

Things had been quiet in the room beside his for nearly half an hour now. He supposed that meant that Loan had finished unpacking, at least for the time being. It was still quite jarring to the young boy. This time yesterday, he had been an only child… as far as he knew, anyway. But now his long-lost sister was living right next to him. He never thought something like that could happen so suddenly, at least not in real life.  _It's kind of like Luke and Leia,_ he thought, before deciding that no… it really wasn't.

Bobby drummed his fingers against his desk. He still had a lot of unanswered questions, and his mother had been no more forthcoming than his father had. Maybe he could just try asking Loan again?

Bobby frowned, glancing at the unfinished Gunpla. Chances were he wasn't going to be finishing it today. With a small sigh he slid off his chair and headed for the door. He figured he may as well  _try_ speaking to his sister again… he'd have to get used to it if he was going to be living with her.

Loan's bedroom door was wide open, and it became immediately clear that not only had she not finished unpacking, but she'd barely even  _started._ More than half of the boxes hadn't even been opened yet, and  _none_ of the others were empty. At first he thought that she may have gone downstairs, but then he spotted her on the bed, sprawled out across her stomach. She'd fallen asleep.

Bobby considered waking her… it would be time for dinner in about an hour or so, after all. But just from looking at her eyes it was clear that the girl didn't get enough sleep, and Bobby wasn't about to interfere with that.

Still, he found himself lingering a moment. Now that she was asleep, he could study the strange girl a bit more closely. There was no doubt in his mind that the woman from the previous night was her mother… they looked far too similar for that not to be the case. She didn't look much like their father at all, save for the nearly-unnoticeable freckles dotting her cheeks.

Bobby recalled how nervous and frightened Loan had seemed the previous night. Their father had said she'd been through a lot, and Bobby couldn't help but wonder just  _what_ could have reduced an adult to such a pitiful state. She looked… small. Fragile. More so than Bobby himself, in a lot of ways.

But more than anything, right now she looked  _cold._

 

* * *

 

Lincoln hissed in frustration as another line completely missed the mark. He hit CTRL+Z to undo, then tried again.

Still slightly off.

Lincoln had to stop himself from slamming the stylus through the screen. He took a deep breath through his nose and set the stylus down on his desk. He was letting himself get too worked up again… he needed to take a moment to calm his nerves.

He leant back in his chair and ran his hand through his snowy hair. He tried to shut his eyes for a moment, but he could only see Lori's face when he did.  _Damn it, Lincoln, FOCUS._ He couldn't let himself get distracted… not now.

Working freelance had its benefits. For one, he got to work from the comfort of his own home. Since Ronnie's job as a chef kept her out for much of the day and often well into the night, this left him responsible for most of the chores during the week. It also meant he could be there for Bobby without leaving the boy in the hands of some nanny.

Another benefit was the flexible schedule. He had a deadline and a weekly quota… that was it. For the most part, he was damn good at managing his time. He'd only missed his deadline once, and that was due to Bobby's birth and the complications surrounding it… thankfully, his employer had been understanding of the situation.

On the other hand however, this also meant that Lincoln couldn't afford to slip up. There was no shortage of starving artists out there looking for their big chance… ironically, in the art-dependent world of the comics industry artists were seen as a fairly disposable resource. Either you do well and you  _keep_  doing well, or you're replaced. Lincoln had built up a quiet but positive reputation during his ten years in the field, and it would only take a few bad moves to throw all of that right down the drain.

Lincoln loved his job… he'd  _have_ to love it to do it in the first place. But it could be stressful. Particularly situations like these, where things were already coming down to the wire  _before_ he started getting bombarded with shit. The fact that he was even  _trying_ to work right now felt absurd to the man… he should be with his daughter right now, for God's sake.

Still, he had to try and keep on schedule. Ronnie's job paid fairly well, but it took effort on both their parts to support the family, especially now that Loan was in the picture. Then again… Lori  _had_ said she would send money for Loan… and she  _did_ mention that Loan had her own bank account. He supposed he'd have to ask her about the specifics at some point.

Lincoln pulled himself back upright. He shook his head and slapped his cheeks to focus himself. He took his stylus in hand and got back to work.

…Or, he  _would_ have, anyway. Just as he pressed his stylus to the screen, his phone vibrated with a text from Ronnie; dinner was ready. Lincoln sighed and set down his stylus. Maybe this was a good thing. A good meal might calm down his nerves some.

Lincoln stood up and stretched, grunting in satisfaction as his spine popped loudly. He'd need to ask Ronnie for a massage sometime this week… long work crunches wreaked havoc on his back.

He opened the door and winced slightly as his eyes adjusted to the bright hallway. His studio was dimly lit by comparison, as he figured it best to keep his focus on his monitor. He made his way down to Bobby's room and knocked on the door.

"Bobby!" Lincoln called to his son. "Dinner!"

"Okay." Bobby replied in his usual quiet tone. A moment later the door opened and Bobby stepped out.

"How's the model coming?"

"Good…" Bobby muttered. "Don't think I'm gonna finish it tonight, though." He gave a small shrug. "At least now I've got something to do tomorrow."

His father chuckled under his breath. "…We really need to get you a Clyde, Bobby."

"…Huh?" Bobby asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Ah, nothing. Go on, now. I'll get Loan." Lincoln patted his son on the head. Bobby gave a small smile and headed downstairs. Lincoln walked to the end of the hall and peered into his daughter's room. He quickly spotted her lying across the bed, still completely out cold. He felt bad about waking her, but the girl needed to eat.

"Loan," He said, gently rapping his knuckles against the open door. "Loan, time to wake up." His daughter groaned and shifted slightly. "Loaaaan~" He knocked again.

"Whyyyy." Loan mumbled.

"It's time for dinner."

"Time for…?" Loan's eyes slowly blinked open; she squinted, glancing briefly around the room in confusion before remembering where she was. "O-oh… hey, dad." She mumbled sheepishly, her cheeks heating up slightly. "I fell asleep, huh…"

"It's alright." Lincoln assured her. "Dinner's ready, so whenever you're ready…"

"R-right… thank you. I'll be right down." Her father smirked and headed off, and Loan let out a sigh. These little catnaps were just going to make it harder for her to fall asleep later.

As she pushed herself up, she felt something slide off of her and fall onto the bed. "…Huh?" Someone had draped a blanket over her; it was a deep blue color and covered with bright stars and planets.

 

* * *

 

"Oh, there you are." Ronnie teased as Loan entered the dining room. "Sleep well?"

"Sorry…" Loan apologized, giving a nervous laugh. "It's… comfortable up there."

"Don't worry about it." The older woman said. "Sit, Lincoln's getting everyone's plates right now." Loan nodded and sat down near Bobby as her stepmother returned to the kitchen.

"Hey… Bobby." Loan said quietly. "Thank you."

"…Huh?" The young boy glanced up at her.

"For the blanket. That was you, right?" Loan grinned warmly at her brother. "Thank you. That was really sweet."

"…Oh. Yeah. Y-you're welcome…" Bobby mumbled, staring back down at the tablecloth. "You… looked cold." Loan giggled, making him blush a light pink. He didn't see what the big deal was. She was cold, he gave her a blanket. That's just common courtesy, isn't it?

The rest of the meal went by much the same as the previous two. His parents and Loan made small talk amongst themselves, and he mostly tuned it out and focused on finishing his dinner as quickly as possible. He didn't want to be rude… but he also didn't want to be here for any longer than he had to.

"I'm done." Bobby said as he finished. "Can I go back upstairs?"

"Sure, Bobby." His father said. His mother simply rolled her eyes; she knew Bobby was shy, but she really wished her husband would be a  _bit_ stricter with the boy.

"See you, Bobby." Loan smiled and gave her little brother a wave.

"Y-yeah… you, um… you too." Bobby mumbled as he skulked out of the room. He wished he could be as friendly towards her as she was towards him. He wished he could  _fake_ it, at least.

As Bobby stepped into his bedroom, he noticed that the blanket had been folded up nicely and set on his bed.  _That was nice of her,_  he thought. But then he noticed that there was something sitting on  _top_  of the blanket. He walked over to take a closer look.

It was a small vinyl figurine of Spock in a simplified, cartoony style. Bobby picked it up and looked it over; it stood about two inches tall, and he could only assume it was one of those blind-boxed figurines meant to sucker in collectors. Personally, Bobby was not a fan… he preferred to buy something and actually know what he was getting. In any case, what was it doing  _here?_

…Was Loan  _giving_ this to him?

It was the only explanation that made sense. This must have been her way of thanking him, but that was silly… all he'd done was lend her a blanket. That was nothing worth a  _reward_. He was tempted to go put it back in her room, but refusing a gift was considered rude, wasn't it? He'd already been rude enough as is. With a shrug, Bobby walked over to his bookcase. He stood up on his toes and set the vinyl down on the top shelf, right between a Dalek and an Ewok.

A small smirk crossed the boy's face. He didn't like vinyl figurines very much… but for some reason, he liked this one a lot.


	4. The life of Bobby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this certainly took a lot longer than expected. Sorry, guys... I've been focusing more on my art as well, which eats up a lot of my time. I'll try harder to balance the two in the future.
> 
> Anyway, not much to say this time around. As of late I've been writing a lot of greentext stories for 4chan. These are shorter, self-contained stories, but still within my usual style. Content is widely varied, both SFW and NSFW. If you're interested, you can check them out at my [pastebin.](url)

Lincoln's head started to teeter slightly, his eyelids growing heavy. He hadn't had a good night's sleep since Friday, only taking short naps when he needed to. This wasn't simply due to his work, however… the man's dreams were plagued with visions of his sister straddling him,  _claiming_ him… and, most upsettingly, he himself giving into his pleasure. Lincoln slapped himself back awake and forced himself to sit up straight. He needed to focus. He took a deep breath, then exhaled and got back to work.

He'd spent nearly all of Sunday with his nose to the grindstone, working hard to get back on schedule. Today would be no different. Lincoln was no stranger to this sort of struggle, but then again he'd never been in a situation quite like this before. He was tempted to simply bite the bullet and ask for an extension, but he knew he could meet his deadline as long as he stayed focused.

Probably.

Just as he pressed his stylus to the monitor, the loud  _RING_ of his phone startled him and made him put a thick line all the way through the page. He groaned and hit UNDO before checking the caller ID. His heart instantly sank into his stomach: it was Lola. Any time she or her twin sister called, Lincoln knew he was in for a bad time… as much as he would have liked to ignore it, he knew she would just keep calling until he answered. With a small sigh of resignation, he picked up the phone.

"Hel-"

' _LINCOLN!'_ A shrill voice screeched directly into his ear, making him wince.  _'You will not BELIEVE what that fucking WHORE Lana did this time!'_

"…What'd she do this time, Lola?" Lincoln asked, despite already knowing fully well what the answer would be.

' _That traitorous CUNT has been screwing my boyfriend behind my back for WEEKS!'_

… _Yep,_ Lincoln thought.  _As expected._ "…I'm sorry to hear that, Lola." He grumbled, trying his best to keep working while his sister ranted.

' _That fucking… GREASEBALL! Josh was MY man, and she just-'_

"…Wait. Wasn't Josh  _Lana's_ boyfriend? The one  _you_ slept with?" Lincoln asked. His little sister scoffed in response.

' _Ugh, come ON, not you too.'_  Lola groaned.  _'That was like a YEAR ago, Linky. Water under the bridge.'_

"Ah. Right. My apologies." Lincoln muttered with a roll of his eyes. "Look, Lola, I'm kind of busy, so-"

' _I have had it up to HERE with her, Lincoln!'_ At this point Lincoln noticed his phone had begun to vibrate.  _'You need to tell-'_

"Uh, hang on a second. I'm getting another call." Lincoln said, doing his best to suppress his joy at the distraction.

' _Don't you DARE-'_

Lola's voice was mercifully cut short as her brother switched lines. "He-"

' _LINCOLN!'_

"…Hello, Lana." Lincoln groaned. He should have known it wouldn't be so easy.

' _Don't listen to that skank! Josh was MINE!'_ The auto mechanic cried. _'She's the one that's been fucking him behind MY back!'_

"Mmm. Tragic." Lincoln grunted. Some things never changed. The twins lived together, sharing a revolving door of boyfriends; these relationships would invariably end the same way each time. Of course, this meant that the two were nearly always at each other's throats, and they  _still_ expected Lincoln to solve their disputes for them. Not that he  _could…_ both were far too stubborn to listen to reason.

' _She never changes, Lincoln! She still thinks she can just… TAKE whatever she wants! Well, I've had it! You tell her that I want her OUT!'_

"Why don't you just tell her yourself?" Lincoln asked, clicking his tongue in frustration as he attempted to get Ace Savvy's bicep  _just_ right.

' _I am NOT talking to her ever again!'_ Lana said.  _'And this time I mean it! She's DEAD to me!'_

"Alright, alright… I'll pass it along. Hang on." Lincoln said half-heartedly.

' _And tell her I said she's a bitch!'_ Lana added before her brother switched lines.

"Okay, sorry about-"

' _What the FUCK, Lincoln?!'_ Lola shouted.

"Sorry, Lola." Lincoln sighed. "Listen, I was just talking to Lana, and-"

' _Oh, PLEASE. You can't trust a single thing that comes out of her lying mouth!'_ His bratty sister snapped.

"R-right… anyway, she says that Josh was  _her_  boyfriend, and-"

' _I told you, that was AGES ago!'_ Lola scoffed.  _'That idiot just doesn't know how to let things go!'_

"Yeah, well, she doesn't seem to think so." Lincoln explained as he set down his stylus, giving up on multitasking for the time being. "And she wants you to move out."

' _W-wha… ME?!'_ Lola sputtered.  _'Why that little…! If anyone should move out it's HER! You tell her that I want HER out-'_

"Look, Lola-"

' _DON'T CUT ME OFF!'_ His little sister shrieked, cutting him off. Lincoln massaged his temples in exasperation.  _'You tell that grease monkey that if she's not out by the end of the week, I'll throw her out myself!'_

"…Alright, whatever." Lincoln grumbled. "Hang on."

' _And tell her I hate her guts!'_ Lola shouted before Lincoln switched lines again.

"Hey, Lana." Lincoln said. "Just talked to Lola."

' _Did you call her a bitch?'_

"…Sure." The artist lied, making little attempt to hide the frustration in his voice. "Look, Lola's saying she wants  _you_  to move out."

' _WHAT?!'_ Lana snapped.

"Look, I'm just the messenger." Lincoln muttered.

' _Oh, that TEARS it… she thinks she can boss me around?!'_ Lincoln heard his sister angrily stomp her way across the floor and throw open a door.  _'You listen HERE, you prissy little-'_

' _No, YOU listen!'_ Lola cried.  _'I'm sick and tired of your bullshit! You come home smelling like a trash heap, you leave fucking oil stains all over everything, you steal MY boyfri-'_

' _Josh was MINE, you liar!'_ Lana snapped.

' _Was NOT!'_

' _Was TOO!'_

' _Only because you stole him away from ME!'_ Lola screamed.

' _Well, maybe if you were willing to take it in the ass every now and then you'd be able to hold onto a man!'_ Lana shot back.

' _Ugh… as IF!'_ Said Lola, her disgust evident in her voice.  _'I'm not some filthy slut like YOU, Lana! I have standards!'_

' _Oh, really? YOU'RE not a slut?"_ Lana replied sarcastically.  _'JOSH certainly thinks so.'_

' _Y-you… you fucking… that is IT! I want you out of my house! I want you out of my LIFE!'_

' _YOUR house?!'_ The mechanic shouted.  _'MY name is on the lease!'_

' _So is MINE!'_ Lola countered.

' _Yeah? When's the last time you paid rent?!'_

' _I-I'm between jobs, Lana!'_ Lola stammered.

' _Sure, BETWEEN jobs. Right.'_ Lana sneered.  _'I'm sure there are PLENTY of modeling agencies looking to hire a washed up, bloated SKANK.'_

' _I am NOT-'_

' _Why don't you just give up and sell your body?'_ Lana said with a note of smugness to her voice.  _'Might as well upgrade from slut to whore, right?'_

' _YOU BIT-'_

Lincoln sighed and hung up. There was no use listening in any further; besides, he'd heard  _far_ too much information as is. He knew fully well that this wouldn't amount to anything… neither of the girls would move out. They would fume for a few days, make up, and the cycle would ultimately repeat itself. The cuck twins were eternal.

He shook his head to refocus himself. "Alright… back to work." Lincoln muttered, picking up his stylus. But once again, the moment the nib touched the screen his phone rang once more. Lincoln growled in frustration, slamming the stylus down on the desk and snatching up his phone. "Look, can you  _please_ work this shit out for yourselves?!" He shouted into the receiver. "I'm too fucking busy for this!"

' _...Er… I'm sorry, but I'm trying to reach a Mr. Lincoln Loud?'_  An unfamiliar female voice said. Lincoln felt his face heat up; he slumped back in his chair, letting out a low groan.

"…Speaking." The ashamed man mumbled. "S-sorry about that… I thought you were someone else."

' _Quite all right.'_ The woman said in a calm, composed tone.  _'My name is Dr. Amita Patel.'_

"Oh!" Lincoln straightened up. "You're Loan's psychiatrist, right?"

' _That's correct. I've just spoken with her mother… I understand that Loan will be in your care for the foreseeable future?'_

"Yeah… that's right." Said Lincoln. "Lori said you'd want to meet me in person."

' _Yes… Loan included, of course.'_ Dr. Patel said.  _'Your sister is covering the fee, so you don't need to worry about that.'_

"O-oh… okay. Great." Lincoln made a mental note to thank Lori later. "Um… when do you have an availability?"

' _Well, you're in luck… my eleven-o-clock tomorrow has cancelled, so I could fit you in then. If that works for you, of course.'_

Lincoln opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. He was going to decline due to his work, but he couldn't… it was bad enough that he was too busy to spend time with his daughter, and he wasn't about to put  _this_ off too. Besides, the sooner he dealt with it the better. "…Yeah. Yeah, that's fine." He said reluctantly. He'd  _really_ need to buckle down and work his ass off this week.

' _Excellent. I will see you tomorrow, then.'_ Dr. Patel replied.  _'I look forward to meeting you, Mr. Loud.'_

"Yeah… likewise. See you then." Lincoln ended the call and set his phone back down on his desk. "…Shit." He said under his breath. He glanced over at his monitor and sighed, getting to his feet; he figured he should let Loan know about the appointment. Besides, he  _really_ needed some coffee.

 

* * *

 

"Darn it…" Loan grumbled as her worst party member died for the third time, making the team fail their hunt. She didn't understand how the guy got all the way to Shagaru Magala while being so inept… no doubt he had simply relied on better players to carry him through the game. Still, at least they'd managed to hack off and carve the monster's tail for parts; she needed them for her armor set.

Loan jumped as she heard a gentle knock on her door. "Y-yes…?"

"Hey Loan, it's me." Came the voice of her father from the other side. "Can I come in?" Loan breathed a small sigh of relief. Then again, it's not like it could have been anyone else… Bobby and his mother were at school and work, respectively.

_**Not that Bobby would waste his time on you anyway.** _

"Y-yes… come in." She said, setting aside her 5DS.

Lincoln let himself in, a warm smile on his face as per usual. "Hey, how's it-" Lincoln's eyes widened slightly as he laid eyes on the state of things: Loan was lying on her unmade bed in 1-Up mushroom shirt and gray pajama bottoms, several open bags of chips next to her and her sheets covered with crumbs and cheese dust. She'd only unpacked halfway, and one of the smaller boxes was being used as a makeshift trash can and already overflowing with empty packages of snacks. "…Wow. Lori wasn't kidding, huh…" Lincoln muttered.

"S-sorry!" Loan stammered, bolting upright. "I… got a little too comfortable…" She scratched the side of her cheek, giving a nervous laugh.

"It's fine," Lincoln assured her. "We'll uh… we'll figure things out. Maybe no Doritos on the bed, okay?" His daughter gave a sheepish nod.

"…Sorry, uncle Lincoln." She muttered, before realizing what she said. "I-I mean, dad! Sorry…"

"Don't worry. You'll get used to it." Lincoln chuckled and leant against the doorframe. "Anyway, I just got off the phone with Dr. Patel." Loan noticeably perked up at this. "I set up an appointment for tomorrow."

Loan frowned slightly. "Tomorrow…?"

"Something wrong?"

"N-no… that's fine." Loan said with a shake of her head. The truth of the matter is, she never liked actually  _going_  to Dr. Patel's office. Aside from the fact that going out  _anywhere_ was difficult for her, the fact that it was a psychiatrist's office meant that the other patients in the waiting room tended to be...  _unique._ Quite frankly, it made Loan feel uncomfortable.

_**Who the fuck are you to talk?** _

"Um… what time…?" She asked.

"Eleven." Lincoln replied. Loan winced; that meant she'd have to get up at a reasonable hour.

"…Alright." Loan forced a smirk. "Thanks, dad." Lincoln returned her smile with one of his own.

"So… how's everything going?" He asked. "You settling in alright?" Loan nodded.

"Y-yes… I am." She said. "Um… how's work…?" Her father's cheerful expression faltered slightly.

"It's… going…" He muttered, scratching the back of his head. He walked to his daughter's bed and sat down at the end. "I'm sorry, Loan." Loan frowned and scooted up beside him.

"Sorry for what?"

"I should be spending time with you, you know…? Getting to know you. But instead I'm just working." Lincoln said quietly. "Maybe I  _should_ ask for an extension…"

"No! It's… it's okay!" Loan assured him, frantically waving her hands. "I-I couldn't ask you to put your life on hold just because of me! I've been enough of a bother as is…"

"Loan, you're not a bother. You're my  _daughter._  We have twenty-one years to catch up on, and it's just…" Lincoln sighed. "I shouldn't be working right now. It's not fair to you." Loan's brow furrowed; she looked away, chewing her lip for a moment.

"You've… done so much for me already.  _Too_ much. I… I can't even begin to express how much I appreciate that." Loan looked at her father, a small smile crossing her face. "Do what you need to do. I can wait a bit longer."

Lincoln remained silent a moment and took a deep breath through his nose. "I promise, as soon as I'm done with this assignment I'll make time for you. All the time you want." Loan nodded, beaming at her father.

"I look forward to it."

Lincoln chuckled and lightly ruffled the girl's hair before getting to his feet. "I'd better get back to work. Let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay. A-and, um…" Loan averted her eyes, twiddling her thumbs sheepishly. "I'd like… I'd like to learn how to do some stuff. Around the house, I mean. T-to help. You've been nice enough to let me live here, so… I figure I should return the favor."

"That won't be a problem." Lincoln said with a grin. "But… you shouldn't feel like you owe us anything, Loan. Like I said, you're my daughter… the only one I've got. There's no way in hell I wouldn't take you in." Loan frowned slightly.

"I, um… I don't think most people would." Loan said quietly. "I'm not… normal." Lincoln could hear the pain in his daughter's voice; it was like a spear piercing directly through his heart.

"You know…" Lincoln muttered. "If there's one thing I've learned over the years, it's that 'normal' is just a word."

 

* * *

 

"Hey, Bobby… yo, Earth to Bobby."

"…Huh?" Bobby snapped out of his daze and looked up at the rotund boy seated across from him. "Oh… y-yeah…?"

"You okay?" The boy asked. "You've barely eaten your lunch." Bobby glanced down at the half-eaten chicken sandwich sitting before him. His father had made it… and while he may not be quite on the same level as his mother, he was no slouch when it came to cooking. Still, delicious as it was, Bobby didn't have much of an appetite at the moment.

"Uh… not really hungry." Bobby muttered. "…You want it?" He added, taking note of how the other boy's gaze kept flicking towards the sandwich.

"Don't mind if I do!" The boy said without hesitation, immediately reaching across the table and taking it. Bobby couldn't help but grimace as he ate nearly half of the thing in a single bite. Charlie had already finished his own lunch, of course… he was a fast eater. "So," He mumbled through a mouthful of food before swallowing. "Something wrong? You're even quieter than usual today."

"…Home stuff." Bobby said quietly. Charlie was perhaps the closest thing he had to a friend, though he wouldn't quite consider him to be such. They'd never hung out outside of school, and in fact rarely saw each other outside of lunch; the boy was two grades above him, after all. Bobby, being unusually well-read and verbose for a child his age, found it hard to connect with the other kids in his class. Not that he had much in common with Charlie aside from their shared interest in video games, but he was grateful to at least have someone to sit with at lunch.

"Like… good home stuff, or bad home stuff?"

"…I don't know yet. Just… home stuff." Bobby muttered. Charlie raised an eyebrow, then shrugged. He was used to Bobby's withdrawn nature by now.

"Well… anything else new?" Charlie asked in a vain attempt to start a conversation. "Read the new Ace Savvy?"

"…No." Bobby sighed. "I don't like comics."

"Oh… right." Charlie grumbled. He found it unusual that the son of a comic artist didn't like comics, but he never bothered to question it… there was a  _lot_ about Bobby that could be considered unusual. Still, he liked the boy well enough.

Then, Bobby was suddenly jostled by someone's elbow striking the back of his shoulder as they walked past. "Whoops, sorry 'bout that,  _Dobby._ " A callous voice taunted from behind him. "Guess I should watch where I'm going." Bobby turned and glared at the offender: a far larger boy than him, with light brown hair and a perpetually smug sneer glued to his face. A lanky boy stood nearby, guffawing into his palm.

"…It's Bobby." Bobby muttered, only to shrink back as his bully leant forward, his eyes narrowing into tiny slits.

"What was that?" He asked in a low, threatening voice. Bobby swallowed and focused his gaze at the floor.

"N-nothing, Hayden..."

"Yeah, that's what I thought." Hayden chuckled and roughly tousled the smaller boy's hair before standing upright. "You always were a smart lil' guy." He walked off with his goon in tow, and Bobby let out a sigh as he turned back towards the table. He was met by the unimpressed face of Charlie.

"…What." He muttered. Charlie frowned and shook his head in exasperation.

"You gotta stop letting them walk all over you, Bobby." The overweight boy groaned. Bobby huffed and averted his gaze.

"…It's fine." Bobby grumbled under his breath. "If I ignore them, they'll get bored of it." Charlie just sighed and leant forward, resting his chubby face on his palm.

"Take it from me, that's a load of bull. All it does is make them try harder." Charlie said. "You gotta assert yourself. Fight back! I used to get picked on too, and now look at me… nobody messes with big Chuck." He puffed out his chest proudly, but Bobby just stared him with a raised eyebrow.

"You're twice as big as everyone in your grade. I'm not." Bobby pointed out. "He'd kill me."

"Well… maybe, but at least you'd go down fighting." Charlie said with a shrug. Bobby just rolled his eyes. He knew Charlie meant well, but he was far too much of a wimp to do anything about the situation. All he could do was grin and bear it.

…Or  _sulk_ and bear it, at least.

The bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. As the other students began cleaning up, Charlie quickly scarfed down the rest of Bobby's sandwich before getting to his feet. "Anyway… whatever this 'home stuff' is, I hope you figure it out soon."

"…Yeah. Thanks, Charlie." Bobby mumbled before heading off to join his class. "See you."

As usual, Bobby made a point of standing at the back of the line as the students were led back to class, his gaze focused on the ground and his hands jammed deep into his hoodie pockets. He preferred to be out of sight when he could… he always felt like everyone's eyes were on him when his back was turned. He knew they weren't, but it  _felt_ like they were.

Unfortunately, he wasn't paying enough attention to where he was going, and bumped into the boy in front of him when the group came to a stop. He turned and glared at Bobby in annoyance, making him shrink back. "S-s-sorry…" He whispered sheepishly. The other boy just rolled his eyes dismissively, giving a small shake of his head before heading into the classroom.

"Robert, no dawdling." Mrs. Heathers scolded him. "And stand up straight, for goodness' sake." Bobby muttered a barely-audible apology before shuffling into the room.

As much as he'd like to sit in the back row, he really had no choice in the matter… as luck would have it, his assigned seat was smack dab in the middle of the class. He hated it, but Mrs. Heathers had refused to let him switch. As the class continued with their reading of Shel Silverstein's 'Where the Sidewalk Ends', Bobby idly doodled spirals and shapes in his notebook. He didn't need to read it. He already  _had;_ he'd read all of Silverstein's works back to front. He knew the words, he knew the deeper meanings, and he could recite his favorites by memory. His teacher would often scold him for 'reading ahead', but how could that possibly be a bad thing? He wasn't fast… everyone else was  _slow._

Like right now, for example. A boy in the front row was attempting to read aloud, and failing in spectacular fashion. "Th-there is a place where the sid… the sid…" The boy stammered. Bobby cringed; for crying out loud, it was the  _title of the book._ "The… sidee-waulk…"

" _Sidewalk._ " Bobby hissed, far louder than he had meant to. He didn't even need to look up: immediately, he could feel the entire class staring at him. Mrs. Heathers cleared her throat.

"Well then," She said in a stern tone. "If you're so eager to  _correct_  your fellow students, Mr. Loud, perhaps you'd like to read instead?" Bobby's head snapped up, his eyes wide with horror.

"N-n-no, I-"

"Robert.  _Read._ " Mrs. Heathers ordered. Beads of sweat began to form on the boy's forehead, and he took a quick glance around; everyone in front of him had turned in their seats, staring at him with amused smirks. Bobby swallowed and slowly raised the book before his face. He heard a light scoff from his teacher as he had to turn to the correct page.

"U-u-um…" Bobby stuttered, the book trembling in his hands. "Th-th-there i-is a place…" He took a deep breath, trying his best to steady his nerves. "A-a-a place wh-where the side… the side…" Bobby tried his best to push on, but his voice petered off into a pathetic wheeze. He couldn't do it. Mrs. Heathers  _knew_ he couldn't do it, but she'd made him try anyway. He could already hear the rest of the students snickering. "Th-the sidewalk… e-e-e…"

"…Daniel." Mrs. Heathers said with a sigh. "Please read." Bobby hung his head, his face flush with embarrassment as his peers did their best to stifle laughs at his expense. He let out a low groan, flipping his hood over his head as Daniel, once again, struggled to pronounce 'sidewalk'.

 

* * *

 

Loan did her best to scrape the crumbs on her bedsheets into one of the empty chip bags. Granted, this resulted in about half of them ending up on the floor, but that was probably better than on the  _bed,_ right?

_**Sure, keep telling yourself that.** _

Loan balled up the bag and chucked it into her makeshift trash can, only for it to bounce off the overstuffed box and land on the floor. Loan frowned. She really should just throw everything into one of the larger boxes.

…She  _should,_ but instead she simply laid back down. Surely, she'd earned herself a break. She'd cleared off her bed, after all… that was something, right?

_**Jesus fucking CHRIST, Loan.** _

Loan picked up her 5DS and got back to Monster Hunter. She'd been playing this game for over a year, and still never got tired of it. She'd just do a few hunts, and then get back to work.  _Just_ one or two.

…Or three.

Might as well do a fourth, right?

Alright… just one more. She needed the claw, after all… surely it would drop next time.

Darn it. Okay,  _one_ more.

There it is. Now- wait. She forgot she needed the  _tail_ too. With a sigh, she started the hunt again.

Bad teammate. Hunt failed. Loan grumbled under her breath and started again.

Failed  _again._ Alright, enough co-op. She'd go solo… her Palicoes were tough, they could handle it.

…Hunt failed.

Loan gripped the handheld tightly, taking a deep breath to stop from screaming in frustration. She was getting too worked up. She needed a break from this, something to help her calm down a bit.

…Pokémon should do the trick.

 

* * *

 

Bobby slowed to a stop and hopped off his bike, walking it the rest of the way up the driveway. He wasn't really one for exercise, but he did enjoy riding his bike… not that he really  _did_ outside of traveling to and from school. The wind through his hair was relaxing after a rough day at school, and for Bobby,  _every_ day of school was rough.

Bobby typed in the code on the garage keypad, and the door began to rise up, only to get stuck partway. Bobby narrowed his eyes and beat his fist against it, but it did nothing. "Oh, come on…" He grumbled. With a sigh of resignation, he leant his bike against the wall and crouched under the open door.

He gripped the inner frame and tried to lift the door the rest of the way, but it wouldn't budge. He took a deep breath and tried again, straining with all his might against the door, but again, it was fruitless. "Alright… c'mon, Bobby. You're not a  _complete_ wimp…" He told himself. "Here we go." He tried one more time.

…And then the door started to move.

"Oh, no." Bobby gasped, kicking his legs as he found himself being lifted off the ground. "Nonononono-" The boy lost his grip and fell onto his back, letting out a wheeze as the air was knocked from his lungs. He coughed and gasped for air, only to cough harder as he breathed in the dust he had kicked up. Once the coughing had subsided, he simply stared up at the ceiling in silence. Of  _course_ this would happen. He was Bobby Loud, after all, and his fate was the same as all men in the family: fail your way through life and hope things turn out okay in the end. It may have worked out for his father, but Bobby couldn't help but doubt that he would have such a bright future. If nothing else, he at least took solace in the fact that the day couldn't possibly get  _worse._

No sooner had that thought left his mind than he heard his bicycle topple over.

Bobby squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath through his nose before exhaling. This was fine. Everything was fine. This was just life as usual for the boy. With a small grunt, he got to his feet. Sure enough, the bell had snapped right off the bike's handlebar. Bobby grumbled under his breath and picked it up, looking it over. He could fix it. Well… probably.  _Hopefully._ At least it was just-

 _No,_ Bobby told himself.  _Not again. Just go inside._  Bobby picked up his bike and wheeled it into the garage, flipping down the kickstand and setting it off to the side. It then occurred to him that he should have just used the kickstand in the first place. With a small groan, Bobby headed for the door leading into the laundry room, pressing the button to lower the garage door.

It got stuck midway.

Bobby glanced over his shoulder at the garage door with a flat expression. Then, he turned away and stepped into the house.

 

* * *

 

Loan sighed and set down her 5DS. She'd put it off long enough; the fifteen caffeine-free Diet Cokes she'd drank throughout the day were starting to weigh heavily on her bladder. She sat up and gave a little stretch before getting out of bed. That was enough of a break anyway. Loan glanced over at the clock.

It was nearly five PM.

Loan's face fell. Had she really gotten  _that_ distracted? She had barely done  _anything_ today.

_**Of course you haven't. When's the last time you accomplished anything? You're worthless.** _

Loan frowned deeply and shook her head. That was it… no more games for today. She needed to get unpacked. She needed to at least  _try_ to do  _something_ for once.

But for now, the pressure in her abdomen reminded her of why she had gotten up in the first place. Loan shuffled out of her bedroom just as Bobby climbed the last few steps up to the second floor. Her face lit up immediately upon seeing him.

"Oh, Bobby!" Loan greeted her little brother warmly. "W-welcome back." Bobby took a quick glance up at her before staring back down at the floor.

"…Hello." The boy mumbled. Loan's cheerful expression faltered as she took notice of his demeanor. At the surface, he seemed barely different than usual: slouched posture, hands hidden in pockets, head hung low. But there was something a bit different this time. His voice sounded slightly unsteady, and Loan could swear that she saw a hint of wetness in the corner of his eye.

"Bobby… is something wrong…?" Loan asked in a gentle voice. Her brother frowned, his brow furrowing slightly.

"…Bad day." Bobby admitted.

"Oh…" Loan bit her lip and fidgeted slightly. He was clearly upset, and quite frankly she wasn't sure what to do… she still hadn't been able to connect with the boy, and save for their limited interaction on Saturday she'd barely spoken to him at all. She leant forward and tilted her head a bit, trying to meet his gaze, but Bobby simply withdrew further. "Do you, um… do you want to talk about it…? I-I may not be much help, but-"

"No." Bobby muttered. "…Don't worry about it. It's fine." Without another word, Bobby hurried past his sister and headed for his room.

"W-well, if you change your mind… I'd be happy to hear you out, at least. Sometimes… sometimes that helps." She said just as he grasped the doorknob. Bobby flinched slightly.

"…I told you. Don't worry about it." Bobby repeated. "I'll be fine." He turned to look at her, his blue eyes meeting hers for just a moment. She really did look concerned… he knew she meant well, but he didn't want to talk. Not to her, nor to anyone else.

Still… he did appreciate it.

"Thanks, though..." He said as he opened his door. "…For asking, I mean." Then, he stepped inside and shut the door behind him. Thankfully, homework was easy tonight: a writing prompt to explain what you thought was at the end of the sidewalk, and draw a picture illustrating it. It would be a simple task for him, one he could easily finish before dinner. He fished out his handout sheet and tossed his backpack aside, then sat down at his desk.

_**Name: Robert Loud** _

_**What I think is at the end of the sidewalk is…** _

_Nothing, because there is no sidewalk. To follow the 'sidewalk' is to leave behind the sadness of adulthood and walk the path of a child instead. The children know 'the place where the sidewalk ends', which is a place of wonder and joy, which is not a place but a state of mind. There is no 'path' to actually follow, only a way to think, and so there is no sidewalk._

There. Done. There was no need to draw a picture of  _nothing,_ after all.

 

* * *

 

The rest of the night had been normal enough, save for Ronnie's absence at dinner; her job left her working late most nights, unsurprising given she worked at a popular upper-class restaurant downtown. The only reason she got any time to herself at all was because she had turned down the chance to be promoted to sous chef. As good as an opportunity as it had been, she had to put her family first.

It was nearly midnight by the time she arrived home, and she'd been surprised to see that her husband was already getting ready for bed. Seeing as how he'd have to get up early for the long drive to the city, he couldn't afford to work too late. Ronnie wasn't complaining; he'd been sleeping in his studio for the past two nights, and quite frankly she missed having him by her side.

"Are you sure you'll be able to meet your deadline, though?" She asked as she slipped into her nightgown.

"…I'll make it work." Lincoln promised. He was already lying in bed, his arms folded behind his head. He couldn't help but ogle his wife as the sheer fabric of the gown hugged her frame, in particular the way it accentuated her perfect rear end; if he didn't know better, he'd say that she was teasing him on purpose. He had no idea how he was supposed to last a whole week without sex.

"Naughty boy." Ronnie chided her husband, and he noticed she was looking at him out of the corner of her eye. "Don't think I don't see you staring..." Lincoln coughed and quickly turned away, his cheeks reddening slightly.

"Can you blame me?" He muttered sheepishly. "It's like dangling a piece of meat in front of a starving lion." Ronnie chuckled under her breath. That had been the idea, of course… the truth of the matter was, as much as she would  _like_ to hold true to her word, she really needed to blow off some steam after such a long day.

Plus… she'd been itching to jump her husband's bones too.

"I'll tell you what…" She began in a husky tone, approaching the bed with a noticeable sway of her hips. "How about we forget about that punishment of yours for tonight?"

"Couldn't stay away, could you?" Lincoln said with a chuckle. Ronnie pouted.

"You wanna test me?"

"…I'll be good." Lincoln said quietly. Ronnie smirked and climbed onto the bed, crawling on her hands and knees to position herself above her husband. She leant down and gave him a passionate kiss.

"Maybe I  _want_ you to be bad." She whispered, sending a shiver down Lincoln's spine. She straddled her husband's waist, already feeling the fruits of her labor rubbing against her. "Someone's certainly eager…" Ronnie cooed.

"With a babe like you, it's hard not to be." Lincoln replied with a cocky smirk. "I really am a lucky g-aaaaah…" He gasped as Ronnie began to grind herself against him.

"You bet your ass you are, Lame-O." Ronnie only used Lincoln's old nickname when she was  _really_  set on maintaining control… not that Lincoln minded. Being a fairly passive fellow, he was more than happy to let his wife take charge in bed. He put his hands on Ronnie's hips and began to thrust himself up to meet her; she shuddered in pleasure and increased her pace. Even through the fabric of his pajama bottoms it felt incredibly good. "That's right…" She hissed. "You like that, don't you…?"

" _You love it, don't you…"_

"I…"

" _You LOVE it…!"_

"W-wait, no…"

" _Fuck me, little brother… FUCK me."_

Lincoln's eyes shot wide open. He let out a strangled cry and bolted upright, shoving Ronnie off of him. She yelped as she fell back against the mattress, then sat up and glared at her husband.

"Lincoln, what the  _hell-_ " Ronnie's anger faded in an instant as she saw the fear in Lincoln's eyes; he had backed up against the headboard and his chest was heaving with deep breaths. For a few moments, neither said anything. Nothing  _needed_ to be said… it was immediately clear to Ronnie what had happened. "…Lincoln…" She muttered under her breath. The shaken man's breaths began to steady, and his fear slowly gave way to shame.

"R-Ronnie." Lincoln gasped. "I-I'm sorry, I-"

"No. I-it's okay… you don't have anything to apologize for." Ronnie assured him, her voice low and gentle. She slowly scooted over to her husband and embraced him. He tensed up slightly before relaxing into her arms. " _I'm_ sorry. I-I didn't think… oh God, Lincoln, I should have  _known._ "

Lincoln frowned. How  _could_ she have known? He was a grown man. He shouldn't be feeling this way… he shouldn't be trembling in his wife's arms like a frightened child. He was pathetic.

"It's okay, honey." Ronnie cooed, gently stroking his hair. "It's all going to be okay."

"…Yeah." Lincoln said, half-heartedly returning the hug. "Yeah, I know."

 

* * *

 

The ride to the city was mostly silent, save for the familiar tones of SMOOCH from the radio; Lincoln had offered to let his daughter pick the music again, but she had insisted he choose this time.

Loan frowned as she looked over at her father. He seemed morose and had deep creases under his eyes. It was clear he hadn't slept well. Lincoln took his thermos from the cup holder and took several big gulps of coffee. Loan estimated there must be at least three mugs worth in there, maybe even four. She was pretty sure that much caffeine wasn't good for him, but quite frankly he looked like he needed it.

"Um, dad… are you okay…?" Loan asked. Lincoln glanced at his daughter and forced a small smile.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just, uh… couldn't get much sleep last night." He said, before turning his attention back to the road. Loan frowned and gave a small nod. She wasn't really convinced... he didn't just look tired, he looked  _troubled._ "By the way," Lincoln began. "When we get there… remember I'm just your  _uncle,_ okay?"

"R-right… of course." Loan muttered. She'd just started getting used to calling him dad, too… but it made sense that they'd need to keep that a secret. She let out a soft sigh, looking out the window. "…I wish it didn't have to be that way, though." Lincoln frowned and nodded.

"Me too…" Lincoln agreed. "I, um… I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I-it's better this way, I guess. I'll just… have to be  _really_ careful not to slip up." Loan said with a nervous laugh. Lincoln let out a small chuckle.

"We both do," He said to his daughter.

 

* * *

 

As the bell rang, mercifully signaling it was time for recess, Bobby got to his feet. Granted, it wasn't like he actually  _did_ much during recess, but he was grateful for any chance to get out of the classroom for a bit. Besides, he could just find a quiet spot to sit and read for a bit. As usual, Bobby hung back for a moment so the other students could file out first.

"Robert, can you come see me for a moment?" Mrs. Heathers asked just as he was about to leave; he forced himself not to groan as he approached his teacher's desk.

"Y-yes, Mrs. Heathers…?" He asked quietly. The woman sighed and handed him his writing prompt from the previous night.

"Robert… do you care to explain this?" She asked. Bobby glanced at the sheet, finding to his confusion that it was marked with a big red  _D._ His brow furrowed as he scanned it in detail, looking for anything he may have missed.

"I… I don't understand." He muttered. "I-I  _did_  what you asked."

"No, you did not." Mrs. Heathers said with a shake of her head. "Well-written as it is, I asked you to explain what you thought was at the end of the sidewalk. 'Nothing' is not an answer." Bobby stared at her as though she had grown an extra head; he looked from her, down to the paper, then back at her again.

"B-but there _is_  nothing _._ There's no sidewalk. Th-there can't  _be_ anything there…"

"The point of this assignment, Robert, is to exercise your creativity… not to interpret things as you see fit. Thus far you are the only student that has failed to understand that." Mrs. Heathers opened a folder on her desk and took out a blank worksheet, handing it to the boy. "I'm willing to give you one more chance. Do try to follow instructions this time."

"B-b-but there's nothing to be  _creative_ about! It's been  _written!_ It means what it means!" Bobby stammered. "There's  _no sidewalk,_ and there's no  _end!_ There's  _nothing there!_ "

"Then think of something that  _might_  be." His teacher replied coolly. Bobby grit his teeth in frustration.

"There. Is. No.  _Sidewalk._ " Bobby hissed.

" _Robert._ " Mrs. Heathers said in a stern tone. "Either you do the assignment as intended or you fail. Do you understand?"

"Do  _you_ understand what a  _metaphor_ is?!" Bobby shot back before he could stop himself. He regretted it immediately; Mrs. Heathers pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes at him. "I-I'm, sorry…"

"I'm sure." His teacher replied curtly. "For that little outburst you will be spending recess and lunch at your desk. You will complete that assignment properly, and on the back you will write no less than five paragraphs on why you should not talk back to your teacher. If you  _fail_ to complete this within the allotted time, I  _will_ be sending you to Principal Jacobs' office. Do you understand  _that,_ Mr. Loud?" Bobby swallowed and hung his head, giving a small nod.

"…Yes, Mrs. Heathers."

 

* * *

 

Loan bounced her leg anxiously as she sat in the waiting room. Even with her father at her side, she didn't like being here, or in any sort of waiting room for that matter. Knowing fully well that the gentle, muted colors of the office were intentionally chosen to put clients at ease simply made her uncomfortable… as though she were some sort of mental case.

_**You are.** _

"Loan? You okay?" Lincoln asked, taking note of his daughter's nervous behavior. She gave a small nod.

"Y-yeah… I'm fine." Loan said, forcing a reassuring smile. "Um… thank you again for doing this. I-I know you're really busy…"

"Hey… you've got nothing to thank me for. I'm here for you." Lincoln replied with a smirk. He placed his hand over Loan's and gave it a gentle squeeze; she couldn't help but smile herself.

A nearby door opened and a frazzled middle-aged woman stepped out. Behind her was a tall Indian woman with black hair tied back into a neat bun. She carried a mature, elegant air about her, and wore business casual attire that was undoubtedly also chosen to put her clients at ease.

"Alright, Victoria… Bryce will set you up with your next appointment." She said to the woman. "You hang in there, and feel free to call me if anything changes."

"T-thank you, doctor." The troubled woman stammered before walking over to the counter. Dr. Patel adjusted her horn-rimmed glasses before turning towards the two with a smile.

"Hello, Loan. It's good to see you again." She said. Loan got to her feet, followed by her father.

"Hi, Dr. Patel." Loan greeted her, noticeably more chipper than she had been before. "U-um, this is my… uncle."

"Lincoln Loud. Nice to meet you." Lincoln said, shaking hands with the woman.

"The pleasure's all mine. My apologies for the wait… you can come on back now."

Dr. Patel led them down a short hallway to her office. It was nicely decorated and the walls were adorned with her various credentials, as well as several awards for her work. Clearly, she had a good reputation among her peers. Unsurprising, given Lori's wealth… she would surely settle for nothing but the best for her daughter.

"Please, sit." She said, gesturing towards two chairs sitting before her desk. She walked around and sat in her own chair. "Firstly, Loan I must ask… do I have your consent to speak freely with your uncle regarding your treatment?"

"U-um…" Loan stammered. She glanced over at her father, who offered her a supportive smile.

"You don't need to say yes if you don't want to, Loan." He assured her. "Whatever you're comfortable with."

Loan returned his smile and nodded. "It's okay. I… I don't want to keep any secrets from him." She said to her psychiatrist. Dr. Patel smirked and opened a drawer.

"Very good. Please fill this out, then." She set a form down in front of them, and they took a few minutes to complete it before handing it back to her. "Thank you," She said as she took the form and set it aside for the time being. "Now, then… I must say I'm quite surprised, Loan. Your mother tells me that your new arrangement was your own decision… quite frankly, I'm pleased that you took such initiative of your own volition."

"O-oh, um… thank you." Loan muttered. "I… didn't want to go to Japan, so…"

"Understandable" Dr. Patel said with a nod. "I had warned Lori that forcing such a change upon you may be counterproductive to your mental health. Although… I suppose this is a big change for you as well."

"It… it is." Loan admitted. "But da-" She caught herself as her father gave her a discrete nudge with his foot. "Aaaah…  _uncle_  Lincoln is… he's really good to me…" Loan stammered, forcing a nervous smile. "I-I like it there." Dr. Patel raised her eyebrows, observing Loan for a moment before speaking again.

"…I see. That's good to hear." She said, her tone remaining impassive. She turned her focus to Lincoln. "Now, Mr. Loud… or do you prefer I use your first name?"

"Yeah, Lincoln's… Lincoln's fine."

"Well, Lincoln, it's admirable you would take on such a responsibility." Dr. Patel began. "If I may ask… what prompted you to do so?"

"Well… she's family. That's, uh… really important to me." Lincoln chuckled. "Besides, she's, well… she's great." Loan blushed a light pink and turned away, covering her face with her hands.

"C-come on, dad…" Loan muttered under her breath, only to clasp her hand over her mouth as she realized what she said.

_**Good fucking going, Loan. It's been, what, five minutes?** _

Lincoln clenched his teeth and clutched the armrest tightly as he did his best to maintain composure; perhaps she hadn't heard?

"…Dad?" Dr. Patel inquired.  _Dammit._

"N-n-no, I, uh… I didn't…"

"We-we're so close that she calls me dad sometimes!" Lincoln cut in. "Kind of, like… a pet name, you know…?" He gave an awkward laugh and an unconvincing grin.

"Y-yeah! That! A-and he thinks of me like his dau-"

" _Loaaaaan._ " Lincoln hissed through his teeth.

"-Aaaarling niece. L-like… the best." Loan said with a nearly identical smile to her father's.

_**Amazing. Bravo. You're really nailing this one.** _

Dr. Patel stared at the two with an inquisitive gaze in silence; she seemed to be  _studying_ them. Then, a warm smile spread across the doctor's face. "Well, it seems like you two get along wonderfully. I'm glad you've finally been able to forge such a strong bond with someone besides your mother… and I can see you're happy with your current arrangement." Loan had to suppress a sigh of relief.

"Y-yes, I am." Loan said. "He's, uh… he's a very good man."

"It would seem so." Dr. Patel smirked at Lincoln, who couldn't help but chuckle sheepishly at the compliment. "Now, then… I'd like to speak with your uncle alone, if that's alright with you."

Loan's face fell. "O-oh… um…" She glanced nervously at the door.

"If you prefer, you may wait in the hallway instead." Dr. Patel offered. This made the nervous girl perk up a bit."

"Th-thank you…" She said, getting to her feet. "I guess I'll see you in a bit, uncle Lincoln…" In the back of her mind, Loan realized that she had  _meant_  to say 'dad' again; for the first time, she was happy she had slipped up.

"Yeah." Lincoln said with a gentle grin. Loan left, and Dr. Patel waited a few more moments before speaking again.

"So, Lincoln… if I may ask, what is your home life like? As far as family, that is."

"Well… I'm married," Lincoln explained, "And we have a son, Bobby. He's seven, but he's a smart lil' guy."

"I see. How would you say  _they_ feel about all this? I imagine this is a big change for them." She asked.

"Well… Ronnie wasn't too keen on it at first. We, uh… we had a bad fight." Lincoln sighed. "But she came around. I think she's still a bit unsure about it, but they get along pretty well, I think. As for Bobby, he's… shy.  _Very_ shy," He emphasized. "He's kind of been keeping to himself so far."

"I see…" Dr. Patel muttered. "

"Er… I know they'll get used to her, though. She's… a really good girl." Lincoln assured her, and she gave a small nod.

"She is." Dr. Patel agreed. "Though I must ask… why  _you?_ The last I had heard, you and your sister were estranged." Lincoln's breath hitched in his throat, and his brow furrowed slightly; it hadn't occurred to him that, over the years, Loan had no doubt been asked about her family at some point.

"W-well…" He stammered. "We… earlier this year, we reconnected…"

"Hm… is that so." She said, folding her fingers on her desk. "Forgive me for being so bold, but… is she really nothing more than a niece to you? Lincoln swallowed the lump in his throat.

"What… what do you mean by that, Doctor…?"

Dr. Patel pursed her lips, thinking over how to approach the matter, before deciding that that being direct was the best option. "…Lincoln, if I may be blunt for a moment… I don't think Loan is your niece. She's your daughter, isn't she?" Lincoln's blood ran cold. He shook his head, trying and unfortunately failing to maintain his composure.

"N-no… don't be ridiculous." He lied. "She's just-"

"Mr. Loud," The doctor cut in, "There is more to psychiatry than merely talking to a client. Often, one's words do not tell the whole story, so I have become highly observant of people's demeanor… though I imagine that  _anyone_  would be able to tell something's amiss."

"Th-that's not…" Lincoln trailed off, hanging his head slightly. Dr. Patel frowned.

"…You do not need to say anything if you don't wish to." She said in a gentle tone. "But I assure you… anything you tell me does not leave this room." Lincoln's face scrunched up in conflict. As much as he wanted to keep up the charade, he knew she had him.

"…Yeah." He said quietly. "Yeah… she is." The doctor simply nodded sagely. "I, uh… I didn't know. Not until Friday night."

"…I see…" Dr. Patel said. "And, given the unusually small age gap between you and your daughter, would it be fair to assume that the circumstances of her conception were… less than consensual?"

"Oh, God…" Lincoln groaned, burying his face in the palm of his hand.

"Again, you don't need to-"

"No… no, it's fine." Lincoln sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees; for a few moments he said nothing as he gathered his thoughts. "The night before Lori left for college, she came home drunk and… well, you get the idea." Dr. Patel frowned, giving a small nod. "She doesn't even remember actually  _doing_  it. Hell,  _I_ didn't remember it until she told me."

"And do you remember it now…?" Dr. Patel asked. Lincoln's brow furrowed deeply.

"…Every last second."

"It's not uncommon for those who have experienced a traumatic event to block out those memories. Sometimes, our subconscious simply chooses to deny the truth rather than cope with it." Dr. Patel said. "I'm sorry. It must have come as a shock to you."

"Yeah, that's an understatement." Lincoln said with a self-depreciating chuckle. "Dunno which was the bigger surprise… that my sister raped me or that Loan was my daughter. One hell of an evening, though." Dr. Patel couldn't help but give a small smirk herself; at least he still had a sense of humor.

"And, knowing Loan's parentage, you accepted her into your home nonetheless." She stated. "Did you feel…  _obligated_ to?"

"…No. It doesn't matter if Lori's my sister. Loan's my  _daughter_. I couldn't let her go, not when… not when she'd just entered my life." Lincoln said. "It may sound weird, but even though I barely know her… I love her. She's… she's my kid. You know…?"

"Of course. It's not unusual at all… you loved your son from the moment he was born, I assume?"

"More than I'd ever loved anything before." Lincoln admitted. "I guess… it's kind of like that with Loan, huh?"

"There are far too many fathers that would rather have nothing to do with their child. You are clearly not one of them. You said family is important to you, correct?"

"Yeah. I'm from a really big family, so… well, I'm sure you know already."

"Indeed." The doctor said with a smirk. "Your sister speaks of them often. And yet… whenever it came to  _you,_ she would always try to dance around the subject. Now I see why." Lincoln frowned. "How did Loan take the revelation?"

"Not… great. She had a panic attack. A  _bad_ one." Lincoln said. "Now she barely talks to her mom. I think what Lori did hit too close to home for her, you know…?"

"…Understandable." Dr. Patel began jotting something down in her notebook. "And how do  _you_ feel, Lincoln?"

"I, um… I don't hate Lori. I love her, even now. I know I shouldn't but I just… I  _can't_  hate her. Even with what she did, I don't think she's a bad person." Lincoln muttered. "Besides, she was… she was drunk. She… didn't know what she was doing…" He looked away and chewed his lip nervously.

"Do you… blame yourself for what happened?" Dr. Patel gently asked. Lincoln scrunched up his brow.

"There was… a point where I could have stopped it. Where I could have  _ran._ But… I didn't. I just… let it happen…" Lincoln said quietly. "Hell, I could have screamed at any point, but I didn't. And she just… I…  _Goddamn it..._ " Lincoln hung his head and rubbed at his eyes.

"Here… you don't have to continue if you don't want to." Dr. Patel assured him as she passed over a box of tissues. He gratefully accepted one and wiped his eyes.

"I just wanted it to  _stop,_ but then I-I… started to  _like_  it." He admitted. "I've been having these… these  _nightmares_ where I  _want_ it. A-and I feel like I… maybe  _I_ did something to make it happen, you know? Like, maybe I was just…"

"Asking for it?" Dr. Patel finished for him. He gave a small nod.

"…Yeah."

Dr. Patel took a deep breath through her nose and sat up straight. "Lincoln, let me ask you something. When, this happened, did you feel scared?"

"Well… yes." Lincoln muttered.

"Even when you started to 'like' it… were you still scared?" She asked. Lincoln opened his mouth, then closed it again; he paused a moment to think about it.

"I… I guess I was." He said.

"I see." Dr. Patel wrote down something in her notebook again. "If I may be so bold, are you and your wife sexually active?"

"Ah…" Lincoln coughed and averted his eyes, his cheeks turning a light pink. "W-well… of course we are."

"And do you  _enjoy_ sex?"

"D-do you really need to ask…?" Lincoln muttered. Dr. Patel gave a brief smirk.

"Sex is an inherently pleasurable act. For you to  _feel_ pleasure from it is nothing you should blame yourself for… especially at the cusp of puberty." The doctor replied. "It is not uncommon for victims of sexual assault to blame themselves for what happened, especially when the aggressor is someone close to them. But it is  _not_  your fault, Lincoln. You wanted her to stop, yes?"

"Well, yeah…"

"You  _told_ her to stop?"

"…I did." Lincoln said.

"Then there you go. There is nobody to blame here but Lori herself. Alcohol or not, she made her choices. She forced herself upon you… someone who implicitly  _trusted_ her. It may have felt good. You may even have  _enjoyed_  it, at some level. But that does not mean you  _wanted_  it." Dr. Patel explained. "There is a big difference between arousal and consent." Lincoln had to admit… she was right. He  _hadn't_  wanted it. There was no point where he had been  _okay_ with what was happening.

And more than anything… he'd only been a  _child._

"That's, um…" Lincoln let out a short, relieved laugh. "You're… you're right. I guess I've been kind of stupid, huh…"

"Not at all," The doctor explained. "Again, this was a highly traumatic event for you… it's of little surprise that your mind would struggle to make sense of it all. As I'm sure your daughter would attest to, these scars do not fade so easily." Lincoln exhaled and gave a small nod.

"I… I guess."

"I'll tell you what, Lincoln." Dr. Patel withdrew a card from her breast pocket and offered it to him. "The choice is yours, but I would be more than happy to provide counseling should you feel you need it. I'll even waive the fee for your first session." Lincoln cocked an eyebrow.

"You mean this  _wasn't_  a session…?" He asked as he took the card.

"Merely an interview." Dr. Patel said with a chuckle. "Though I suppose there is little difference between the two."

Lincoln smirked and glanced down at the card. "…Thanks. I'll keep it in mind," He said.

"Good. Well, Mr. Loud, it was a pleasure to meet you." The doctor said, getting to her feet; Lincoln did the same. "I have no doubt that Loan is in good hands."

"It was nice to meet you too, doctor." Lincoln said sincerely as he shook the woman's hand. "And… thank you. Really. You, ah… you've set me at ease a bit."

"Glad to hear it." Dr. Patel said with a warm smile.

Lincoln left the office to find Loan standing anxiously a few feet away. "O-oh… um, you're finished…?" She asked.

"That we are. Your uncle is a good man, Loan." Dr. Patel said. "I'm sure you'll be very happy with him." Loan's face lit up and she eagerly nodded.

"Y-yes… I think so too."

 

* * *

 

Soon enough, their business was finished… once Loan had gotten her prescriptions from the front counter, the two were on their way.

"Dr. Patel's really nice." Lincoln said as they walked back to his car. "She seems to care about you a lot."

"Yeah… she's great. She, uh… she's helped me a lot…" Loan trailed off as they approached the car. Then, she stopped, letting out a soft sigh. "U-um… dad…?"

"Yeah…?" Lincoln turned, frowning as he noticed his daughter's nervous expression. "Is… something wrong?" Loan chewed her lip apprehensively, then let out a small whimper.

"I'm… I'm sorry…!" Loan cried. "I-I-I kept slipping up, and I… I messed up!"

"W-whoa, hey…!" Lincoln lightly grasped the girl's shoulder. "It's okay… it's fine. It all worked out okay."

"S-still… I messed up." Loan mumbled. "I need to be more careful… I-I'll try harder next time, I promise…" Lincoln offered her a reassuring smile and gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze.

"It's okay, Loan. Honestly… I think it worked out for the best. So if anything, I should  _thank_ you." He said. "She, ah… helped me with some stuff…"

"I know. I-I was… I listened a bit…" Loan muttered. "P-please don't be mad…"

"…Oh…" Lincoln frowned slightly.

"I-I'm sorry." Loan hung her head in shame. Quite frankly, Lincoln couldn't be mad at her even if he wanted to.

"It's alright. I'm not mad… honestly, I can't really blame you." Lincoln said with a small chuckle. "Um… how much did you hear…?"

"…A lot." Loan admitted. She looked up into her father's eyes with a sad, sympathetic gaze. "I'm… I'm sorry. I didn't even realize you were hurting…"

Lincoln sighed. "I… never told you I was," He said. Loan chewed her lip and glanced away briefly before looking back at Lincoln.

"L-listen… it does get easier. I… promise it does. It never goes away… not entirely. But it gets easier." She assured her father, a shaky smile spreading across her face. "I may n-not know much, but… I've… been there before. So… maybe I can help you, you know…?" Lincoln's eyes widened slightly before his face settled into a warm smile. He wrapped his daughter in a hug, and she tensed up briefly before relaxing into Lincoln's arms.

"You're already helping me, Loan." He said quietly. "More than you know. I love you." There they were… the words that had been on the tip of his tongue since he'd learned that this nervous girl was his daughter. "Loan sniffled, burying her face into her father's shirt.

"I… I love you too." She mumbled through his shirt. Loan basked in her father's embrace for a moment; despite her aversion to physical contact, she did love hugs when they came from the right people. In the past, that had only been her mother… but her father's were even better. She couldn't help but feel warm and secure in his arms.

_**God, you're such a fucking baby.** _

All too soon, their hug broke. Lincoln pulled his phone out of his pocket and checked the time. "Bobby gets home at about five… so we still have an hour or so before we need to head back." He said. "What do you say we grab some lunch? I know a place… shouldn't be too crowded, either." He knew he  _should_  go home and get back to work as soon as possible, but…

…Fuck it.

"I'd… I'd like that." Loan said with a smile.

 

* * *

 

"Yo, Bobby! Didn't see you at lunch!" Charlie greeted the younger boy as he packed his things away in his locker.

"…Got in trouble." Bobby grunted. "Sorry."

"Dang, dude, what'd you do?" Charlie asked. "Finally get in a fight?" Bobby rolled his eyes.

"Homework stuff…" He grumbled, zipping up his backpack and shutting his locker. He locked it, then gave the lock a few hard tugs to ensure it was secure; prior experiences had taught him to be extra careful, lest he find something disgusting in there the following morning.

"Sheesh… you forget to do it or something?"

"…Don't worry about it." Bobby said quietly. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah… seeya, man." Charlie waved goodbye as Bobby walked off. As usual, he had hung back a bit to let most of the other students file out. He made his way out of the school and walked to the bike racks.

The ride home only took about eight minutes or so… the short distance was the only reason he was allowed to bike home on his own. Still, he often took his time, sometimes even taking alternate routes just to prolong the ride. But not today. Today, he just wanted to get home and relax.

Soon enough he arrived, hopping off his bike and walking it up the driveway. Thankfully, the garage didn't get stuck this time… until he tried to  _close_ it, but he was willing to settle for 50% success. For him, that was pretty good.

He skulked his way inside, through the laundry room and into the living room to find his father coming down the stairs, empty coffee mug in hand. Lincoln's face lit up upon seeing his son.

"Hey, Bobby. Welcome back," He said as he ruffled his son's hair, much to the boy's embarrassment. "How was school?"

"…Same as usual." Bobby muttered. "How's, um… work?" Lincoln gave a nervous laugh, scratching the back of his head.

"It's… going. By the way, I was thinking maybe we could just order in tonight… pizza sound good?" Lincoln asked. Bobby smirked slightly; he did love pizza.

"Yeah… that'd be good."

"Great. I'll order a little later." Lincoln said. Bobby nodded and hurried upstairs. He had homework, but he'd worry about that later… he wanted to unwind a bit first.

As his hand rested on his doorknob, he glanced over at Loan's open door. He frowned slightly and let go of the knob; she'd been nothing but friendly towards him so far. He should say hello, at least. He shuffled over to the door and peeked in; she was lying in her bed, scribbling away in her sketchbook. Bobby was a bit curious as to what she was drawing, but figured it was none of his business.

"…Hi, Loan." He said quietly. The young woman let out a small yelp and jumped, hugging the sketchbook tightly against her chest with a red face.

"Y-yes?! Is something-" Loan trailed off as she laid eyes on her little brother. She relaxed slightly, a bright smile crossing her face. "O-oh… hello, Bobby. Um… did you need something…?"

"…No." Bobby mumbled. "Just… just saying hi." He mumbled before skulking towards his room. Loan blinked; that was a first. Up to now, he'd only spoken to her when she spoke to him first. A happy smile spread off her face again.

_**He's just being nice.** _

_Oh, shut up,_ Loan thought. Now that she had looked up from her sketchbook, she laid eyes once again on her room. She'd let herself get distracted again. She was still far from finished unpacking, though she'd made some progress since the previous afternoon. She glanced down at her half-finished drawing and frowned slightly. It could wait. With a small sigh, she shut the book and got out of bed.

Unpacking her figures would take a long time, so she'd save that one for later. Instead, she grabbed one of the boxes of clothes. Lincoln had taken the time to neatly fold them, the first time anyone had bothered to do so in years; usually, she just left everything in a big pile, fishing out clothes as she needed them. She was grateful that her father would go through so much effort for her, and vowed to do her best to keep things neat.

_**I give you a week before this place looks like a bomb went off.** _

Loan rolled her eyes and ignored her intrusive thoughts as she began laying her clothes in the dresser drawers. She tried her best to keep things organized, with her shirts, sweaters, and pants all set in their own drawers, and her undergarments and socks sharing one drawer. As she looked over her work, she realized something was missing: her blue and brown sweater. Her  _favorite_  sweater. She nearly panicked for a moment before remembering that she had left her clothes from the first night draped over the mirror. She groaned, burying her face in her palm. She really was a mess.

Still… she had no hamper of her own yet. She'd have to use Bobby's again. She took the clothes and headed to Bobby's room to find that the door had been left slightly ajar. She peeked inside, seeing her brother seated cross-legged on the floor in front of his TV, game controller in hand. She opened the door a bit more and stepped inside, leaning against the door frame; she usually wouldn't come in without knocking like this, but she couldn't help but be a bit curious.

The boy was playing Mario Kart…  _badly._ Despite only being on 100cc, he was all the way in 9th place. In the  _Mushroom Cup,_ no less. He was making wide turns, consistently hitting barriers or even falling of the stage. He grumbled under his breath as he fell behind into 10th place. Quite frankly, it was a rather sad display.

"Y-you need to drift."

Bobby jumped, quickly pausing the game and turning towards the sudden intrusion. His brow furrowed as he laid eyes on his sister. "…What…?"

"You need to drift," Loan repeated as she stepped inside, tossing her clothes into the hamper. "Th-that's why you're not making the turns… you need to drift. Y'know… like Initial D. 'D-déjà vu, I've just been in this place before'…" She briefly 'sang', or rather, awkwardly talk-sang. Bobby made a baffled expression, clearly not getting the reference.

"I, um…" Bobby stammered, glancing back at the TV. "…I don't know how to do that."

"I-I could… show you, if you'd like." She offered in a quiet voice. Bobby looked towards her again with a slightly apprehensive look on his face, but she simply smiled at him sweetly.

"U-um… okay." He mumbled. Loan grinned and sat down on the floor beside him. He handed her the controller.

"Thank you. Now…" Loan un-paused the game and picked up where he left off. She found it slightly ironic that such a meek boy would be playing as Bowser, but she wasn't complaining… he was one of her go-to characters, alongside Waluigi and Shy Guy. "Watch," She said as she hit the next corner. "You hold down R and you just… slide." Bobby's eyes widened slightly as she effortlessly performed a drift around the corner, overtaking Diddy and reclaiming 9th place. He'd seen the CPU do that before, but he'd figured the game was just cheating. Loan paused the game and handed off the controller to her brother. "Here, you try." She said with a smile.

"R-right… okay. Sounds easy enough…" He mumbled. As he hit the next corner, he did as instructed… only to once again crash into a barrier and fall behind. He shot his sister an annoyed glance.

"O-oh, um… you need to kind of… wiggle the control stick back and forth a bit to get the right angle." She added. Bobby nodded and tried again; sure enough, he made the next turn no problem. "There, see?" Loan beamed at the boy. "And, next time try holding down the drift longer, until you see sparks… that'll give you a boost."

"…Okay." He said. Next turn he tried again… holding the drift for as long as he could manage. To Loan's pleasure, he managed to hold the drift until orange sparks appeared, giving him a boost. A tiny smile crossed the boy's face and he paused the game again. "I-I did it."

"See? It's easy." Loan giggled. "I-if you get used to that, you'll have no problem." Bobby pursed his lips slightly. Loan frowned as he exited the cup. "W-why did you-"

"I already lost two races… I won't be able to win." Bobby muttered. "Hang on…" He got to his feet and walked to the TV, grabbing another controller. "It's… easier if there's two players." He said, offering his sister the controller. "I-if you want to, I mean…" He muttered as he averted his eyes, his cheeks heating up slightly. Loan blinked, and then a wide smile spread across her face.

"…I'd love to."

 

* * *

 

 


	5. Not crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sheesh. Alright, here it is. Really sorry for the wait, honestly I have no excuse for it; I'm just way too easily distracted by my art and greentext stories. Going forward, I think I'm going to try going for slightly shorter chapters released more frequently. Note that by 'shorter' I mean short by my usual standards. 
> 
> You may also notice that I'm breaking the pattern with this as opposed to 'More Than A Sister'. In all honesty, I'm still having a lot of trouble with it and I'm still not sure what the heck to do with the climax. So I decided to push on with this for now and delay the next chapter of MTAS until I've got more of a handle on it. Please bear with me.

"…You're pretty good." Bobby said quietly as Loan easily caught up to him from 9th place.

"Well, I… have a lot of time to practice." Loan admitted. Bobby simply nodded; even he could tell that Loan didn't really do much besides sit around and do what she wanted all day. He had to admit, he was a bit jealous.

"I don't…" He grumbled. "I'm really bad at games, but I like them." They were on the Flower cup now, and even with Loan's tips he had yet to manage higher than 3rd place… even in the Mushroom Cup.

"You're not so bad… and you're already doing a lot better." Loan said.

"…Thanks."

"So… you really read all those books, huh…?" Loan asked, taking a brief glance towards her brother's bookshelf. Bobby nodded, not taking his eyes off the game for a second. "And physical copies, too…"

"…I like to read," Bobby muttered. "Grandma Rita got me a tablet once, but it wasn't the same. I… like holding a book. Is that weird…?"

"N-no… not at all. It's… cool, honestly." Loan said with a smile. "Not too many- oops, look ou-" Loan flinched as her green shell bounced off a barrier and hit Bobby's kart, sending him back to 5th place. "S-sorry…" She said, laughing nervously as Bobby gave her an irritated glance. They'd had an agreement to not go after one another… after all, only one of them needed to win the cup for it to count.

"…It's fine." Bobby sighed. "Just a mistake." He drove through an item box, snagging a blue shell for his trouble… only to use it just as Loan slipped into first place. Loan gaped open-mouthed as the explosion flung her off the track.

"Hey!"

"Sorry…" Bobby said with a sly smirk. "…Finger slipped." Loan gave an exaggerated pout before giggling into her palm.

"I-I guess I deserved it. I'll be more careful." She promised.

"Anyway…" Bobby mumbled. "You're the only person that thinks it's cool. E-everyone else just thinks I'm… y'know. Weird." Loan frowned, glancing over at him.

"Why would they think that…?" She asked softly.

"Nobody else my age reads," He explained. "At least… not like I do. Some of them can barely read at all, even the easy stuff. I don't get it. I could read before I could talk… why can't they read  _now?_ " Bobby let out a small sigh. "…But, no.  _I'm_ the weird one."

"O-oh…" Loan muttered, taking a moment to get back to 2nd place. "Well I mean… you  _do_ read pretty advanced books, you know…? Like, stuff for grown-ups."

"…I read whatever I can read," Said Bobby. "Words are words, and I can read them, and I know what they mean. But nobody else does, and they can't understand what  _I_ mean either." His brow furrowed. "…So I just don't talk to them. I-I don't know how to, anyway. When I try, I just… can't."

"Don't you have any friends?" Loan asked.

"…No."

"None…? Like, not even one?"

"…No." Bobby repeated. "There's a few people I can talk to, but that's it.."

"W-well, if it makes you feel any better… I've never really had any friends either." Loan admitted. "There's some people I talk to online, but that's a bit… easier for me."

"Are you shy too…?" Her little brother asked.

"Well, yeah… th-there's a bit more to it than that, but yeah, I am." She said.

"…It sucks, doesn't it?" Bobby mumbled.

"Language, Bobby."

The siblings yelped and dropped their controllers in surprise. Bobby quickly scrambled to pause the game before turning to see his father standing in the doorway, watching the two with a bemused smirk on his face.

"O-oh… hey, dad." Loan greeted him with a bashful smile. "Um… how long have you been there?"

"A little bit. Didn't want to interrupt." Lincoln chuckled. "Looked like you two were having fun." Loan beamed and nodded, but Bobby simply blushed and looked away.

"…Loan's teaching me stuff." Bobby muttered. "She's good."

"I bet. Anyway, I was about to order, so… Loan, what do you like on your pizza?"

"Oh, um… cheese is fine." She said.

"Keepin' it simple. And Bobby, the usual? Green peppers and pineapple?" Lincoln asked his son, receiving little more than a small grunt of approval in response. "Alright, sounds good. I'll leave you guys to it, then."

"…Okay. Thanks." Bobby said quietly before turning back to the game. Lincoln grinned, taking one last glance at the two before departing. "A-anyway, let's get back to-" The boy began, before realizing that his sister was staring had him with a grimace of disgust. "…What?"

"Pineapple…?" Loan gasped. "Pineapple on p-pizza? With  _peppers?_ "

"…Yeah?" Bobby cocked an eyebrow. "What about it?"

"That's… that's gross."

"No it's not."

"Y-yes it is!" Loan stammered. "It's… it's  _pizza!_ "

"Yeah, and I like those things on it." Bobby muttered. "Have you ever even tried it?"

"Well, I… n-no, I guess not…" Loan mumbled sheepishly, scratching at her cheek. "B-but I don't even like pineapple or peppers on their own…"

"You're missing out, then." Said Bobby. "…It's good."

"I'll, uh… I'll just take your word for it." Loan sighed, picking up her controller.

The race ended with Loan in 1st place and Bobby in 4th; he didn't particularly mind, as 4th was still good by his standards. There was still one more to go, but quite frankly Bobby doubted they could possibly lose at this point… Loan had come in 1st place in all three races thus far.

"Hey, um, Bobby…" Loan began just as they were about to continue to the next race. "You know, if you'd like… maybe  _I_ could be your friend?" Bobby blinked and looked up at his big sister.

"…You?" He asked. Loan smiled and nodded. "But… you're my sister."

"Why can't I be both?" Loan offered. Bobby averted his eyes and scrunched up his brow in thought.

"I'm… just a kid, though." Bobby said. "Why would you want to be friends with me…?" Loan tilted her head slightly.

"Why wouldn't I? I'm kinda still a kid myself, y'know…" Loan said with a self-depreciating laugh. "Besides… I like you a lot." Her brother turned a light pink and flipped his hood over his head, earning him a giggle from Loan. Bobby peeked at her from the corner of his eye; in truth, he kind of liked her too. He liked  _talking_ to her, at least. She was nice.

"U-um…" The boy stammered. "…Okay." Loan's grin grew wider.

"I guess that's that, then." Loan said cheerfully. "You're my first real friend."

"…Yeah." Bobby said, turning his head slightly to hide his smirk. "…You too." With that, Bobby pressed the button and moved on to the next race.

"O-oh, I almost forgot…" Loan gasped as the map loaded. "During the countdown, start accelerating at '2'. It'll give you a boost at the start." Bobby's eyebrows rose slightly and he gave a small nod. Sure enough, as soon as the race began Bobby and Loan surged ahead of the other racers.

"Thank you," Bobby muttered. "Um… I have other games I could use help in too… after this, I mean." He chewed his lip, fidgeting awkwardly. "I-if you want, anyway…" Loan took a moment to respond as she focused on avoiding a green shell.

"…Which ones?"

 

* * *

 

 Ronnie stared idly out the car window as the darkened streets of Hazeltucky passed by, illuminated only by the streetlamps lining the sidewalk. It was late.  _Again._  Or early, depending on how you looked at it. She sighed, massaging her tired eyes before glancing up again. She hated taking an Uber at this hour… the streets were empty and she never felt quite safe. Granted, she'd never had any problems in the past, and she was sure she could take care of herself if she  _did,_ but still. She wished they could afford a second car; 'someday', Lincoln promised. She knew he meant it, but quite frankly 'someday' couldn't come soon enough.

Ever since she was a child, she had wanted to be a chef. Well, that or a professional skater, but as she mellowed out with age so too did her aspirations. When she first set down this path she had been so confident, so sure she could handle the long hours and demanding customers. But she hadn't accounted for marriage. She hadn't accounted for motherhood. Ronnie loved to cook, but becoming a chef may have been the worst decision of her life.

Of course, that was far from the only thing weighing on her mind. The past five days had been an absolute whirlwind; the mere fact that she was  _working_  at a time like this was borderline absurd. But she had to. Like it or not, she was the primary breadwinner for the family… not that she resented her husband's choice to follow his passion. She would have it no other way. Still, between the stress of her job and the sudden, drastic changes in her life, she felt as though she was near her breaking point. Hell, she'd nearly snapped at the head chef today, an offense that very well could have cost her a job.

Ronnie was grateful for the life she had. She had a wonderful husband, a precious son, a nice house… everything she could have asked for. And yet, her life had been marked by one tragedy after another, both large and small. First, her father leaving her mother… effectively walking out of their lives without hesitation. Then, being taken away from her comfortable life in Royal Woods and thrust into a tiny apartment with ten others for…  _some reason._ The loss of her brother, and of her grandfather not even a year thereafter. Her friends leaving for brighter pastures, one after the other. Her premature labor. The son she'd nearly lost.

The daughter she  _had_ lost.

And now this. That she-devil, the woman that had taken her brother from her… Ronnie never could have imagined that she could hate her more than she already had. But of course, leave it to Lori Loud to force her way into her life again, one last hurrah before fucking off to God knows where. Lori had raped her own brother.  _Her_ husband, the second most important person in her life after the only child they could ever have. She'd birthed his daughter in secret, cut him out of her life entirely, and then upon the revelation of what she'd done, scarred him for life. Perhaps even  _broken_ him, the same way that her actions had broken that poor girl.

Against her wishes, that same girl was now living under her roof… right beside her son. It wasn't that she didn't trust Loan; indeed, she was like a different person when she'd taken her medication. But Ronnie couldn't help but feel trepidation at the situation she'd been thrust into. In a single night, her entire life had changed… not only hers, but Lincoln's and Bobby's as well. She knew there was little option: Loan couldn't be on her own. It was either let her stay with the father she never knew she'd had, or leave her in the hands of that awful woman. Her initial hostility aside, her conscience would only allow for the former.

Whether she liked it or not, Loan was here to stay. She was a good person, innocent of her mother's misdeeds… she deserved to know her father, and Lincoln deserved to know his daughter. The girl had suffered enough. The least Ronnie could do was welcome her with open arms.

Besides… Loan's arrival was far too fortuitous to be mere coincidence. Perhaps it was  _more_ than that.

Soon enough, Ronnie arrived home. The foyer was dark, and the light from the upstairs hallway told her that Lincoln was still awake and hard at work. Ronnie let out a small sigh; she hated that her husband was pushing himself like this. It was far from the first time he'd been put in this position, and she knew fully well that it wouldn't be the last… but she couldn't help but worry for him nonetheless.

Ronnie dragged her exhausted body up the stairs and down the hall to Lincoln's studio. Sure enough, he was so focused on his work that he didn't even hear her enter. For a moment, she simply watched in silence. It had always impressed her… as much as gourmet cooking was a form of art in its own way, this was something far outside her realm of understanding. He always made it look so effortless, though she knew that wasn't the case.

"Lincoln." She said, making her husband let out a small yelp and put a line through the page. He turned and shot her a mildly irritated glance that she could only snicker at. "Hey." Lincoln's annoyance faded into a smirk and he chuckled under his breath.

"…Hey." He said as he got up from his chair. "How was work?" Ronnie frowned slightly.

"It was… you know. It was work." Ronnie sighed. She approached her husband carefully, his frightened reaction from the previous night still fresh in her mind. "How was-" Before she could finish, Lincoln pulled his wife into a deep, passionate kiss. Her eyes went wide in surprise and she froze up for a moment before melting into his embrace; after several seconds their kiss broke, leaving a slightly flustered Ronnie in her husband's arms. "W-wow." She stammered. "You, uh… wow. A-are you… okay, now? About… you know." Lincoln frowned slightly, averting his eyes.

"Dr. Patel… helped me come to term with some things." Lincoln muttered. "I'm still not over it… not completely. But I guess she put it all in perspective. Some of it, at least. I don't know." He sighed and scratched the back of his head. "I'm going to start seeing her, I think. Or… talking to her. You know what I mean." Ronnie smiled and hugged him a bit tighter.

"You'll get there," Ronnie said quietly. "I know you will. You're strong like that."

"Well, I've got a great woman supporting me." Lincoln said with a smirk. Ronnie's cheeks flushed and she broke away from her husband.

"O-okay, okay… sheesh. I'm too tired to go weak in the knees tonight," She muttered. "So… everything good with Loan, then?" Her husband nodded.

"Everything's great. Actually, she and Bobby have been getting along already… can you believe that?" Lincoln said.

"Already…?" Ronnie raised her eyebrows in surprise. That was fast, for Bobby… usually it would take far longer for him to warm up to somebody, be they family or not.

"They were playing games together earlier, and they were just… talking." Lincoln explained. "At dinner, too. I think Bobby likes her."

"No kidding?" Ronnie asked. "Well… that's great, then." She had to admit, she was relieved. One of her biggest concerns had been how Bobby might take all of this. He was a sensitive boy, after all… and this was a massive change to thrust upon him so suddenly. "Have you… talked to him about her 'conditions' yet…?" Lincoln was just about to say 'yes' when it dawned on him that no, he hadn't. He had  _meant_  to, but between work and everything else it had slipped his mind.

"Um… tomorrow." Lincoln said. Ronnie gave him an annoyed look and he put up his hands in submission. "I promise! Tomorrow, okay? Just been… you know. There's a lot going on." Ronnie's eyes narrowed briefly before she let out a sigh of resignation. She supposed he was right… she could hardly blame him for letting it slip his mind, given the situation.

"Alright, you better." She half-heartedly warned. "Anyway… I take it you won't be coming to bed tonight?" She asked with a note of sadness in her voice. Lincoln frowned and shook his head.

"…Sorry." Lincoln said quietly. "I have to keep working-"

"I know, I know… I understand." Ronnie grumbled. "But when this is over, you are getting some  _rest_." She poked her husband in the chest to emphasize her point.

"Trust me, I'm not gonna fight you on that." Lincoln assured her. "Once this job's finished there's nothing I wanna do more than pass out." Well, that and spent some quality time with Loan, but he figured he shouldn't give his wife any more ammo. For now, at least, she seemed satisfied.

"Good. I'll leave you to it, then." Ronnie said. She gave her husband a quick kiss. "Goodnight, Lincoln. Try to get at least a  _few_  hours' sleep, okay?"

"I'll try. Goodnight, honey." The two shared a smile before Lincoln sat down and got back to work. Ronnie sighed softly and left the room, being sure to close the door behind her. As happy as she was to know that Lincoln was seeking treatment, she was sure there was still a long road ahead for him. Still, he was strong… well, no, he was actually kind of a wimp, but she knew he was strong enough to not let this hold him back. He'd overcome everything else life had thrown at him thus far, after all.

Ronnie made her way to Bobby's room and quietly opened the door to check on him. She made this a nightly routine; since she worked so late, she was never able to wish him good night during the week. Quite frankly, it stung a bit. Apart from the weekends, she hardly even got to  _see_ him… and that was only assuming she wasn't called into work to fill in for another chef. It was as if she couldn't even form a relationship with her only son, all because of her job.

…A job she  _hated_  more and more with each passing day.

Her son was sleeping on his side with a calm, peaceful expression on his face. Ronnie couldn't help but smile at the sight. She gently stroked the boy's hair before bending down to kiss his forehead, making him shift slightly in his sleep. It was impossible to overstate how much Bobby meant to her. Someday, she would tell him about the circumstances of his birth… and JUST how special he actually was.

She exited and quietly closed the door behind her. She was about to head back downstairs and collapse into her bed, but something caught her ear: faint music from the room next door. Judging from the dim light from underneath the door, she figured Loan must still be awake. Ronnie hesitated for a moment. It was late, yes… but she hadn't really had any time to speak with her step-daughter one-on-one. With that in mind, she lightly rapped on Loan's door.

"C-come in!" A startled-sounding voice said from within. Ronnie rolled her eyes; it seemed like everyone was jumpy as of late. Though, given the circumstances, she supposed she could hardly blame them. She opened the door to find Loan lying on her stomach, her laptop sitting open before her.

"Oh…! R-Ronnie… hello." Loan stammered. She seemed a bit surprised to see Ronnie there, of all people.

"Hey, Loan." Ronnie greeted her. "How's it going?"

"Um… good." Loan shifted around to a seated position and gave her stepmother a nervous smile. "Did you need me for something…?"

"No, no… just figured I'd say check in, as long as you're still up." Ronnie leaned against the door and crossed her arms. "So… how's everything been going? Are you comfortable?" Loan seemed to brighten up a bit and she nodded.

"Yes, I am. Thank you." Loan said. "Um… are you doing okay? You look… tired." She sounded genuinely concerned… only making Ronnie feel even guiltier than before.

"I'm fine. Just… you know. Work." Ronnie mumbled before sighing softly and scratching the back of her head. "Hey, so… I'm sorry if I've been… distant." Loan frowned and leaned forward a bit.

"Y-you don't have to apologize. You've got work-"

"That's… not what I mean." Ronnie said. "I haven't been very welcoming towards you, and I just want to apologize for that."

"Oh…" Loan muttered. "B-but I think you've been  _very_ welcoming towards me, Ronnie. You're letting me stay here even though I'm, you know… me. That's… that's more than I would expect from anyone."

"Well… I don't want to lie to you, Loan. I wasn't on board. Not at first, anyway." Ronnie noticed Loan's face fall slightly at that.

"I-I'm sorry. I know I just kind of… barged into your life." Loan said quietly. "I-if I'd known-"

"You couldn't have known, Loan." Ronnie assured her. "And you didn't barge in. You… did nothing wrong here.  _I_ did. I said some… terrible things about you. Things I didn't  _mean,_ and that I'll never say again." Ronnie averted her eyes, mulling over her next words. "Loan… I need to ask you something. You don't have to answer if you don't want to, but… are you religious at all? Do you believe in God?" Her stepdaughter seemed to tense up a bit at the question.

"I-I, um…" Loan stammered, fidgeting awkwardly. "I-I dunno if I'd… say that." She sounded almost apologetic, but Ronnie just gave a small chuckle and a reassuring smile.

"It's okay. I don't hold it against you. Lincoln isn't a believer either, but I married him all the same." Ronnie said. If she were to be completely honest, she could hardly blame the girl given the things she'd endured in her life thus far. "I grew up in a catholic family, but I wouldn't really say I follow it. I just kind of… have my own beliefs, I guess. But I do believe in God, and that he has a hand in all of our lives… even if he's not always watching."

"That's… a nice thought, I guess." Loan agreed. Not that it changed her opinion on the matter, but it was strangely comforting at the very least.

"When you came here, you were just trying to get away for a bit. Instead, you found your father." Ronnie explained. "It could have been fate. It could have just been dumb luck. But personally, I like to think that something guided you here… whether you knew it or not. It'd be wrong of me to deny you that. Besides… I hear Bobby likes you, so that makes you alright by me." Loan's face lit up.

"Oh… yes! Bobby's… he's really sweet." She seemed to perk up immediately at the mention of her little brother. "I, uh… I always wanted a little brother or sister, so… you know. It's nice to finally have that…" Ronnie smirked and nodded.

"He's a great kid. I think it'll be good to have someone like you around… you know, someone a bit more on his wavelength." Ronnie sighed. "He's a bit… different from most kids, as I'm sure you've noticed."

"I don't think that's a bad thing," Loan said with a smile. "He's really smart."

"Yeah, well… maybe a bit too smart for his own good." Ronnie groaned, making her stepdaughter giggle softly. "Anyway… we'll talk more over the weekend. I want to get to know you better, y'know?" Loan nodded.

"I'd like that too." She said.

"Anyway…" Ronnie stifled a yawn. "I'm beat. I'm gonna hit the hay, so-"

"U-um… wait..." Loan mumbled, twiddling her thumbs sheepishly. "There's… something I wanted to ask you, if that's okay." Ronnie raised an eyebrow.

"Go on."

"Right, well…" Loan cleared her throat. "You… don't like my mom, do you…?" Her stepmother frowned, her brow furrowing slightly. She couldn't blame Loan for asking… hell, she'd nearly jumped the poor girl the first time they met.

It would be so easy to demonize her mother. To tell her that Lori was a monster, a horrible human being that had done nothing but hurt the people she cared about. But she couldn't; not to Loan. Despite everything, she knew that Loan still loved her mother and, despite her animosity towards the woman, Ronnie knew that Lori loved her daughter with all her heart. She took a deep breath through her nose.

"…That's nothing you need to worry about, Loan." Ronnie said gently. "It's in the past, and it's… between us." Loan seemed a bit disappointed, but she nodded nonetheless. "Hey… don't worry about it. I don't have anything against  _you._ Maybe someday I'll talk about it, but not today."

"…Okay. I understand."

"Good." Ronnie said with a smirk. "Anyway… goodnight, Loan."

"Y-yes, you too." Loan replied with a smile of her own. "And… thank you. For being honest with me, I mean."

"You don't need to thank me for that." Ronnie chuckled. "Don't stay up  _too_  late, alright? You're young still. You need your beauty sleep."

"I'll try. Thank you, Ronnie." The two women exchanged a grin, and with that Ronnie was off, shutting the door behind her. She had the distinct feeling that Loan  _wasn't_ going to go to bed any time soon, but it was worth a try at least.

The girl was her responsibility too, after all.

 

* * *

 

 Once again, Lori couldn't sleep.

It was true what they said: you never really appreciate what you have until it's gone. Not even a week prior, everything had been normal. Well, perhaps not  _normal,_ but normal for her and her daughter. And yet within the course of a single night, that had all changed. Her baby girl had been taken from her; or rather, she had driven her away.

Of course… she supposed this had been building up for a long time.

Lori sighed and got out of bed. She wasn't going to get any sleep dwelling on things like this… perhaps some tea would soothe her a bit. She slipped her feet into her slippers and paused a moment to examine herself in the nearby mirror. Her busted lip was looking a little bit better, the swelling having gone down quite a bit. The bruise on the side of her head, however, may have looked even worse than it had before. Still, she knew fully well that she deserved it. She deserved  _worse_ than that.

As she made her way to the kitchen, Lori couldn't help but notice just how  _empty_ the apartment felt now. She supposed it had  _always_ been this way… a lifeless, excessive testament to her wealth. Just like her expensive car, her designer clothes, the dignified manner in which she presented herself, it was all just a mask to disguise the  _true_  Lori. The same insecure, self-absorbed, pathetic girl she had been twenty-one years ago.

And now, the one light she had left in her life was gone.

Lori filled the kettle with water and put it on the stove, then leaned against the countertop and waited. She hadn't used the thing since Loan left… chamomile tea always helped calm the girl's nerves a bit. Perhaps it would do the same for her.

Lori's gaze fell onto the plane ticket sitting upon the counter. She'd considered just ripping them up far too many times to count, but to turn down an offer like this on such short notice would be career suicide. And right now, her career was pretty much all she had left.

Before long, the kettle began to whistle and she took it off the heat. Lori liked her tea the same way Loan did: with just a hint of honey. She didn't feel like returning to her room at the moment, so instead she sat on the couch and set the mug down on the coffee table to cool. She let out a sigh as she leaned back into the switch and picked up the remote.

As Lori idly flipped through the channels, she eventually came to a fishing program; quite possibly the most boring thing she could imagine, but for now it would do. She wasn't really looking for something to _watch_ , anyway… just something to break the silence.

She sipped her tea, watching two old men trying to catch some trout without really focusing on it. Her nights had been difficult since Loan left; without work or preparations for the move to distract her, there was little she could do but dwell on things.

Lori had taken her daughter for granted… she'd never spent much quality time with Loan. Hell, between her job and Loan's reclusive nature, some days she barely saw the girl at all. They shared no interests… or rather, Lori had never made the  _effort_ to share in her interests. She'd never tried to play games with her, or watch one of her silly cartoons with her, or  _anything._ It also dawned on her that while she knew her daughter like to draw, she was pretty sure she had never seen a single one of her drawings.

What the hell had she been  _doing_ all these years?

It was too late now to make up for lost time. In two weeks time, Lori would be heading off to Japan… alone. Even if that  _weren't_ the case, Loan didn't want to speak to her. And why  _would_  she? Her daughter had every right to be disgusted with her. She'd lied. She'd hurt her. She'd hurt  _Lincoln,_ in ways that unsurprisingly hit far too close to home for the girl. Well, at least now she had received at least  _some_  punishment for her actions. Once, she had thought  _Loan_  to be that punishment… but she'd been wrong. Loan was the greatest gift she had ever been given.

And now she was gone.

Lori set her now-empty teacup on the coffee table and laid down on the sofa. The tea had done nothing to ease her mind, not that she really  _expected_ it to; she'd just needed something to  _do_  besides lay around in her bed, hoping for sleep that she knew fully well would never come.

 

* * *

 

_**Loan.** _

Loan stirred in her sleep.

_**Wake up, Loan.** _

She scrunched her face up further, burying her face into her pillow in annoyance.

_**I said WAKE. UP.** _

Loan sighed and rolled onto her back. She had  _just_ fallen asleep, too. "Go away." She mumbled.

_**Get out of bed.** _

Loan rolled her eyes and turned back onto her side. There was no use trying to reason with it… there was nothing to reason with in the first place. She shut her eyes and focused, reminding herself that there was nothing actually speaking to her. It was just her mind acting up again.

_**I SAID GET OUT OF BED.** _

Suddenly, Loan found herself pulled into a seated position against her will. As much as she tried to resist, it was all in vain… her body was moving on its own. She tried to speak, but she couldn't; it felt as though there was something constricting her throat. All she could do was gasp and wheeze as her body dragged itself out of bed.

_**Good girl. Now go out to the hallway.** _

Loan couldn't fight back. She didn't have any control over her limbs at all, and she could feel her heart racing as the panic began to set in. Nothing like this had ever happened before… it was like her body was a puppet, and she could do nothing but watch in horror as her legs moved on their own, leading her to the door. Her hand reached out and gripped the doorknob, pulling it open.

_**Walk forward.** _

Somehow, Loan managed to force herself to stop, if merely for a moment; directly in front of her sat the banister overlooking the first floor. There was nowhere else to  _go._

_**Walk. Forward.** _

Loan's eyes went wide with horror as her body began lurching its way towards the banister.  _No,_ she thought.  _No, no, no!_ She tried again to cry out for help, but nothing escaped her throat but air. Bobby was so close. Her  _father_ was so close. And yet all she could do was watch as she drew ever closer to her fate.

_**Climb over.** _

Her hands gripped the banister and she hoisted one leg over, then the other. Soon she was standing on her heels on the other side, her feet dangling off the edge; the only thing stopping her from falling was her firm grasp on the banister. She could feel her lungs burning with rapid breaths as she stared down at the first floor. Somehow, it seemed like an even longer drop than it should be… more than enough to end her life in an instant.

_**Let go.** _

Loan clenched her teeth and managed to clamp down even tighter onto the banister behind her.

_**LET GO.** _

The terrified girl still had the fortitude to resist, and resist she did. Even if it took every ounce of strength in her body, she would  _not_  let go.

And then, the pressure around her neck tightened.

Loan choked and gagged as her throat seemed to collapse in on itself. She remembered this feeling… like tendrils wrapped tightly around her, suffocating her. On pure reflex she let go of the banister to grasp at her throat, falling forward and jerking to a stop as the pressure pulled tightly against her neck. Her body was leaning forward at a forty-five degree angle, and the tendrils choking her were ironically the only thing stopping her from falling.

Then, she heard it: something that made her blood run cold in an instant. A deep, masculine chuckle… not something within her mind, but  _right beside_  her ear. It was a familiar voice… one Loan knew all too well.

**"Don't scream."**

The tendrils released Loan and she fell forward, the ground below rapidly rushing to meet her.

 

* * *

 

Loan shrieked in fear as she awoke, bolting upright to a seated position. Her heart was pounding rapidly, her chest heaving with unsteady breaths; she swallowed, taking a moment to get her bearings before glancing around. She was in her bedroom… it had all been a dream.

" _Loan!_ " Lincoln cried as he threw open the door, rushing to his daughter's side. "What's wrong?!"

"D-dad…"

"Are you okay? I heard you scream." Lincoln asked in a gentle yet clearly worried tone. Loan stared at him in silence for a moment before looking away, chewing her lip apprehensively; then, she gave a small nod.

"Y-yes… I'm alright," The girl said. "Just had a bad dream…" Her father breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank God… I thought you'd been hurt." He said quietly. Loan frowned and looked at him again.

"…I'm sorry." Loan muttered. "I, uh, have nightmares sometimes, a-and I kind of… scream. I should have told you-"

"No, no… it's fine." Lincoln assured her, gently squeezing his daughter's shoulder and giving her a warm smile. "I'm just glad you're okay. Does this… happen often?" Loan sighed.

"Only sometimes," Loan explained. "I don't usually dream… I think my medication has something to do with it. But… sometimes." Lincoln nodded in understanding.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked. "Do you want to talk about it…?" She still looked shaken, and he could feel her shoulders trembling slightly; nonetheless, she gave him a reassuring smile.

"I'll be fine. Th-thank you." She said. Lincoln was far from convinced, but he gave a small nod anyway.

"…Alright." He said as he pulled away and stood upright. "Just… let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, dad." The two exchanged another smile before Lincoln walked out, shutting the door behind him. Loan waited until she was sure her father was out of earshot… and then, her lip began to tremble as her eyes grew damp. She clamped a hand over her mouth to stifle a sob; even though her memory of the nightmare had already begun to fade, her fear had not. She could still remember being unable to speak, her body moving on its own…

…That voice. That horrible, cold voice.

Loan sniffed and rubbed at her eyes. Part of her wanted to go tell her father about it, but the truth of the matter was that she had never told  _anyone_ about the exact nature of her intrusive thoughts, not even Dr. Patel. She may not  _literally_  hear voices, but as far as she was concerned this was barely any better than that. Surely, she'd be sent away to the madhouse if they knew the truth.

The mere thought of that happening terrified Loan more than anything else.

Loan wiped away the last of her tears and took a deep breath to steady her nerves. It wasn't real. She just had to remind herself of that: none of it was real. Not the dream, not the voice in her head, none of it. And with each passing minute, the dream faded more and more from her mind.

The troubled girl glanced at the clock; it was 6:21 AM, not that Loan had planned to go back to sleep anyway. She turned to sit on the side of the bed and one by one took her medications, once again in alphabetical order and once again being sure to arrange them neatly, labels outward. With that done, Loan slowly got out of bed and stretched, her shoulders popping audibly. She knew that her meds would kick in within an hour, and then she'd feel a lot better. But for now, she needed to use the restroom.

She shuffled her way down the hall towards the bathroom. The morning light was beginning to filter in through the windows, bathing the interior in a pale blue glow. Loan still wasn't used to being up at such an early hour, but she supposed this sort of thing was normal… and she wanted to at least  _try_ to be normal. She stifled a yawn before reaching for the doorknob, only to let out a small yelp and draw her hand back as she felt a jolt of static electricity. Loan groaned; of  _course_  she'd get a shock. She'd been shuffling her socks against the carpet after all. With that, she gripped the doorknob and opened the door.

"Oh!" Loan gasped, as she saw none other than Bobby standing at the sink and brushing his teeth… fully clothed, thankfully. His eyes widened slightly as he noticed his flustered sister standing in the doorway.

"…G'mornin'." Bobby mumbled through a mouthful of toothpaste before spitting it into the sink.

"U-um… hey…" Loan stammered sheepishly. She may not have actually  _seen_ anything, but still… she very well  _could_ have. "S-sorry, I should have-"

"Knocked. I know." Bobby sighed. "It's okay. I'm not used to having to lock the door, so… you know. I don't blame you." He gave his sister a brief half-smile, which she returned in kind.

"I… guess we both have a lot to get used to, huh?" Loan said with a small laugh. Bobby nodded.

"…Yeah." Bobby muttered, picking up the dental floss. "Anyway, I'm almost done, so…"

"Oh, um, no need to rush. T-take your time…" Loan assured him. She was impressed by how diligent he was; when she was his age she  _never_  flossed, despite being consistently told to do so. Of course, that fact plus her diet of junk food had resulted in several cavities that needed to be filled… no simple task for the neurotic girl.

His hair was wet too, and even more of a mess than usual… Loan could only assume that he'd just taken a shower. He was already dressed for the day, clad in his red hoodie and brown cargo shorts as usual. Strangely though, he seemed  _taller_ somehow. A quick glance down revealed why: he was standing on a little stepstool to reach the sink.

… _He was standing on a little stepstool to reach the sink._

Loan had to bite her lip to suppress a squeal. She'd always had a weakness for cute things, but somehow this little guy was on a whole other level. Did he even  _know_ how adorable he was? Perhaps it was just the fact that he was herbrother that made her so susceptible to his charm. Either way, she  _really_ wanted to give him a hug, but that'd be weird… their newfound kinship aside, she still barely knew the boy.

"Okay. I'm done." Bobby said, snapping Loan out of her thoughts. He dropped his floss into the nearby wastebasket before hopping off his stepstool and folding it up, setting it underneath the sink. "You can-" He began, only to trail off as he took a closer look at his big sister. He tilted his head slightly, focusing his gaze on her face.

"Umm…" Loan couldn't help but avert her eyes for a moment before glancing back at him. "A-are you alright…?" Up till now, her brother had largely avoided prolonged eye contact… not that she could blame him. She tended to do the same, after all.

"…Are you?" He asked.

"Why do you ask?"

"Your eyes." Bobby muttered, pointing at them. "…They're red. Were you crying…?" Loan frowned and tensed up slightly.

"…No, I'm fine." Loan lied. "I just, uh… I rubbed them a bit too hard when I woke up." She gave her brother a forced smile that did little to convince him; nonetheless, he nodded.

"…Okay. I'll… see you later, then." Bobby muttered before heading past his sister and towards his bedroom. Loan felt bad. She didn't want to  _lie_ to the boy, but he was still just a kid… the last thing she wanted to do was upset him. With a small sigh, Loan shut the door behind her.

"Bobby! Can you come here a second?" Lincoln called out from his studio right as Bobby was reaching for his doorknob. Bobby groaned and hung his head; he was in for it now. Surely, his father had heard about yesterday's argument with the teacher somehow.

"…Coming…" Bobby mumbled and made his way down the hall. It wasn't like he had much choice… he just had to go face the music. He pushed open the door to find his father sitting in his chair with a benign smile on his face.

"Hey, buddy." Lincoln greeted his son before gesturing to a nearby chair. "Here, take a seat. Oh, and lock the door, okay?"

"…Okay." Bobby reluctantly did as he was told, clicking the lock shut and sitting down.

"Thank you." His father said, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "So… listen-"

"I-I'm sorry."

Lincoln blinked. "Um… what?"

"Th-this is about the homework thing, right…?" Bobby stammered, wringing his hands in his lap. "I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean to get so worked up, I-"

"Whoa, hold up…  _what_ homework thing?" Lincoln asked, raising an eyebrow in confusion. His son swallowed and averted his eyes.

"Er… n-nothiiiing." Bobby tried his best to sound innocent; his father simply narrowed his eyes at him. Lincoln wasn't buying it for a second, but he hadn't gotten any calls from the school so he figured he should drop it for the time being. Besides, there were more pressing matters at hand.

"Okay…  _anyway._  I needed to talk to you about something." Lincoln muttered. "So… you remember how I said Loan's a bit mixed up, right?" Bobby nodded.

"…You said she's been through a lot." He said.

"She has. So she gets a bit…" Lincoln paused, searching for the right words. "…Worked up from time to time." Bobby frowned.

"Worked up how…?"

"Well…" Lincoln sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Loan gets these… panic attacks. Do you know what those are?"

"I guess… it means she panics, right?" Bobby had never heard that exact term, but he certainly knew what  _panicking_ was at least.

"Well… yes. I guess that  _is_  pretty self-explanatory, huh…" Lincoln chuckled before growing serious once more. "Anyway… sometimes, these can get pretty bad."

"How bad?"

" _Really_ bad." Lincoln emphasized. "It doesn't happen very often… hopefully, you'll never have to see it at all _._ But if you  _do,_ I don't want you to be scared. Just… if it looks like she's panicking, come get me. Or your mom, if I'm not around."

"But what if neither of you are around…?" Bobby asked. Lincoln's mouth hung open for a moment; he hadn't considered that. He and his wife  _did_ go on dates, after all. As of late they'd felt comfortable enough leaving him on his own… aside from saving money on a sitter, they knew Bobby could take care of himself. He was a smart boy, he knew not to open the door for strangers, and he'd been thoroughly instructed on what to do in case of an emergency. But Loan was a different matter. On one hand, they now had an adult around to care for him in their absence.

On the  _other_  hand… this would also leave Loan in  _Bobby's_  care.

"…Call us." Lincoln said. "And stay with her until we get there. Just… just try to comfort her. Tell her that everything is going to be okay, that she's not dying-"

" _Dying?!_ " Bobby gasped.  _Dammit._

"N-no, it's, um…" Lincoln stammered. "Panic attacks can make you feel like you're dying, and…" Lincoln trailed off; his son looked absolutely horrified by this piece of information. Still, it was important that he understood this. Lincoln sighed before continuing. "Bobby, look… I know it sounds bad, and that's because it  _is._ That's why she needs you, at least until we can get to her. Do you understand?" Bobby's brow scrunched up in concern. He didn't like the sound of any of this… comforting people was something far outside his realm of understanding. Nonetheless, he nodded, earning him a gentle smile from his father. "Good." Lincoln said. "Also, she's a bit…  _different,_  in a lot of ways. You may notice her doing odd things from time to time, but try not to think much of it. She's-"

"Loan's not  _crazy,_ is she…?" Bobby asked. Lincoln shook his head.

"No… no, she's not. She's just… got a lot going on with her." Lincoln explained in the simplest terms he could manage. "She's had a really hard life, and I want to turn that all around for her."

"Is that why she was crying?"

"Crying…?" Lincoln leaned forward a bit more, a worried look crossing his face. "Bobby, was she  _crying?_ "

"I…  _think_ so." Bobby muttered. "Her eyes were red. She said is was nothing, but… I dunno. I think it was  _something._ " Lincoln took a deep breath and massaged his temples; he instantly regretted not staying with her longer when she'd woken up.

"…Loan had a bad dream. She'll, ah… she'll be okay, though." Lincoln assured his son. Bobby wasn't sure just what kind of nightmare could be bad enough to make an adult cry, and quite frankly he hoped he'd never find out. Bobby averted his eyes for a moment, chewing his lip apprehensively.

"Dad… what happened to her…?"

"I… can't say." Lincoln said quietly. "You're too young, and even if you weren't it wouldn't be my place to talk about it." Bobby was far from satisfied by that answer, but he could tell that his father wouldn't budge on the issue.

"…Okay." Bobby said. "I understand, I think. Um… anything else…?"

"Nah, I think that's everything." Lincoln said, a small smirk crossing his face. "You're a capable kid, Bobby. I'm sure you can handle this." Bobby couldn't help but smile himself at his father's compliment. "Go on, now. Your mom's probably getting started on breakfast. I bet she could use her favorite little helper."

"…'Kay." With that, Bobby got up and left the room. Once he was gone, the smile faded from Lincoln's face as he turned back to his work. It was already Wednesday and he was still far from finished. His talk with Bobby hadn't taken long, but he was still far from finished… and every second spent not drawing was a second he wasn't making progress. The prior day's appointment with Dr. Patel had eaten up a lot of his time, and-

...Wait.

It suddenly dawned on Lincoln that he hadn't followed up with Lori after the appointment… as much as he wanted to put that aside for now and get back to work, he figured it was a fairly important matter. With a frustrated groan, he picked up his phone and searched through his contacts until he found Lori, then selected it. It rang for quite some time, and for a moment Lincoln thought she wasn't going to answer… but then, he heard a click followed by a groggy voice.

'… _Hello.'_

"Er… hey, Lori…" Lincoln said sheepishly. "S-sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

'… _You didn't.'_ Lori grumbled.

"Are, uh… are you okay…?"

' _I will be once this fucking coffee's ready.'_ She said.  _'How's everything been going?'_

"Good. We had our meeting with Dr. Patel yesterday… it went well." Lincoln explained. "Um… she said you'll be handling costs, so… thank you for that. I mean it."

' _Least I could do,'_ Lori muttered.  _'Loan's well?'_

"Yeah…" Lincoln said quietly. "Um… she had a bad nightmare. She seemed pretty shaken when she woke up, but besides that…" He trailed off as he heard Lori take a breath.

' _That… happens. It's been a while since the last one, but it happens.'_ Lori said.  _'Were you there for her?'_

"Of course I was." Lincoln said. "She said she was fine, but Bobby thinks-"

' _BOB-'_  Lori began before cutting herself short.  _'O-oh… right. Sorry. Continue.'_

"Right…" Lincoln cleared his throat. "Well, he thinks she was crying." He heard a soft groan through the phone.

' _Loan can be… stubborn, sometimes.'_ Lori explained.  _'She tends to hide how she's really feeling because she doesn't want to worry anyone. Don't be afraid to push her a bit… it's best she gets these things off her chest.'_

"Right… got it." Lincoln said.

' _Anything else?'_ His sister asked.

"No… no, that's it." Lincoln muttered. "Just wanted to keep you posted."

' _I see… thank you.'_ Lori said.  _'And, um, listen… I think it's best if I keep my distance for a bit. Until I'm closer to leaving, at least. Between you and Loan, I… I just feel that's the best thing I can do right now.'_ Lincoln frowned.

"Are you sure…?"

'… _Yes.'._ Lori said with some hesitation.  _'I'll still be available of course, should there be an emergency or anything like that… but beyond that, I think I should give you space for now. BOTH of you.'_ He had to admit, she wasn't really  _wrong_.

"…I understand." Lincoln said quietly.

' _Thank you.'_ Lincoln could hear the stress in his big sister's voice.  _'I'll… talk to you later, then.'_

"Alright. Take care of yourself, Lori." He replied. Lori let out a low chuckle.

' _I always have.'_ She said before ending the call.

 

* * *

  

As Bobby neared the stairs, Loan stepped out from the bathroom.

"Oh… hello again, Bobby." She greeted her brother with a warm smile.

"…Hey." Bobby replied with a small nod. He took a moment to look over the woman standing before him. She didn't  _look_ crazy… disheveled, definitely. Tired, certainly; maybe even a bit weird. But not  _crazy;_  she didn't seem crazy when he spoke to her either. A bit awkward and unusually anxious for a woman her age, but that was something he could relate to.

In any case, he was at least pretty sure he liked her.

"Bobby…?" Loan tilted her head slightly. "Is everything alright?" She asked.

"…You are." Bobby muttered.

"I am what…?"

"It's nothing…" Her little brother said with a shake of his head. "Um, mom's making breakfast, so… y'know. Probably won't take long."

"Oh… okay. Th-thank you." For a moment, neither said anything further; Loan seemed to be slightly antsy.

"I'll see you downstairs, I guess…"

"W-wait…!" Loan blurted out. Bobby turned back to his sister with a look of confusion on his face.

"…Yeah…?"

"Um, well… I…" Loan fidgeted awkwardly, tapping her fingers together. This was weird. She  _knew_ this was weird. But she couldn't handle it anymore… he was just too cute. "C-can I… t-touch you hair…? Like… just for a second…?" She asked apprehensively. Bobby raised an eyebrow. He was used to having his head patted… for reasons he didn't understand, pretty much all of his relatives on both ends of the family found it necessary to do so every time they saw him. Well, save for  _one,_ of course. Still,  _asking_  to do so was new one.

"Um… I guess…?" He muttered. Loan's face lit up in a way that Bobby had never seen before, as though she were too excited for words. Slowly, she reached out with a trembling hand and gently placed it on his head. She gave his hair a light ruffle, marveling at just how  _soft_ it was before reluctantly withdrawing her hand.

"Th-thank you." She squeaked.

"Um… y-you're welcome." Bobby stammered with a reddened face before heading down the stairs. That had been  _very_ unusual, but he was glad it'd made her so happy at least.

Just as he was about to enter the kitchen, he heard an ecstatic high-pitched squeal from upstairs. Yep… she was a weird one, all right. But Bobby smirked nonetheless; after all, he was kind of weird himself.

 

* * *

 

 

Breakfast was once again delicious, as expected. Ronnie had made french toast this time… it was one of the few things Lori had known how to make, but this was on a whole other level. While Lori's were tough, flat, and bland, Ronnie's were light, fluffy, and sweet even  _without_ syrup. To Loan, whose diet consisted almost entirely of junk food and takeout, it was almost mind-blowing.

"So, Bobby... I hear you two have been getting along well." Ronnie said. Bobby swallowed a mouthful of french toast before responding.

"...Yeah. We have, I guess."

"That's right." Loan said with a smile. "He's my best friend."

"I thought I was your only friend…?"

"Well… that would make you my best one too, wouldn't it?" She answered. Bobby thought about this for a moment before giving a small nod.

"…Makes sense."

Ronnie smirked as she watched the two talk. It was unusual to see Bobby warm up to someone so quickly… save for Leni, though that was hardly surprising. They continued to talk throughout their meal too. Well,  _mumble_ in Bobby's case, but quite frankly that was the best one could expect from him. Despite his broad vocabulary, he was a boy of few words.

"Alright, I'd better get back to work." Lincoln said once they had all finished. "Thanks for the delicious breakfast, Ronnie." He added, kissing his wife on the cheek.

"Yes, I know." Ronnie said boastfully. "Go on, now. Provide for your family."

"Love you too, honey." Lincoln chuckled before heading back upstairs.

"Bobby, go get ready for school, okay?" Ronnie told her son. Bobby nodded and slid out of his seat.

"…Seeya later." He said, giving a small wave to his sister.

"You too." Loan replied, giving a wave of her own before Bobby left.

"Alright… time to wash up, then." Ronnie sighed, getting to her feet. Loan frowned as she glanced back down at the table; four sets of syrup-coated plates and utensils.

"Um… can I help…?" Loan offered. Her stepmother seemed a bit surprised by this… not that Loan could blame her. She'd only been leeching off them this whole time, providing nothing in return for their kindness. Still, Ronnie smirked.

"Sure, that'd be great." She said. "Thanks, Loan." The two divided their efforts into stacking up two sets each and carrying them into the kitchen, though Loan's hands trembled all the while in fear she may drop a glass. She was no less nervous when she placed them into the sink, setting them down as gently as possible. "Relax, girl." Ronnie snickered, patting the girl on the back hard enough to make her yelp in surprise. "It ain't heart surgery."

"S-sorry…" Loan said with a nervous laugh. "…It's been a few years since I've done this. I-I don't eat much that doesn't come out of a bag or a takeout box, so you know…"

"Don't worry about it. It's easy." Ronnie said as she turned on the sink and started cleaning. "Thanks again, though. I've got a lot to get done before I have to go to work."

"Oh…" Loan muttered, rolling up her sleeves and joining by the older woman's side. It hadn't dawned on her that, with Lincoln struggling to get back on schedule, all of the house's chores would fall into Ronnie's hands. "You know… I… wanted to learn to do a few things too. To help out, I mean."

"Yeah? That's funny… most kids would try to get  _out_  of doing chores." Ronnie said, before groaning under her breath.  _Great,_ she thought.  _I'm calling a twenty-one-year-old KID now. Lord, I'm getting old…_

"W-well, I figured since you're letting me stay here… I should try to help out however I can, right?" Loan said sheepishly. Ronnie smirked.

"I'm not complaining. Tell you what… I've gotta do the laundry after this. I'll show you how, if you want." Ronnie offered. A small grin spread across her stepdaughter's face, and she nodded.

"Y-yes, that'd be great."

"Alright, back to the grind…" Lincoln grumbled as he stepped into his studio, taking a moment to stretch before sitting down. And yet once again,  _just_ as his stylus was about to touch the screen, his phone rang out with the  _DING_  of a received message. Lincoln shut his eyes, taking a deep breath through his nose. He exhaled before picking up his phone to find that he'd received a text from Lori.

 

**) There's one more thing you deserve to know**

 

Lincoln's brow furrowed. He quickly typed out his response.

 

**What? (**

 

Lori seemed to be taking some time to respond; just as he was about to text her again, he received two messages from her in succession.

 

**) About Luna**

**) She knew.**

 

* * *

 

 

 

****


	6. Helping out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man, I ain't even gonna say "I'll try to be faster" this time. Chapters gonna come out when they come out, I guess.
> 
> Anyway, chapter 6 is here! This is the end of Act 1, so to speak... I'll post a short interlude chapter within the next couple of days, and after that the story can actually get MOVING again.
> 
> And speaking of chapter 6, I'm going to try... TRY to get the ball rolling on More Than A Sister again.

"Luna? Hey, earth to Luna?"

"Huh…?" Luna snapped out of her daze and looked towards her concerned wife. "O-oh… 'sup, babe?"

"Are you all right?" Sam asked. "You've been out of whack ever since the Vegas show… what's going on with you?"

"Oh… uh, nothin'." Luna muttered. "Just a bit tired, I guess." Sam was far from convinced… Luna's performance at the last show had been so poor that even the fans had noticed. She'd gotten a proper chewing out by Jerry over that, and promised she'd be more focused next time. And yet since then she'd been faring no better, to her wife's mounting concern. At first she thought it might be motion sickness, as the tour bus had been known to make her queasy in the past. But, no… she was sure that whatever this was ran deeper than that.

"Come on, Luna… talk to me," She said. "You're not acting yourself. Are you sick?" She put a hand on Luna's forehead, but she certainly didn't  _feel_ warm. "Maybe we should just cancel the next show-"

" _No!_ " Luna gasped, making Sam jump. "I-I mean… no, it's fine. I just need some rest is all. Promise." She gave the blonde a small smile that did little to ease her worries; nonetheless, she sighed and sat down at the edge of the bed.

"If you say so. But-"

 

' _TAKE MY ADVICE AND DON'T BE A MOOCH! GRAB LIFE BY THE LIPS AND GIVE IT A SMOOCH!'_

 

Luna sighed and sat up, fishing her phone out of her pocket. She'd expected this would be coming eventually… not that it made her any less reluctant. "Sorry babe… gotta take this. Can you, um…"

"Yeah, I know. Private family stuff." Sam said with a chuckle. "Take your time." She gave her wife a kiss on the cheek before heading towards the front of the bus. Luna took a deep breath before answering the phone.

"…Hey, Linc-"

' _You knew.'_

Luna's brow furrowed. She'd expected him to be mad over ratting him out, but he sounded  _beyond_ mad. "Er… knew what?"

' _About Loan.'_ Lincoln said.  _'About my fucking DAUGHTER. You knew.'_  Luna's blood ran cold; how the hell had he found out? Loan hadn't known. Lori certainly wouldn't have told him…

…Right?

"Th-that's… I… Linc, look…"

' _How long?'_

"Lincoln-"

' _HOW LONG?!'_ Her brother shouted. Luna frowned, hesitating a moment before answering.

"…Since the beginning." Luna admitted.

' _What the hell is wrong with you, Luna?! How the HELL could you keep this from me?!'_ Lincoln spat. Luna sighed and massaged her temples. She supposed this had been a long time coming… somewhere in the back of her mind, she'd always doubted this could remain a secret forever.

"Linc… what would  _you_ have done?" She asked quietly. "If you were in my shoes, would you have dropped a bomb like this?"

' _Of course I-'_

"You were twelve, Lincoln." Luna said. " _Twelve._ D'you really think you would've been able to handle something like that? The truth would have ruined your life."

' _Even so, to hide this from me for so long…'_

"It wasn't an easy choice, bro… and trust me, I didn't do it for  _Lori's_  sake. I did it for yours,  _and_ for Loan's." The rocker muttered. "I didn't want either of you to get hurt. You've seen what she's like… you've seen how  _fragile_ she is."

' _She's not FRAGILE, Luna.'_ Lincoln hissed.  _'She's strong… stronger than you and Lori think she is. You KNOW what she's been through, don't you?!'_

"Of  _course_ I do. But she's… ugh, I don't know." Luna grumbled. "…Does she know?"

' _Yeah. She… took it about as well as you'd expect.'_  Lincoln admitted.  _'But she's alright. She's here, and she and Bobby-'_

"Wait… she's  _there?_ "

' _She's staying here from now on, Luna.'_ Lincoln said. His sister couldn't believe what she was hearing; Lori had always kept the girl on a short leash, especially after  _that._

"Wow… uh, okay. Wow. Don't tell me Lori just… dropped her into your lap?"

' _She agreed it was the best thing for her… it was either that or dragging her off to Japan.'_ Her brother said.

"Dammit, Lori…" Luna scoffed under her breath. Lori had mentioned the job offer to her about a month prior, saying that she was strongly considering it. Luna, of course, had told her flat out that it was a terrible idea… but clearly, her older sister had not listened. "Well, I'm glad she's with you, then." It wasn't a lie. Luna knew that Lori loved her daughter more than anything else, but nonetheless her actual parenting skills left a lot to be desired. Lincoln, on the other hand, was a great father to his son… if anyone was cut out to care for Loan, it was him. "How, uh… how is she doing…?"

' _Fine.'_ Lincoln said curtly.  _'She's adapting. We're all adapting. But that's not the issue here.'_

"…I know." Luna sighed. "Listen, Lincoln, I-"

' _SAVE IT, Luna.'_ The furious man spat.  _'You've been lying to me for twenty-one years. There is NOTHING you can say to change that.'_ Luna hung her head and nodded. He was right: regardless of intentions, she'd betrayed both his and Loan's trust.

"I'm… I'm sorry." She said, barely above a whisper. For a few moments, there was no response; all she could hear was her brother breathing.

'… _I'm not going to tell Loan.'_ Lincoln said.  _'I_   _should, but I won't. See you, Luna.'_

"Lincoln, wait-" Luna began, but Lincoln had already ended the call. The rocker sighed and set down her phone before slumping back into her bed.  _Now_ she felt sick.

"Hey babe, are you…" Sam trailed off as she laid eyes on her wife, who somehow looked even more out of it than before. "Luna, what's wrong…? Did something happen?

"…Nothing." Luna muttered before turning onto her side. "I'm… I'm just gonna rest for a bit, okay?" Sam frowned, her gaze lingering on Luna for a moment before she gave a small nod and got to her feet.

"Let me know if you need anything, okay?"

"Yeah… I know." Luna said half-heartedly. "Thanks, Sam."

 

* * *

 

Lincoln took a deep breath and leaned back in his chair to collect his thoughts. Perhaps he'd been too hard on Luna… admittedly, she'd been placed into a situation in which there  _was_  no 'right' thing to do. Hell, he may have done the same thing had he been in her position. Still, he couldn't help but feel angry and betrayed. He knew he'd forgive her eventually, or at least be willing to move past it, but not yet. In any case, he needed to get back to work. Lincoln rubbed his tired eyes before sitting upright and picking up his stylus.

Normally, Lincoln  _liked_  working… he found it therapeutic and it worked wonders to clear his mind of stress. But when things came down to the wire like this, the work  _was_ the stress, and there was little he could do but buckle down and push through it.

At one point, this had all come easy to him. He'd never had any trouble meeting deadlines early on in his career, but as the years went on the work just kept getting harder and harder. Or, perhaps, he was just slowing down. That, of course, was one of the downsides to working out of one's home: the risk of getting too comfortable. He'd slacked off a bit too much early in the month, and now he was paying the price. Then again, he never could have foreseen the Loan situation.

Lincoln frowned as his thoughts returned to his daughter. Once again, he couldn't help but dwell on the absurdity of trying to focus on work at a time like this. He was grateful at least that Loan and Bobby could keep each other company, but that was only once the latter got home from school. Until then Loan was cooped up in that room all by herself. Granted, that was how she had spent the brunt of her life… a fact that made him feel a bit sick to his stomach. He knew that Lori had just been trying to protect the girl, but enabling that sort of lifestyle could  _not_ have been good for her mental health. In any case, he wanted to change that, and he knew Loan did too.

Somehow, he would get his daughter back on her feet.

 

* * *

  

"…And that's pretty much that." Ronnie instructed as she flipped the washing machine closed. "You just turn it on, let it do its thing, and then put 'em in the dryer. I'd show you, but… y'know. Nothing to dry just yet."

"It… looks easy enough." Loan said. She wasn't sure what she had expected, really… it wasn't like something as simple as doing laundry would require some sort of arcane ritual. "How, um… how long does it take…?"

"A bit," Ronnie said. "Usually I just put them in the dryer right before I leave for work and let Lincoln hang them, but… obviously, he's a bit too busy for that."

"He doesn't usually work so hard, right?" She asked. Ronnie sighed and shook her head.

"…Not usually. He fell behind a bit this month. It doesn't happen too often, and it hasn't been  _this_  bad in a while. But he'll pull through… he always does." She said. Loan gave a small nod of understanding, but she still felt she was at least partially to blame for all this. Heck, she was sure she was  _entirely_ to blame. But before she could dwell on it any further, the door opened and Bobby shuffled in wearing his backpack.

"…Hey."

"Hey, sweetie." Ronnie said, giving her son a hug. "You got everything?" The little boy nodded and shifted his backpack slightly. Loan couldn't help but notice that, despite clearly being intended for boys his age, it was just slightly too big on him. It was tempting to go for a hug too, but that'd be weird. And she'd already been weird enough for one day.

"…I guess I'll see you later." Bobby muttered.

"Y-yes. See you later!" Loan said with a smile, settling on giving her brother a small wave for now. Bobby's near-perpetual frown curled upwards into a smirk for a brief moment.

"Be safe," Ronnie added.

"I will." The boy said. "…Bye." With that, he headed out the door into the garage. Loan furrowed her brow in concern; he was shy, yes, and undoubtedly a very soft-spoken kid.

…But why did he always seem so  _sad?_

"Um, Ronnie…" Loan began. "Is… is everything okay with Bobby…?" Her stepmother cocked an eyebrow.

"Yeah… why?"

"He just, I don't know… it feels like there's something wrong." Loan muttered. "He seems… sad." Ronnie let out a small chuckle.

"Ah… don't worry about that." She assured Loan. "He's been that way for as long as I can remember. He's just kind of a mopey kid."

"Mopey, huh…"

"Doesn't help that he's never made any friends," Ronnie sighed. "But to tell the truth, he's never really  _tried._ He's always been too shy to really  _talk_ to anyone. That's why he doesn't take the bus anymore… it made him uncomfortable."

"He… doesn't take the bus?" Loan asked. "Then how-"

"Bicycle," Ronnie explained. "You wouldn't think so, but he's actually pretty damn good at riding it. Or… better than you'd expect, at least."

"H-he bikes to school  _alone?_ " Her stepdaughter gasped. "Isn't that d-dangerous?"

"Ah, he's fine, he's fine…" The older woman explained, waving her off. "He's a responsible kid. Always makes sure to stick to areas with lots of people around, and Hazeltucky's a pretty safe town. Besides… it's the only way he gets any exercise. I'm sure it's no surprise that he's not a very  _athletic_ kid." Loan nodded; she definitely couldn't deny that. His short stature was only accentuated by his scrawny build. In any case, Loan was still concerned for her little brother.

"…It must be lonely." She said quietly.

"Chill," Ronnie patted the girl on the back, jostling her a bit. "He's got you now, after all. I'm sure he'll perk up in no time." Loan gave a small smile.

"Did you ever think about having another…?" She asked. "You know… to keep him company?"

Whatever she'd expected her stepmother's response to be, it wasn't  _this:_ Ronnie's grin faded in an instant, and she visibly tensed up. Loan could even feel her fingers clench around the back of her sweater. "U-um… Ronnie…?" She stammered apprehensively. "Is… is something wrong?" This seemed to snap the woman out of her daze.

"We… no." Ronnie let out a sigh as she shook her head. "…We haven't." There was an underlying sorrow to her words that even Loan could pick up on.

"Ron-"

"Anyway, there's more I need to get done before work. You gonna tag along?" Ronnie asked with a playful, if noticeably forced smirk. Something Loan had said had definitely stuck a nerve with the woman. As much as she wanted to know why, or at least  _apologize_ for upsetting her, something told her that pressing the issue any further wouldn't be the best idea.

"Um… y-yes." Loan said, forcing a smile of her own. "That'd be great."

 

* * *

 

It was a pretty nice day, as far as Bobby was concerned. It was crisp, but not so chilly that he'd needed to wear long pants… his hoodie was enough. He slowed to a stop as he came to a crosswalk, looked both ways, and then continued on. Bobby knew the rules of the road… his parents had drilled them into his head long before they'd ever allowed him to ride anywhere on his own. Not that they'd  _needed_  to explain the dangers to him… he was a naturally pessimistic boy, after all.

Before long, Bobby had arrived at the school. Just as he was riding up, however, his front wheel locked up and the bicycle flipped forward. Bobby was launched off the bike with a yelp, and he grunted in pain as he crashed against the hard pavement. He lay there for a moment in a daze; that had been a rough fall.

"Whoa, are you okay?!" A voice said. Bobby felt a pair of hands helping him up.

"Y-yeah…" Bobby grumbled. "Thank-" His voice caught in his throat as he looked up to see none other than Hayden, wearing a smug grin on his face as per usual.

"You really gotta be more careful,  _Dobby._ " Hayden sneered, jerking the smaller boy to his feet before roughly dusting him off. "You could get hurt. Maybe you should get some training wheels?"

"…I  _know_  how to ride a bike." Bobby huffed. He stomped over to his bicycle and picked it up, only to notice that there was a thick branch jammed between the spokes; no doubt it had deliberately thrown into his wheel as he was riding. He turned to glare at Hayden. "Y-you did this, didn't you…?"

"I have  _no_ idea what you're talking about," Hayden said with an exaggerated shrug. "It ain't  _my_ fault you're clumsy." The boy chuckled and headed towards the school. Bobby glanced around, noticing the other students scattered about; many were trying not to look at him, while others were snickering into their palms. They'd all seen it, of course… and Bobby had no doubt that even if he went to a teacher about the incident, none of them would vouch for him. He sighed and pulled the branch out of the spokes before wheeling his bike the rest of the way to the bike rack. He locked it, gave a few tugs to be sure it was secure, then headed inside.

As usual, the hallway lockers were crowded… many of the students had already  _gathered_ their things, but still found it necessary to clog up the area chatting with one another. Bobby had no idea why they did this… the hallway  _just_ past the lockers was nearly empty, and had more space to boot. "'Scuse me," He mumbled as he tried to reach his locker. "Trying to get through…" As usual, nobody heard him over the chatter, and the boy was far too timid to speak up. Instead, he simply grumbled under his breath and pushed his way through.

Just as Bobby reached his locker, the morning bell signified that it was time to go to class, and immediately Bobby found himself being bumped and jostled by the throngs of students rushing to their classrooms. He let out another sigh of resignation as he was forced against his locker. Once the crowd petered out, he waited a few moments to insure that he was in the clear before finally opening his locker. He'd set the combination to 1903: the birth year of George Orwell. He'd  _considered_ 1984, but he figured that would have been too obvious.

…Well, at least he'd  _figured_ that, but by this point he was more than aware that any literary reference would be lost on his peers.

Bobby gathered his books and made his way towards his class. He had no need to rush… he had more than ten minutes, after all, and he may as well savor the peace and quiet while he could. Besides, he was still aching a bit from the fall.

"Good morning, Robert." Mrs. Heathers said, standing just outside the classroom door to greet her students.

"…Good morning." Bobby said quietly. Just as he was about to go inside, however, his teacher held out her arm to stop him.

"Wait… Robert, what happened to your knee?"

"My knee…?" Bobby looked down to find that he had skinned his knee… he hadn't even noticed over the dull pain in his shoulder. It wasn't really bleeding, but it was definitely raw and wet-looking. "O-oh… I fell off my bike." He muttered. "It's fine, I-"

"Nonsense, Robert." Mrs. Heathers said with a shake of her head. "The last thing you want is for it to get infected. Go to the nurse and get it taken care of… I won't mark you late as long as you come back to class immediately afterwards. Do you understand?"

"…Yes, Mrs. Heathers." Bobby said before skulking off down the hall. He winced with each step; now that he was  _aware_ of the scrape, a stinging pain surged through his knee each time he bent it. Bandage or not, he knew this would be an annoyance throughout the rest of the day, and perhaps longer than that.

All in all, an average start to the day for Bobby.

 

* * *

  

"So… you get things figured out?" Charlie mumbled through a mouthful of terrible lunchroom pizza. "The 'home stuff', I mean."

"…Yeah." Bobby replied simply, picking away at his own meal of mac-n-cheese. Charlie waited a few moments for a follow-up to that; realizing he wasn't going to get one, he cleared his throat.

"Soooo… which was it? Good or bad?"

"Oh… um, good. I think…" The quiet boy muttered. "It was just some stuff with Loan, but-"

"Who's Loan?"

"My sister." Bobby said. Charlie cocked an eyebrow. As far as he'd known, Bobby was an only child.

"Since when have you had a  _sister?_ " He asked.

"…Since Friday." Bobby explained.

"Wow… uh, congrats, then." The chubby boy said with a grin. "I've got a baby sister too, so I know-"

"No, she's older."

"…Huh?" Charlie blinked; that didn't quite make sense. "Er, how does  _that_  work, exactly…?" Bobby glanced up from his food.

"…What do you mean?" He asked.

"I mean… you said she was born on Friday." Charlie said. "So how is she  _older_  than you?"

"She wasn't born Friday… that's just when she showed up," Bobby explained. "She's a grownup."

"Er… oooookay…" His lunch buddy averted his eyes, drumming his fingers against the table in thought. "So… you have a grownup sister."

"Yes."

"…That you didn't know about."

"Uh-huh."

"And she just… showed up."

"…Yeah." Bobby said with a small nod.

"Isn't that a bit, I dunno…  _weird?_ " Charlie asked.

"…I guess." Bobby muttered. "She's not mom's daughter, though… she's dad's. I don't think he knew about her either."

"That… seems like something he'd know about." Said Charlie; Bobby simply shrugged.

"He says he didn't. He thought she was just my cousin, but… now she's my sister, and she lives with us. I dunno." The boy sighed. "…She's nice, though. I like her." Charlie just stared at him in baffled silence. Finally, he let out a sigh of his own and rested his pudgy face on his palm, taking another bite of his pizza.

"…You live a strange life, Bobby."

 

* * *

 

By the time Ronnie had left for work, Loan felt far more exhausted than she knew she should. Hell, she'd barely even done any chores herself… she'd simply observed as Ronnie handled most of the work. Loan wasn't sure if this was because she was out of shape or simply lazy. Probably the latter.

_**You know it is.** _

Loan squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath. There it was again, just when she thought it was going to be a quiet day. Even if she only skipped her meds for one day, it usually took a week or so for the intrusive thoughts to die down. This was something she'd had to learn for herself; based on the research she'd done on her own, this was a bit unusual… yet another reason she refused to discuss the issue with anyone. She released her breath and took a glass from the kitchen cabinet. Soda would only get her so far… even she needed proper hydration from time to time.

Loan filled the glass with water from the faucet and tapped it against the countertop three times before drinking. This was another thing she found it necessary to do, even though she knew fully well it  _wasn't._ It only applied to drinks in a glass, too… bottles and cans were fine. She used to try and rationalize  _why_ she did these things, but Dr. Patel had assured her that there was nothing wrong with her unusual behaviors as long as they weren't hurting her or anyone else.

She placed the empty glass upside-down in the sink and left the kitchen, passing through the dining room and into the living room. She paused at the foot of the stairs and glanced around the comfortable home…  _her_ home, now. It was so far removed from what she was used to. Quiet, but for entirely different reasons. Spacious, not stifling. Comforting, not constraining.

New.

Different.

…Unfamiliar.

_**You don't belong.** _

"…I  _do_  belong." Loan muttered under her breath.

_**If you were so sure of that, you wouldn't have doubts.** _

" _Stop it._ " Loan hissed.

_**You're insane. They'll see that soon enough, if they haven't already.** _

"I'm not  _insane!"_

_**Then why do you talk back?** _

Loan's brow scrunched up in frustration, her lips pressing together in a thin line as her hand gripped the banister tightly. She huffed and stormed upstairs, not even bothering to count the steps this time. For once, it had a point: trying to  _speak_  to it was a pointless endeavor. There was nothing to speak  _to._ The best thing she could do was ignore it. It was  _all_ she could do, really. She stopped at the top of the stairs and took a few deep breaths to settle her nerves. She remembered what her father had said on her first night there… that it was normal to feel unsure about all of this. But she was here now, and she was  _happy,_ and-

" _FUCK!_ "

Loan cried out in shock and jumped so hard that she nearly lost her balance and fell down the stairs. She took a moment to calm herself before looking towards the source of the noise: it had come from her father's studio.

"Dad…" Loan rushed down the hall. His door was slightly ajar, so she didn't bother to knock; inside, she found her father hunched over his desk with his head buried in his hands. "D-dad… are you okay?" She asked, but received no response. She swallowed and inched a bit closer. "Da-"

"I fucked up." Lincoln said in barely above a whisper. Loan frowned and moved a bit closer.

"What do you mean…?"

"I  _fucked up._ " Her father repeated. " _Again._ I didn't pay attention to what I was doing, and… and I fucked up." Loan glanced at his monitor. It didn't LOOK like he'd made any mistakes… in fact it looked amazing so far, far more detailed than her own work.

"I… I don't see-" Then, she noticed it: there was only one layer. He had put the line art directly over the pencils. "O-oh…" Loan stammered, before turning back to her father. "Well… maybe you can fix it?" Lincoln sighed and sat back in his chair.

"I can't." Lincoln muttered. "I could copy the layer and isolate the line art, but it wouldn't look right… I could never send that in. Hours of work, wasted. I'm not getting those back." Loan looked at the monitor again. She couldn't tell exactly how long it had taken him, but it looked like he'd almost been finished. Between that and the level of detail, it was clear that he had been working on it for quite some time.

"I… um…" Loan stammered. She wasn't sure what she should say to the man… he sounded utterly defeated. "I'm… sorry… if it weren't for me-"

"Loan, no. Stop that… you had nothing to do with it." Her father assured her. "I'm only in this mess because I'd made this same mistake two other times this month. Hell, even  _before_ that I hadn't been taking it as seriously as I should have. That's how it is, though… the longer you work at something, the more complacent you get. You'll understand someday." Despite everything, Loan couldn't help but feel a bit uplifted by that… the fact that her father thought she could work at  _anything_  was pretty encouraging.

"W-well, that's…" Loan began with a nervous laugh, but shook her thoughts aside; this wasn't about her, after all. "Um… what are you going to do…?"

"…I don't know." Lincoln admitted. "I don't know if I can do  _anything_ at this point. I just… don't know." There was an uneasy silence between the two, and for a while neither spoke. Despite her father's reassuring words Loan still felt terrible about the situation; whether or not she was the cause of it, it hurt seeing him struggle like this. She racked her brain for some sort of way she could help him, or at least  _encourage_  him, or…

…Wait.

"Uh… dad…" Loan mumbled, fidgeting awkwardly. "What if… what if I helped?" Lincoln turned to face her with a curious expression on his face.

"Helped…?" Lincoln asked, and Loan gave a small nod. "Helped how?"

"Well… I… draw myself, you know?" Loan said. "M-mostly sketching, but… I  _do_  have a tablet, so… maybe I could… I don't know. I'm sorry." She sighed, hanging her head. "It's a dumb idea but-"

"It's not dumb, Loan." Lincoln said with a small smile. "And I appreciate the offer, but…" He trailed off as he glanced over at his monitor. The truth of the matter was, he had a long way to go…  _too_ long. Chances were that even if he buckled down and busted his ass without sleep for several days, he'd still never be able to finish. The man frowned and tapped his finger against the armrest in thought.

"Dad?"

"…I'll tell you what." Lincoln muttered. "What's your email address?" Loan tilted her head slightly.

"MsJitterBug ..."

"That m-s or m-i-s-s?"

"Um, m-s. Why?" She asked. Her father swiveled back around to his computer and opened up Outlook.

"I'm sending you a test page," He explained as he drafted a new email. He attached an image file then sent it. "I'm gonna take a break for an hour or so… do as much as you can, okay? And don't worry if you can't. This is… probably much different than what you're used to." Loan's face lit up and she nodded.

"I-I won't let you down…!" She said in as determined of a tone as she could muster… only to quickly return to her usual meek demeanor. "Or… I'll  _try_  not to, at least…" Lincoln chuckled and got to his feet.

"Don't sweat it. Like I said, this is new to you." He said, giving his daughter a gentle pat on the shoulder. "Just trying means a lot to me." Loan smiled, averting her eyes as a light blush crossed her face.

"…I'll do my best." She assured him.

"I know you will." Lincoln said with a grin. He gave her shoulder a light squeeze before leaving the room; once he was gone, Loan let out the breath she'd been holding since he'd said 'yes'. To her, it wasn't just a matter of trying… she  _had_  to do this right. She owed it to him.

"I… I can do this." She told herself before rushing off to her room.

_**Nah. You're gonna fuck this up, just like everything else you do.** _

Loan ignored it and searched through one of her boxes for her tablet.  _It doesn't matter,_ she told herself.  _This is just a test page._ She fished out the tablet, thankfully with the stylus still clipped into its holder, and plugged it into her computer before sitting down.

The email her father had sent was surprisingly in-depth, explaining which brushes to use for what, which line size and width to use for different purposes, pressure settings… it was somehow even more complicated than she had expected. For a brief moment, Loan considered giving up right then and there… but she shook the thought aside.  _Don't overthink things. You know what you're doing._

_**But do you REALLY?** _

"…Yes." Loan said, and got to work.

 

* * *

  

Lincoln pressed his palms against the small of his back and leaned back, letting out a small grunt of relief as he felt his spine pop. He cracked his neck, then his wrists, then his knuckles before finally flopping back onto the couch. He let out a long, relaxed sigh as he sank into the soft cushions; sitting in an office chair for hours upon hours had left him terribly sore. He wanted to take a couple of painkillers to soothe his aching muscles, but he was already too comfortable to bother getting up.

The exhausted man rubbed at his eyes. The past week had been stressful, to say the least. Between Loan, his work, and his lack of sleep, it felt like his body and mind were slipping into auto-pilot. It was almost as if he were in a drunken daze; he even found himself nodding off at times, only to snap awake thinking that the events of the past few days were an odd dream. Of course, the less he slept, the more mistakes he made… and the more mistakes he made, the less time he had to sleep. It was the cycle of the struggling artist, and while at one point he had been able to handle such a rigorous schedule, by this point he felt like he was at the verge of collapsing at any moment.

"Ronnie's right… I'm NOT as young as I used to be." Lincoln groaned. As if his own failures weren't enough, now he'd been reduced to accepting his daughter's help. While he appreciated it greatly, it only served to make him feel even more pathetic than he already had. It was his job,  _his_  responsibility, and here he was barely even able to keep his head up. A small part of him even hoped Loan  _wouldn't_ be able to manage it, just to spare the girl from taking on his burden. But, if she did, he'd have no choice but to accept her help. There was no other way he'd be able to meet his deadline.

Lincoln gingerly shifted around and lied down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling in contemplation. While he doubted one missed deadline would be enough to sink his career, slipping up on a project  _this_ big would undoubtedly deal a massive blow to his reputation. In all honesty, it wasn't so much about the money, but rather his career itself. As difficult as it could be, he loved his job, he loved the industry, and he loved the fact that he could make an impact on it, small though it may be. As a child, he'd had a  _number_ of dreams for the future… some stupid, and some unrealistic. This was the only one that stuck, and he didn't want to lose that.

Lincoln felt his eyelids growing heavy. He let out a long yawn and shut his eyes; as much as he wanted to stay awake, he knew that he needed to use this break to take a nap if he wanted to keep functioning. Soon enough, he had drifted off into a deep slumber.

"-ad."

Lincoln's face scrunched up in annoyance. He had  _just_ fallen asleep.

"…Dad, wake up."

"Nnnnngh…" He grumbled, rolling onto his side. A tiny hand grasped his shoulder and gave it a little shake.

"Dad, I'm home."

"Wha… ugh…" Lincoln let out a groan and opened his eyes, blinking a few times before pushing himself upright. He turned to see his son standing beside the couch, staring at him with a raised eyebrow. Lincoln sighed, sat up, and rubbed his tired eyes. "Bobby… why are you back so early…?"

"…I'm not." Bobby said. Lincoln stared at him in confusion for a moment before glancing over at the clock; it was nearly 3:30 PM. He'd overslept.

"Oh  _fu-_ " Lincoln hissed, before remembering that his seven-year-old son was standing right beside him. "…Udge _._ " Bobby tilted his head.

"…Are you okay?" He asked. His father sighed and scratched the back of his head.

"It's… don't worry about it. How was school?" Lincoln muttered.

"Fine." Bobby said. "Are you sure you're okay…?"

"Yeah, I'm good." Lincoln forced a smile and patted his son on the head. "Just needed a little rest. You go on upstairs, okay?" Bobby nodded and shuffled off, leaving his father to wake up in full. Lincoln once again massaged his eyes, cursing under his breath. As if it wasn't bad enough that he'd overslept, he barely felt better rested at all. He shook himself awake before standing up with a grunt.

After finally taking a few painkillers, Lincoln trudged his way upstairs and gently knocked on Loan's door.

"C-come in!" She called. Lincoln entered to find his daughter sitting at her computer, hunched over in what looked like a  _very_  uncomfortable position, but she didn't seem to mind. Her face lit up as she saw him enter. "Hey, dad… um, has it been an hour already…?" Lincoln raised an eyebrow.

"It's been three hours, Loan. I overslept." Lincoln muttered apologetically.

"Oh!" Loan gasped. "I guess I was so focused I didn't notice…" She gave a flustered laugh and scratched the side of her head. Lincoln just chuckled.

"Well, let's see how you did…" Lincoln peeked over her shoulder to find that she had already completed the basic outline; it looked pretty good, too. Good enough to meet the editor's standards, at least. However, she was still working on the smaller details with far less success… clearly, that was an area that still needed improvement.

"S-sorry…" Loan mumbled, looking a bit downcast. "I tried, but-"

"You did great," Lincoln cut in with a smile. "Really." Loan seemed a bit flustered by the compliment, but smiled nonetheless.

"So… can I help…?" She asked hopefully. Her father frowned slightly; he  _really_ wasn't too keen on his daughter helping him with his work, but he had little choice… there was no way he'd meet his deadline on his own. Lincoln sighed in resignation.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Loan?" He asked. "It's okay if you don't-"

"I do." Loan assured him. "It's… the least I can do, you know?" Lincoln thought it over for a few moments before finally nodding.

"Alright," He said. "You handle the basic outlines, I'll handle detailing. Sound good?"

"Y-yes!" Loan said with some small measure of determination. Lincoln chuckled and gave his daughter a hug.

"Thank you, Loan." He muttered. "I promise, I'll make this up to you."

"You really don't need to…"

"I know," Lincoln assured her. "But I will anyway. You send me that, alright? I'll send you the rest of the pages."

"R-right… got it. I'll do my best." The two exchanged a smile before Lincoln left to return to his studio. Loan took a moment to stretch her back before turning back to her computer.  _What,_ she thought,  _don't have anything to say this time?_ She waited a moment, smirking as she received no response.  _Yeah, that's what I thought._

 

* * *

  

Bobby sat on the toilet lid and winced as he gingerly peeled off his bandage. Like before, there was little blood… instead there was a gross yellowish stain soaked into the pad.

"Ugh…" Bobby grumbled, dropping the used bandage into the trash bin. He grabbed the Neosporin off the countertop, put a dab on his scrape, and covered it with a new bandage before hopping off his seat.

He was thankful that the rest of the day had passed without incident; no bullies, no issues with Mrs. Heathers, no unwelcome 'modifications' to his bike. All in all, a decent enough school day by his standards.

The best he could hope for, anyway.

Bobby rolled up his sleeve to take a look at the bruise on his shoulder. It wasn't  _too_ bad… and luckily, it was in a spot that was easy to hide. He sighed and left the bathroom, shutting off the light before closing the door.

As he headed for his room, he noticed that his sister's door was now open. He hadn't wanted to bother her before, but as far as he was concerned an open door was an invitation to enter. Bobby peeked inside, seeing Loan hard at work on her computer.

"…Hey."

"Huh…?" Loan blinked and looked up from her work; she glanced towards the door and beamed as she spotted her little brother standing in the doorway. "Oh! Hello, Bobby… when did you get back?"

"A little bit ago," Bobby said as he shuffled into the room. "What're you doing?"

"I'm helping dad with his work… or, um, trying to at least…" Loan muttered.

"Helping dad…?" Bobby looked at the monitor, his eyebrows rising slightly in surprise. She had just started on a new page. He remembered she had mentioned she liked to draw, but  _this_ was unexpected to say the least. Clearly, his father was in far tighter of a spot than he had imagined. "…You must be good." He mumbled.

"Th-thanks… I'm not  _that_ great, though…" Loan stammered. "I'm still a bit worried that it won't be good enough." Bobby looked up at the screen again. Her line art looked fine to him… not that he would know one way or the other. In any case, she seemed too busy to play any games… and he certainly didn't want to jump into his homework right after getting home from school.

"…Can I watch?" He asked. "I'll be quiet…"

"Oh, um… sure!" Loan said. "I-it'll probably be boring, though…"

"That's fine." Bobby climbed up onto her bed and sat at the end. "…I kind of like boring." Loan grinned and turned back to her monitor. For a few minutes no words were exchanged between the two as Bobby watched his sister work.

"You don't need to be  _that_ quiet, Bobby." Loan said, breaking the silence. "How was your day?"

"Fine," Bobby muttered. "You know… the usual."

"Boring?" His sister asked. Bobby smirked and nodded.

"…Boring. But not the good kind."

"I never liked school much, either." Loan admitted. "I, um… I don't think anyone does, really. It's just one of those things you have to deal with, you know? Otherwise you'll just… end up like me." She let out a small chuckle, but Bobby frowned nonetheless.

"What's so bad about that…?" He asked.

"Um…" Loan already regretted her choice of words. "D-don't worry about-"

"You didn't go to school…?" He pressed on. Loan let out a sigh.

"…I did," She explained. "For a while, anyway. I dropped out in high school because of… stuff. Got my GED though. Kind of like… finishing high school without finishing it. I dunno if that makes sense…"

"I… think I get it." Bobby said. He fell silent again, continuing to watch her work. It was a bit interesting; unlike their father's Cintiq, Loan was using a simple tablet. He wasn't quite sure how she could deal with the disconnect between the screen and her actual motions, but she seemed to be managing it just fine.

"So who's your favorite superhero?"

"Huh? Oh, um… I don't know." The young boy mumbled. "I don't really have one. I don't read comics." Loan stopped mid-line, turning to stare ah her little brother as though he were from another planet.

"You… don't like comics?" She asked. Bobby shook his head.

"No."

"But… but you're a  _kid._ " Loan sputtered. "Our dad  _draws comics!_ " The little boy merely shrugged.

"I know… but I don't like them." He said. "I've tried to, but I don't. There's… too much to keep track of. Too many different titles to follow. And it's all just the same thing over and over and over… I don't know. It's not for me."

"You really don't like  _any_ comics…?"

"None of the ones I've read…" Bobby grumbled.

"…Have you ever read anything by Alan Moore?" Loan asked. "Or Neil Gaiman?"

"I… no, I haven't." The boy admitted. "I'd be willing to try, though." Loan smirked.

"I could lend some to you sometime… I think you'd like them." Loan said, before letting out a small sigh. "Actually, never mind… you're too young for most of them…"

"…I read grown-up stuff, you know…" Bobby reminded her. His sister frowned and thought for a moment.

"Well… we'll see." Loan said; she'd simply ask her father about what was appropriate. Not that she didn't trust her little brother, but she still figured she should run things by her dad. The last thing she wanted was to make him or Ronnie angry.

… _Especially_ Ronnie.

"Must be cool, though…" Bobby said. "…Working on something you like, I mean."

"Yeah, I guess it's-" Suddenly Loan froze, her eyes going wide as the realization hit her. Her stylus fell from her hand and clattered onto the desk. "O-oh my Gosh…" She gasped into her palm.

"…Loan?" Bobby raised an eyebrow as he took note of his sister's sudden shift in demeanor. "Are you alright…?" Loan gave a small nod.

"I-I'm… I'm working on Ace Savvy…" She muttered. "I'm working on  _Ace Savvy._ Like, the  _actual_ Ace Savvy…! And it's going to be  _published!_ " Were it not for the  _other_  events over the past week, this may have been the coolest thing to ever happen to her. For his part, Bobby could only watch in bafflement as the normally quiet young woman let out an excited squeal and spun around in her chair.

"Um… c-congratulations…?" Bobby stammered. Loan sprang to her feet so quickly it made him jump.

"Y-you don't understand…" Loan snatched up her sketchbook and flipped through it before showing Bobby a page; there were a number of sketches of Ace Savvy in a variety of poses. They were certainly good, but they looked nothing like the Ace Savvy  _he_ knew… he was drawn slimmer, younger, and almost… anime-like? "Ace Savvy's my favorite superhero!" Loan explained. "H-he's my favorite, and now I-I-I'm working a real Ace Savvy comic, and it's going to be published, and… and…" She forced herself to stop babbling; she was getting too worked up again. Loan took a few deep breaths before slumping back into her chair.

"Are… are you okay?" Bobby asked, clearly concerned for his sister. She nodded, taking a few more breaths before speaking.

"S-sorry… I, uh… sometimes I get a little worked up about the stuff I like…" Loan mumbled sheepishly.

"…It's okay," The boy said with a small smirk. "I get excited about my stuff too. Not as much, but… you know." 'Not as much' was an understatement; he'd never seen anyone quite so giddy about  _anything_.

"I-I need to do my best," Loan gasped. "I can't mess up, I need to try harder than I've ever tried at anything before." She tossed he sketchbook back onto the bed and swiveled back around to resume her work. Bobby finally let out the breath he'd been holding in since Loan's little outburst began. Though he could kind of understand… if he were to have a short story published in Uncanny Magazine, he'd likely react much the same as his big sister had. But for now, she seemed to have calmed down… if anything, she seemed even more determined than before.

"…Guardians of the Galaxy."

"Huh?" Loan glanced over her shoulder.

"Guardians of the Galaxy," Bobby said again. "They're my favorite." Loan blinked, then a grin crossed her face.

"You have good taste, Bobby." She said with a giggle before getting back to work. Bobby glanced down at the sketchbook that was lying beside him; it was interesting how much her own style differed from what she was doing now. Granted, she was essentially tracing over already-drawn art, but her own work was pretty good too. He assumed she wouldn't mind if he took a look, so he picked up her sketchbook and began flipping through it.

As expected, it was all anime-style art. Bobby liked anime himself, but not nearly to the extent that Loan did… clearly, this girl was a full-blown otaku. He spotted several familiar faces from a variety of media amongst the sketches, as well as many he did not recognize.

…And then he came to the most recent drawing.

It was two handsome young men… or even  _pretty,_ Bobby might say. They were hugging each other.

…Or  _embracing_ , perhaps.

In any case, they were holding one another very closely, their gazes trained firmly on one another; there seemed to be some kind of thread between their mouths. A string, perhaps? Bobby had no idea. What he  _did_ know was that the two men were naked. Or shirtless, as least… the image was cut off at the waists so he couldn't tell.

Something told him it was the former, though.

"By the way, Bobby, do you _aaAAAAAAAAAHHHHH_!" Loan yelped and snatched the book out of his hands, hugging it tightly against her chest. The two stared at each other in silence, their faces turning a deep scarlet; Bobby had turned so red that his skin nearly blended in with his hoodie. "Th-th-that was a commission…!" Loan sputtered. "I-I don't usually draw that kind of stuff, I, um… I…"

"O-okay." Bobby squeaked, sliding off of the bed and onto the floor. "I, um, have do go do my homework, so… s-see you later!" Bobby quickly scurried out of the room, and a moment later Loan heard his door slam shut. Loan groaned and buried her face in her hands. Once again, she'd embarrassed herself.

_**Hey, at least you didn't show him your tits this time.** _

Loan sighed and looked at her sketchbook. It hadn't been a lie… it  _was_ a commission. Even though it was more suggestive than explicit, it was still a big step outside of her comfort zone. But she was paid to draw it, so she drew it. Not that she was sure why she offered commissions in the first place… it wasn't like she needed the money. Maybe it was just so she had  _some_  sort of obligation.

_**Or, you just want to feel USEFUL to someone for once in your life… not that you ever WILL be.** _

Loan frowned and shut the sketchbook. She could be useful… she was being useful  _right now._  Loan tossed the sketchbook aside and took a moment to flex her shoulders before swiveling back around and getting to work.

And work she did, well into the next morning… and well into the next night, stopping only to take a short nap and play with Bobby a bit, per her father's assurance that he had enough to work with for a few hours. Even after only a couple of days, she was already feeling the stress of the work. Her wrist hurt, her back hurt, her head hurt from staring at a computer screen for so long… she could only imagine how her  _father_  felt. But they both pressed on through the exhaustion and, very late Saturday night, Loan's role had been finished. She'd finished the base lines on every remaining page, and all that was left was for her father to complete the details.

Loan flopped back onto her bed and let out a long sigh. She was no stranger to staying awake for several days at a time, but usually she just kind of lazed about. Having to actually focus on something for that duration was new to her, to say the least… not to mention exhausting.

She'd offered to help her father with the detail work as well, but he'd assured her he could take it from there. 'You've helped more than enough', he'd told her. Between that and his praises of her work, she couldn't help but feel a small surge of pride in her heart. Self-doubts aside, she'd been able to help.

_**It's going to be terrible. They'll never hire your dad again, and it will be all your fault.** _

Loan knew that wasn't true. Even she knew she'd done a good job… her father wouldn't have let her help if she didn't. This job was important to him, after all.

She wasn't sure how long she lay there like that; she was almost too tired to even sleep, and instead seemed to drift in and out of a groggy haze. She remained like this until a gentle knock on her door snapped her back to reality.

"…C'min." Loan slurred. The door opened and none other than her father shambled in, looking like some zombie out of a horror movie… not that she could blame him.

"Hey," He said with a tired grin.

"…Hey..." Loan replied with a smile of her own. She propped herself up as much as she could manage… which right now wasn't very much at all. "Did you finish…?"

"I finished…" Lincoln mumbled as he staggered over and sat down at the end of her bed, flopping back onto the bed much as she had. He let out a long sigh of relief as he sank into the soft mattress. "F'rgot how good a  _bed_ feels…" Loan chuckled.

"So… back to normal?" She asked. Her father nodded.

"Back to normal… 'til my next job. Usually doesn't take too long for that." Lincoln stifled a yawn. "…But it won't be like this. Not gonna dick around this time… gotta keep on schedule…" Lincoln tried to pump his fist in determination, but his arm just weakly flopped against his chest. "But for now, 'm jus' glad it's done. Couldn't've done it without ya, Loan…" He tilted his head slightly to smile at his daughter, which she returned in kind.

"So what're you gonna do t'morrow…?"

"Mmmm…" Lincoln shut his eyes in thought. "Well… been meanin' to take another swing at Beastborne… I could use a good coach, though."

"I'd like that." Loan said.

"Good, good…" Lincoln mumbled, trailing off at the end; Loan waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"…Dad?" No response… he was out cold, his chest slowly rising and falling with rhythmic breaths. Loan giggled and shut her eyes as well. "G'night."


	7. Interlude I

**Interlude I**

* * *

 

 

_Lori was roused from her slumber by a loud, shrill noise. She groaned as she sat upright, blinking the sleep out of her eyes; surely it couldn't be morning already? A quick glance at the clock confirmed that, no, it was not. It was only 1 AM._

" _Wha-" The sound rang out again, and Lori's eyes shot wide open: it was a scream of terror. "LOAN." She gasped, quickly scrambling out of her bed. She didn't bother putting on her slippers. Lori dashed out of her room, paying no mind to the cold tile beneath her feet. "LOAN!" She shouted as she threw open the door to her daughter's bedroom._

" _NO, NO, NO!" The girl was in the throes of a terrible nightmare, flailing and convulsing in her bed as she screamed in fear. Lori rushed to her daughter's side._

" _Loan… Loan, calm down!" She cried, gently grasping the girl's shoulders and trying to shake her awake. Lori winced as Loan's fingernail grazed her cheek, but didn't back down for a moment; she shook Loan a bit harder to wake her. "LOAN!" The terrified girl's eyes snapped open._

" _NO!" Loan shrieked as she saw the figure looming above her. She recoiled and backed against the wall before curling herself into a ball. "S-STAY AWAY!"_

" _Loan, baby, it's me!" Lori said. "It's me... it's okay." Loan ventured a peek, only to see that it was indeed her mother standing before her._

" _M-mom…"_

" _Baby-" Before Lori could finish, her daughter reached out and grabbed her by the arms._

" _H-h-he's HERE!" Loan whimpered. "H-he found, me, and he's HERE, and he-"_

" _Baby, nobody's here!" Lori assured her, but Loan rapidly shook her head._

" _H-he IS!" The girl whimpered. Her chest was heaving with labored breaths and tears were streaming down her face; she was having a panic attack. "H-he found me, he's-"_

" _He's not here, Loan." Her mother said gently. "Nobody's here. You were having a nightmare… that's all."_

_Loan took a moment to glance around the room. Indeed, they were alone… there was nobody in the room save for her and her mother. Loan swallowed and looked back to the concerned woman._

" _I-I-I-"_

" _It's alright, Loan. Everything's alright." Lori cooed as she gently embraced her trembling daughter. "Don't speak, just focus on breathing. You're going to be okay, baby." They stayed like that for several minutes… Lori stroking the girl's back as she clung tightly to her, hard enough that her fingernails were digging into her mother's skin. Clearly, this would need more than just comforting words. "Loan, listen…" She said, slowly pulling back from her embrace… not that her frightened daughter made it easy to do so. "I'm going to get you some Xanax-"_

" _N-NO!" Loan cried, desperately clutching the woman's arm. "Please…!"_

" _Loan. You're going to be fine." Lori said in a slightly stern tone. "I'll be back in a minute. Just… just BREATHE, baby." Loan searched her mother's eyes for a few moments before giving a small, reluctant nod. Lori gave a supportive smile and stroked the girl's cheek before hurrying off to her bedroom._

_Lori flicked on her bathroom light and opened the medicine cabinet, taking out the bottle and shaking a tablet into the palm of her hand. She'd once kept the drug in Loan's bathroom, but that had proved to be a bad idea: the girl had begun taking them regularly, even for the most mild of attacks, and had grown utterly dependent on them. Now, Lori had to regulate it herself._

_A quick glance in the mirror confirmed that Loan's nail had indeed scratched her, leaving a small cut dangerously close to her eye. Lori frowned and grabbed a bandage from her drawer, quickly putting it over the cut before rushing back to her daughter's room. Between Loan's general lack of self-care and her frequently chewing on her nails, they were often long and ragged; Lori sighed, making a mental note to clip them in the morning._

" _Here, sweetie." Lori said as she returned to her daughter's room. Loan was sitting on her bed with her knees drawn close to her chest. She was still shaking, and while they had stabilized a bit her breaths were still rapid and strained. "Take this… it will-" Loan wasted no time in snatching the tablet from her mother's hand and swallowing it._

" _Th-th-thank… thank…"_

" _Ssshhh. Don't try to speak… just try to breathe." Lori instructed. Loan gave a small nod and shut her eyes. She breathed in through her nose, held it for a few seconds, then released it. Breathe, hold, release. Breathe, hold, release. Loan kept this up for some time, her mother remaining silent by her side all the while. After about fifteen minutes, she opened her eyes again and looked at Lori. "Are you okay?" Lori asked._

" _Y-your cheek-"_

" _It's fine. Don't worry about that… are you okay?" She asked again. Loan frowned and looked straight ahead again, shaking her head._

"… _H-he was here."_

" _Loan, it was only-"_

" _I KNOW it was a dream…" Loan muttered. "B-but he was here. And he… he… oh, God…" Loan buried her face in her knees as the tears came once more. Lori sat on the edge of the bed and rubbed the girl's back._

" _Loan, that man is never going to hurt you again… I PROMISE you that." Lori said quietly, not that it did much to ease the troubled girl's mind. "Would you like me to stay with you tonight…?" She asked. For a few moments there was no response, but then her daughter gave a small nod. "Scoot over, then." Loan did as she was told, and Lori got into bed beside her. She picked up the blanket off the ground and draped it over the two of them._

" _Mom…" Loan whimpered. Her mother gave her a gentle smile._

" _It's okay, baby. Come here… everything's going to be okay. Momma's not going to let anyone hurt you." Lori said in as soothing of a tone as she could muster. Loan buried herself in her mother's arms and bawled freely into her chest._

_Lori paid no mind to the tears soaking through her pajama top. She simply held her frightened daughter as her body heaved with sobs, gently shushing her and stroking her hair until her tears died off and she fell into an uneasy sleep. Not that she was going to return to her own room… she would not be leaving her daughter's side tonight, nor would she be getting any sleep herself. She could only take some solace in the fact that it was the weekend, and she'd be able to take a nap during the day._

_To see her baby girl in such a state was the greatest pain Lori had ever felt. Loan had grown into a young woman… hell, in a few weeks' time she'd be turning twenty. But on nights like these, Lori could only see her as the child she had once taken for granted. That monster had BROKEN her, perhaps permanently._

_Lori blamed herself for what happened almost as much as she blamed HIM. She had accepted that monster into her home. She had failed to see the signs that were right in front of her. She had let him hurt her daughter for TWO YEARS. And now, she was like this… even if she were to take a miraculous turn for the better, Loan would bear those scars for the rest of her life. The memory of seeing that man atop her daughter, DEFILING her, was an image that would forever be burned into her mind. One of her greatest regrets was not killing the bastard right then and there… second only to allowing it to happen in the first place._

_Lori frowned as she looked down at the precious girl sleeping on her chest. Even now, she looked so frightened… so hurt. Lori's greatest fear was that someday she might come home to find her daughter had taken her own life. She'd only ever told Dr. Patel these fears, and she'd been assured that such concerns were normal. Not that it made things any better._

_She looked up at the ceiling, idly stroking her daughter's hair as she slept. She'd tried so hard to give her daughter her life back, but the poor thing hadn't been able to manage it. This life of isolation was no way for a girl to live… but it was the best thing Lori could do for her now._

_If nothing else, she was safe here._

 

* * *

 

Lori lay awake in her bed, as she had nearly every night of the past three weeks. Sleep came rarely for her these days… hell, it barely came at  _all._ She'd simply stay awake until her body couldn't take it anymore. But tonight there was more than just her daughter's absence weighing on her mind.

Today, she would be leaving for Japan.

She'd kept true to her word: she'd mostly kept her distance from Lincoln and Loan, save for a few calls to check in on how her daughter was doing. Apparently, she was doing quite well… she was happy, she was well cared for, and she was getting along well with her newfound family. As much as this reassured Lori, it did little to ease the pain in her heart.

Today would be the first time she'd see Loan since she'd come to gather her things. Hell, it'd be the first time she'd even  _spoken_ to her daughter since then. Were it not for the circumstances she'd be happy about this; instead, the prospect of saying goodbye to her little girl made her stomach twist into knots.

Unsurprisingly, she'd had little appetite as of late. This wasn't to say that she wasn't  _hungry,_ but she just couldn't bring herself to eat much. Still, she knew fully well she would end up scarfing down a Cinnabon as soon as she arrived at the airport. Maybe even  _two;_  she figured she'd earned herself that, at least.  _Treat yo'self,_ as some may say.

Lori sighed and shut her eyes. She still had four hours before she'd need to be up… she figured she should try her best to get SOME sleep while she could.

But she knew she wouldn't.


	8. Saying Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y'know what, I ain't even gonna make an excuse. I have just been a very lazy boi as of late, and I apologize for the wait. Unfortunately I can't guarantee things will be any faster for a bit, as this is always a busy time of year for me.
> 
> Anyway, I'm tired so I'll keep this short. Gonna try my hardest to finish off More than a Sister next, I promise. In other news, if you haven't been to my tumblr me and Lioxdz have been collaborating on a comic, featuring none other than lil' Bobby himself. Anyway, without further ado:

The mood at breakfast was noticeably dour; unsurprising, considering what the day would hold for Loan.

The troubled girl sighed and absentmindedly picked at her food. Unsurprisingly, she didn't have much of an appetite. It had been three weeks since she'd first entered her father's life, and since then, she'd quickly adapted to her new home… and her new family. She was happy there, she was happy with  _them,_ and she didn't regret her choice to stay with them in the slightest. But today, it would be official: today, she would be saying goodbye to her mother.

It was a sobering thought, to say the least.

"Loan? Are you finished?" Ronnie asked, snapping the girl from her daze.

"Um…" Loan glanced down at her plate with a frown; she'd barely even finished half, but she just couldn't force herself to keep eating. "…Yes. Thank you. It was delicious." She said, forcing a smile. Ronnie nodded. Normally, she'd be annoyed that someone had left so much of her food untouched, but she could hardly blame the girl given the circumstances. Loan stood up to gather her dishes, but Ronnie stopped her.

"I've got it," Ronnie assured her stepdaughter. "You can go relax, okay?" Loan opened her mouth to protest before shutting it and giving a reluctant nod. In truth, she  _wanted_ to help out today just to give her some kind of distraction, but then again in her current state she was almost certain she would break something.

"A-alright. Thanks, Ronnie." She said. Ronnie offered the girl a warm smile before taking her plate into the kitchen, and Loan got to her feet. "I, um… I guess I'll be in my room if anyone needs me." She muttered.

"Sure." Lincoln replied. He and Bobby watched as she skulked out of the dining room; once she was gone, Bobby turned to him with a frown.

"Dad… is Loan gonna be okay…?" Bobby asked.

"Yeah… yeah, she'll be fine. This is a rough day for her, that's all." Lincoln said, forcing a smirk. "You go get ready for school, okay buddy?" Lincoln said with a small smile. Bobby sighed and nodded, hopping out of his chair.

"…Okay." The boy muttered as he left the dining room. Lincoln watched his son leave before getting to his feet and taking the remaining dishes into the kitchen. Ronnie stood at the sink, washing up at a noticeably slower pace than usual; even she, it seemed, was being affected by the tense atmosphere.

"Thank you." She said as Lincoln set down the dishes, a smirk crossing her face as he leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Some day this is going to be, huh? Don't remember the last time I was  _glad_ to have work."

"Yeah… it's going to be a tough one, but Loan's strong. She'll be fine."

"It's not just Loan I'm worried about, you know…" Ronnie said quietly. She stopped her cleaning for a moment to look at her husband, her eyes laden with concern. "Are  _you_  alright?" Lincoln frowned deeply. He had barely spoken to Lori at all the past several weeks, and while Dr. Patel may have helped ease his turmoil somewhat he was still a bit apprehensive about seeing her again… not to mention saying  _goodbye_  just as he had reconnected with her.

Somehow, the fact that bothered him only served to bother him further.

"…I'm okay." Lincoln assured her. "I will be, anyway."

 

* * *

 

Loan flipped open her 5DS and stared at the screen for a moment before shutting it with a sigh. It would still be a few hours before her mother arrived, but despite the abundance of distractions available to her she had little desire to do any of them. Her mind was a tangled mess of conflicting emotions, and it seemed there was little she could do but dwell on them.

Almost without thinking, she got to her feet and left the room. She headed downstairs just as Ronnie came out from the dining room, having finished cleaning the dishes.

"Hey there, girl. Need something?" Ronnie asked.

"No, um… no. I'm just… I don't know." Loan mumbled. Her stepmother frowned and put a hand on her shoulder, squeezing lightly. She wished that she could do more to help the girl, but she knew fully well that she wasn't the right person to do so.

"You know… you should really go talk to Lincoln." Ronnie offered, gesturing towards the back door with her head. Loan looked over to see that he was sitting out on the patio. "…I think you both need each other right now." Loan felt a twinge of guilt in her heart; she had been so wrapped up in her own feelings that she hadn't even considered how her father may be taking all of this.

"I… you're right." Loan said. "I'll talk to him. Thanks, Ronnie…" Ronnie smirked and gave a small nod, patting the girl's back before walking off. Loan watched her go, and then approached the glass back door; her father turned at the sound of the door sliding open, his eyebrows rising in surprise.

"Oh… hey, Loan." He said, a gentle smile crossing his face. "How's it going?"

"Um… fine…" Loan lied, forcing the best grin she could muster at the moment. She sat down on the lawn chair beside his. It dawned on her that, despite living here for nearly a month, she'd never once set foot in the backyard. Granted, she rarely set foot outside at all, but still… it was her home, now.

"Nice day, isn't it?" Lincoln said, more of a statement than a question. Loan silently nodded; even she knew meaningless small talk when she heard it. Her father's words were little more than an attempt to break the silence… no doubt he was unsure what exactly he should say to ease the girl's mind.

"Dad… are you okay?" She asked quietly. Lincoln frowned, running his tongue along his teeth; as much as he wanted to pretend that he was fine, he couldn't. Instead, he simply took a deep breath and laid his head back against the chair.

"…I don't know, honestly." He admitted. "It's all a bit… complicated, I guess." Loan chewed her lip and nodded in understanding. "How about you?" Lincoln asked.

"The same, I guess…" Loan muttered. "I-I don't really know how I should feel. It's like… I'm still mad at her, you know? But… I don't want her to go. Even with everything that happened… the things she  _did…_ I still love her."

"Yeah…" Lincoln absent-mindedly scratched at his cheek. "Loan, do you think your mom is a bad person?" Loan thought for a moment before shaking her head.

"No, I don't… b-but that doesn't excuse anything."

"It's the same for me," Her father said. "She's  _not_ a bad person… at least, I don't think so. Even now, I still remember her as she  _was._ "

"What was she like back then…?" Loan asked, turningher head to look at him. Lincoln pursed his lips in thought.

"…Kind of a bitch, honestly." He said. Loan couldn't help but snort at the bluntness of the statement, and he let out a small chuckle himself. "She could be bossy, and petty, and even outright mean at times. We had our disagreements, and lord knows we fought a lot… but we were still close. More than anything, I remember the good times we had. Even more than… you know." Lincoln sighed. "Like I said, it's complicated." Loan frowned and opened her mouth to speak, only for the door to slide open; it was Bobby, dressed for school and with his backpack slung loosely over his shoulders. "Oh… hey, Bobby." Lincoln said with a grin. "You heading out?"

"…Yeah." He muttered as he walked over. "I'm going now." Lincoln smirked and gave his son a hug. The boy turned towards his sister, eying her up and down for a moment. She looked tired… even more so than usual. He couldn't help but be concerned.

"Bobby?" Loan tilted her head slightly in confusion. "Something wrong?" Bobby frowned and shook his head.

"…No. Um… I'll see you later. A-after school… okay?" He said softly, as though it didn't go without saying. Perhaps he was trying to reassure her that he'd be there for her.

"Yeah… see you later. Have a good time at school." Loan said with a sweet smile, which Bobby returned with a tiny smirk of his own. As much as Loan wanted to go for a hug herself, she didn't feel that their relationship had reached that point yet. Instead, she settled for a small wave. With that, Bobby walked off, being sure to close the door behind him.

"He really likes you, you know." Said her father. "I haven't seen him talk to someone so easily in a long time. Well… easily by  _his_ standards, at least…" The fact that  _that_ was considered speaking easily was a bit troubling to the girl… even now, he still stammered and mumbled when speaking with her, sometimes to the point she had difficulty understanding what exactly he was trying to say.

"Um… you said it took a long time for him to start talking, right…?" Loan asked. Lincoln sighed, giving a small nod.

"Yeah. Looking back, I'm pretty sure he  _could_ talk long before he started, but just didn't want to. Like… even around  _us_ he was too shy to say much." Lincoln's frown turned to a smile as he chuckled under his breath. "I still remember the day he started speaking. Hell, I don't think  _anyone_ would've been able to forget it."

"Oh?"

"We were watching Star Wars," Lincoln explained. "Well…  _I_ was watching it. I guess something about it just kind of… drew his interest, and he sat down and watched with me. Like I said, he was five, but I figured it was tame enough for him. Besides, I'd never seen him so enraptured by something." Loan perked up a bit, clearly interested in the story. "We finished 'A New Hope', and he looked so disappointed that it was over that I couldn't help but keep going. So I put on  _Empire,_ and again, he's fascinated by it. Hell, even  _I_ thought it was boring as a kid, but he couldn't take his eyes off it. And then we reached the climax, and…" Lincoln bit his lip, trying his best to hold back a laugh.

"What? What happened?" Loan asked, leaning forward slightly.

"S-sorry. So, we get to the 'I am your father' scene and, swear to God… this silent little kid just jumps to his feet and shouts  _'What the fuck?!'_ as loud as he can." Loan clasped a hand over her mouth, one again letting out a snort of laughter.

"N-No way."

"Swear on my life," Lincoln assured her. "I guess we'd gotten used to swearing around him… we didn't really think he was taking it in, you know? I was too shocked to scold him about it. Hell, I was more  _relieved_ than anything else. And he kept going, too… just, like,  _ranting_ about the movie.  _Analyzing_ it. Using all these big words, just going on and on. To this day, I've never seen him get that excited about anything. And after that, well, he was pretty much the Bobby you know now."

"Wow…" Loan muttered. "That's really something. I've never really seen him get worked up like that… he always seems so calm."

"Bobby can get… passionate about things." Her father explained. "A little  _too_ passionate, honestly. Say that Kirk is better than Picard, and… actually, y'know what, don't do that." He sighed, scratching the back of his head. "…That was one hell of an Easter, that's for sure." Loan giggled into her palm; quite frankly, she had a hard time picturing her little brother getting legitimately angry. In any case, the story had lightened the tense atmosphere considerably. She sat back against the chair, looking out upon the backyard.

 _It IS a pretty nice day,_  Loan thought.

 

* * *

 

"So where you headed to, miss?" Said the middle-aged man in the driver's seat. Lori looked up from her phone.

" _Hazeltucky._ " She said with a note of irritation in her voice. "I told you."

"M-my apologies, m'aam." The man stammered. "I meant where you're traveling. If that's not too personal, of course." Lori groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose; of  _course_ he knew where they were going. He'd been driving them there for the past hour.

"…I'm sorry. I… haven't had much sleep." She said with a sigh. "Um… I'm headed to Japan."

"No worries. Japan, eh? I've been there myself… lovely country." The man said. "Business?"

"Yes and no. I'm moving there, actually… transferring." Now that the day had come, Lori couldn't help but feel anxious about the change. She'd only ever left the country a few times in her life… to move to Japan, where few even spoke English, was an almost absurd notion. In retrospect, she never should have expected Loan to accept it, and in fact pushing such a change upon her was what had driven her away in the first place. Still, as hard as it was to accept, she knew her daughter was happier now. That, at least, provided her some solace.

But not much.

"Um, I'm sorry, but I'm not really in the mood to talk."

"I understand. Let me know if you need anything, miss." The man fell silent, leaving Lori alone with her thoughts.

 

* * *

 

After what felt like both too long and too short of a time, they arrived. Lori felt far more apprehensive than she expected to; would Loan forgive her? Would she even  _talk_ to her?

"Thank you," She said to the driver. "It may be a while, so…"

"No worries," The driver replied with a polite smile. "Take as long as you need. I'll be here." Lori nodded and opened the door stepping out into the brisk Autumn air. The tightness in her chest only grew as she approached the front door… what would  _Lincoln_ say? The last time she'd seen him he'd been frightened of her, not that she could blame him. She'd done a horrible thing to him, and now she was paying the price. Not the price she  _deserved,_ but a price nonetheless.

Lori paused in front of the door, shutting her eyes and taking a deep breath before exhaling. This was it… no point in hesitating further. She reached out and rang the doorbell.

Lincoln and his daughter had been awaiting Lori's arrival in the living room for the past hour. Ronnie had already left for work, a bit early in fact… not wanting any chance of seeing 'that puta' face-to-face again. She'd been sure to give her husband a bigger hug than usual before departing. Even Loan had gotten a quick hug and an assurance that everything would be okay, a gesture that the girl had seemed to appreciate. But now, there was little more than the rapid clicking of Loan's fidget cube to break the silence; normally, Lincoln would find this annoying. In fact, he  _did_ find it annoying, but he couldn't bring himself to ask her to stop. Besides, he had been tapping his finger against his knee in time with the clicking, which at least gave him something to focus on. So great was the silence that the doorbell was enough to make them both jump. They exchanged a glance.

"I, uh… I guess this is it." Lincoln said, only receiving a nod in response. Lincoln hesitated a moment, chewing his lip as he looked towards the front door. Finally, he got to his feet with a small grunt and walked to the door. He opened it to see, as expected, his oldest sister standing before him.

"…Lincoln." Lori said quietly, barely able to bring herself to look at the man.

"Lori." Her brother replied. "You look tired." He added, taking note of the bags under the woman's eyes. She looked away, letting out a small chuckle.

"So do you," She muttered, earning her a smirk from Lincoln.

"Um… come on in." He stood aside, allowing Lori to enter; she gave a nod of thanks before heading inside. She tensed up upon seeing her daughter, who wasn't even looking in her direction.

"Hello, Loan." Lori said in a soft tone.

"…Hey, mom." Loan kept her gaze trained somewhere off to the side, unable to bring herself to look her mother in the eye. She had stopped clicking her fidget cube, instead clutching it so tightly that her knuckles turned white. She wasn't sure why she was so on edge… she knew fully well that she shouldn't be. Her mother wasn't going to hurt her, nor was she going to hurt her father. She had never  _intended_  to in the first place.

But it didn't change the fact that she  _had._

"So…" Lori began, sitting down at the far end of the l-shaped couch. "I… hear you've been doing well here." Loan gave a small nod. "That's good… I'm glad." Lori folded her hands in her lap, averting her eyes as well; neither was sure exactly what to say. She looked to her brother for assistance, but quite frankly he wasn't quite sure what to say either. Nonetheless, he sat down beside his daughter and cleared his throat.

"So, Lori… are you ready?" He asked. "I mean… Japan. Like…  _wow,_  you know?" Lori looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

"…Yes, I suppose 'like, wow' is one way to put it." Lori said. "It's a big change, to be sure… I have to admit, now that the time has come, I'm not sure if I  _am_ ready. Though… I suppose it's far too late for second thoughts."

"Have you told the others?"

"Only Mom and Dad. And Luna knows, of course." Lori said. "I thought about contacting the others, but… that's one hell of a call to make, you know? 'Hey sis, I know it's been years since we talked but I'm moving to Japan'. Especially Leni… I doubt she'd take it too well. It's for the best that I just… go, I think." Lincoln frowned.

"…You really think that's for the  _best,_ Lori?" He asked; Lori looked away, her brow furrowing slightly.

"I don't know," She admitted. "I really don't know. But… I literally can't bring myself to talk to them now. Maybe that's selfish. Honestly, it probably  _is._ But I just can't." She noticed Loan's eyes narrow, even if she wasn't looking in her direction… no doubt the girl would have had some choice words for her, had she been bold enough to speak them.

Another awkward silence fell over the room. Again, none were sure what they should be saying… it was as though there were too much that needed to be said, and yet so much that had been said already. But again, it was Lincoln who broke the silence.

"Okay, look…" Lincoln muttered, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "I'm sure we all have a lot to get off our chests. So… there's really no sense in dancing around things." Lori paused a moment, folding her hands in her lap as she considered her next words; finally, she let out a sigh and hung her head.

"I… I don't think I can say any more than I have. I could apologize, but no matter how many times I say it, it would never be enough. I could beg for forgiveness, but the truth is I don't deserve it, nor do I expect it."

"Lori-"

"I've hurt you both. I've  _failed_ you both, time and time again… as a mother, as a sister, as… as a  _person._ And I just… I keep doing it." Lori looked to her daughter, who was hugging her knees to her chest with a troubled expression. "Loan, sweetie… I've made so many mistakes. I've done terrible things to you, and through my negligence I enabled something even worse. I know that I'll never be able to make up for that. But… I want you to know that I do love you, more than anything. I always did, even back when… when I  _drank._  You've been the one good thing to come out of all of this, and I've come to realize just how much I took you for granted."

Lori paused, awaiting some kind of response from the girl… but received none. Loan did little more but shift in place, hugging her legs even tighter. The girl jumped slightly as she felt a hand on her shoulder; it was her father's, of course. His gentle eyes met hers.

"Loan… do you have anything you want to say?" He gently asked.

_**Go on. Beg mommy to take you back. You know that's what you want.** _

Loan shut her eyes, taking a moment to force the thought out of her mind. That wasn't what she wanted… she knew it wasn't.

_**Lie all you want, Loan. Deep down, you know I'm right.** _

Loan opened her eyes, briefly flicking her gaze towards her mother before looking to her father. She swallowed and gave a small nod.

"Um… c-can I talk to mom alone for a bit…?"

 

* * *

 

Bobby sat before his monitor in the school's computer lab, bored out of his mind; while most other students saw this as a welcome reprieve from their usual classwork, for Bobby it was just redundant. The 'edutainment' games proved to be neither entertaining nor particularly educational to the boy, while the critical thinking exercises also failed to challenge him in any meaningful capacity. In fact, he had already finished his assignment and now had little to do but simply sit there in silence. As much as he would like to get back to reading his book, he knew that doing so would simply result in a scolding from Mrs. Heathers.

Of course, there was more than simple boredom preoccupying the boy's mind. Today Loan would be saying goodbye to her mother, no doubt the mysterious woman he'd glimpsed the night she had arrived. He still had so many unanswered questions about the woman, not to mention about Loan herself… questions that had been mostly dodged by his father, and in fact he himself had nearly forgotten over the past few weeks. But now, those questions were at the forefront of his mind: who was she? Why, beyond her resemblance to Loan, did she seem so  _familiar?_ And, perhaps biggest of all… how could his sister be mistaken for a  _cousin?_

Bobby leaned forward and pretended to be hard at work as Mrs. Heathers passed by, only to lean back again once she was gone. He discretely opened a new tab and typed 'what does it mean when my cousin is also my sister' into the search bar, crossing his fingers and hoping that this wouldn't trigger any sort of content blocker. Thankfully, it did not, and he quickly found several promising results… mostly similar questions asked by others on various sites. Bobby took a quick glance in both directions to make sure that his teacher wasn't nearby, then clicked the first one that caught his eye: 'can my half-brother be my cousin?'. Granted, she was his half- _sister,_ but he doubted that would make much of a difference.

From what he could gather, such a thing  _was_ possible if one father were to have a child with two sisters, or vice-versa. The problem there was that his mother  _had_ no sister, and his father had no brother… and besides, he already knew that she was Lincoln's daughter. Loan shared some pretty clear traits with others in his father's side of the family, after all.

…Meaning that her mother did as well.

Bobby's brow knitted in confusion. Even though he hadn't had a very close look, he remembered that sense of familiarity he had gotten from her… as if he had seen her somewhere before. But as much as he racked his brain, he couldn't place it. He  _knew_ all his relatives… all of his aunts, uncles, and cousins on both sides of the family.

Except  _one._

He was vaguely aware that his father had one sister he had never met. He had noticed her in old family photos before, and heard her mentioned in passing: 'Laurie', if his memory served him right. Whenever he asked about her, he'd simply been told that she didn't talk to them anymore. But why? He tried to recall what the girl had looked like… fair skin, blonde hair and blue eyes… all common traits in the family. Loan had them too, and even the shape of her hair was similar… in fact, it was  _so_ similar that, were she to actually care for it, it may very well look identical.

The more the pieces fell into place, the more questions he had, and the deeper he researched the matter the more his stomach twisted into knots. By the time the bell rang, he was even more confused than when he had started. There was no doubt in his mind that this 'Laurie' was Loan's mother… and he didn't doubt that they shared a father, either.

Needless to say, something didn't quite add up here.

 

* * *

 

Somehow, Lincoln's absence only served to amplify the tense atmosphere. Neither Lori nor her daughter could bring themselves to look at one another, nor did either one speak for quite some time. It was as though there were a crushing pressure tightening around Lori's heart, and she couldn't help but wonder if this was how Loan felt during her attacks. For her part, despite having asked to talk one-on-one in the first place, Loan wasn't even sure where she should begin.

_**Run into mommy's arms. Beg her to take you with her. She'll keep you safe.** _

"Loan?" Thankfully, Lori was the first to speak; she was anxiously wringing her hands in her lap as she searched for the right words. "I've… done a lot of thinking, since you left." She said. "It's been so much quieter… so much  _emptier_ without you in my life. And… I don't know…" She sighed and shook her head sadly. "I'm glad that you're happy here. I really am. But… it hurts a little, too. Knowing that Lincoln has been a better parent to you in a few weeks than I have in twenty-one years… it just goes to show how badly I've failed you as a mother."

"…Don't say that." Loan muttered. "You haven't-"

"I have." Lori interjected. "I've failed you, time and time again. I've  _hurt_ you literally more times than I can count. Lincoln… he'll never do that. I  _know_ he won't. And if I'd… if I'd told him the truth  _earlier..._ you could have been spared so much pain."

_**He'll hurt you sooner or later. Just like everyone else.** _

Loan's gaze focused on her mother. The woman looked utterly defeated, her proud and dignified façade stripped away; this was the true Lori Loud. Not an upper-class socialite, nor a snobbish professional businesswoman. She was simply a woman haunted by her mistakes, forcing herself to put on airs to hide the pain she truly felt inside. Loan frowned as her conflicted emotions once again rose to the surface.

"…I remember it all, you know." Loan turned away from her mother to stare aimlessly at the floor. "All of it. Every time you screamed at me, every time you  _hit_ me… every bruise, every slap, every cigarette burn. I-I remember it all…" With each accusation, the vice around Lori's heart only grew tighter and tighter. It was all true, of course… at the height of her alcoholism, she had been an absolute _monster._

"Loan, I-"

" _But,_ " Loan cut in. "Do you… do you know what I remember above everything else? Every time you were there for me. E-every time you  _held_  me when I woke up screaming… every time you called in sick just to make sure I was okay.  _That's_ what… what I remember..." She bit her lip and tried to force back her tears; she couldn't break down now. Not when she'd finally mustered up the nerve to speak her mind. "I-I don't think you're a bad mom, and I don't think you're a bad  _person._ But… it doesn't change the things you did. You  _did_ hurt me, and you hurt  _dad_ too."

"I never-"

"You never meant to, I know." Loan said. She forced herself to look her mother in the eye, seeing that she was faring no better... in fact, her makeup was already starting to run as tears streamed down her face. It hurt to see her mother like this, but she had to let this out… it was the only chance she had to do so. "You never meant to, b-but you still did them. And I'm…. I'm not ready to forgive that. I don't know if ever  _will_ be. At least… not entirely." Lori nodded in understanding.

"I, um… I didn't come expecting forgiveness, Loan. Not from you, and not from your father." She said. "I just… I needed to see you again. I needed to say  _goodbye."_  Loan tensed up at her words, clutching her sleeve tightly. 'Goodbye'. Despite her conflicted feelings towards her mother, it was something she still wasn't ready to hear.

_**Stop fighting this, Loan. You want to be with your mother… you want to be coddled like the child you are.** _

"Sweetie, I… um…" Lori sniffed and got a tissue from her purse, using it to dab at her running eyeliner. "I just need to know one thing. Are you… sure this is what you want? A-are you sure you're going to be happy with this…?" Loan wasn't sure why she was hesitant to answer… she knew that she'd made the right choice.

_**Japan, America, what does it matter? You never leave your fucking room. Whether you waste away here or there, it makes no difference.** _

"…I am." Loan said quietly. "It's… it's an adjustment. I'm  _still_ adjusting, even now. But… it's home. I have a dad, now… I have a great little brother. He's… he's so sweet. You'd like him." She added with a smile.

_**You're intruding on their lives.** _

"And Ronnie's great, too… she's been so nice to me."

_**Her patience will run out.** _

"S-so… I don't regret my choice. I'm happy here, and I… I want to stay. Even if that means I have to…"

_**Stop this. Stop lying to yourself. Run to mommy. Do it NOW.** _

"I-I have to…"

_**Listen to me, Loan.** _

"I…"

_**Listen. To. Me.** _

Loan felt a familiar tightness in her chest, and her eyes went wide;  _no,_ she thought.  _Not now._ She shut her eyes and began breathing rapidly. Despite her best efforts to keep it together, Lori immediately noticed the change.

"Loan…?" Lori got to her feet, her voice laced with concern for her daughter. "Loan, sweetie, are you okay?"

_**LISTEN TO ME!** _

Lori rushed to her daughter's side, but Loan held up a hand to stop her. She took a deep breath through her nose, then exhaled. She was fine. She could handle this… it was minor. She was  _used_  to this. And no matter what that little voice in the back of her mind said, she didn't need her mother to take care of her. Not anymore.

"…I-I have to let you go." Loan muttered.

 

* * *

 

Lincoln sighed and set down his stylus before leaning back in his chair. He had been trying to get a bit of work done while Loan and Lori said their goodbyes, but he couldn't stay focused on it. A part of him wished he had insisted to stay by his daughter's side, but he knew that would be overbearing of him… if Loan wanted to speak to her mother on her own, who was he to stop her? Luckily, he wouldn't have to wait long; his phone soon vibrated, letting out the  _ding_  of a received message. He checked it to find that it was from Lori: 'We're finished', it said. Lincoln got to his feet with a grunt.

He walked downstairs to find the two women standing together near the door; Lori was saying something to her daughter, who simply gave a small nod in response. They looked up as he arrived, and Lincoln could see just how badly this was affecting them both… they looked as though they could break down crying at any moment. Hell, Loan looked nearly as bad as she had the night she'd arrived.

"…Hey. You guys, uh… done?" He asked. Lori nodded while her daughter remained silent, her eyes downcast.

"Yes… we've said all that can be said, I think." Lori said. "And I should be going, anyway… I'd rather get to the airport early, just to be safe." It seemed a little  _too_ early, if anything: it was only three o' clock, and her flight wasn't until seven. Still, he could hardly blame her… the tension in the air was so thick it could be cut with a knife.

"Alright, then." Lincoln felt that he should say more than that, but he wasn't sure exactly  _what._ Lori turned back to her daughter, wringing her purse strap anxiously.

"…I guess this is it, then." She said quietly, getting nothing more than a small nod in response from Loan. Lori reached out to hug her daughter, but the girl backed away and shook her head; that simple refusal was all it took to break what little resolve she had left. For a moment she was frozen in place with her arms outstretched, trembling as tears started to flow freely down her cheeks. Loan swallowed and forced back her own tears.

_**Why, Loan?** _

Though a big part of her wanted to jump into her mother's embrace, she couldn't… not yet. She wasn't ready for that, knowing what those hands had done.

_**She loves you.** _

She'd loved Lincoln, too.

_**She was drunk.** _

It wasn't an excuse.

_**She'll keep you safe.** _

So would her father.

_**He'll hurt you too.** _

Her mother already had.

_**She's going to leave you.** _

Loan knew.

She loosely crossed her arms and leaned against the wall, her eyes downcast; there was no animosity in her expression. No hatred, no anger… there was only sadness. But she wouldn't cry. For once, she would be strong.

Lori choked back a sob and clasped a hand over her mouth. She'd told herself that she would be prepared for this, but she wasn't… hell, it was foolish of her to assume she  _would_ be. Her daughter wouldn't even  _touch_ her, and she could hardly blame her. Lincoln felt a twinge of pain in his heart as he watched his older sister struggle to regain her composure.

"Lori-"

"I-it's fine…" Lori assured him. She wiped her tears away and forced a small, unconvincing smile. "It's fine. These things… take time." She looked to her daughter once more. "Well, Loan… I… I guess this is goodbye."

"…Yeah."

_**Don't go.** _

"Goodbye, then. F-for now, at least… I'll see you when I see you."

"Okay."

_**Please, don't go.** _

Lori chewed her lip,glancing away from her daughter for a brief moment.

"I love you," She said quietly. Loan's brow furrowed and she clutched her sleeve tightly.

"I…"

_**I love you too.** _

"…know."

Lori wasn't particularly surprised by her response, not that it made it hurt any less. She took a deep breath and nodded in understanding.

"I'll, uh… I'll walk you out." Lincoln offered.

"…Thank you, Lincoln." Lori said; in truth, she was more grateful for the offer than she could possibly express.

_**Please don't leave me.** _

As Lincoln walked her out, Lori took one final glance over her shoulder at her daughter. The girl's head was tilted downwards, her hair blocking any view of her face. Lori sighed and looked away just as her brother shut the door.

"I'm sure she'll come around, Lori." Lincoln said in a gentle tone. Lori sniffled and wiped at her eyes again. She knew she would, of course… just as she knew Loan still loved her.

Still, it would have been nice to hear.

"…Like I said, these things take time." Lori took another deep breath to calm herself, then turned to face her brother. "Has she… been well?"

"Yeah," Lincoln said. "She's been… enjoying it here, I think. And she gets along great with Bobby… you'd think they'd known each other for years." He added with a small chuckle, to which Lori couldn't help but smirk.

"She always  _did_ want a little brother or sister." She said.

"She's been great, really." Lincoln assured her. "And… I'm glad she's here."

"…I'm glad too." Lori said in barely above a whisper. There was an uncomfortable silence between the two siblings; both shifted awkwardly, finding it difficult to look each other in the eye. Finally, Lori cleared her throat and stood up straight, doing her best to put up her dignified façade once more. "Well then, Lincoln… I guess this is goodbye." She extended her hand for a shake, as though this were some sort of business arrangement; but, to her surprise, Lincoln reached out and pulled her into a hug. For a moment, she was simply frozen in shock. Then, she tearfully returned her brother's embrace. For some time they remained like that in silence, Lincoln ignoring the spreading wet spot on his shirt from Lori's tears.

"Lori, listen…" He began as he gently pulled away from the hug. "I can't forgive or forget what you did to me… and I don't know if I ever  _can_. But that doesn't mean I don't want a relationship with you. Promise me you won't be a stranger… promise you'll  _call_ , at least." Lori sniffed and rubbed at her eyes, giving him a nod of agreement.

"…I-I will." She said. The two siblings shared a smile before Lori cleared her throat. "Well, Lincoln… take care of yourself. And… promise me you'll take good care of my baby girl."

"I will." He said. Lori gave him another quick hug before walking to her limo; the driver was already standing beside the door of course, and opened it for her as she approached.

"Thank you," She said, and he tipped his hat before heading back to the driver's seat. Lori rolled down her window.

"Lemme know how Japan is, okay?" Lincoln said with a smirk. "I'd really like to go there some day. And y'know, if it isn't  _too_  much trouble…"

"Yes, yes… I'll send you nerdy anime crap." Lori groaned, rolling her eyes as her younger brother pumped his fist in triumph. "I'll be seeing you, Lincoln."

"Yeah. And, Lori… you take care of yourself too, okay?" He said.

"…I'll try." Lori said with a chuckle before rolling up the window. Lincoln watched as the car drove off and down the street, not moving from his spot until she was out of sight; then, he finally let out a long sigh, the smirk quickly fading from his face. It felt odd to be saying goodbye just as his sister had re-entered his life, but at least this time he knew it wasn't for good. Despite everything, he still wanted her in his life. Lincoln skulked back up the driveway and opened the front door to find that Loan was still exactly where they had left her. She looked up as her father entered, the despair evident in her blue eyes.

"H-hey, dad." She muttered. "Is, um… is she gone…?" Lincoln nodded, and Loan looked downcast once more. Lincoln walked over to the girl, placing his hand on her shoulder.

"Loan…" Before he could finish, Loan gently pulled away.

"Sorry, dad… I think I just want to go to my room for a while. I-if that's alright."

"…I understand. Just let me know if you need anything, okay?" The two exchanged a small smile before Loan turned and made her way up the stairs, counting each step as she walked.

 

* * *

 

"Is everything alright, miss?" The chauffer asked, taking note of his passenger's sullen demeanor.

"…Yes. Just… saying goodbye is difficult." Lori said.

"I understand." The man said, wisely choosing not to press further. Lori sighed and absentmindedly looked out the window as they drove through the streets of Hazeltucky; it seemed that school had just gotten out for the day, and as such traffic was considerably slow. Then, she spotted something, or rather some _one_  familiar in the distance.

"Um… excuse me, but can you pull over?"

"Miss?"

"Just for a moment," She said, and the driver did as he was asked, pulling up along the sidewalk. Lori got out of the car just as a small boy on a bicycle was about to pass by. "E-excuse me! Bobby!" The boy screeched to a halt, turning to see who had called his name… only to find that, to his shock, it was the very woman who had been occupying his thoughts for the better part of the day. "Excuse me… you're Bobby, right?" She asked with a gentle smile.

"…Y-yes…" Bobby mumbled. The little boy hopped off his bike and turned to face her, shrinking back slightly as Lori squatted down to eye level... or as much as she could manage, anyway. Bobby was anything but a tall boy.

"Hello, Bobby. Do you… know who I am?" Lori asked softly. Bobby swallowed and gave a small nod.

"…You're Loan's mom, right…?"

"Yes, I am." Lori said. "My name's-"

"Laurie." Lori blinked, surprised by his quick response… she hadn't expected him to know her name.

"Um… I'm Lori, yes." She said. Bobby looked away, his brow furrowing in shock; she'd confirmed his suspicions, but he was only more confused than ever. "A-are you alright?" Lori asked.

"…You're Lori… m-my aunt."

"Yes, I'm-"

"You're… dad's sister…" Bobby muttered as the pieces started to fall into place. He looked back up at her with wide, troubled eyes. "…B-but you're… Loan's mom. So… is Loan my sister, or my cousin…?"

"I…" Lori gasped as she realized what he was saying.

"I-i-is she both?!" Bobby sputtered. Lori simply stared at the boy with her mouth agape, not that she  _needed_  to answer… her silence spoke volumes. "That's… not s-supposed to happen..."

"No…" Lori agreed, shaking her head sadly. "…It's not." Bobby stared at her in silence. He was smart for his age, but he was still a little boy… and there was a lot here that he didn't fully understand. But what he  _did_  understand was that whatever had happened to Loan, whatever had happened to his  _parents_ … this woman was the root of all of it. Bobby huffed and turned away, walking off with his bike in tow. "Bobby? W-wait…!"

"…Stay away from us." Bobby grumbled, hopping back on his bike and pedaling off. He didn't look back even once… he just wanted to be as far away from his aunt as possible. Bobby may not have known her, and in all honesty she'd seemed nice… but he didn't like her.

He pedaled home as fast as his legs would allow, tearing up the driveway so quickly that he was barely able to screech to a halt before crashing into the garage door. He punched in the code only for the door to, once again, get stuck halfway open. Bobby sighed and ducked under, dragging his bike behind him. He propped it up in its spot and headed inside, this time not even bothering to try and close the garage door.

Bobby found his father sitting on the couch, watching a golf tournament… a sure sign that he wasn't really 'watching' so much as desperately needing something else to focus on, as evidenced by the fact that the mere sound of the laundry room door closing was enough to catch his attention.

"Oh… hey, buddy." Lincoln greeted his son with a smile. "How was school?"

"…Fine." Bobby mumbled, shuffling his way over. He frowned as he looked up at his father; even Bobby knew stress when he saw it. "Are you okay…?"

"Yeah, it's, uh… it's just been an emotional day." Lincoln said with a sigh. "Goodbyes are always difficult, you know…?"

"…I guess." The boy mumbled. As much as he wanted to question his father about his earlier discovery, something told him that both his father and Loan had had a rough enough time as is. There would be time for that later. "I… I'm gonna go do my homework, so…"

"Oh…Bobby." Lincoln said in a soft tone. "Listen… you should probably give Loan some space tonight. She's, you know… she's had a day."

"Is she alright…?" Bobby asked.

"She will be." Lincoln assured him. "Alright, go on. Maybe we'll watch something later, what do you say?"

"…Sure." Bobby said with a smirk. His father ruffled his hair and he walked off, heading up the stairs to his room. Loan's door was shut and there was no sound coming from within; usually, he would be able to hear some sort of game or anime from inside, but not tonight. He couldn't help but feel concerned, but he decided to do as he was told and give her space.

Bobby pulled off his hoodie and laid it on his bed before stepping out of his shoes and neatly setting them aside. He opened his backpack, fished out his homework, and sat down at his desk to get to work.

Or…  _try_  to, at any rate. He'd only finished about half the worksheet before he stopped, leaning away from the desk with a sigh. He'd gotten so used to Loan's presence over the past few weeks that the silence was almost deafening. Beyond that, he was worried about her… his father had clearly been rattled by the day's events, and he had no doubt that his sister was faring worse. Bobby chewed his lip in hesitation for a moment, then slid out of his chair.

Loan couldn't sleep. Not that she was really  _trying_ to… she wasn't trying to do much of  _anything,_ in fact. Her fidget cube lay beside her, unused… even that was too much effort for her right now.

Loan shut her eyes tightly as someone gently knocked on her door. She didn't want to talk to anyone right now.

"Loan…? It's me…"

Well… she supposed she could make  _one_  exception.

"C-come in…" Loan said as she sat upright. The door opened and Bobby shuffled in; Loan couldn't help but smile as she saw him, half-hearted though it may be. "Hey, Bobby… um, h-how was school?"

"…It was fine." He said quietly. He approached her side of the bed, looking up at his sister with a concerned expression. "How are  _you,_ though…?"

"I'm… okay. You don't need to worry about me." Loan assured him, but he wasn't convinced… he could hear her voice wavering as she spoke.

"I am, though." Bobby said, climbing up onto the bed and sitting down beside her. "You look sad." Loan sniffed and averted her eyes. Bobby took a moment to look over the girl… maybe she  _was_  both his sister and his cousin, but it didn't matter to him.

"I, um…" Loan muttered. "I… said goodbye to my mom today."

"…I know." Bobby said. Loan chewed her lip and wrung her hands in her lap.

"S-she wasn't perfect… a-and I 'm still mad at her about a lot of things." Loan explained. "But I… I don't want her to go…" Her little brother frowned as she choked back a sob; he scooted a bit closer and reached out to pat her back, only to suddenly find himself swept into a tight hug. Bobby yelped and fell back onto the bed, his sister burying her face into his chest and beginning to cry loudly. Well, more 'inelegant blubbering' than crying, as she released all of the emotions she'd been forcing back all day. It was as though he were a pillow or a big teddy bear rather than a young boy. "I-I want my mom…!" She whimpered.

"Um… i-it's okay." He said softly; he gently patted the back of her head. He cringed slightly at the damp sensation on his chest, and hoped that her tears weren't messing up his favorite  _Doctor Who_ t-shirt… then again, he supposed he didn't really care  _that_  much. She clearly needed to get all this out, so he simply rubbed the back of her head until she began to calm down. "Are you… okay, Loan?" He asked, once her sobs had petered out into the occasional sniffle or hiccup.

No response.

"Loan…?" Bobby tilted his head to find that her eyes were shut… the girl had fallen asleep on his chest. He frowned and squirmed slightly, trying to wriggle out of his big sister's grasp; Loan simply hugged him tighter, grumbling something unclear in her sleep. Bobby sighed in defeat and laid his head back against the bed. It didn't seem like he was going anywhere for a while, but he wasn't about to wake the girl. Besides, it wasn't like he was uncomfortable… and if this was the best he could do to comfort her, so be it.

 _Besides…_  he thought as he shut his eyes.  _I guess I could use a nap too._


	9. Girl Problems

"Ow, ouch, damn it…" Lori grumbled under her breath with each step as she made her way through the crowded halls of Tokyo International Airport, rolling her carry-on bag behind her. She regretted opting to wear heels for the trip, though she supposed she should always try to look her best. She was tired, too; not even the comforts of first class had been able to ease her mind enough to sleep for more than a few hours.

Lori followed the signs to the baggage claim. As expected, there were many people, drivers, family members and the like, holding signs bearing the names of disembarking travelers. For once, Lori was thankful for her unusual surname; it didn't take long to spot a well-dressed Japanese man with a placard reading 'Loud'.

"Ms. Lori Loud?" The man asked as she approached.

"Yes, that's me." She said. The man smiled and lowered his sign, extending his hand to the woman.

"Welcome to Japan, Loud-san." As she shook his hand, the man bowed his head respectfully; Lori wasn't quite sure if she was meant to do the same, and instead gave a small nod. "My name is Kim Tanaka… starting today I'll be your personal assistant."

 

* * *

 

_Ding_

Loan groaned and stirred slightly, reaching out from under the covers towards her nightstand. She fumbled around for her phone, only to accidentally knock it to the floor in the process. Growling in frustration, she scooted over to the edge of the bed and reached down to pick it up, finding that she received a message from her mother.

**) Hi sweety, just wanted to let you know I made it to japan safely. Hope your doing well, love u XOXO**

**k (**

Part of Loan wanted to reply 'I love you too'. Another part wanted to chew out her mom for texting her so early; however, a quick glance at the time revealed it to be nearly noon. Loan sighed, forcing herself to sit up at the edge of her bed. The previous day had been so emotionally draining that she'd done nothing butsleep, only waking to have a small snack or use the bathroom.

…Or to let go of Bobby. Apparently she'd kept the poor boy trapped in a bear hug for over an hour the previous night, and he just hadn't had it in his heart to wake her. She'd meant to give him a proper apology, but by this time both he and Ronnie would have left for the day. This also meant that she missed breakfast, of course, which only soured her mood even further. Also probably explained why her stomach was cramping up a bit.

Loan rubbed her bleary eyes and stretched before sliding out of bed. In the hallway she could hear faint music coming from her father's study; she could only assume that he was working. She stifled a yawn as she shuffled down the hall towards the bathroom, receiving a static shock from the doorknob as a result.

Well, at least now she was awake.

Loan grumbled under her breath and stepped into the bathroom. She didn't even bother checking her reflection; she was sure she looked like death warmed over.

_**When DON'T you?** _

"Shut up," Loan grunted as she slid down her sweatpants and boxers before sitting down to relieve herself… and then she noticed it. A dark red spot, right on the crotch of her boxers.

Blood.

"…Oh,  _no…_ "

 

* * *

 

Lincoln pursed his lips in thought as he looked over his work. He wasn't sure what, but something seemed  _off_.

Ah, of course. The penciler had forgotten One-Eyed Jack's mustache. Lincoln rolled his eyes and added it; correcting mistakes like these were all part of the job of course, but still… he expected better from someone working on a major comic series. Granted, he was far from perfect himself, but at least he never forgot a  _key aspect_ of a character's design. At least, he was pretty sure he hadn't.

"...Have I?" Before he could dwell on that any further, Lincoln heard a knock on his door. He sat upright. "Yes?" The door creaked open and Loan peeked into the room.

"H-hey, Dad…" Loan stammered, her face flushed a light pink. "Um… d-do you have a minute…?"

"Of course." Lincoln said with a warm smile. Loan nodded and meekly stepped into the room. Lincoln couldn't help but notice that she looked incredibly flustered, and was shuffling awkwardly in place.

"U-um… sorry to bother you…"

"It's fine… what's up, Loan?" Her father asked, leaning forward with a concerned look in his eyes. "Is something wrong?" Loan averted her eyes as she anxiously wrung her sleeve. "Loan-"

"Well, I…" Loan began, then stopped and chewed her lip in thought; finally, she let out a sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. "A-alright, um… I… I've started my, y'know…" She trailed off, hoping that he may be able to pick up on what she was trying to say, but he just looked confused. Loan cleared her throat. "I'm having my… uh… end-of-sentence thingy…"

"…What?"

"Y-y'know how girls… y'know… once a month…?" She stammered. Lincoln cocked an eyebrow.

"Once a… oh." Her father's brow furrowed as the wheels began to turn in his head. " _Oh._ You, ah… you're on your period." Loan hung her head, giving a small nod; her face was bright red, and Lincoln's cheeks were only a few shades lighter than that. He looked away and coughed into his palm. "Sssoooo…"

"R-right, well… I don't…  _have_ anything." Loan mumbled.

"I'm sure Ronnie wouldn't mind if you used one of her tampo-"

 _"No!"_ Loan snapped, making her father jump. The flustered girl groaned and bowed her head apologetically. "S-sorry, I mean, um… I-I can't. I don't like to use anything that, y'know… g-goes…  _in._ "

"…Oh." An uncomfortable silence fell over the pair. Lincoln couldn't help but grimace slightly. He supposed it only made sense, given the girl's past. "I'm sorry, I should have figured…"

"N-no, it's alright!" Loan assured him. "It's… silly, but-"

"No, it's… I understand." Lincoln sighed. "So… I guess we're going to the store, then."

"I-if it's not too much trouble…"

"It's no trouble at all," Lincoln said, letting out a small grunt as he got to his feet. "Besides, I need to pick up a few things myself. You go get dressed… I'll meet you downstairs, okay?"

"Oh, um… alright. Th-thanks, dad." Lincoln gave his daughter a supportive smile and patted her on the shoulder before passing her and heading out to the hallway. As he disappeared down the stairs, Loan finally let out the groan of embarrassment she had been holding in.  _That_ had easily been one of the most awkward conversations of her life. And yet, somehow, it still went better than expected.

_**Not like you could set the bar any lower.** _

Well, awkward or not, it was done. Soon she'd have her pads, and-

 _"_ … _I guess we're going to the store, then."_

 _Wait,_ Loan thought,  _we?_

_"You go get dressed… I'll meet you downstairs, okay?"_

Loan felt a pit forming in her stomach. We. He'd said  _we._ As in, both of them. As in, Loan would be going too. Outside. In a town she barely knew, to a store she'd never been to before. Why did she have to go? Surely she could just tell him what she needed, right?

_**Selfish bitch. He does so much for you, and you can't even be bothered to get off your ass for one hour of the fucking day.** _

"N-no… that's not it, I just…" Loan muttered, shaking her head. "I-I'll just ask if I can stay here. Dad would… no. Come  _on,_ Loan." She lightly knocked her fist against the side of her head. They were just going to the store, for crying out loud. She wanted to get better, didn't she? She wanted to at least  _try._ Sitting around all day wasn't  _trying._ It would be fine; she could do this. Besides, it wasn't like she would be alone… her dad would be with her, after all. Loan took a deep breath to calm herself before returning to her room to get dressed.

Wait…  _dressed?_

Loan  _was_ dressed. T-shirt, sweatpants… those were clothes, right? That was dressed.

_**If you're a hobo, sure.** _

The troubled girl's phone lit up with a  _ding,_ and Loan picked it up from the bed. 'Ready when u r' her father had texted her. Loan bit her lip, her thumb hovering over the touchscreen for a few moments before she sighed and typed in her response.

**be right down (**

Loan pocketed her phone and grabbed her Doom hoodie from the closet, throwing it on as she exited the room.

 

* * *

 

"Loan, you're biting your nails again."

"O-oh… sorry…" Loan mumbled, lowering her hand to her lap. Lincoln frowned, taking a moment to look over his jittery daughter as they stopped at a red light. It dawned on him that, save for their two trips to the city, this was the first time she'd left the house since moving in. She looked no less antsy than she had been then… if anything, she seemed even  _more_ on edge, which Lincoln could only guess was due to her current hormonal state. She was bouncing her leg, anxiously wringing her hands in her lap as though fighting the urge to start chewing her nails again. As she stared out the window, her eyes darted about so rapidly that, if he didn't know any better, he would have assumed she were being followed. Lincoln cleared his throat, turning his attention back to the road as the light turned green.

"So… I guess this is the first time you really get to see the town, huh?"

"Huh? Oh, um… y-yes." Loan replied. Lincoln gave a small nod, as though this weren't obvious enough already. Still, he found it necessary to at least make an  _attempt_  at conversation, if for no other reason than to hopefully distract the girl from her worries.

"Hazeltucky's a nice place," He said. "Quiet, peaceful. A bit boring maybe, but it's home."

"It, uh… it does seem nice, I guess." Loan admitted. Compared to the hustle and bustle of the city, Hazeltucky felt so much more relaxed… even  _if_  she stayed cooped up in her room all the time. Maybe getting out more wouldn't be such a bad thing after all.

_**It will be. You'll make a fool of yourself, like you always do.** _

Loan shut her eyes and took a deep breath through her nose.

"Loan? Are you alright?"

"Yeah… yeah, I'm fine." Loan said, forcing a smile. "Um… you… lived in Royal Woods before, right?"

"For a while, yeah," Her father said. "I mean, I lived upstate for a few years when I was in college, but we came back afterwards. Me and Ronnie, I mean. Just couldn't stay away, I guess…" Lincoln chuckled, scratching idly at his chin. "When Bobby was born, we figured we needed a change of scenery. Something a bit quieter after all that chaos, you know?"

"I guess that makes sense…" Loan muttered, just as a small drug store came into view. As her father made a turn and pulled into the parking lot, the young woman felt her stomach twist into knots again. "Oh… w-we're here already…"

"One of the benefits to a small town like this: everything's within arm's reach." Lincoln said. The SUV pulled into an empty spot and Lincoln put the car in park before turning to his daughter. Loan's gaze was fixed on the building standing before them, and she was chewing her lip apprehensively. Lincoln frowned and let out a soft sigh. "Loan… you don't have to come in if it makes you uncomfortable. Would you rather wait in the car?" Loan perked up at that.

"Um… would that really be okay…?" Her father nodded and Loan averted her eyes, pursing her lips in thought. On one hand, she  _did_  want to stay in the car, but on the other hand she couldn't help but feel like that would be unfair. Then again, he  _was_  offering, and it wasn't like she had wanted to come in the first place. "W-well… if you don't mind…"

"I don't. You just needed the pads, right?"

"Yes. Um, ultra-thin please." Loan said.

"Sure thing. I'll leave the keys… just don't go driving off without me, okay?" Lincoln said with a chuckle. Loan, however, gasped and shook her head.

"N-no, o-of course not…!" She sputtered. "I-I-I'd never… I mean, I-I don't even know how to drive, and I don't have a license so if I got pulled over I'd go to jail..."

"Loan, I was-"

"And it's not like I even have anywhere to go, you know…?"

"Loan-"

"N-not that I'd take it if I  _did,_ I promise-"

 _"Loan."_ Lincoln said, raising his palms in exasperation. "…I was joking." His daughter blinked, then sheepishly averted her eyes.

"O-oh. Um. Y-yeah, so was I." The girl stammered, her face growing hot with shame as her father tried and failed to stifle a snort of laughter.

_**Of COURSE he was joking, you fucking idiot.** _

"R-right… well, I shouldn't be too long. Give me a call if there's any problem, okay?" He said. Loan nodded, and once Lincoln had shut the car door behind him she let out a long groan and buried her face in her palms.

"Why am I like thiiis…" Loan whined. She sighed and rubbed her tired eyes before leaning back in her seat, really wishing she had grabbed her fidget cube on the way out. She could only hope that by the time her father returned he would have forgotten about the awkward exchange. Until then, she figured she may as well enjoy the peace and quiet.

Alone.

In a parked car.

…In an unfamiliar town.

 _No,_ Loan told herself, shaking her fears aside.  _No, it's fine. There are people around. Everything's-_

_…Did that guy just look at me?_

"Dad, _w-wait…!_ "Lincoln hadn't even made it inside before he heard his daughter's voice. "I-I changed my mind, I'm coming too!"

 

* * *

 

It was recess at Hazeltucky Elementary School; but while his fellow students ran and played, young Bobby sat alone on a bench with his face buried in a book, as far away from the action as Mrs. Heathers would allow. She glanced at him briefly from across the playground, sighing and shaking her head in disapproval before returning her attention to the other students. She wished the boy would at least  _try_ to be more sociable, but she knew from past attempts that pushing him to engage in his peers' activities was a fruitless endeavor.

"Look out!"

"Huh…?" Bobby looked up, only to be met with a red sphere hurtling directly towards him. Before he could do anything to react, a kickball smacked him right in the face with a loud  _thwap,_ making him drop his book. _"Ow!"_ The kickball bounced off and rolled a short distance before being scooped up by one of Bobby's classmates.

"Sorry, Bobby." The boy said between snickers. Bobby grumbled under his breath, rubbing his sore nose. It stung, but thankfully didn't seem to be bleeding.

"It's-" Bobby began, but the boy had already returned to his game. "…Fine." He let out a sigh as he picked up his book, dusting it off before resuming reading. Not that he was really taking it in… his thoughts had been elsewhere all day. Namely, with Loan.

He hadn't actually spoken to her since the previous night; she'd only woken briefly enough to let go of him and hadn't come down for dinner, nor for breakfast the following morning. He'd offered to go wake her, but his father had told him it was best to simply let her sleep. Bobby wasn't sure he fully agreed with that… after all, a good meal always helped raise  _his_ spirits when he was feeling down.

Beyond that, the issue with Lori still weighed heavily on his mind. It made no sense to him that his father's sister could also be the mother of his child. It dawned on him that he could have tried pressing Lori herself for more information when he had the chance, but quite frankly he hadn't wanted to be in her presence any longer than he had to. Sure, perhaps that was a bit unfair, seeing as he barely even  _knew_  the woman… but he couldn't help it. He may not have fully understood what happened between her and his father, but he understood enough to know that he didn't want anything to do with her.

The bell rang, signaling the end of recess and snapping Bobby out of his thoughts. He hopped down from the bench and lined up with the rest of his class; he stood in the back as always, keeping his gaze focused on the ground as they walked back to the classroom. But as the rest of his peers filed inside, Bobby lingered at the door beside Mrs. Heathers.

"Robert," The woman said. "Go on inside. Or did you need to use the restroom?"

"N-no, I…" Bobby paused, chewing his lip. He wanted answers, and Mrs. Heathers was a teacher… surely she'd have  _some_  sort of insight into this matter. But something in his gut told him that this was an issue best kept private for now. He sighed and shook his head. "…It's nothing."

 

* * *

 

Loan gently clutched her father's sleeve as they made their way through the aisles of the store, following so closely that she bumped into him when he stopped to grab a can of shaving cream.

"S-sorry…"

"It's alright. Um… are you sure you wouldn't rather stay in the car?" He asked; Loan chewed her lip in thought for a brief moment before shaking her head.

"No… no, it's okay." Loan let go of her father's sleeve, taking a deep breath before forcing a small smile. "Sorry about that. I-I'm fine, really." Lincoln studied her for a moment, then nodded.

"Alright. We're almost done, anyway." Lincoln returned to the task at hand, and Loan let out a soft sigh as she followed, never straying too far from her father's side. She knew it was silly to be so on edge, but couldn't help it… even if the store was nearly empty, she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so insecure.

_**When DON'T you feel insecure?** _

Before long the two were making their way up to the cashier, a young man no older than Loan… possibly younger. "Did you find everything okay?" He asked as Lincoln set down the basket.

"Yeah, thanks." Lincoln said, reaching into his pocket for his wallet.

"Um, da-" Loan began, before catching herself. "I-I mean, Uncle Lincoln, wait. I'll pay."

"Loan-"

"It's okay. I can afford it, besides…" The girl trailed off, giving a nervous chuckle. "I-it's the least I can do, you know…?" Lincoln was about to protest, but stopped himself; Loan was actually taking some initiative, after all.

"Well… alright, then." Lincoln gave his daughter a supportive smile. "Thanks, Loan." She returned the smile and took his place in front of the cashier as he began to scan the items. It may not have been much, but she owed it to her father to chip in in any way she could.

"How's your day been, miss?" The cashier asked politely; a simple question.

Simple for anyone but Loan, at least.

"Huh? O-oh, um…" She stammered. "M-my day? It's, uh… r-right… my day…" Loan chewed her lip apprehensively. Her  _day?_  Why did it matter how her day was?! Her day wasn't even over!

_**Answer, Loan.** _

Instead, Loan stood frozen in place. The cashier seemed nonplussed by her lack of a response… clearly, he was used to being ignored by snooty customers. But Loan wasn't snooty, or at least she wasn't  _trying_  to be. She was just trying to buy some things and get back home. Why did he have to put her on the spot like this?

_**Fucking hell, it's a simple question.** _

The nervous woman gripped the countertop, feeling that familiar tightness in her chest. She shut her eyes, taking a deep breath;  _not now,_ she thought.  _You're fine. Everything's fine._

Loan glanced over at her father; he was starting at her with a raised eyebrow, as though she were acting weird. Was she acting weird? No, of  _course_  she was acting weird. She flicked her eyes back to the cashier, sweat beginning to form on her brow. This was a nightmare. She was making a fool of herself… she had to say  _something._

_**Just say 'fine'.** _

"Your total is-"

" _Fine!_ " Loan blurted out far louder than intended, making both the cashier and her father jump slightly. "M-my day's been fine! Y-you know… just n-needed… needed to get some things…!"

_**Loan-** _

"Those," She continued, pointing to the box of pads. "We needed those."

_**Loan, stop talking.** _

"I-I mean…  _I_ did. Not… not him." Loan explained, gesturing towards her baffled father. "Obviously…"

_**Oh, God.** _

"I-I mean, he… he's a guy, and guys don't… you know." Loan gave a drawn-out, nervous laugh. "Th-that'd be… that'd be weird… right…?"

Silence. The cashier was staring at her wide-eyed, clearly taken aback by her rambling; her father, meanwhile, buried his face in his palm in secondhand embarrassment. Loan swallowed, her cheeks growing hot.

_**Jesus. Fucking. Christ.** _

"R-right, well…" The cashier cleared his throat. "Your total is thirty-eight dollars and thirteen cents."

"O-okay," Loan squeaked, bowing her head to hide her beet-red face behind her bangs. She wished she could just disappear. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so humiliated, if ever; even flashing Bobby hadn't been  _this_  embarrassing.

_**You're such a train wreck.** _

Loan sighed and tried to force it out of her mind as she reached into her pocket. The damage was done. All she could do was pay so they could get out of there already… hopefully she'd never see the man again, and this whole incident could be put behind-

Oh, no.

"Loan?" Lincoln asked as his daughter hung her head in shame. "Is something wrong?"

"I, um…" Loan muttered dejectedly. "…I forgot my wallet…"

_**And there it is: the cherry on top of the shit sundae.** _

Loan stood off to the side as her father paid, doing her best to look as small and unnoticeable as possible lest she make things any more awkward than she already had. Plus, the sheets of toilet paper she'd shoved into her boxers as a makeshift pad were starting to get uncomfortable, and she really just wanted to get home as quickly as possible.

"Alright, I guess that's that." Lincoln said, approaching the girl with shopping bag in hand. "You ready to go?"

As if he even had to ask.

"Yea-" Just as she was about to take a step forward, Loan froze, an uncomfortable grimace crossing her face. Lincoln blinked, about to ask what was wrong… until she clamped her thighs tightly together and began to awkwardly fidget in place. "U-umm…"

"You, ah… need one now, don't you?" Lincoln asked; Loan bit her lip and gave a small, bashful nod. Lincoln wasted no time, quickly tearing open the package and handing one of the individually wrapped pads to his daughter. "Bathroom's in the back. I'll, uh… I'll wait here I guess." She mumbled a quiet thank you before hurriedly shuffling off, nearly knocking over a cardboard M&M's display in her haste. Lincoln sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Yep… that girl's my daughter, all right."

 

* * *

 

At first glance, Tokyo didn't seem all that different from any other metropolitan city… and yet somehow, it was unlike anything Lori had seen before. The late hour meant that the city was brilliantly illuminated; the streets seemed cleaner, the buildings newer and more modern. It was beautiful.

"What's all this…?" Lori asked as they drove through a colorful area lit with bright, neon lights. The buildings and storefronts were adorned with characters from anime and video games, some of which even seemed familiar to Lori.

"Ah, this is Akihabara. Think of it like Times Square for otaku."

"That's… nerds, right?"

"I suppose that's one way to look at it, yes." Mr. Tanaka chuckled. "Though 'fan' might be a better term."

"I see…" Lori muttered, taking out her phone and snapping a few pictures through the window. She'd need to come by here sometime… Loan was into such things, after all. Of course, she knew fully well that she couldn't just  _buy_  her daughter's trust, but perhaps it would be a start.

 

* * *

 

Loan breathed a sigh of relief as she slid up her sweatpants, pad nestled comfortably in place; though a few drops of blood had reached her boxers, she hadn't bled all the way through. Had even a minute or two more passed she might not have been so lucky, so at least  _something_ was going right for a change.

Loan chucked the wrapper in the trash bin and thoroughly washed her hands. Not that she really  _needed_ to, but it was a force of habit any time she was in a bathroom. As she dried her hands, her gaze wandered towards the mirror and, as expected, she looked terrible.

 _What else is new,_ she thought to herself.

The young woman frowned and tried to pull up her hood, but this only served to awkwardly bunch up her hair around her face. Loan flipped it back down with a groan of resignation before leaving the restroom, being sure to keep her head low as she made her way to the front of the store.

"All good?" Her father asked. Loan forced a smile and nodded.

"Yeah… much better. Thanks for waiting…" She said, only to gasp and shake her head. "N-not that I expected you to leave me or anything! I-I know you wouldn't do that, I-"

"Loan. It's alright," Lincoln said softly, placing his hand on the girl's shoulder. "Let's… get you home, okay?" Loan hung her head, quietly muttering in agreement. She was grateful that her father had stopped her before she made even more of a fool out of herself, but his reassuring tone did little to soothe her anxiety.

_**You're such a fucking mess.** _

Loan said nothing as they walked to the car, nor as she and her father took their seats. Lincoln turned the key in the ignition, the motor revving to life; he put the car in reverse but, rather than back out, he hesitated. Finally, the man let out a sigh and put the car back in park, to Loan's confusion.

"Dad…?" The girl's brow furrowed in concern. "Um… i-is something wrong?"

"Actually, that's what I was gonna ask you." Lincoln said. He chewed his lip as he mulled over his words before turning to his daughter with a gentle frown. "What's going on, Loan? You're really out of it today, even considering… you know, everything." Loan frowned, turning away from her father as she absentmindedly wrung at her sleeve. She didn't really have an answer, but Lincoln pressed on. "…It's because of your mom leaving, isn't it?" Loan bristled slightly at the reminder.

…However.

"…No." She said quietly. "I-I mean… I don't know. Maybe a little, but… I don't think that's it."

"Well… do you know what it  _might_  be?" Lincoln asked. "Because… I'd like to help you if I can." Loan furrowed her brow in thought, letting out a sigh as she slumped back in her seat. Yes, she was on her period. Yes, her mother's farewell still weighed heavily on her mind. But that was no excuse for her current state; even by her standards she was tense, unfocused, and above all else…

_**Pathetic?** _

…Uneven.

"…Oh." Loan gasped. "Oh… I'm such an idiot," She groaned, burying her face in her palm.

"What?"

"M-my meds," Loan muttered. "I forgot to take them today… ugh, I'm so  _stupid!"_

"Loan-"

"I-I'm sorry…!" She stammered, hanging her head in shame. "I don't… you know I usually never forget them, but…"

"Loan, it's okay." Lincoln assured the frantic girl. "It's a simple mistake, that's all. Honestly, considering everything… I can't really blame you. You've had a lot on your mind."

"S-still…" Loan reflexively raised her hand to her mouth to chew her nails again, but Lincoln gently took her hand in his before giving it a light squeeze. Loan forced herself to look up at him, finding herself calmed somewhat by his gentle smile.

"Relax. It's still early, right? You can just take them when we get home," Her father said. "I mean, I forget mine from time to time too… it's nothing to worry yourself over." Loan frowned, letting out a sigh before giving a small nod of understanding. She knew he was right, but…

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have anything to-"

"No, it's…" Loan muttered. "…I-I'm sorry I embarrassed you. That was…"

"Cringy?" Loan couldn't help but giggle at her father's bluntness. He chuckled as well and gave a small shrug. "Don't worry about it. I've embarrassed myself  _and_ others more times than I can count. It's just kinda part of life, especially in  _this_  family. Like when Bobby walked in on-"

 _"D-Dad!"_ Loan whined, her face turning bright red. "Don't bring that up…!" Her father laughed again.

"Sorry, sorry. Just saying… awkward moments happen. Just gotta shrug it off and move on, you know?" Lincoln said. Loan took a moment to chew over his words, idly watching the passerby through the window.

"…I guess," She said at last. She had to admit, he was right… she'd had no shortage of awkward moments in the past, and she was sure to have even more going forward. Eventually, she'd likely forget all about this particular incident.

_**Just wait 'til the next one, 'cause you're on a fucking ROLL.** _

"Tell you what," Lincoln said. "I dunno about you, but I'm feeling pretty hungry. What do you say we grab something from the Burpin' Burger on the way home?" The mere mention of food made Loan acutely aware of how hungry she was… she hadn't eaten all day, after all. Plus, thanks to her current hormonal state, a greasy burger sounded like it would hit the spot.

"Yeah… that'd be great." Loan said with a smile.

 

* * *

 

The bell marked the end of the school day, and as the students poured out of their classrooms into the hallway Bobby once again found himself being mercilessly bumped and jostled by the crowd. Normally he'd wait a bit to avoid the rush, but he wanted to get home as quickly as possible; at least, he would  _like_ to if he could just get out of this crush.

"U-um, excu-  _ow._ P-please, can you-  _guh!"_ Despite his best attempts to make his presence known, the diminutive boy went unnoticed by the throngs of students. He found himself squished between two students' backpacks, struggling in vain to push through, until someone grabbed onto his own backpack and yanked him out with a yelp. Bobby gasped for air before turning to properly thank his savior. "Th-thanks, Char-"

Bobby froze. Standing behind him wasn't Charlie… in fact, quite the opposite. Instead he found himself staring at none other than Hayden and his lanky cohort, Andy. They wore amused sneers on their faces as they glowered down at him. "A-ah…"

"Hey there, Dobby. Looked like you were havin' some trouble," Hayden said with that smug smirk of his; Bobby lowered his gaze, staring down at the floor and giving a small nod. Hayden frowned at the boy's silence, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Well? What d'you say?"

"…Thanks," Bobby muttered under his breath. The two larger boys snickered at his expense, and he wanted nothing more than to get away from them… but the crowd surrounding them made this borderline impossible.

"This is the second time I've helped ya out, y'know… but I dunno. I don't think you sound all that grateful."

"I-I-"

"What do you think, Andy?" The boy asked, ignoring Bobby's attempt to interject. "I think lil' Dobby here owes us one, how 'bout you?"

"Heh, yeah. I think he does." The taller boy nodded in agreement. Bobby grit his teeth, but he knew better than to argue… better to do a favor for the two bullies than risk a beating from them.

"…What do you want?" He asked quietly. The two punks exchanged a smirk before unzipping their backpacks. They rifled through them a moment, soon withdrawing several papers and shoving them into Bobby's hands.

"Here."

"What's this…?"

"Our homework," Hayden replied. "You don't mind doin' it for us, do ya?" Bobby's brow furrowed as he looked at the worksheets he'd been given; they were complicated.  _Far_ more complicated than he was used to, at least… the math page alone was full of problems he couldn't even begin to process let alone understand.

"I… I don't…" Bobby mumbled. "I-I can't-" Bobby quickly clammed up as Hayden leaned forward, glaring at him threateningly. "I-I mean," Bobby sputtered. "I… you're a grade above me! I can't do this!"

"Sure you can… and you  _will._ Ain't that right, Dobby?" The bully's tone left no room for argument… either do what he said, or face the consequences. Bobby swallowed, giving a small, reluctant nod. "Good boy," Hayden sneered, roughly tousling the boy's hair before bumping his way past him. "You're a smart lil' guy. I'm sure you'll do juuust fine." Bobby frowned, giving a sigh of resignation.

"Why me…?"

"Because," Andy scoffed as he flicked the boy's forehead, eliciting a yelp of pain. "We don't  _want_ to." With that, he too bumped his way past to follow his friend. Bobby looked down at the papers, sighing again before putting them away in his backpack.

It had been such an adequate day, too.

The bullies' interruption had, if nothing else, given enough time for the crowd to thin out a bit. Bobby grumbled under his breath as he made his way to his locker, now more eager than ever to get home.

 

* * *

 

Loan lay in her bed in a considerably better mood than she had been a few hours prior. Sure, she was still cramping a bit, but she was sated, her meds had been taken, and, perhaps most importantly… she was on a roll in Monster Hunter. Not a single failed hunt all day, even if she'd come close a few times.

With another victory under her belt, Loan shut her handheld and set it aside; her eyes were starting to get tired, after all. Last thing she wanted was to break her winning streak on account of blurred vision. She got up and stretched, her back letting out several satisfying pops as she did so. She must have been lying there even longer than she'd thought. Then, she heard a gently knock on the door.

"Oh, um… come in!" The door opened, and Loan smiled brightly as she saw none other than her little brother standing in the doorway.

"…Hi, Loan. I'm home."

"Bobby! Welcome-" The girl paused as she noticed his expression; he looked absolutely miserable. Well, more so than usual, anyway. "Um… are you okay…?" Bobby frowned, averting his eyes briefly. Part of him wanted to tell her about the bullies, but what good would that do? She'd just tell his parents, then they'd get involved, and in the end things would undoubtedly be even worse for him than they already were. Instead the boy simply sighed and shook his head.

"...Yes," He lied.

"Are you sure…? You look-"

"I'm fine," He mumbled, staring at the floor sheepishly. "I just, um… I have a lot of homework."

"Oh…"

"A-anyway, I need to get started, so…"

"O-oh, wait…" Loan said, stopping the little boy just as he was about to leave. He looked up at his sister with a curious gaze, and she fidgeted slightly before continuing. "I, um… I'm sorry. A-about last night, I mean… I shouldn't have just hugged you without permission, o-or fallen asleep on you, or-"

"It's okay." Bobby cut in, a concerned look crossing his face. "…You were really sad, weren't you?" The older woman frowned and gave a small nod. "Are you okay now…?"

"I…" Loan began, trailing off as she considered her words. "…I'm… better." Her response was too vague for Bobby's liking. She was still hurting, he was sure of it… and he couldn't blame her. If one of his parents were to move away, he didn't know  _how_ he would feel.

"Um… do you want to play something later…?" Bobby asked. "A-after I finish my homework, I mean." Loan blinked, then smiled warmly.

"Of course I would," She said with a nod. Bobby returned her smile, albeit with a far slighter one.

"…Okay. See you..." And with that, Bobby left his sister to her privacy, being sure to close the door behind him. Bobby stepped into his room, flipping on the lights and setting his backpack down. He'd need to get started right away if he wanted any time to play with Loan. A part of him wanted to ask her for help with his work… well, perhaps not  _his_ work, but he didn't want to risk her figuring things out. He didn't like lying to Loan, or  _anyone_  for that matter… but he  _really_  didn't like involving others in his problems, either.

Still, he couldn't help but wonder if she somehow  _knew._ She always asked if he was okay when he was feeling down, despite his best efforts to hide it. He didn't know why, but the fact that she seemed to notice made him… happy. Few ever noticed, not that he  _wanted_ them to, but… still. It was a strange feeling, and, like many things Bobby wasn't quite sure what to make of it.

Bobby shrugged of his thoughts. He'd need to get started right away if he wanted any time to play with Loan, after all. He slipped off his hoodie and, as he approached the hamper, something within caught his eye… something that made the little boy's blood run cold.

 

* * *

 

Loan sat back down on her bed. That was enough of a break… it was time to get back to hunting. But just as she picked up her 5DS, a  _ding_  from her phone stopped her in her tracks. Loan groaned, setting the handheld aside and picking up her phone. She almost set it back down without looking as she saw it was a text from her mom. With a sigh, she checked it to find that it was a picture.

Loan's eyes went wide. She knew that place… she'd seen it countless times in anime. It was Akihabara. The Mecca for otaku; if she had to name any one reason why she wanted to visit Japan someday that would be it. 'Drove by here 2day. Let me kno if u want me 2 get u anything' her mother had said. Loan blinked before a soft smile crossed her face. 'Okay, thanks' she texted back. She appreciated the gesture, and she could already think of several upcoming releases she was hoping to get her hands on… but she decided against immediately bombarding her mother with requests. Just as she was about to set her phone back down, her door flew open with a  _bang._ She yelped and jumped, the phone flying out of her hands.

" _L-Loan!"_ It was Bobby, looking more frantic than she had ever seen him before; his eyes were wide and he looked a bit pale. "A-are you okay?!"

"W-what…?!" Loan gasped, her heart racing from the sudden intrusion. Bobby rushed to her side, and she noticed he was holding some sort of cloth.

"Y-you got hurt, right?!" The boy asked; Loan had no idea what he was talking about.

…Until he held up the cloth.

"Ah… ah…" Loan stammered, her face turning red as a tomato.  _"AaaAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"_ She shrieked in horror, and a moment later their father came bursting in, a panicked look on his face.

"Loan?! What happened?!" He asked; Loan could only sputter unintelligibly, her face red with shame. Bobby ran to his father's side.

"D-Dad! Loan's  _hurt!"_ Bobby cried.

"What're you-" Lincoln trailed off as his son held up the cloth for him to see. Lincoln froze, a blank look crossing his face; and then, he bit his lip, struggling to hold in the laughter. He knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't help it. "O-oh my God." Lincoln snorted, his daughter turning an even deeper shade of crimson.

His son was holding Loan's bloodstained boxer shorts.

" _D-Dad…!"_  Loan whined as her father finally cracked, breaking into peals of hysterical laughter. Bobby had no idea why his father was laughing… Loan was bleeding, after all. Shouldn't he be worried? Bobby glanced between his father and sister in confusion, and finally the man's laughs petered off; Lincoln had laughed so hard that there were tears in his eyes, and he still couldn't help but chuckle as he wiped them away.

"S-sorry… sorry, I couldn't help myself," He managed to gasp out. He tried his best to force down his laughter and regain composure. "B-Bobby… your sister's fine."

"B-but…!" Bobby sputtered, his trembling as he waved the stained undergarments. "B- _blood!"_ It took every ounce of willpower not to burst out laughing again.

"Th-that's…" Lincoln looked up to his daughter, who had her face buried in her hands out of shame. "Come on, Bobby. I… I think it's time I explain something to you," He said.

"Huh…?" Bobby tilted his head in confusion, planting his heels as his father tried to guide him out of the room. "B-but Loan-"

"Is  _fine,_ trust me." He assured his son. "Now come on. Let's… give your sister some space, okay?" Bobby frowned, looking over his shoulder as his father ushered him out of the room. As soon as they were gone, Loan groaned and flopped down on her stomach, burying her face in her pillow in shame.

_**Beautiful work, Loan.** _

_Shut up,_ she told herself.  _That one wasn't my fault!_

_**Oh, it'll get worse.** _

After several minutes Loan sighed and rolled back over, her cheeks still bright red with embarrassment. She tried to remember her father's words from before… this wasn't that big of a deal, right? Soon enough she would forget it, and  _Bobby_ would forget it, and it would be like nothing ever happened.

_**You know it's coming.** _

"Loan…?"

_**And here. We. GO.** _

Loan sat up to see her little brother standing in the doorway, his cheeks tinged pink; in any other context, he'd look positively adorable.

But right now? Not so much.

"H-hey, Bobby…" She managed to squeak out. The boy chewed his lip, sheepishly grinding his foot against the floor. "Um… what's, uh… what's up…?"

"Well, I…" Her brother muttered under his breath.

_Oh, God._

"I, um… I-I'm sorry."

_Please don't-_

"…About your period."

_**Aaand there it is.** _

 

* * *

 

Luna kept her hands jammed deep into her pockets as she slunk through the busy streets of San Jose, California. She was alone… something Jerry never approved of, and that Sam certainly wasn't crazy about. But Luna needed to be alone right now. She needed space to  _think._  Besides, she was wearing a hooded jacket and dark sunglasses… surely nobody would recognize her, at least on first glance.

Luna sighed, stopping to wait at a crossway. She hadn't spoken to Lincoln in weeks, not since he had royally – and rightfully – chewed her out for her lies. There was not a single part of her that could blame him for that. She'd been thrust into a situation where there  _was_  no right thing to do, and now… well, she doubted her relationship with Lincoln would ever be the same. At best, he would always harbor some resentment towards her. At worst, he'd never want to speak to her again.

 _That_ would hurt her more than she could bear.

The  _walk_ signal soon flashed and she pressed on, not having any real destination in mind. She often did this with Sam, at least when time allowed… they both loved to travel and take in the sights. Granted, they'd been to San Jose plenty of times before, and she couldn't really consider this 'taking in the sights' by any stretch of the imagination. She was practically on autopilot, only stopping to pick up a pack of smokes from the corner store. Jerry didn't like her to smoke, but she didn't care, he wasn't  _here_ , and even if he  _was_ , fuck it. Luna hadn't gotten this far by following rules.

"Hey, isn't that…?"

 _Dammit,_ Luna thought; she'd been recognized.

"Nah… couldn't be."

She breathed a sigh of relief and quickened her pace. Normally, Luna didn't mind stopping for autographs or photos… hell, both she and her wife relished the opportunity to interact with fans one-on-one, without any of the red tape or corporate bullshit. But today, she just didn't have the patience for it.

"Holy shit, I think that's Luna Loud!"

" _Fuck."_ Luna hissed. She assumed it must be the hair... that purple streak stood out like a sore thumb, even with her hooded jacket.

…Her Velvet Lips  _tour_ jacket.

Actually, that may have been it.

"U-um, excuse me…!" Luna ignored the fan and quickly disappeared into the crowd, ducking into an alleyway as soon as she had the opportunity. She darted around the corner, waiting for a minute or so to make sure she'd given them the pass. Sure enough no one followed her, and she let out a deep breath. Well, she supposed this was as good a time as any for a smoke.

She unwrapped her box of cigarettes, placing one between her lips and lighting it. Luna took a long drag before blowing a thick plume of smoke.  _Yeah, that's better,_ she thought. She'd technically given up smoking a long time ago, but she often fell back into old habits in times of stress. And this? This sure as hell was a time of stress. The tour helped to keep her distracted, at least, but both Sam and Jerry had noticed her change in behavior. She hadn't been herself, couldn't focus properly… this was the worse she had played in years, and a cursory glance at comments online told her that others had noticed as well.

Luna frowned as she thought of her wife. Sam was extremely concerned for her, and had pleaded with her to take some time off to rest. But she didn't want to disappoint their fans… they hadn't had to cancel a show in years, and Luna was in no rush to start now. Surely even a subpar show was better than  _no_ show, right?

The rocker sighed, her cigarette now little more than a smoldering stump. Luna figured she might as well head back to the bus… Sam was sure to be worried about her, after all. Besides, it wasn't like being out and about was doing anything to improve her mood. She dropped it to the ground and stamped it out, then made to leave.

" _Don't move."_

Just as Luna began to head down the alleyway she'd come in from, a high, raspy voice stopped her dead in her tracks. Before she could turn to face her intruder, she felt something hard pressing against the small of her back.

A gun.

" _Your money,"_ The assailant said.  _"All of it. NOW."_


End file.
